Advice - First time meeting someone

[CBushotwifecpl]

So after talking about this fantasy for years we have finally decided to meet someone. My wife has been interested but was quietly wanting something to happen organically. She really only talks about it when we have a few drinks but always interested then. She HATES the idea of online dating but finally agreed to let me make a profile on SLS to see what is out there. She wants nothing to do with chatting and admitted that from a picture alone she would say no to most people. She needs to know someone to really be attracted to them (personality matters). Last weekend we were out with drinks and she basically said to just have someone meet us out for a drink, she doesn’t want to see them prior.

So, I did just that. We are going to dinner on the 19th of March then meeting a single gentleman at 9 for drinks (of course after we have a buzz). I have told him this is only a meet and great so no experience of play. I have talked to a couple he has played with and he comes recommended. My wife did see his picture in a group of people I sent her and agreed he was the best looking. So, I haven’t laid it on her yet that we are meeting him yet. I am sending her to Florida next weekend for a solo trip for her to relax on the beach without the kids and pressure around her, it was her birthday present. She is an introvert so I assume she will love it. I think I will tell her then. I could not tell her at all but struggle with that idea.

I guess my questions are what advice can you give me about this meet up? Are there any off limits questions? She will be super nervous and I need this to go well. So for anyone that has been in a first meeting with an introverted wife feel free to offer any advice!

Thank you!

[Lookingforadventure]

I think your gut is right and you need to tell her in advance (your plan to tell her after Florida, or in Florida is a fine one). Maybe you can say that you have listened to what she's told you, and that you have heard her say that she is interested in the idea of hot wifing but doesn't want to chat in advance, or "date" online first. With that in mind, you've found someone that you think she'll like. You've vetted him by asking another couple about him, and you have told him about her. Be clear that you also said that while you'd like him to meet your wife, there is no expectation that anything will happen. Then ask what she thinks.

If she wants to bail on the meeting, cancel it. She isn't ready.

If she wants to know more, you can say that he's willing to chat with her online before March 19. That way they can get to know each other a bit.

If she doesn't want to chat with him, but is ok with the meet-up, then I would just spend time building the excitement with her. She'll be nervous. Assure her not only that she's beautiful, but also that you'll be proud of her no matter what. It takes guts to even meet the guy. There is no expectation of anything more. Then, fantasize with her a bit about things she COULD do if she wanted to.

As for what to talk about at the meeting, maybe just start casual. Where is he from, what does he do, what nice weather we've been having, how about those [Insert sports team here], etc. As conversation continues, I think you'll get a sense of whether or not there is chemistry.

I really think you can't script it from there. It really will be her call. When I've done meet and greets, I always gave the guy a hug goodbye (and sometimes a kiss if I was feeling it). That way I could see what the spark was. She might want to try that, but it really depends on what she's comfortable with.

I hope this helps.

[CBushotwifecpl]

I think your gut is right and you need to tell her in advance (your plan to tell her after Florida, or in Florida is a fine one). Maybe you can say that you have listened to what she's told you, and that you have heard her say that she is interested in the idea of hot wifing but doesn't want to chat in advance, or "date" online first. With that in mind, you've found someone that you think she'll like. You've vetted him by asking another couple about him, and you have told him about her. Be clear that you also said that while you'd like him to meet your wife, there is no expectation that anything will happen. Then ask what she thinks.

If she wants to bail on the meeting, cancel it. She isn't ready.

If she wants to know more, you can say that he's willing to chat with her online before March 19. That way they can get to know each other a bit.

If she doesn't want to chat with him, but is ok with the meet-up, then I would just spend time building the excitement with her. She'll be nervous. Assure her not only that she's beautiful, but also that you'll be proud of her no matter what. It takes guts to even meet the guy. There is no expectation of anything more. Then, fantasize with her a bit about things she COULD do if she wanted to.

As for what to talk about at the meeting, maybe just start casual. Where is he from, what does he do, what nice weather we've been having, how about those [Insert sports team here], etc. As conversation continues, I think you'll get a sense of whether or not there is chemistry.

I really think you can't script it from there. It really will be her call. When I've done meet and greets, I always gave the guy a hug goodbye (and sometimes a kiss if I was feeling it). That way I could see what the spark was. She might want to try that, but it really depends on what she's comfortable with.

I hope this helps.

I appreciate the feedback. She has told me this is the way she would like to meet someone. She is explained that first dates used to be very stressful back in the day so I know this will be too. I am certainly going to tell her while she sits by the beach in Florida by herself reading erotic novels (which will be exactly what she is doing). Of course, I would never force her to do it bc I know she wants to try this, just hates the anxiety of first meets.

I have messaged the guy and did my best to explain how she is. She has seen his picture and off all of them I sent she told me she liked his best. We are meeting him the following weekend after she returns from Florida so not much time to set it up. If she sends and flirty texts while in FLA after I tell her I’ll playfully send a pic of him for fun.

