Just Beginning

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lonecuck
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by lonecuck » Fri Apr 27, 2018 11:06 am

Mlghten wrote:
lonecuck wrote:It sounds like you are making great progress, but I wonder how you'll feel if one day your wife comes home and tells you she had lunch and a makeout session with her work friend? I don't think she's going to be satisfied with anything less than romance. Hopefully you can keep it all in perspective and not take it too personally when it starts getting physical and it becomes obvious to you that it's more than sex.

The key will be for you to make sure to keep smiling through the angst, like a best friend who might be jealous, but keeps it on the downlow in support of her girlfriend. IME, it isn't always easy to do. It sounds to me like she's making the switch. You are going to see her smile when she talks about him and the way he kisses her, and it will hit you like a punch to the gut. You should learn how to smile through it all and celebrate her success, but at the same time make sure she knows it's nothing more than a turn on for you to share with her. If she gets any hint of negativity from you, she'll either stop or, if she's really into him, just stop sharing about it with you.

Good luck and thanks for the continuing updates. I'm really enjoying reading them and I'm pulling for you!
You have touched on a part of this process that I have thought about long and hard. No pund intended. LOL. One of my biggest concerns is not so much the romance and an emotional connection, but her shutting me out. I believe she is comfortable in telling me about him, because, I do get no only aroused but, am very attentive.

I think my wife will have to have some type of bond or emotional connection with the first guy she fucks as a hotwife. My focus is to remain connected with her as her best friend and keep our emotional connection/bond strong in every way. Saying this, I do know, how I think it will be and happen will be different that what actually happens. After all, the ball will be in her court.

Slowing down on my part is my way of not pushing and overwhelming her with moving into this lifestyle. This has been very hard, but almost everyday, when appropriate, I make small comments or suggestion about her and another man.

As for me, I cannot tell you the excitement I feel when thinking about her just flirting with another man. Thanks for following.

There's a fine line between keeping the door open and not pushing her out of it. Between a shared laugh, and making her feel like you are laughing at her. And between an expression of stunned disbelief, sexual tension and hurt. these elements of a cuckold relationship are all easily confused between partners, and really can only be overcome by communication and trust.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Mon Apr 30, 2018 6:53 pm

Update:

My wife had a long text exchange with her friend from work tonight. I am freaking out :o In a good way!!! I cannot explain what I am feeling right now but I’m really happy with our progress

This exchange started with casual flirting and went south rather quickly. After some back and forth, it turned sexual. I was right next to her the entire time and he has no clue of my involvement. They both agreed to delete the messages at the end because of what was said.

He talked about them working out together and him training her. He made reference to his snake and getting a blowjob. For a while she acted like it was innocent to me but responded with excitement. No doubt things are progressing rapidly. She told me she couldn’t believe she was doing this in front of her husband. We were both having so much fun.

Afterwards, she told me she now understands my love for her and how I want her to enjoy others but I’m always her main man. Yikes. Right before falling asleep, she told me she really enjoyed tonight, but nothing in reality would ever happen. I didn’t push her and told her I had fun as well.

This all took me by surprise, and I didn’t really have a raging hard on, but I felt so excited with a gut wrenching feeling. I want this for her and us really bad. I love this women so much and want her happy.
I’m sure things will progress between the two of them. It was so obvious she was into it.

Looking for some suggestions on how to proceed. Don’t want to be pushy however, don’t want to get shut out.

Hopefully, more to come. :D

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Tue May 01, 2018 8:25 pm

Things are rolling along now. My wife discussed all the flirting that went on today. Really exciting.

She has been pushing it off as just mild flirting and really nothing more. I laughed and enjoyed her take on what is happening. She admits he has other intentions, but tells me she is just playing along for fun. We talked a lot about the situation and i thanked her for iour open and honest relationship.

Tonight we had incredible sex. She told me while i was fucking her that she would let him do her. This was during the heat of passion. Will see how she responds tomorrow, but i am not going to push or bring it up. She is moving faster than i thought. :D

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Wed May 02, 2018 6:36 am

If he doesn't back out, she will have him. She knows what she is doing and she is having fun. The big plus is that she is beginning to realize that you are there to share it with her.
Never be pushy about what you want her to do. Instead, be encouraging and supportive of what she wants to do. Let her have fun in her way and on her time. You be there to pull up any slack so she has the time.

