Just Beginning

For hotwives and the men who adore them.
Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Fri Mar 10, 2017 1:08 pm

My wife had sex with only one person prior to our marriage. She told me she gave one other guy a blowjob when she was in high school. I'm trying to say she has limited exposure to fucking and never saw the dating/bar scene. I am looking for others who have a hotwife with a similar background and did her lack of experience create a feeling that she was missing something. Did those feeling help in her journey into hotwifing? I believe my wife's sexual inexperience with men may be tied up inside of her and often wonder if she is holding feeling, desires and fantasies inside.

HWSage
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by HWSage » Sat Mar 11, 2017 4:58 am

Mlghten wrote:My wife had sex with only one person prior to our marriage. She told me she gave one other guy a blowjob when she was in high school. I'm trying to say she has limited exposure to fucking and never saw the dating/bar scene. I am looking for others who have a hotwife with a similar background and did her lack of experience create a feeling that she was missing something. Did those feeling help in her journey into hotwifing? I believe my wife's sexual inexperience with men may be tied up inside of her and often wonder if she is holding feeling, desires and fantasies inside.
My wife was exactly the same, except for the blowjob. Never smoked, swore or drank. Only sex with one other guy, who she had married. He was very abusive and her parents yanked her out of the marriage as soon as they discovered it. When I met her she had not had sex in over 25 years. She lived with her parents most of her life. She was living with them when I met her. She was raised in a strict conservative Christian home. I felt like she deserved more. When we married, she was so naive it was unbelievable. She had never been to a club or bar (still hasn't). Rarely went to movies, never as a kid. She had a lot of questions that she had saved for after we married. She asked thing mostly about sex, for instance: Whats a blow job, then a year down the road: whats a dil-doe? These sort of questions were common as I shook my head in dis-believe that anyone could be that sheltered.

She did not feel like she was missing anything. She was happy and wanted nothing to do with being with another man. It took me about 6 months to convince her to do it, even then, it was for my birthday and was to be only once.

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Sat Mar 11, 2017 7:14 am

Mlghten wrote:My wife had sex with only one person prior to our marriage. She told me she gave one other guy a blowjob when she was in high school. I'm trying to say she has limited exposure to fucking and never saw the dating/bar scene. I am looking for others who have a hotwife with a similar background and did her lack of experience create a feeling that she was missing something. Did those feeling help in her journey into hotwifing? I believe my wife's sexual inexperience with men may be tied up inside of her and often wonder if she is holding feeling, desires and fantasies inside.
My wife grew up conservative, raised in church and she still is. ( I like the way people say "my wife is conservative and religious" like it means they can't love sex or be a hotwife. LOL )
She never danced, went to clubs or bars or any of that. I was her first, she never experienced another man until she became a hotwife. Even after becoming a hotwife, the thing is, that until we took care of our marriage and I won her trust and built intimacy between us, she still hid her true feelings about sex, still hid her desires and wants.

D_Lited_HubWife
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by D_Lited_HubWife » Sat Mar 11, 2017 7:32 am

My wife and I are the same. Her sex with only one other guy. Limited sexual experience past that. Never been to a bar, or a club. Drank only once, never smoked. But she loves sex. Her BF she had sex with, they did it every day. My wife is opening up more and more as our strength and intimacy in our marriage grows.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:54 pm

Had a series of things that went on this weekend I think we're helpful in our relationship. My wife and I don't drink too much, however, last night was one of the rare occasions. My wife had a squirting orgasm as I was fingering her. She holds back and never fully relaxes when this occurs. Following this she rolled over a few minutes later and wanted me to fuck her. While doing so, I asked her if she wanted to go out with her girlfriend and get laid by a guy. She immediately told me to stop talking. I had a massive orgasm after I said it. I was really upset with myself, as I violated my goal of making everything about her. We both went to sleep, at least she did and I got up early this morning.