My kids will be out of the home that night so if things progress you never know. I certainly will ask her to walk him to the car if I can tell she had a good time and he is leaving. I just really hope this is exciting and fun for her, if so, this could be a big breakthrough.

[BT2]

I believe having a wife become a hotwife should be a shared activity, from deciding to do it, picking a person, contacting the person whether the wife does it or the husband, meeting a person, whether there will be sexual activity on the first visit or not, setting the rules, e.g kissing, anal, condoms, etc. (but not so many she needs a computer to keep track of them), etc.

It seems that you have gone ahead and made all the arrangements, and are now going to try to manipulate her in becoming a hotwife.

Every couple is different, so the advice you get on here may or may not be appropriate for you and your wife. But, given that, here goes. I think you should come clean with your wife when she gets home, and not plied with alcohol and not during sex. I don't know - admit to her that you got carried away, were thinking with your small head rather than your big one, but you would like to proceed but only if she is up for it. If yes, then start making decisions together. If no, cancel it and learn from the experience.

But then opinions and advice are like anuses - everybody has one. Also, in fantasies you control all the action. In real life there are two other people with minds on their own.

[DonVito4u]

First of all. Tell her ASAP that you've scheduled a meet. Can't stress the importance of honesty and communication from the very beginning. Anything less will set you back. Tell her ... the worst she could say is No. Even if she says No, she may change her mind as the day gets closer. Don't overreact or put pressure on her. Play it cool and confident. This is a step by step process. Not a porno fantasy. Sex will eventually come but only after you've laid the groundwork and effort of trust and communication. Consider her just going out and meeting someone a win. Don't rush things. If she wants it, things will occur naturally. Or if she loves you and is doing it for you... let it occur naturally.

[CBushotwifecpl]

I will let her know, even though she asked me not to. I am going to wait until she is relaxed on the beach this weekend. That gives her time to confirm she wants to meet someone for a drink with me. I appreciate peoples opinions, and everyone is different. It will interesting how it all plays out.

[CBushotwifecpl]

Well, we met last night! Like I said before, everyone is different. I texted her last week while she was on the beach and said, we are going to dinner then stopping for drinks. I told her a new friend was going to meet us and if she is uncomfortable with that we can cancel without a problem. She responded, I’m in.

The week was nerve wrecking, not knowing what would happen. Yesterday, she can down ready for dinner looking hot. She was certainly dressed sexy with a low cut top she usually doesn’t wear. We were having a great night and after some drinks and dinner, he showed up.

As a straight man I must admit the guy was very good looking. Dark complexion, ex college football player, 6’4”, and built very well. The best thing about him was he could carry a conversation, we had a lot in common and my wife was laughing and smiling. After an hour I could see his hand was on her thigh, she didn’t mind at all. We just kept talking and I noticed I wasn’t jealous, it was sexy.

When it was time to leave I asked my wife to be a good date and walk him to the car. It was so hot watching them hold hands as they left the bar.

She cam back about 5 minutes later, told me she aggressively kissed him and sexually bit his lip afterwards. He wants to see her either tonight or Friday and my wife is not hesitating.

This is unbelievable, so hot.

[mychubbyhotwife]

I guess my questions are what advice can you give me about this meet up? Are there any off limits questions? She will be super nervous and I need this to go well. So for anyone that has been in a first meeting with an introverted wife feel free to offer any advice!

Thank you!

A no sex meet up first is an excellent decision. That's what we do when we/she is looking for someone new. Maybe things can end up in sex and maybe not. Give your wife time to think if she would like to have sex with him after meeting him. Sometimes it takes a little encouragement to convince her into trying it. If the date doesn't go well try again.

There should be no limits on any questions. Everybody knows why they are there. It's a chance for everyone to set limits or no limits.

[mastiff]

Good luck and hope this progresses for you

[Lookingforadventure]

Well, we met last night! Like I said before, everyone is different. I texted her last week while she was on the beach and said, we are going to dinner then stopping for drinks. I told her a new friend was going to meet us and if she is uncomfortable with that we can cancel without a problem. She responded, I’m in.

The week was nerve wrecking, not knowing what would happen. Yesterday, she can down ready for dinner looking hot. She was certainly dressed sexy with a low cut top she usually doesn’t wear. We were having a great night and after some drinks and dinner, he showed up.

As a straight man I must admit the guy was very good looking. Dark complexion, ex college football player, 6’4”, and built very well. The best thing about him was he could carry a conversation, we had a lot in common and my wife was laughing and smiling. After an hour I could see his hand was on her thigh, she didn’t mind at all. We just kept talking and I noticed I wasn’t jealous, it was sexy.

When it was time to leave I asked my wife to be a good date and walk him to the car. It was so hot watching them hold hands as they left the bar.

She cam back about 5 minutes later, told me she aggressively kissed him and sexually bit his lip afterwards. He wants to see her either tonight or Friday and my wife is not hesitating.

This is unbelievable, so hot.

I'm glad it went well for both of you. Keep communicating with each other. And good luck with the next meeting.