Wife Wants Temporary Exclusivity With Boyfriend

[Christinebitg]

It's double talk because the comment, as originally stated by MarshaA, was a swipe at polyandry:

"I've never liked the idea of polyandry. I think that hotwifing or even swinging, can be a great way to spice up a marriage, but cutting one partner out of the deal isn't my idea of spicing things up."

[4herpleasure89]

My last serious relationship before wife was poly. She made a similar request to her husband concerning me and it was just a matter of time till it was completely over for them. He saw the writing on the wall and moved on.

It's likely over for you too as you're not really poly...she's decided to pursue another partner and you allowed her to and they most likely will be moving forward without you. I hope I'm wrong for your sake but I would put money on the other outcome in a betting scenario.

I feel for you but there will be someone better suited for you in the future.

I may be completely wrong as I forgot one element that is crucial. Money... Is she financially dependent on you and if so can he provide a similar lifestyle. If she is dependent on you and he can't provide similar lifestyle you're probably safe.

Why would you want her to stay if that's the reason?

Good question. I certainly wouldn’t.

[ConfusedHubby65]

My last serious relationship before wife was poly. She made a similar request to her husband concerning me and it was just a matter of time till it was completely over for them. He saw the writing on the wall and moved on.

It's likely over for you too as you're not really poly...she's decided to pursue another partner and you allowed her to and they most likely will be moving forward without you. I hope I'm wrong for your sake but I would put money on the other outcome in a betting scenario.

I feel for you but there will be someone better suited for you in the future.

I may be completely wrong as I forgot one element that is crucial. Money... Is she financially dependent on you and if so can he provide a similar lifestyle. If she is dependent on you and he can't provide similar lifestyle you're probably safe.

Why would you want her to stay if that's the reason?

Good question. I certainly wouldn’t.

My wife is a CPA and makes a good income in her own right. Money has never been a factor.

[4herpleasure89]

I think the point is why would you want a relationship where the reasons for it staying together were anything other than mutual love for each other.

[R_H_NC]

It's double talk because the comment, as originally stated by MarshaA, was a swipe at polyandry:

"I've never liked the idea of polyandry. I think that hotwifing or even swinging, can be a great way to spice up a marriage, but cutting one partner out of the deal isn't my idea of spicing things up."

You are arguing in an empty room.

I agreed that MarshaA’s comment seemed to infer that polyandry was cutting one partner out.

He might have been a bit inelegant in his wording but another way to read his comment is as it applies to this thread and the story of the OP’s marriage and not polyandry. If that was indeed what he was trying to say, he is right.

If not, as I said, I have already stated I didn't agree with that position.

In the end, this is all moot as it applies to what I HAVE POSTED…..the OP HAS been cut out. That is the salient point and is what I have stated, now repeatedly.

I also suggest that perhaps you read up on the definition of ‘double-talk’. My comments were not a mixture of sense and nonsense (just the facts of this marriage as it stands now). Also they were not inflated or deliberately ambiguous. Actually, I was very straight forward.

[BBCfan]

My last serious relationship before wife was poly. She made a similar request to her husband concerning me and it was just a matter of time till it was completely over for them. He saw the writing on the wall and moved on.

It's likely over for you too as you're not really poly...she's decided to pursue another partner and you allowed her to and they most likely will be moving forward without you. I hope I'm wrong for your sake but I would put money on the other outcome in a betting scenario.

I feel for you but there will be someone better suited for you in the future.

I may be completely wrong as I forgot one element that is crucial. Money... Is she financially dependent on you and if so can he provide a similar lifestyle. If she is dependent on you and he can't provide similar lifestyle you're probably safe.

Why would you want her to stay if that's the reason?

Good question. I certainly wouldn’t.

My wife is a CPA and makes a good income in her own right. Money has never been a factor.

It sounds like you played it right for your situation...seems this guy likely blew it by wanting to steal her from you?

So now that you have an opening, have you considered pulling out your "A" game and try some romance leading to banging her a bit more frequently?

I'd want to make her reconsider this jerk by stepping up a bit.

[Christinebitg]

He might have been a bit inelegant in his wording but another way to read his comment is as it applies to this thread and the story of the OP’s marriage and not polyandry. If that was indeed what he was trying to say, he is right.