D_Lited_HubWife
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by D_Lited_HubWife » Thu May 03, 2018 6:08 pm

Mlghten wrote:Things are rolling along now. My wife discussed all the flirting that went on today. Really exciting.

She has been pushing it off as just mild flirting and really nothing more. I laughed and enjoyed her take on what is happening. She admits he has other intentions, but tells me she is just playing along for fun. We talked a lot about the situation and i thanked her for iour open and honest relationship.

Tonight we had incredible sex. She told me while i was fucking her that she would let him do her. This was during the heat of passion. Will see how she responds tomorrow, but i am not going to push or bring it up. She is moving faster than i thought. :D
Wow! Look at her go!

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Thu May 03, 2018 7:02 pm

Things are on fire now! We did a lot of talking tonight. Today, he spent a lot of time flirting with her. She continued to say it was mild flirting, but she cannot understand why he wants her (low self esteem). She initially told me that it would never happen and she was verbally arguing with herself as to why she would never follow through.

I told her that I supported her honesty with me and was having fun with this because there were no secrets in our part. I told her I trusted her completely and she said she trusted me. I love this woman! Cannot imagine my life without her.

I told her that it was obvious I really love her because I trust her having sex with another man. She told me that she hated me for saying that. I thought “OH SHIT”, and responded, “I know you don’t mean that” followed by a laugh. She started laughing and said no, I really hate you. With that she attacked me and we had incredible sex. WOW!! She rocked my world like when we were first married. Have not kissed like that for a long time.

In the heat of passion I asked if she was going to fuck him and she said yes. This is moving fast.

D_Lited_HubWife
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by D_Lited_HubWife » Thu May 03, 2018 7:14 pm

Mlghten wrote:Things are on fire now! We did a lot of talking tonight. Today, he spent a lot of time flirting with her. She continued to say it was mild flirting, but she cannot understand why he wants her (low self esteem). She initially told me that it would never happen and she was verbally arguing with herself as to why she would never follow through.

I told her that I supported her honesty with me and was having fun with this because there were no secrets in our part. I told her I trusted her completely and she said she trusted me. I love this woman! Cannot imagine my life without her.

I told her that it was obvious I really love her because I trust her having sex with another man. She told me that she hated me for saying that. I thought “OH SHIT”, and responded, “I know you don’t mean that” followed by a laugh. She started laughing and said no, I really hate you. With that she attacked me and we had incredible sex. WOW!! She rocked my world like when we were first married. Have not kissed like that for a long time.

In the heat of passion I asked if she was going to fuck him and she said yes. This is moving fast.
Wow again!

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:18 pm

She'll be losing that "low self esteem" ;) , you'll see a new confident her. :D

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Thu May 03, 2018 7:32 pm

Her number1 wrote:She'll be losing that "low self esteem" ;) , you'll see a new confident her. :D
Looking forward to that! She is a beautiful woman with a hot body.

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:36 pm

Nothing like adventure cock to make a wife feel good about herself. :lol:

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Thu May 03, 2018 7:39 pm

Her number1 wrote:Nothing like adventure cock to make a wife feel good about herself. :lol:
Indeed :D

Forgot to mention, she has kicked up the sexy in her outfits the last two days at work. Hummmm :P

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:43 pm

There you go, the girl clearly knows what she's wanting. Gotta love a woman like that!

InLimbo
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by InLimbo » Fri May 04, 2018 8:37 am

Wow! I'm loving this nice sexy progress. Look how far she has come.
They are both very slowly escalating then sexual tension.
Love it!

roadrunner
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by roadrunner » Fri May 04, 2018 1:31 pm

Mlghten wrote:She started laughing and said no, I really hate you. With that she attacked me and we had incredible sex.
Would she be willing to "hate" me too? :mrgreen: :twisted:
Two words that should rarely be used when discussing human behavior are 'always' and 'never'!