This happening last night troubled me and I really wanted to talk to her about our relationship. This morning, I told her that I have been trying for over a year to really focus on her And building our relationship. She agreed I have been very different. I told her I read a relationship book that I wanted to share with her. I told her that I would share it in a few weeks when things settle down with her work load and we can focus on us. This scared her!!! She asked me if I was really worried about our relationship and if it was because of our friend pending divorce. I told her I wanted our relationship to be closer so we could confide anything in each other and I know she has been holding back. She agreed and asked me what she could do to make our relationship better. She then asked if I wanted her to "do something". I told her I would never want her to do anything she didn't want to do and would never want her to do anything she wasn't fully on board with doing. She said she knew I would never do that. We agreed to start meeting once a week for happy hour to have alone time where we could talk about our relationship. She told me she really wants to concentrate on our relationship and that I mean the world to her. I told her that I really want her to become herself with me and be able to tell me anything. She said she want to get to that point as well but just wasn't there yet.

Although the event of Saturday night were a mistake in my mind, it prompted the conversation that occurred today and I felt like I made real progress in our relationship. There is no doubt my wife knows my desire is in her becoming a hotwife. We talked a great deal between the kids interruptions and I felt a real bond with her. I believe she felt it as well. A short time ago, we both fell asleep on a movie. We woke up and when my wife was partially sleeping, she asked what things sexually turned me on. I told her to guess. She said making her squirt, and I responded that's one of them. When she asked what the other was, I told her to guess again. She insisted she didn't know and I responded with her being with another guy. She said, "oh, gosh", I love you goodnight. Yikes!!!

I feel we are moving along in this journey and was hoping I didn't really mess things up too much. I sure hope not! All of this just kinda happened and my feeling was we were able to connect with her knowing i want her to be a hotwife without coming out and saying it. One thing I thought was positive was she is not outright saying no or that isn't going to happen. Knowing my wife's dominate personality, I think she would have immediately come out and confronted me if she wasn't thinking about it. Thoughts???

Happyjohnson
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Happyjohnson » Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:03 pm

There's a saying in central Africa of "softly softly catchee monkey"!

Translation is that if you stalk a monkey very very slowly you will eventually catch that monkey!

The same holds true for you and your wife, just go slowly and you will eventually get her there! :mrgreen: :whip: :up:

Good luck!

HWSage
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by HWSage » Mon Mar 13, 2017 9:50 am

I think you are doing the right thing. Get her to read the book, that way she will be much more educated. Made a big difference to my wife. When I brought up being with someone else so we could have much better sex and be more intimacy, she understood. Of course now you know how to make her adore you too, that goes a long way as well in getting your wife to trust you more. Every woman's fantasy is another guy, even if they feel bad for thinking it. You just need to convince her it is okay. Looks to me like you are on track.

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Dutch
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Dutch » Tue Mar 14, 2017 7:36 am

Mlghten wrote:This is my very first post so bear with me. I have been reading a great deal about hotwifing and the thought of my wife experiencing the best of both worlds is my ultimate goal. We have a terrific relationship, however, our vanilla sexual relationship is not cutting it for either of us. We are very conservative but I think she knows we are lacking something. The thought of her with another man excites me to no end. Just thinking of her obtaining the ultimate sexual experience and sharing it with me has been on my mind for over a year. She is beautiful and I'm looking for solid advice on where to go from hear. Over the last year I have helped her dress sexier and her appearance has not gone unnoticed.
My wife was so conservative that when she got out of high school, she seriously considered becoming a Nun. I, (and a whole lot of other guys) are glad she didn't. :lol:

BallSpanking
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by BallSpanking » Tue Mar 14, 2017 7:43 am

Dutch wrote:My wife was so conservative that when she got out of high school, she seriously considered becoming a Nun. I, (and a whole lot of other guys) are glad she didn't. :lol:
I guess there would've been nun of that... :???:
Schwiiiiing ... Thud! (Projectile erection becomes vicious uppercut KO!)