I agree with that.

[tim99uk]

OK. Gina is your wife and you are her husband, poly or not it does not matter. All that matters is that you both are happy with the dynamic and fuck the other guy. Sit down and discuss how things are moving forward and tell her what you are and are not prepared to deal with. This gives you both the option of moving on from the marriage if you are not getting what you want.

[ConfusedHubby65]

OK. Gina is your wife and you are her husband, poly or not it does not matter. All that matters is that you both are happy with the dynamic and fuck the other guy. Sit down and discuss how things are moving forward and tell her what you are and are not prepared to deal with. This gives you both the option of moving on from the marriage if you are not getting what you want.

Gina and I are doing much better. She’s still having sex more frequently with her boyfriend than with me, but that’s okay. When we do make love, she’s often been the one who has initiated things, and that means a lot to me. At least I’m no longer feeling replaced.

[R_H_NC]

Gina and I are doing much better. She’s still having sex more frequently with her boyfriend than with me, but that’s okay. When we do make love, she’s often been the one who has initiated things, and that means a lot to me. At least I’m no longer feeling replaced.

So the 'exclusivity' thing went away?

Glad to hear your anxiety of being replaced has been resolved.

[HOT4MYWIFE]

OK. Gina is your wife and you are her husband, poly or not it does not matter. All that matters is that you both are happy with the dynamic and fuck the other guy. Sit down and discuss how things are moving forward and tell her what you are and are not prepared to deal with. This gives you both the option of moving on from the marriage if you are not getting what you want.

Gina and I are doing much better. She’s still having sex more frequently with her boyfriend than with me, but that’s okay. When we do make love, she’s often been the one who has initiated things, and that means a lot to me. At least I’m no longer feeling replaced.

I'm very happy for you. Sounds like the exclusivity worked out as planned and you have a great marriage.

[Des 31]

I may be completely wrong as I forgot one element that is crucial. Money... Is she financially dependent on you and if so can he provide a similar lifestyle. If she is dependent on you and he can't provide similar lifestyle you're probably safe.

Exactly, but how would you know for sure? Security is a very powerful need and it would likely not be admitted?

Good point. Only thing better than a fat dick is a fat wallet. It must be engrained in women as overall they seem more concerned about the financial status of a man than men do women.

That's an interesting point, Afagehi7 and I think largely true. I have known a few guys who married for money but more women who nailed husbands mainly for the money.

~ Des

[afagehi7]

Exactly, but how would you know for sure? Security is a very powerful need and it would likely not be admitted?

Good point. Only thing better than a fat dick is a fat wallet. It must be engrained in women as overall they seem more concerned about the financial status of a man than men do women.

That's an interesting point, Afagehi7 and I think largely true. I have known a few guys who married for money but more women who nailed husbands mainly for the money.

~ Des

I think it's more engraved in females. In the wild men spread the seed whereby women need to have a guy who can provide sustained resources to ensure success of the family. I think we're just programmed differently from nature

[OZCPL]

How did Gina meet Bill and do you know how long back it happened.

When did you realise that your hotwife needed sex more often and what were the signs.

Could you please describe her for us body size and shape, does she work out, what drew you to her when you first met.

Great that things are working out for you both and that she has been intelligent enough not to let Bill make the rules that affect your marriage. This is especially so when you and your lovely sexy wife are the only ones in that marriage relationship and Bill is just the invited guest.

[Des 31]

My wife and I would be considered a "hotwife" couple, so my opinion isn't from the polyandry perspective. In the six or seven years (dependent on how one considers it began) my wife has been having sex with other men, she too has come to love other men. That hasn't been a problem for the stability of our marriage, but it seems to us that it cannot work unless both partners are happy with the way things are.

If either persistently feels insecure in the relationship and isn't happy with their sexual sharing is working out, I don't see how this can work. To us, our marriage is of paramount concern. If anything threatened that, we have sufficiently open communication to talk it out. My wife has broken off relationships with other men in the past for various reasons, although that sort of threat hasn't been one of those.

The OP's wife might consider pursuing another extramarital relationship and go through the pain of breaking this one off.

~ Des

[Squirming69]

I have been married three (3) times over the past 31 Years, each marriage had various alternative lifestyle approaches.

