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Out of bedroom

Posted: Mon Apr 29, 2024 2:24 pm
by aztd
The conversation a little far back she stated a couple objections. She was concerned about STDs. You think that can be overcome. The other thing was it's a sin. I may have missed an opportunity cuz then she said do you want to sin.
Obviously she's thought about it.
Anybody able to get past this with your wife? And if so how did you convince her?

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Mon Apr 29, 2024 8:22 pm
by MartasBoy
aztd wrote:
Mon Apr 29, 2024 2:24 pm
The conversation a little far back she stated a couple objections. She was concerned about STDs. You think that can be overcome. The other thing was it's a sin. I may have missed an opportunity cuz then she said do you want to sin.
Obviously she's thought about it.
Anybody able to get past this with your wife? And if so how did you convince her?
I don't know how to counter religious beliefs. Somebody is religious I believe it's a sin, I don't know that's a strong belief. Strict-minded Church girls would be difficult to convince.

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Mon Apr 29, 2024 8:22 pm
by MartasBoy
aztd wrote:
Mon Apr 29, 2024 2:24 pm
The conversation a little far back she stated a couple objections. She was concerned about STDs. You think that can be overcome. The other thing was it's a sin. I may have missed an opportunity cuz then she said do you want to sin.
Obviously she's thought about it.
Anybody able to get past this with your wife? And if so how did you convince her?
I don't know how to counter religious beliefs. Somebody is religious I believe it's a sin, I don't know that's a strong belief. Strict-minded Church girls would be difficult to convince.

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2024 6:44 am
by D+D
The religious thing is a tough one to overcome. My wife looks at it this way, I give her permission so she’s not cheating. However many believe it’s a violation of the marriage vows.

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2024 1:12 pm
by BT2
It is a tough objection to overcome. You have to know whether your wife's belief that it is a sin to be hotwife is really genuine. If you know that it is genuine, then to try to get her to do what she regards is a "sin" shows a disregard to her, and that what she believes is not important.

My first wife was a religious person - I believed genuinely so. She even believed going to a nude beach was a sin, because it allowed a man other than her husband to see her naked. Masturbation for the self pleasure was a sin. Cheating was a sin. She believed, however, that anything sexual between a husband and wife was not cheating and NOT a sin. It was pretty well anything goes sexually between she and me.

My current wife has been a hotwife for many years. We both believe that cheating is wrong, but anything sexual done with the other's prior informed consent is not cheating.

So, in answer to aztd's original question, I have no idea how you would convince her to be a hotwife, nor even if you should try.

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Thu May 02, 2024 9:57 am
by us2furu2
Hi..The religious aspect is something you and she will have to come to terms with.. Informed consent as well as acceptance and approval… It’s the only way I can see the two of you coming to an agreement to overcome it..
As far as being safe “ALL Partners” should have a up-to-date full panel STD Test Results available to share with one another prior to any sexual contact .. Condom requirements to start or a good thing, but as it becomes a steady relationship, they seem to go by the wayside sooner rather than later… Just human nature,I guess!!
I hope this helps..
Be Smart , Be Safe and Have Fun!!
Cheers
AndyC of Us2furU2

Re: Out of bedroom

Posted: Thu May 02, 2024 3:32 pm
by BT2
The previous poster adds a good point. Until a wife gets to know the guy and feels safe with him, a condom requirement is important. My (hot)wife dislikes condoms, and so she goes bareback, but only if it looks like a longer term relationship will develop. She has always required a condom with a new person. And for that matter, we both prefer a long term relationship with her fbs rather than "one night stands".

My current wife (of several decades) and I did not start off with any thought of her becoming a hotwife, and neither did I ever have that expectation. We got into this quite by accident. We did some erotic things strictly for ourselves. These included sharing stories of our fantasies, watching the occasional porn movie together, going to a club with nude dancers, us going out to an event or dinner with her wearing a skirt or dress but no panties, getting naked in our car, going to a sauna, etc.. We tried a bodyrub one time and she enjoyed it. The first bodyrub experience she wound up naked and having her breasts massaged. I was there and watched. The second visit ended in mutual nudity and her having a happy ending. The third visit they had intercourse. She has long since said that a hotwife activity which didn't include intercourse was not as enjoyable. And we have, over the years, paid for tantric massages, and we have even paid for an escort (with an escort, she can be certain her limits will be respected) when we wanted a sexual turn on within a day or two.

It is pretty difficult for a wife to go straight from monogamy to being a hotwife. It can also be difficult for a husband for the first time or so to watch his wife enjoy herself sexually with another man, or even to be told about it. On the other hand, if the wife, or her husband, don't enjoy it, why bother doing it?

Given your wife's reluctance, maybe try a slow approach which doesn't require her to become a hotwife right off.

But, as you will read on this Forum, one size does not fit all. (Or, opinions are like rectums, everybody has one.)