Lkncouple
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Lkncouple » Tue Mar 14, 2017 11:37 am

Mlghten,
I am in a very similar situation as you. My wife was a virgin when we met, she had only given a guy a handjob. She was brought up very conservative. Even though we have a fairly active sex life(2-3 times a week) she claims she does not nor has she ever had any sexual fantasies. She claims to not like porn, although when we watch it she gets extremely wet. A few years ago I ran across a video of a guy watching his wife fuck and I really liked it. I then started talking about a threesome with another man. She did not really respond to it very well. She knows my sex drive is much more than hers and she has been accommodating for me to try kinkier and kinkier things. First off, we started with vibrators, she really liked them, I found a "Rabbit" type vibrator that is really thick and much longer than me, and we started playing with it. Many times during our sessions, after she blows me, I will eat her then fuck her with it, and talk dirty to her. Now many times, she will tell me to talk dirty to her, and she will ask me if I am enjoying watching her getting fucked by a big dick. I did find some "Hotwife" porn, when it is not degrading and the Husband is watching the wife and gently touching or kissing her while someone is fucking her. We watched some last night and she went wild. Normally she doesn't like it, but last night she was wild!

I really doubt that it will ever come to a reality for us. As I said she has been very accommodating, even to the point where we have gone to a couple of swingers clubs and watch people have sex. We have even gone to a nude/swingers resort(Desire) 3 times. There have been lots of opportunities for her to have sex with other men or women and she has no interest. There have been a couple of times when we were in the hot tub at Desire and everyone is Naked and people are doing stuff all around. Some people have sucked her nipples. One time she pulled a guy over to where we were by his hard cock, but more as a joke than sexual(Although I have told her on many occasions that it was the hottest thing I have ever seen). All in all, I think I have been interested in Hotwifing this for about 6 years. We will make a little progress, then take a step back. My advice to you is be patient, communicate, make sure that both of you are having fun and slowly introduce things.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Tue Mar 14, 2017 11:59 am

Lkncouple
Thanks for the advice. There are a lot of similarities in our relationships. Over the last year, my wife has widened our sexual boundaries. We have had anal sex, used a vibrator just like you two. My wife didn't really like the vibrator and like your wife says she doesn't like porn. She says it doesn't do anything for her, however, she gets really wet and we fuck every time. I believe her upbringing makes her want to say she doesn't like it however, her body is not in sync with what she says. I am working on getting her to open up with me in every way. This will allow her to be herself and tell me what she truely feels and desires. I like when she is in control.

My wife and I have not tried swingers clubs or resorts at this point and I'm not sure if that will ever happen. Thanks for responding and any additional advice is welcome. Let me know how you all are moving along.

OZCPL
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by OZCPL » Tue Mar 14, 2017 8:12 pm

Mlghten wrote:Lkncouple
Over the last year, my wife has widened our sexual boundaries. We have had anal sex, used a vibrator just like you two. My wife didn't really like the vibrator and like your wife says she doesn't like porn. She says it doesn't do anything for her, however, she gets really wet and we fuck every time. I believe her upbringing makes her want to say she doesn't like it however, her body is not in sync with what she says. I am working on getting her to open up with me in every way.

My wife and I have not tried swingers clubs or resorts .
She has some hang-ups and is working with your help to get over them. She has to give herself permission to, admit to herself and tell you the naughty thoughts she has. She has to travel at her own pace but I think your marriage will bloom and you will grow closer together as you both explore the path you are on. Please remember, whatever you both do in your marriage, the kids need to feel loved and secure, rather than the first priority be her fun or yours.

If I were you I would forget swingers clubs for the present, may put too much pressure on her. I would think its possible she will one day take an interest in an attractive guy who wants to talk to her. That is when you need her to be telling you who she is talking to and if she is enjoying the interaction.

Great that she is enjoying dressing more attractively and the admiration it brings her way.