In my first marriage, more or less we maintained an open-marriage, and in my second marriage, we were both on this forum, and we begun our marriage as a Hotwife/Stag-Cuck modeled marriage which would eventual expand into a Poly-Triad along with a Poly-V later in our relationship with another man. During the two (2) Poly types relationships that my 2nd wife and I were involved in, there was lengthy periods of time within each when she would extend intercourse exclusivity to the other man (boyfriend/lover/partner). In both cases, it was much more then a sexually exclusivity, it was fluid bonding as they developed a deeper emotional bond.

It is critical that a husband and wife maintain an intimate connection, although maintaining intimate connections does not specific require sexual intercourse. A strong marriage should not have insecurities, and should have sufficiently open communication with comprehension.

It will be interesting to see how this scenario plays out.

[lookingiansa]

I have been married three (3) times over the past 31 Years, each marriage had various alternative lifestyle approaches.

In my first marriage, more or less we maintained an open-marriage, and in my second marriage, we were both on this forum, and we begun our marriage as a Hotwife/Stag-Cuck modeled marriage which would eventual expand into a Poly-Triad along with a Poly-V later in our relationship with another man. During the two (2) Poly types relationships that my 2nd wife and I were involved in, there was lengthy periods of time within each when she would extend intercourse exclusivity to the other man (boyfriend/lover/partner). In both cases, it was much more then a sexually exclusivity, it was fluid bonding as they developed a deeper emotional bond.

It is critical that a husband and wife maintain an intimate connection, although maintaining intimate connections does not specific require sexual intercourse. A strong marriage should not have insecurities, and should have sufficiently open communication with comprehension.

It will be interesting to see how this scenario plays out.

Is that why the 2nd wife is an ex wife? Did you get tired of being not able to fuck her while the other guy got all the fun?

What did you and third wife do that was alternative lifestyle as well?

Mr. Lookingiansa

[Squirming69]

I have been married three (3) times over the past 31 Years, each marriage had various alternative lifestyle approaches.

In my first marriage, more or less we maintained an open-marriage, and in my second marriage, we were both on this forum, and we begun our marriage as a Hotwife/Stag-Cuck modeled marriage which would eventual expand into a Poly-Triad along with a Poly-V later in our relationship with another man. During the two (2) Poly types relationships that my 2nd wife and I were involved in, there was lengthy periods of time within each when she would extend intercourse exclusivity to the other man (boyfriend/lover/partner). In both cases, it was much more then a sexually exclusivity, it was fluid bonding as they developed a deeper emotional bond.

It is critical that a husband and wife maintain an intimate connection, although maintaining intimate connections does not specific require sexual intercourse. A strong marriage should not have insecurities, and should have sufficiently open communication with comprehension.

It will be interesting to see how this scenario plays out.

Is that why the 2nd wife is an ex wife? Did you get tired of being not able to fuck her while the other guy got all the fun?

What did you and third wife do that was alternative lifestyle as well?

Mr. Lookingiansa

Mr. Lookingiansa,

It has been a while since I had logged into this forum, so just now seeing your questions. I will be more then happy to address each question with direct responses, if you like a more expanded response, feel free to also PM me.

In reference to: Is that why the 2nd wife is an ex wife? Did you get tired of being not able to fuck her while the other guy got all the fun?
The lifestyle was not what ended our marriage, we divorced for reasons that can be commonly found within any traditional marriage, such as financial infidelity, the misuse and attempted cover-up of how she was mismanaging family money. I have absolutely no issues with her being sexually exclusive within some of the men during our marriage. In both the Poly-Triad and Poly-V, there was a clear understanding by all involved, more details are available if you would like to PM.

In reference to: What did you and third wife do that was alternative lifestyle as well?

When we begun our relationship, then marriage, my 3rd wife was fully aware of my past, and had been my most recent lifestyle activities. Unlike my prior marriages, my current wife is an Alpha, as a result we have a Female Led Relationship/Marriage and also has my support in taking other lovers, partners, etc as she may desire. Similar to my 2nd marriage, for her to include another man, she also prefers to have sexual exclusivity with fluid bonding with the desire to develop a deeper emotional bond, beyond simply physical.

