New and still figuring it all out

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superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Sat Aug 04, 2018 2:08 pm

So happy for you both! Good luck!

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sat Aug 04, 2018 3:03 pm

superb101 wrote:So happy for you both! Good luck!

Thanks! It's a step forward for sure.
I even contacted the host of a party we want to go to asking questions too - wanted to check whether it was SM friendly.

On a roll ....... :up:

superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Sat Aug 04, 2018 3:12 pm

WOW!!! Awesome! What is SM?

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sat Aug 04, 2018 3:20 pm

SM = single male

superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Sat Aug 04, 2018 5:56 pm

That will be perfect for you! I bet its going to be tough to "take it slow" for you.

Kentros

Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by Kentros » Sat Aug 04, 2018 6:37 pm

What a great thread, I love how you and your husband are taking this journey together. Your communication is excellent!
viking43 wrote:I know it's a long shot, but nevertheless I'm serious - If you should ever come to Denmark, let me know. I'm allowed to play alone, and have done it before. - take a look at Sexy Adventures in the Land of Vikings. That was a fun and very sexy experience :)
Viking is definitely the real deal! I watched him and my wife put on quite a show ;)

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sat Aug 04, 2018 7:09 pm

LOL, yeah we were supposed to be waiting for the party in October but I am seriously thinking about us going to the smaller one they are having in (gulp) three weeks! It's with the same group and if it is smaller it might be easier for my husband who is not big on crowds.

I have been going over my short list of "interesting profiles" and found one guy that is already a member of that group. I thought I could start with him and send him an email mentioning that we would be at the party and would love to be able to meet up then.
My only concerns with him is that he lists that he is bi-curious and my husband is as straight as an arrow. Not sure if my husband would be comfortable with another man getting naked in front of him that wasn't straight. (I know, but I am the one that needs to try to make sure we avoid any potential issues).

Moving along.......

Yes I have chatted with Husbands Kandi in the ladies lounge - about the fun times had by all!
Viking43 made a generous offer to "take care" of my hotwife cherry - :shock: - I even have relatives in that part of the world but the timing is not right for us to travel.

Thank you Kentros for acknowledging that we are a team and taking this journey together. For me that is the most important thing of all. Throughout my husband's prostate cancer diagnosis, the treatment and resulting issues we were left with after, to now coming out the other side to a hopeful solution that will benefit both of us. We have been a team side by side and that is the way we will remain.

Now I have to jump on over to SLS and find me a man ;) after all my husband is counting on me!

viking43

Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by viking43 » Sun Aug 05, 2018 11:37 am

2inUPMichigan wrote:Viking43 made a generous offer to "take care" of my hotwife cherry - :shock: - I even have relatives in that part of the world but the timing is not right for us to travel.
If visit our part of the world someday, we would love to meet you - we like to meet new people, and this forum has given us the opportunity to meet and become friends with wonderful people. It doesn't have to involve physical sex, it's just nice to meet people with whom you have something in common - but of course, sex can be a possibility if everyone is okay with it :)

OZCPL
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by OZCPL » Sun Aug 05, 2018 6:03 pm

Good luck 2inUPMichigan you guys sound like a beautiful couple who think straight up and should have every reason to expect success. Have fun.

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sun Aug 05, 2018 7:30 pm

OMG - I am starting to get messages back!!! Gotta go, I have to answer them back................

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Mon Aug 06, 2018 7:40 am

Wow it is starting to heat up a little, hehe
I now am communicating actively with (let's see) three different guys and one couple and I have a couple intro emails out there that I sent that I am waiting for a response on.

The nice thing is that three of the four contacted me!
I am intrigued by the idea of the couple and they are actually geographically the closest but I would prefer to start with a man. I am not ready to jump into the deep end yet!

One of the guys is really flirty and sweet with great certs that say he is a nice guy, but he has no pictures. I haven't posted any pictures yet either but how do I politely ask for pictures? Or at what stage?

superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Mon Aug 06, 2018 5:50 pm

Id ask anytime you are ready but that's just me.

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sherulestherooster
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by sherulestherooster » Fri Aug 10, 2018 1:45 pm

2inUPMichigan wrote:Wow it is starting to heat up a little, hehe
I now am communicating actively with (let's see) three different guys and one couple and I have a couple intro emails out there that I sent that I am waiting for a response on.

The nice thing is that three of the four contacted me!
I am intrigued by the idea of the couple and they are actually geographically the closest but I would prefer to start with a man. I am not ready to jump into the deep end yet!

One of the guys is really flirty and sweet with great certs that say he is a nice guy, but he has no pictures. I haven't posted any pictures yet either but how do I politely ask for pictures? Or at what stage?
OK, true story. I wrote an ad for my wife on Craigslist years ago (somehow I think that a husband knows what's gonna trigger other males' interests). Responses went to her account. She got a flood of them, as I'm sure you have as well. She was a SAHM at the time, and I went to bed. She kept reading these responses and some of them were lame one liners but some of them were legitimate studs. She got really horny, walked upstairs and literally fucked me awake. One of our top ten sexual experiences.

When she got more serious, she set up the free account on SLS which at the time meant that she could only send so many messages a day (I understand the policy has changed now). No big deal, she's not in a huge rush. She then developed a vetting process. A few messages through the system, then if she liked their responses and pics (my $0.02, don't waste your time on anyone that doesn't post a photo), she'd offer them her naughty email. Email meant that she could do a lot more messages. If she STILL liked them, she'd offer her cell number and they'd sext. If there was still a mutual interest, she'd do a meet and greet at Starbucks. She had sex with one guy on a meet and greet, but that was the exception. If you go that route, I recommend you have a contingency plan, lol. The advantage of this process was that the men that were just looking to get laid would get weeded out. What was left were men that genuinely wanted to flirt and sext and have sex with a married MILF, with the long term goal of doing so in front of her husband.

