Threesome or watch?

[flstag]

New guy here, I posted some detail in the intro forum but basically my wife and I are entering the Hotwife world it appears. I'm excited but a little scared here. I'm sure many know the emotions I'm feeling. My question is do most enjoy watching and having her after over an actual threesome where all three are participating? I have some experience many years ago with threesomes and understand the dynamic a bit but I've never done one with the woman I love.

I'm more of an alpha even though I have some 'hybrid' cuck fantasies and feel like I'm losing control of the situation if I let them go at it alone first...I think I need to be in the mix a bit to start. I actually want to sit back and watch after we both get her going together. The guy we found and my wife are very new to this and I think my wife is worried about concentrating while pleasing both of us at once and he is nervous about another guy in the room, possible touching, etc. I can understand both their views so I'm trying to wrap my head around it. Maybe I should just go with the flow and after some baby steps after a few meets it gets more the three of us at once.

I'm even open to them meeting alone at times as I get more comfortable and enjoying her when she gets home after. I want to lick her after him and then reclaim her. I'm not into any humiliation and I think it would freak him out but I am turned on by her dominating me a bit. That's my slight cuck side I guess. Who knows maybe I go that way more after a while?

What's everyone's thoughts?

[BrunetteLover]

I could not imagine being in a room with another naked guy unless it was a shower in the army. Even that took getting used to.

[flstag]

I could not imagine being in a room with another naked guy unless it was a shower in the army. Even that took getting used to.

Yeah, that would be a deal killer. Her and I both want me to be there at least the first few times. It's how much interaction we both have with her together over taking turns that is the question. I've been in threesomes before, just not with the woman I love. I understand the dynamic. They are both new to this and possibly being able to perform and concentrate with the three of us interacting, I understand. I guess just go with the flow and see where it goes. If he can't handle me there naked most of the time, he's out. My wife and I both agree on that.

[Tryagain]

I am always present in the bedroom with them but i do not get involved at all. I try to be a fly on the wall so as not to interfere, allowing them to almost feel like they were alone. I also strip so as to "blend in".

Since you guys are new to this, I think this is the best option. however I question whether this guy is the best choice since he is uncomfortable already. Start out with an experienced guy.

[flstag]

double post.

[flstag]

You may be right he may not be the right guy but he has so many things going for him that he may be. He's a nice guy, clean/married, only in town about once a month, they've been friends from a previous job, attractive enough and has a huge cock she's curious about trying out (and of course I want to watch that). It's so hard to find the perfect guy so maybe we can work with him. I'm not looking for bi contact but yes, there will be incidental contact in a threesome. I'm very comfortable with my sexuality and my wife is too but he is coming off a bit homophobic and not comfortable with his. I don't think it's a selfish thing more than it is him worrying about being perceived as being 'gay'. I know she will eventually want us both pleasing her at the same time once she gets comfortable being able to concentrate on each of us together and for her pleasure too. Her pleasure is paramount. He's just a friend and 'stunt dick' but will get to fuck and enjoy the woman he has been hot for without any strings and then go back to his life.

[sw6]

We entered HWing expecting it to be about MFM
It was surprisingly comfortable for me to be in the room with another guy, pleasing my wife
She as it turned out had a hard time, didn't want to, focusing on more than one dick
So it turned into her coming home and instant reclaiming where she told me about all that happened

[Farmgirl]

You may be right he may not be the right guy but he has so many things going for him that he may be. He's a nice guy, clean/married, only in town about once a month, they've been friends from a previous job, attractive enough and has a huge cock she's curious about trying out (and of course I want to watch that). It's so hard to find the perfect guy so maybe we can work with him. I'm not looking for bi contact but yes, there will be incidental contact in a threesome. I'm very comfortable with my sexuality and my wife is too but he is coming off a bit homophobic and not comfortable with his. I don't think it's a selfish thing more than it is him worrying about being perceived as being 'gay'. I know she will eventually want us both pleasing her at the same time once she gets comfortable being able to concentrate on each of us together and for her pleasure too. Her pleasure is paramount. He's just a friend and 'stunt dick' but will get to fuck and enjoy the woman he has been hot for without any strings and then go back to his life.

I know we spoke a bit today in your intro thread. Tryagain above had some possible good advice, maybe you sit back and let them get comfortable for this first meet, just being there and being supportive until, or if, she askes you to join. That could be a very good way to start this relationship off .