[Des 31]

. . . Has anyone had a similar situation as this? If so, how did things work out?

I have reconsidered my opinion on this since last posting...

I think I could put up with my 36-year-old wife being exclusive to another man for up to a couple of months if it were important to her, but that's never happened during the past eight years she has been dating other men. There have been a few times in which she and another guy were fucking nightly for a week or so while I slept in our guest room, and I didn't mind that.

I'm sure whether that could work would depend upon the couple's personalities, marital stability, and attitudes about how open their marriage can be. We consider our marriage to be on solid ground, with trust, understanding of the other, and good communication. For religious and moral reasons, neither of us believes in divorce with the exceptions of physical or psychological abuse, criminal activity on the part of either, or other similar extreme situations.

~ Des

[ucaneffher]

. . . Has anyone had a similar situation as this? If so, how did things work out?

I have reconsidered my opinion on this since last posting...

I think I could put up with my 36-year-old wife being exclusive to another man for up to a couple of months if it were important to her, but that's never happened during the past eight years she has been dating other men. There have been a few times in which she and another guy were fucking nightly for a week or so while I slept in our guest room, and I didn't mind that.

I'm sure whether that could work would depend upon the couple's personalities, marital stability, and attitudes about how open their marriage can be. We consider our marriage to be on solid ground, with trust, understanding of the other, and good communication. For religious and moral reasons, neither of us believes in divorce with the exceptions of physical or psychological abuse, criminal activity on the part of either, or other similar extreme situations.

~ Des

In my very early 20s, I managed to survive 4 months of zero pussy while the girlfriend would go out 3 to 4 nights a week with a lover who would soon become her boyfriend. I didn't get laid that entire summer and it was oddly erotic.

3 years later when approaching my mid 20s, she cut me off again but this time she was not playing. Zero pussy for 8 entire months and this time she was going out every single night 7 nights a week for 8 long months. So in total she cut me off for an entire year with two different men. Now that i am in my 30s, I believe that would be very accepting if my current gf told me that she wanted to try the lifestyle but wanted to save her pussy for her lover/boyfriend.

Now regarding the relationship surviving, i agree that there are tons of factors that dictate a relationships survival rate while playing risky games. Sending your girlfriend or wife to another man to solely pleasure her with penetrative sex is definitely playing with fire if you two aren't solid. My GF going away to live with another man (date him, fuck him, sleep with him, spend her days and nights with him) all total recipes for disaster but sometimes the kink is stronger and you dive in.

[Des 31]

~ Des

In my very early 20s, I managed to survive 4 months of zero pussy while the girlfriend would go out 3 to 4 nights a week with a lover who would soon become her boyfriend. I didn't get laid that entire summer and it was oddly erotic.

3 years later when approaching my mid 20s, she cut me off again but this time she was not playing. Zero pussy for 8 entire months and this time she was going out every single night 7 nights a week for 8 long months. So in total she cut me off for an entire year with two different men. Now that i am in my 30s, I believe that would be very accepting if my current gf told me that she wanted to try the lifestyle but wanted to save her pussy for her lover/boyfriend.

Now regarding the relationship surviving, i agree that there are tons of factors that dictate a relationships survival rate while playing risky games. Sending your girlfriend or wife to another man to solely pleasure her with penetrative sex is definitely playing with fire if you two aren't solid. My GF going away to live with another man (date him, fuck him, sleep with him, spend her days and nights with him) all total recipes for disaster but sometimes the kink is stronger and you dive in.

You have admirable self-discipline. I'm jerking off every night when my wife prepares herself to go out. I help my wife prep for dates whenever she allows it. Little compares to the excitement I get when she is about to leave for a date.

[ucaneffher]

~ Des

In my very early 20s, I managed to survive 4 months of zero pussy while the girlfriend would go out 3 to 4 nights a week with a lover who would soon become her boyfriend. I didn't get laid that entire summer and it was oddly erotic.

3 years later when approaching my mid 20s, she cut me off again but this time she was not playing. Zero pussy for 8 entire months and this time she was going out every single night 7 nights a week for 8 long months. So in total she cut me off for an entire year with two different men. Now that i am in my 30s, I believe that would be very accepting if my current gf told me that she wanted to try the lifestyle but wanted to save her pussy for her lover/boyfriend.