We had a sexy photo session, again one of our top ten sexual experiences. I took photos of her in lingerie for the purpose of her profile on SLS. Her SLS interest skyrocketed. Highly recommend you post something accentuating your ~err~ assets. It was really hot, her saying things like, "ohh, do you think they need to see a photo of my ass now - is the lighting good, honey? Should I take my bra off?". HOT.

I don't think she paid much attention to the certs, because she had a Goldilocks-like, desire for a male with some sexual experience but not too much. Maybe that just intimidated her to be with a guy that gets around and has high marks for his talents. She mainly looked for a torso shot; few men post face photo.

I'm back to a wannabe now, but enjoying hearing about your journey. Best wishes!
Experience in a cuckold relationship, now downgraded to wannabe cuckold
http://www.sherulestherooster.blogspot.com

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Fri Aug 10, 2018 11:22 pm

Really like the description of the weeding out process.
It is easy for me to see already that some of the potential play partners will move along more quickly than others in the process.

Tried to get hubby to take a couple pictures today and nope, not good - ended up with one that looked like he was only 6 inches away from by ass - not posting that one!

I will post another update soon.

superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Sat Aug 11, 2018 1:54 pm

Im loving this thread! Thank you for sharing your journey.

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:26 pm

Update - got brave and asked flirty guy for "nondick" picture, LOL, and he said no problem - verdict = cute :D .
In fact we have a texting date tonight - he makes me smile and giggle like I'm a teenager.

It is interesting how each situation has a slightly different vibe to it.
If I want kinky I have an option for that, if I want playful and fun I have an option for that and if I want just casual FWB sex I have an option for that too.
I ask you what is a girl to do? Choose? Or ..... ;)

I'm not sure who I want for my first yet, still need to get more information.

Hubby is just going with the flow as I keep him updated frequency asking, "Which guy was that?" :lol:

BallSpanking
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by BallSpanking » Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:43 pm

Why choose when you can have it all?
Schwiiiiing ... Thud! (Projectile erection becomes vicious uppercut KO!)

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sat Aug 11, 2018 3:13 pm

BallSpanking wrote:Why choose when you can have it all?
Great idea ;)

"Oh boys... line up" LOL
Sorry a little silly tonight!

In all reality I told my husband that I don't intend to look for just one potential partner. I think the smart decision, after all I have read, is to have more than one to limit the possible feelings of attachment. Will there be fondness, of course, but I don't want to have any deeper feelings that could develop if I had "all my eggs in one basket".

So at this point I am narrowing down potential first time partners (and making sure I didn't overlook any) at the same time looking ahead to setting up for future structure of multiple partners. That probably makes more sense in my head :???:

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Des 31
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by Des 31 » Sat Aug 11, 2018 3:53 pm

2inUPMichigan wrote:Hubby and I will have our 20th anniversary this year and have a solid relationship. We are both in our 50's and I never thought this was something we would consider but our circumstances have moved us in this direction.
My husband had prostate cancer at the age of 50, and with all the treatments we are unable to have sex (penetration). Due to other health issues he is unable to take ED meds.

He loves me so much that he told me, "Just because I can't have sex anymore doesn't mean you should go without too." So we are exploring the option of a hotwife experience as he is very interested in watching me with another man. I have been reading a lot and started joining a few sites, lurking mostly. I signed us up to go to one event in a couple months to give both of us time to prepare and also time to back out if either of us needs to.

Him giving me this option has lifted some of the devastating loss of our sex life. However the worry over what this could mean for our relationship makes me nervous.
It's more complicated that the original fantasy but should work out in an otherwise solid marriage. http://ourhotwives.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=51289
Our hotwife history from its beginning at viewtopic.php?f=5&t=50057

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sun Aug 12, 2018 10:01 am

Thanks for the link Des 31

superb101
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by superb101 » Sun Aug 12, 2018 10:39 am

Any more thoughts on playing with the couple (man/woman)?

2inUPMichigan
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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Sun Aug 12, 2018 12:12 pm

superb101 wrote:Any more thoughts on playing with the couple (man/woman)?
I have been in contact with them - baby steps and as she said "we have all the time in the world"

They are only about an hour away, so not far at all. Trying to get to know both of them.
Not in a hurry and they certainly wouldn't be our first adventure.

I have not ruled it out, lets put it that way ;)
I think they would be a fun couple to explore with if I decide to go down that path.

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Tue Aug 14, 2018 8:04 am

Using hubby's veto power on one guy - he just doesn't know it yet! Seriously not a good idea to send a Dick pic to a woman who you haven't even had any flirty talk with and ask her if your cock looks yummy! Then he kept asking for nude pictures of me. This with hardly any talking and none of it flirty - no game dude and no respect, so a big no! (I had no idea it was going to pop up in my text until I saw the picture)

Would have been different if we had been flirty and had been talking in a more intimate way. Very limited contact with this guy. Don't even feel the need to go into detail with him so I am going to say hubby reviews the messages and he is using his veto. I told all potential partners that he had veto power- no surprise.

viking43

Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by viking43 » Tue Aug 14, 2018 1:05 pm

Like MrUtopia1 said, just tell him no thanks. You don't need to come up with an excuse - but you could tell him that you're sorry, but his tiny equipment is inadequate for you ;)

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Re: New and still figuring it all out

Unread post by 2inUPMichigan » Tue Aug 14, 2018 2:41 pm

Thanks for the input. You are both right, I just need to tell him this we aren't a good fit?

Do I really have to tell him anything? Or just stop communicating? New to all this still.

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