[Natatude]

Our first sex meeting it’s all 3 of us, however hubby wants no male on male interaction but he will help hold my legs apart and lips apart and the switch places. However one lover I have that I really care for can’t get hard with Gary in the room. So he allows me to have one on one with him as long as he can come climb on while it’s still fresh afterwards.

[flstag]

I know we spoke a bit today in your intro thread. Tryagain above had some possible good advice, maybe you sit back and let them get comfortable for this first meet, just being there and being supportive until, or if, she askes you to join. That could be a very good way to start this relationship off .

I agree with you again Farmgirl and as in that thread, I like Tryagain's advice.

[flstag]

Our first sex meeting it’s all 3 of us, however hubby wants no male on male interaction but he will help hold my legs apart and lips apart and the switch places. However one lover I have that I really care for can’t get hard with Gary in the room. So he allows me to have one on one with him as long as he can come climb on while it’s still fresh afterwards.

Thank you for your input,

Yes, holding her legs open, helping open her gorgeous pussy, watching his huge cock enter her are the things I want at least eventually. When you say hubby holds your lips open, again, I'm very cool with that but doesn't that open things up for hubby touching his cock and male/male interaction. Not judging, just asking as I would definitely hold her pussy open, be open to even guiding his cock in, lick her from underneath as he's fucking her but understand those things I think about are a long term goals. I know I do want to enjoy her fresh both orally and fucking after which he probably won't understand. She wants that too and can be open and quite the naughty girl for me it seems so far.

[Natatude]

Yes they do tend to touch like that and legs and what not bumping into one another during a switch, but they are good with that. Just no sucking or fucking each other. I wish you and your wife the best!! It is so much fun!!!

[flstag]

Yes they do tend to touch like that and legs and what not bumping into one another during a switch, but they are good with that. Just no sucking or fucking each other. I wish you and your wife the best!! It is so much fun!!!

Thank you Natatude!

It sounds like you and hubby have a great thing going. Yes, I have no interest in fucking/sucking him but he is so homophobic that I feel that even me being there naked may freak him out. It's a shame as he seems perfect otherwise.

[Mustang1]

Thus is all about her pleasure. Discussing what you’re ok with is best up front. Then you can work on being comfortable as time goes by.

[mastiff]

If the other male is comfortable enough with your presence, it is very easy to simply sit back and enjoy and see if and when your wife wants your involvement.
For my wife she absolutely wanted me there for a number of reasons, not the least of which being that this was for us to share. The gentleman we played with was not comfortable with any male contact so I made sure to give him lots of space but he has grown less paranoid over subsequent visits.

[Blackjack4724]

Yes they do tend to touch like that and legs and what not bumping into one another during a switch, but they are good with that. Just no sucking or fucking each other. I wish you and your wife the best!! It is so much fun!!!

Thank you Natatude!

It sounds like you and hubby have a great thing going. Yes, I have no interest in fucking/sucking him but he is so homophobic that I feel that even me being there naked may freak him out. It's a shame as he seems perfect otherwise.

We have frequent sessions with other men where my husband is present. We play it by ear and if the other male is comfortable with my husband joining in, he will. Other times we have found the other male to be somewhat homophobic and chose not to have my husband join in. My husband has no desire to interact sexually with another man but just the fact that two men are having sex with me, the two guys might touch one another briefly but we have found in this lifestyle you have to get over your homophobic tendencies. Touching another person of the same sex occasionally kind of goes with the territory.
-Tammy

[Treat yourself girl]

Amy enjoyed a spit roast once. Taking her buck from behind while she sucked on my excited cock. While fantastic, I much prefer to sit back and watch Amy having all the fun. Once the buck leaves it's my go.

[hotfreaks]

I, personally, like a mix of both. Sometimes I want to participate. Other times I love to sit back and watch my wife and her guy go at it.

[Breakerhymen]

As you are new and dipping toes in the water go with how your wife wants to proceed. Its not just ypur fantasy. Communicate. Find out what she wants out of the experience. Go with that and adjyst as you see fit!

[Pufferfish]

Unless this is something the other guy has done before, or enjoys the power angle of doing this in front of her husband, I think that most guys struggle a lot with another guy in the room watching. It's awkward, like if someone was watching you urinate. There's potential performance issues. My wife has been with a handful of guys since we started, and only 1 of them was truly comfortable with it all, luckily he was her first guy. The rest of them we had to eventually work up to me watching, or struggled initially. So maybe a threesome would be more comfortable for the guy if he knew that was the plan, or maybe not. Ultimately it comes down to what you and your wife want to happen and he doesn't really matter, he can accept how it is or choose to opt out.