Now regarding the relationship surviving, i agree that there are tons of factors that dictate a relationships survival rate while playing risky games. Sending your girlfriend or wife to another man to solely pleasure her with penetrative sex is definitely playing with fire if you two aren't solid. My GF going away to live with another man (date him, fuck him, sleep with him, spend her days and nights with him) all total recipes for disaster but sometimes the kink is stronger and you dive in.

You have admirable self-discipline. I would be jerking off every night as my wife prepped to go out. I help my wife prep for dates whenever she allows it. Little compares to the excitement I get when she is about to leave for a date.

Discipline?! Lol i said zero pussy not zero sex. We still had intimacy such as oral and cuddles. I wasn't denied seeing her nude or anything. And believe me, I definitely jerked off every single night as I watched her get dolled up for her boyfriend every night.

In the beginning i would jerk off watching her in her thong in front of the mirror getting ready and doing her makeup and let her see me cum yo her looking sexy for another man and then again when she received that phone call letting her know that he was outside, she would leave the house super dolled up and sexy with a huge smile that she would be gone for the next 5 to 8 hours.

I also used to jerk off at night when she would come home at night and tell me the details but it started with her coming home around 11pm but as this became normal, she started coming home later and later. Most often between 1 and 2am but sometimes she'd show up 3 to 4am. I would be asleep by then. The times that she showed up when I was up she would start holding details and would tease me that i was inquiring about her and her boyfriends sex life and all i would know was that he came inside several times but that's all I'd get out of her.

Oddly enough the thought ofy girlfriend or wife having another man as her primary sex partner still appeals to me and i would not discart the suggestion if she ever brought it up. My only requirement is to be included one way or another. My mental rule is that i will go as far as 90/10. 90 being her and another man while her and i get 10. The 10% is basically me being kept in the loop with details and us still being intimate from time to time to keep our connection alive.

[Des 31]

~ Des

You have admirable self-discipline. I would be jerking off every night as my wife prepped to go out. I help my wife prep for dates whenever she allows it. Little compares to the excitement I get when she is about to leave for a date.

Discipline?! Lol i said zero pussy not zero sex. We still had intimacy such as oral and cuddles. I wasn't denied seeing her nude or anything. And believe me, I definitely jerked off every single night as I watched her get dolled up for her boyfriend every night.

In the beginning i would jerk off watching her in her thong in front of the mirror getting ready and doing her makeup and let her see me cum yo her looking sexy for another man and then again when she received that phone call letting her know that he was outside, she would leave the house super dolled up and sexy with a huge smile that she would be gone for the next 5 to 8 hours.

I also used to jerk off at night when she would come home at night and tell me the details but it started with her coming home around 11pm but as this became normal, she started coming home later and later. Most often between 1 and 2am but sometimes she'd show up 3 to 4am. I would be asleep by then. The times that she showed up when I was up she would start holding details and would tease me that i was inquiring about her and her boyfriends sex life and all i would know was that he came inside several times but that's all I'd get out of her.

Oddly enough the thought ofy girlfriend or wife having another man as her primary sex partner still appeals to me and i would not discart the suggestion if she ever brought it up. My only requirement is to be included one way or another. My mental rule is that i will go as far as 90/10. 90 being her and another man while her and i get 10. The 10% is basically me being kept in the loop with details and us still being intimate from time to time to keep our connection alive.

I can understand and completely relate to that. There's almost nothing like the thrill of watching my wife prep for a date with another man. When she finally is ready and walking out the door, I'm stroking madly, knowing another man's cock will soon be giving her pleasure to which a marital fuck cannot compare. She blows me a kiss and reminds me she might be home as late as sometime the following day.

She rarely has me drive her to another man's place to have sex, but I'm always willing to do as she wishes. When her guys come to our home, I do all I can to make sure they're comfortable and don't ask to be in the same room with them. At those times, I sleep in the guest room. We have found their sex is almost always better for her and most of her visitors if they're alone together. I don't do anything that might cause her to change her mind about fucking others. I love that as much as she does.

I loved reading your and your wife's experience at this. I think every couple is unique in their marital relationship and is best prepared to determine what works best for them.

[tito123177]

. . . Has anyone had a similar situation as this? If so, how did things work out?