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Fri May 04, 2018 2:47 pm

roadrunner wrote:
Mlghten wrote:She started laughing and said no, I really hate you. With that she attacked me and we had incredible sex.
Would she be willing to "hate" me too? :mrgreen: :twisted:
Time will tell :lol:

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Mon May 07, 2018 3:47 am

Had a little bit of a slow down this weekend. Not sure how things went at work Friday, but it seems my wife and her friend slowed things down. Not sure if he is getting cold feet, but she told me he is concerned about me. If he only knew :)

My wife and i had several small conversations in between interruptions. She sort of dug her heels in that she like flirting with guys but could not go any further. I felt like she was tresting me and my reaction to these comments. Im still confused with her because she has given me so many mixed signals. We talked about honesty and trust a lot this weekend.

Overall, as always we had a great weekend together and enjoyed each others company. Will see what this week brings, but to me it seems she has taken a small step back. Hoping this is just because she is still processing things.

D_Lited_HubWife
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by D_Lited_HubWife » Mon May 07, 2018 5:57 am

Mlghten wrote:Had a little bit of a slow down this weekend. Not sure how things went at work Friday, but it seems my wife and her friend slowed things down. Not sure if he is getting cold feet, but she told me he is concerned about me. If he only knew :)

My wife and i had several small conversations in between interruptions. She sort of dug her heels in that she like flirting with guys but could not go any further. I felt like she was tresting me and my reaction to these comments. Im still confused with her because she has given me so many mixed signals. We talked about honesty and trust a lot this weekend.

Overall, as always we had a great weekend together and enjoyed each others company. Will see what this week brings, but to me it seems she has taken a small step back. Hoping this is just because she is still processing things.
That is completely normal! She is seriously considering it, but still feels the guilt/shame of a lifetime of thinking and living otherwise.

And yeah, you’re going to have A LOT or “vanilla” guys who will back based on you. Even if they know you are “aware” of what is going on and are encouraging it, they will freak. Just be prepared for that lol. But also must exercise caution when dealing with vanillas. They can get an idea the things are a certain way when they’re not. Just need to keep each other close at heart even when giving her the freedom she needs.

Her number1

Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Her number1 » Mon May 07, 2018 6:22 am

D_Lited_HubWife wrote:
Mlghten wrote:Had a little bit of a slow down this weekend. Not sure how things went at work Friday, but it seems my wife and her friend slowed things down. Not sure if he is getting cold feet, but she told me he is concerned about me. If he only knew :)

My wife and i had several small conversations in between interruptions. She sort of dug her heels in that she like flirting with guys but could not go any further. I felt like she was tresting me and my reaction to these comments. Im still confused with her because she has given me so many mixed signals. We talked about honesty and trust a lot this weekend.

Overall, as always we had a great weekend together and enjoyed each others company. Will see what this week brings, but to me it seems she has taken a small step back. Hoping this is just because she is still processing things.
That is completely normal! She is seriously considering it, but still feels the guilt/shame of a lifetime of thinking and living otherwise.

And yeah, you’re going to have A LOT or “vanilla” guys who will back based on you. Even if they know you are “aware” of what is going on and are encouraging it, they will freak. Just be prepared for that lol. But also must exercise caution when dealing with vanillas. They can get an idea the things are a certain way when they’re not. Just need to keep each other close at heart even when giving her the freedom she needs.
What he said.

LarrynDallas
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by LarrynDallas » Fri May 11, 2018 9:13 pm

Two steps forward, one step back. Relax, don't push and allow her to direct progress.

Permission, not pressure, coupled with opportunity. Give her time and tell her you always trust her judgement, you will love her regardless, always.

While this may be a lame idea, (worth what it cost you), could she tell her friend at work, (you said he was worried about you) that she and you talked and you told her she could flirt all she wanted and you would give her a hall pass to make out with him if she wanted, anytime, but that's all you would allow as her husband. (Hey, it's a start - might be all she would do anyway).

She could offer to let him call you or she could call you herself and let you confirm that on speaker for him to hear--If that would make him more comfortable.

Again, not sure it's a good idea, just a thought.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Mon May 14, 2018 5:20 am

LarrynDallas wrote:Two steps forward, one step back. Relax, don't push and allow her to direct progress.

Permission, not pressure, coupled with opportunity. Give her time and tell her you always trust her judgement, you will love her regardless, always.

While this may be a lame idea, (worth what it cost you), could she tell her friend at work, (you said he was worried about you) that she and you talked and you told her she could flirt all she wanted and you would give her a hall pass to make out with him if she wanted, anytime, but that's all you would allow as her husband. (Hey, it's a start - might be all she would do anyway).