Do you have any pics of her

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Wed Mar 15, 2017 6:03 am

OZCPL
Appreciate your response. We are not even close to thinking about swingers clubs or any type of thing at this point. I am working on building our relationship and becoming completely open with everything between the two of us. I do hope it leads to hotwifing at some point, but, I think that is secondary to developing our marriage first.

My wife is very beautiful and very sexy woman who works out at least three times a week. I hope to eventually post some pictures of her in the future. I want to get her permission before this occurs and we just are not there yet. I would love for her to see responses to her pictures, as I think it would do a lot of her self esteem. Thanks for the advice

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PlayboyFan
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by PlayboyFan » Wed Mar 15, 2017 6:45 am

Mighten,

I think you are making terrific progress. From reading the thread, it appears that you have progressed to:

1. She has changed her style of dress to where she likes to dress for attention.
2. She knows that it excites you to see her receive attention from other men.
3. Most importantly......you have stated that you would like to see her with other men, so from here on out your position is clear and she has not flat-out refused.That is huge! An enviable position!
4. Your relationship is solid and improving even with her knowing your ultimate goal/ desire.

Personally, from my vantage point...I think the slow-walk method is working just fine. You have nothing left to hide and from here on out can simply take any opportunity to keep it part of the discussion. Even if its in a teasing fashion, make it a regular part of your pillow-talk or friendly banter between you.

One thing for sure....she hasnt forgotten what you have told her. That you can be certain of. She just doesn't UNDERSTAND it. Its like me and calculus. It just doesnt compute. Im betting the major issue for her now is "why?".

Its easy for me to say, but since you have now established with her WHAT you fantacise about, I would start attempting to convey to her WHY you find it so cool and sexy. When she realizes what you are doing is a team project and that its the two of you TOGETHER involved in something so sexy, you may see some progress.

Good luck.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Wed Mar 15, 2017 7:42 am

PlayboyFan
You are spot on as to where we are at in this journey. We are not at the point where we are openly talking about hotwifing, and I believe it is because my wife is not comfortable with telling me her true feelings. She is definitely holding some things back from me. We are scheduling time alone away from our home to have quality, uninterrupted conversations. I'm sure you are right with her knowing my desire and wondering "why". My hope is that she opens up to me on a number of things she has not felt comfortable in telling me. When this happens, I think the conversation will ultimately lead to hotwifing.

I have an incredible love for my wife and her happiness. I want her to expose her true self and feel comfortable with me in every way. When this occurs, I believe we can move forward in this journey. I have to say I get excited as things slowly progress. The change in her over the past year really excites me along with little things that show her becoming closer to me. Thanks for your response.

Mad Dog65

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mad Dog65 » Wed Mar 15, 2017 7:56 am

Mighten, Thank you for sharing your experience as mine is very similar to yours - we are moving slowly with me only recently sharing my fantasy and why but we are now talking about fantasy in general as a way to encourage her to feel comfortable and open to share hers with out fear and judgement and shame. Your last para " have an incredible love for my wife and her happiness. I want her to expose her true self and feel comfortable with me in every way. When this occurs, I believe we can move forward in this journey. I have to say I get excited as things slowly progress." could not have been said better! Well done and thank you for sharing

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PlayboyFan
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by PlayboyFan » Thu Mar 16, 2017 5:30 am

Mlghten wrote:PlayboyFan
You are spot on as to where we are at in this journey. We are not at the point where we are openly talking about hotwifing, and I believe it is because my wife is not comfortable with telling me her true feelings. She is definitely holding some things back from me. We are scheduling time alone away from our home to have quality, uninterrupted conversations. I'm sure you are right with her knowing my desire and wondering "why". My hope is that she opens up to me on a number of things she has not felt comfortable in telling me. When this happens, I think the conversation will ultimately lead to hotwifing.