Personally, I've made the choice to not participate, although I would if it was something my wife really wanted to do. What I enjoy most is they psychological and visual aspects of seeing and knowing my wife is having sex with someone else. If I were to participate, I believe I would be distracted and would miss something. And I don't want to miss anything.

[dinoo]

In general, whatever (be sure whatever) my wife did with another man (or he with her), I loved to watch.
And my wife loved me watching.

But that changed after her dream came true: me sucking a cock.
Or better expressed, without any indication, a complete stranger (in what became "our" club) pushed his cock into my mouth.
My wife saw this and began to jerk his cock, hoping that he would cum in my mouth.
He didn't want to cum because as he said to her: "I want to cum while I'm fucking you."

This happening changed our lifestyle: my wife loved to watch me sucking cocks.
With her black lover it became a habit. My wife and I pushing his cock in each other mouth.
So she and I could watch it from very nearby, often only centimeters. A better view wasn't possible.
The first time it happened she wrote me in a mail:
"You gave him a real good BJ as it should be for a cuckold. I was a bit jealous while I was imagining the future: you sucking more cocks than myself. Unfortunately I know that most men aren't bi. I love to watch men playing with each other. Especially with their cocks. Then gives me the possibility to watch too."

So there was a rather big change but in general I stayed the watching or helping cuckold.
.

[Tryagain]

Unless this is something the other guy has done before, or enjoys the power angle of doing this in front of her husband, I think that most guys struggle a lot with another guy in the room watching. It's awkward, like if someone was watching you urinate. There's potential performance issues. My wife has been with a handful of guys since we started, and only 1 of them was truly comfortable with it all, luckily he was her first guy. The rest of them we had to eventually work up to me watching, or struggled initially. So maybe a threesome would be more comfortable for the guy if he knew that was the plan, or maybe not. Ultimately it comes down to what you and your wife want to happen and he doesn't really matter, he can accept how it is or choose to opt out.

Personally, I've made the choice to not participate, although I would if it was something my wife really wanted to do. What I enjoy most is they psychological and visual aspects of seeing and knowing my wife is having sex with someone else. If I were to participate, I believe I would be distracted and would miss something. And I don't want to miss anything.

In our experience no guy seemed to have any issue with me being there. In fact, almost all have removed their underwear and their cocks spring up and down with hardness. And they stay that way - maybe some do some self-stroking during things. Of course all were informed that i would be present but uninvolved.

But I am amazed at their ability to stay hard and fuck for so long right in front of me. Some can surely qualify for porn movies!

[rogerg]

My wife and I started in the lifestyle as swingers and we were always in the same room with the couple we regularly played with. Quite often I finished before the other guy and would sit and watch him with my wife so I was comfortable being in the room and watching when he started coming over (with his wife’s knowledge) on his own. He came over frequently and although I never touched him, my wife sometimes wanted to suck me while he fucked her. When she started adding other guys to her relationships I just watched and often she was on her own with them.

[Tank Turner]

My wife has always unequivocally explained to dudes she's seduced that I was going to be involved. We play as a team with me as the weak link due to biological changes. No dude as declined her invitation and she has carefully vetted them.

I am 100% straight. I take offense to the pejorative noun, "homophobic." I have no fear of homosexuals. It was created with an ulterior motive of casting a pall of irrationality over people. It's an offensive noun that should be purged from usage.

MFM sex is a normal and common women's fantasy. My wife has had it longer than she can remember. It's become more of a necessity than fantasy for us. Days of an assured 4 a night at long past. If I haven't been drinking, I can get two before hitting the twilight zone. My wife isn't yet warmed up after two. When that woman is operating off of an excess of testosterone in her system, she becomes a fucking machine.

When my wife is pulling porn star duty, the other dude and I work at opposite ends. My wife and I have no rules. Rules can limit sexual euphoria. We have an unspoken agreement. If she's performing a sex act on another dude or another dude is performing a sex act her, I will never interfere. If she's giving a dude a blowjob, I'll wait until after he cums before moving into position for one. If a dude cums on my wife's body, she'll rinse it off before resuming action.

After my money shot bank is depleted, I'll roll onto my side of the bed and head for the twilight zone. When exhaustion has sidelined me, she becomes the other dude's porn star. As long as he doesn't try anything degrading, she'll keep him happy.

Hard-on stamina is one of the reasons my wife likes young studs. They might not have sexual experience, but they can get hard many times.

[kort677]

I prefer to watch and wank