She could offer to let him call you or she could call you herself and let you confirm that on speaker for him to hear--If that would make him more comfortable.

Again, not sure it's a good idea, just a thought.
Not at all a lame idea. I am playing things cool right now to give her some space. Your suggestion is not off the table for the future. Hopefully, we will see some progress this week.

Treborn
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Treborn » Mon May 14, 2018 8:58 am

What a great thread. Hang in there, you are very close. Would love a pic.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Mon May 14, 2018 11:30 am

Treborn wrote:What a great thread. Hang in there, you are very close. Would love a pic.
Thanks for following. Not ready for a pic yet, but not out of the question in the future :D

Fatboyplus1
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Fatboyplus1 » Mon May 14, 2018 11:53 am

Wow what a great thread. I recently read an article regarding how to turn you wife into a HW. It mentioned doing everything you have done so far. First thing was start purchasing sexier clothing. First two things it said to do was to buy her an ankle bracelet with hearts on it and then a pair of high heel shoes with an ankle strap. Then follow your steps.

With my wife she started letting me take pics of her (no face) and post them on a certain website. To post them it took 6 months before she let me. Now we take pics once every couple months. I tell her the comments she gets from two of her much younger followers and I think secretly she likes it but doesn't admit it. This morning she said it should make me mad to hear these comments. Told her it doesn't but instead makes me feel good to be married to such a sexy woman. Also it should make you feel good as well. Yesterday I ordered her a pair of heels and an ankle bracelet. She has some slinky tops she's worn out to concerts before. I've told her guys look at her etc etc. she's still not interested in sleeping with another man yet. But we've come a long long way in a year and a half. Not moving as fast as you but we are moving. Her problem is she isn't a real sexual woman. This could change though I suppose.

Mlghten
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by Mlghten » Tue May 15, 2018 3:44 am

Fatboyplus1 wrote:Wow what a great thread. I recently read an article regarding how to turn you wife into a HW. It mentioned doing everything you have done so far. First thing was start purchasing sexier clothing. First two things it said to do was to buy her an ankle bracelet with hearts on it and then a pair of high heel shoes with an ankle strap. Then follow your steps.

With my wife she started letting me take pics of her (no face) and post them on a certain website. To post them it took 6 months before she let me. Now we take pics once every couple months. I tell her the comments she gets from two of her much younger followers and I think secretly she likes it but doesn't admit it. This morning she said it should make me mad to hear these comments. Told her it doesn't but instead makes me feel good to be married to such a sexy woman. Also it should make you feel good as well. Yesterday I ordered her a pair of heels and an ankle bracelet. She has some slinky tops she's worn out to concerts before. I've told her guys look at her etc etc. she's still not interested in sleeping with another man yet. But we've come a long long way in a year and a half. Not moving as fast as you but we are moving. Her problem is she isn't a real sexual woman. This could change though I suppose.
I wish you the best in you and your wifes journey. Thanks for following.

bradisalpha
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Re: Just Beginning

Unread post by bradisalpha » Tue May 15, 2018 9:39 am

Mlghten wrote:Had a little bit of a slow down this weekend. Not sure how things went at work Friday, but it seems my wife and her friend slowed things down. Not sure if he is getting cold feet, but she told me he is concerned about me. If he only knew :)

My wife and i had several small conversations in between interruptions. She sort of dug her heels in that she like flirting with guys but could not go any further. I felt like she was tresting me and my reaction to these comments. Im still confused with her because she has given me so many mixed signals. We talked about honesty and trust a lot this weekend.

Overall, as always we had a great weekend together and enjoyed each others company. Will see what this week brings, but to me it seems she has taken a small step back. Hoping this is just because she is still processing things.
She is progressing.. working everything out in her mind. As was said, give her the opportunity and support her.. and have fun with her about her flirting. She is having fun with him and he is making her feel good about herself .. and sexually exciting her. She will flirt until she feels the urges and desires to take it to the next step.. which will not be far off now !!

Just let it flow and don’t put any pressure on her about telling him you know, or joining them. Let her play this out the way she is comfortable. There is always time for that later.

My thoughts...

Brad
Read my Bio: "Brad.. from the beginning" ...
http://ourhotwives.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=45313

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