I have an incredible love for my wife and her happiness. I want her to expose her true self and feel comfortable with me in every way. When this occurs, I believe we can move forward in this journey. I have to say I get excited as things slowly progress. The change in her over the past year really excites me along with little things that show her becoming closer to me. Thanks for your response.
She is definitely making progress. Keep it light for sure, occasional teasing comments about how exciting she is to both you and other guys etc., etc. Now that you have bit the bullet and voiced your fantasy to her, do not apologize for it and drop it. It is what it is, and from this point forward YOU are the one who has shown complete openness and honesty. Perhaps she isnt on-board yet and thats ok, but whatever you do dont apologize and walk away from your own desires after coming this far.

Based on what you have indicated so far, I think that as soon as she realizes how erotic you would find such an adventure, and that it would truly be the two of you together...she will want to make it a reality.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Thu Mar 16, 2017 9:20 am

Appreciate the comments and encouragement.

Lkncouple
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Lkncouple » Thu Mar 16, 2017 12:35 pm

Mlghten wrote:Lkncouple
Thanks for the advice. There are a lot of similarities in our relationships. Over the last year, my wife has widened our sexual boundaries. We have had anal sex, used a vibrator just like you two. My wife didn't really like the vibrator and like your wife says she doesn't like porn. She says it doesn't do anything for her, however, she gets really wet and we fuck every time. I believe her upbringing makes her want to say she doesn't like it however, her body is not in sync with what she says. I am working on getting her to open up with me in every way. This will allow her to be herself and tell me what she truely feels and desires. I like when she is in control.

My wife and I have not tried swingers clubs or resorts at this point and I'm not sure if that will ever happen. Thanks for responding and any additional advice is welcome. Let me know how you all are moving along.
The first time we went to a Swingers club we went to the Trapeze in Atlanta. I told her that it was a dance club but people can go in the back and have sex. I just wanted to go and watch. We have also gone to the one in Ft Lauderdale (She actually likes to go to it because of the dance floor). When I suggested Desire I said I wanted to try a nude resort before I died, it was on my bucket list. I said it was clothing optional, and if she did not want to get naked than she did not have to go. It is couples only, so she did not have to worry about anything. When I suggested it, we had the biggest fight in our marriage. She calmed down after a few days and said she would try it, but she would not get naked. After 3 hours there, she didn't have any clothes on, and asked when we could come back. We have met lots of people there, most are swingers and they are very friendly, but don't pressure you, but the opportunity is always there.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Thu Mar 16, 2017 1:41 pm

I will never rule going with my wife to a swingers club. I just don't see it in our immediate future. I know we would never be able to go to one near our home. If hotwifing becomes a reality, I cannot see either of us being comfortable with going to a local place. Out of town road trip is probably the only way it would happen.

I know I mentioned my wife as being conservative and she has changed her appearance and dress. He new outfits are very sexy, but still on the conservative side. Over the past year, she now wears a thong and high heels a couple of times a week to work. In our 20+ years of marriage, before last year I could count on one hand how many times she wore high heels. I cannot see my wife transitioning too much more in wearing more revealing clothing. Has anyone else with a conservative wife raised with a Christian background seen a dramatic change in their wife's clothing? Has she gone from never wearing heels, thongs, short dresses, low cut tops to the opposite. I'm asking because my wife has made a gradual change but I don't think her confidence and background will allow for more.

HWSage
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by HWSage » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:25 pm

My wife wants nothing to do with the sexy clothing business at all! Will not wear a thong or show cleavage. I can get her to wear a short dress, but only if she is wearing leggings. She is never going to change in that department, just not going to do it. Lived with her parents for most of her life and has a strict Christian family. She still can't believe she is doing other men while married, but hey, she knows now (thanks to my persistence) just how good it is. :lol:

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Fri Mar 17, 2017 6:21 pm

Mlghten wrote: I cannot see my wife transitioning too much more in wearing more revealing clothing. Has anyone else with a conservative wife raised with a Christian background seen a dramatic change in their wife's clothing? Has she gone from never wearing heels, thongs, short dresses, low cut tops to the opposite. I'm asking because my wife has made a gradual change but I don't think her confidence and background will allow for more.
Farmgirl dresses in what I would call normal attractive. This time of year, leggings and a top that comes just below her butt, or fitted jeans, not tight, just fitted to show curves. She only wears dresses or skirts when the occasions calls for it, think 'dress up'. In the warmer weather, she normally wears capris length leggins or jeans, sometimes as short as the top of her calves.
When she goes out to enjoy her hobby, she dresses the same and has for the whole time she has been doing this. She doesn't do the 'dressed for sex' or lingerie thing. It's just not her.
Now, don't get me wrong, she looks Real Good in what she wears and is quite sexy, it's just not all from the clothes.
A woman with he right attitude doesn't need to dress in revealing clothes to get all of the attention she wants.
Her one real thing that she wears to feel sexy is actually what she doesn't wear. She never wears panties, she doesn't even own any.
She has very firm breasts barely making 34B. She says she has pointers, not setters. :lol: She will often work on the ranch, supervising employees and meeting with contractors with out a bra. She will be covered up all proper but, if you pay attention you can catch notice of her 'high beams'. But, she mostly does this because it can get hot and sweaty wearing a bra around a cattle ranch. Its not really for the 'sexy' factor.

I would not at all worry about if your wife dresses revealing or overtly 'sexy'. Nice clothing that tastefully reveals a few of her curves is enough. The important thing for her to wear is confidence and an attitude that says she knows it.

D_Lited_HubWife
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by D_Lited_HubWife » Fri Mar 17, 2017 6:37 pm

I agree. I don't see my wife as the sexy clothes wearer, though she makes any outfit look sexy. All people are different though and I don't plan on pushing my wife to dress any certain way, but your wife may eventually see that she really enjoys "dressing up". She will discover that in time.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:10 pm

My wife and I met for happy hour tonight. Happy St Pats day!!! We had the opportunity to connect a little more over a drink and appetizer. We decided that we were going to make a date at least on night a week to meet for happy hour and get time alone. We discussed our friends pending divorce and both agreed we need to create a closer bond. She was impressed that I showed up with a nice card containing some of my feeling about her. We did not discuss anything related to hotwifing, but she did tell me that sometimes I tend to get too deep in conversation at the wrong time. I knew I did that and have to pay attention to this. It was a really nice time.

This evening when we were sitting in bed, my wife's friend text her and is having some marital problems. While texting her, my wife began discussing our relationship and brought up the fact that she has been really upset over me telling her I wanted her to sleep with another man. She said she felt like a "slut" and very small. I told her this desire doesn't make her a slut and I didn't think she should feel that way. I told her that I wanted us to always be able to express how we feel and our intimate desires with no shame. She understood And asked me how I would feel if she wanted me to have another women in our bed and she wanted to watch me have sex with her. I told her that if it was a mutual decision that we both agreed upon, I would be good with it and it is about enhancing our relationship. She said she had trouble with that fact that we made our vows in church and felt this went against them. The conversation ended when she said she was tired of the deep talking however we need to continue to talk about our relationship and what we both want. She said she was not mad and I asked her not to judge me in which she said she wouldn't. I asked that she keep an open mind as we move forward in our relationship. She said she knows she need to open up to me however she wasn't going to have an open mind (referring to hotwifing). She did say she needs to open up and has to change. We both agreed it was nice having an intimate discussion.

For some reason, even though my wife was telling me in so many words, "no way," I don't feel completely discourage that someday this might not happen. I believe she was speaking based on her upbringing and being viewed as a good girl. Maybe I'm off base, but I feel better just because we were talking openly about it.

BallSpanking
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by BallSpanking » Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:15 pm

Some wives simply will not allow themselves to be HotWives.
Others are dead set against it until they try it.
Schwiiiiing ... Thud! (Projectile erection becomes vicious uppercut KO!)

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