I have reconsidered my opinion on this since last posting...

I think I could put up with my 36-year-old wife being exclusive to another man for up to a couple of months if it were important to her, but that's never happened during the past eight years she has been dating other men. There have been a few times in which she and another guy were fucking nightly for a week or so while I slept in our guest room, and I didn't mind that.

I'm sure whether that could work would depend upon the couple's personalities, marital stability, and attitudes about how open their marriage can be. We consider our marriage to be on solid ground, with trust, understanding of the other, and good communication. For religious and moral reasons, neither of us believes in divorce with the exceptions of physical or psychological abuse, criminal activity on the part of either, or other similar extreme situations.

~ Des

In my very early 20s, I managed to survive 4 months of zero pussy while the girlfriend would go out 3 to 4 nights a week with a lover who would soon become her boyfriend. I didn't get laid that entire summer and it was oddly erotic.

3 years later when approaching my mid 20s, she cut me off again but this time she was not playing. Zero pussy for 8 entire months and this time she was going out every single night 7 nights a week for 8 long months. So in total she cut me off for an entire year with two different men. Now that i am in my 30s, I believe that would be very accepting if my current gf told me that she wanted to try the lifestyle but wanted to save her pussy for her lover/boyfriend.

Now regarding the relationship surviving, i agree that there are tons of factors that dictate a relationships survival rate while playing risky games. Sending your girlfriend or wife to another man to solely pleasure her with penetrative sex is definitely playing with fire if you two aren't solid. My GF going away to live with another man (date him, fuck him, sleep with him, spend her days and nights with him) all total recipes for disaster but sometimes the kink is stronger and you dive in.

I get the same feeling that playing more risky games excites me the most, the idea of letting my wife go to live with his lover/boyfriend for some time while they fuck bareback and he is cumming inside her makes me so fucking horny, I don't know why. Would you let your partner do that?.

[ucaneffher]

. . . Has anyone had a similar situation as this? If so, how did things work out?

I have reconsidered my opinion on this since last posting...

I think I could put up with my 36-year-old wife being exclusive to another man for up to a couple of months if it were important to her, but that's never happened during the past eight years she has been dating other men. There have been a few times in which she and another guy were fucking nightly for a week or so while I slept in our guest room, and I didn't mind that.

I'm sure whether that could work would depend upon the couple's personalities, marital stability, and attitudes about how open their marriage can be. We consider our marriage to be on solid ground, with trust, understanding of the other, and good communication. For religious and moral reasons, neither of us believes in divorce with the exceptions of physical or psychological abuse, criminal activity on the part of either, or other similar extreme situations.

~ Des

In my very early 20s, I managed to survive 4 months of zero pussy while the girlfriend would go out 3 to 4 nights a week with a lover who would soon become her boyfriend. I didn't get laid that entire summer and it was oddly erotic.

3 years later when approaching my mid 20s, she cut me off again but this time she was not playing. Zero pussy for 8 entire months and this time she was going out every single night 7 nights a week for 8 long months. So in total she cut me off for an entire year with two different men. Now that i am in my 30s, I believe that would be very accepting if my current gf told me that she wanted to try the lifestyle but wanted to save her pussy for her lover/boyfriend.

Now regarding the relationship surviving, i agree that there are tons of factors that dictate a relationships survival rate while playing risky games. Sending your girlfriend or wife to another man to solely pleasure her with penetrative sex is definitely playing with fire if you two aren't solid. My GF going away to live with another man (date him, fuck him, sleep with him, spend her days and nights with him) all total recipes for disaster but sometimes the kink is stronger and you dive in.

I get the same feeling that playing more risky games excites me the most, the idea of letting my wife go to live with his lover/boyfriend for some time while they fuck bareback and he is cumming inside her makes me so fucking horny, I don't know why. Would you let your partner do that?.

My partner DID go live with her first boyfriend, the one she was exclusive with the first 4 months. After being exclusive with him 4 months, she broke the news on Monday that she was moving with him on Friday after work and needed help moving, . I helped her move out of our home and into a new apartment with him. She lived there 18 entire months. It was the most erotic thing ever done in the 7 years that we were in the lifestyle.

So in short, yes I would let my partner live with a boyfriend/lover.