Our Hotwives

A place to discuss the hotwife and cuckold lifestyles
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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 1:10 am 
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wingman wrote:
Cuck_Steve wrote:
........
Cassie said that if we did this, she would be full on and she’d give me the humiliation and cuckolding I wanted. She also said she’d always love me and never leave me. But Paul is her man and I’m her cuck. Part of me does wonder if we will go back to normal again. None of us want that anytime soon. I suppose we will need to come up with a reason why Paul has moved in with us to people.

I’m happy to be their little cuck for as long as they want me to be.

Steve -
Is this a bedroom thing or a life thing? i.e. Does she still respect you as a person and love you as her primary partner.... and you guys have a different type of relationship? or, is this a whole-life all-in thing where Paul has truly replaced you in all manners of partnership? Regardless of which way, are you OK with that, and its potential outcome? If your not sure, and want to know, you might try something to find out. Not sure what would work best for you, but one way might be to assert your self as the man-of-the-house outside of bedroom matters and see how she reacts. Or tell her you going into a dark place and may need to back off this game for a while... see how she reacts. Then tell her it was a test, to help you out emotionally, and go back to whatever makes you comfortable.

Two more questions....
Outside the house, are you and Paul still buds they way you were before?
Do you and your wife go on dates to maintain your connection?


I wanted her to go all in on this, so Paul is the man of the house in and out the bedroom. I look at Paul as the man of the house as much as Cassie does.

We still hang out as buds but not as much, I think we both prefer our new situation that I’m his and Cassie’s cuck.

Me and Cassie do occasionally have go out together but again, not as it was before. She’s got her lover for that.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 1:14 am 
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petey boy wrote:
Cuck_Steve wrote:
To start with, he just still acted like my mate. But once he got comfortable seeing me as a cuck, he treats me like Cassie and has got into humiliating me and giving me my orders.



I am assuming you are accepting and adjusting to your new role. Do you find the humiliations arousing and are you surprised at how
quickly he took charge as he seems to have done.


Absolutely. Love my new role and yes I find the humiliation arousing. Love the way they are humiliate me and give me my orders.

I’m not that surprised. I knew once he got into it and saw that I was willing for him to have my wife, he’d be fully into it. I’m more surprised how quickly Cassie got into the humiliation part though.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 11:47 am 
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Do keep us updated!


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 12:37 pm 
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This shows where a lot of our cuck fantasies and desires come from.

To see one's wife fucked by another man takes us back to our childhood and the awesome curiosity we had about what our father was doing to our mother behind those closed doors. Of course as kids, as children, we had vague and very inaccurate fantasies about what was going on behind those doors. But it intrigued us to imagine in our minds what is termed the "Primal Scene", which is the name given to moment when we were conceived. The so-called "primal scene" is a moment that, logically, we can not ever have witnessed because it is the scene or moment, which occurred nine months before we were born, when our mother was impregnated by our father!

Second, the humiliation that one feels is also a harkening back to our childhood when we would be raised by our parents, with our father and mother giving us what were seen by us as orders. That's the "do this", "don't do that", etc., of our early life.

Now does this mean that the desire to be cuckolded is based on nonsense and that we should therefore not want to be cuckolded. No way. It just explains very broadly where that desire comes from. But, heck, it is wonderful to be cuckolded -- if you are into it. And I myself very much am into cuckolding.

But there you have two of the mainsprings of it: 1) the (impossible) desire to be present at the primal scene (which is when we were conceived); 2) a desire to be that child who was raised and ordered about by the father and/or the mother.

Cuckolding is the attempt to relive both these things (though #1 was not ever lived as such, so it is not a matter of re-living it: one wants though to re-live the fantasy we had when we were young of our father impregnating our mother to make... us!).


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 3:19 pm 
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EDAS wrote:
This shows where a lot of our cuck fantasies and desires come from.

To see one's wife fucked by another man takes us back to our childhood and the awesome curiosity we had about what our father was doing to our mother behind those closed doors. Of course as kids, as children, we had vague and very inaccurate fantasies about what was going on behind those doors. But it intrigued us to imagine in our minds what is termed the "Primal Scene", which is the name given to moment when we were conceived. The so-called "primal scene" is a moment that, logically, we can not ever have witnessed because it is the scene or moment, which occurred nine months before we were born, when our mother was impregnated by our father!

Second, the humiliation that one feels is also a harkening back to our childhood when we would be raised by our parents, with our father and mother giving us what were seen by us as orders. That's the "do this", "don't do that", etc., of our early life.

Now does this mean that the desire to be cuckolded is based on nonsense and that we should therefore not want to be cuckolded. No way. It just explains very broadly where that desire comes from. But, heck, it is wonderful to be cuckolded -- if you are into it. And I myself very much am into cuckolding.

But there you have two of the mainsprings of it: 1) the (impossible) desire to be present at the primal scene (which is when we were conceived); 2) a desire to be that child who was raised and ordered about by the father and/or the mother.

Cuckolding is the attempt to relive both these things (though #1 was not ever lived as such, so it is not a matter of re-living it: one wants though to re-live the fantasy we had when we were young of our father impregnating our mother to make... us!).


Or people just like to watch others boning down…


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 3:36 pm 
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That's probably a good reply. But... it is like saying that our lived life, our past has no incidence on our present life. None at all. Which would be rather strange. Very Cartesian, but not my way of seeing things.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2018 3:46 pm 
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Why would it be less fun? What I am saying is: THAT is why it is so much fun.

When I was 6 years old, I saw my mother with a lover. I don't mean that I saw them fuck, but I saw him seducing, talking nice to my mother (who was separated from my father). My mother was very depressed, a deeply depressed woman. She never smiled. Yet when that man was talking nice to her, I saw her smile. That smile shaped my life.

That incident (seeing my mother smile at that man) shaped my life in that I now love seeing my wife being fucked by other men. It makes my wife 'smile' deeply. It is a very intense experience for me when my wife has sex with another man. It is all the more intense that there are layers and layers involved as I relive a central and determining childhood experience.

This is why I find it so much fun. No, more than fun. It is a very exalting experience to me. Almost mystical to see my wife being fucked. It is not like reading a good book, or having a good cold beer or seeing a great sunset. No, it is an experience that goes way beyond the usual 'fun' experiences that we can have in life.

So... it is not really fun: it is utterly mind-blowing. If it were only 'fun', then that would mean that it would be only mildly interesting.


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Unread postPosted: Tue Jun 05, 2018 1:23 am 
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Any thoughts of him fathering 1 or 2 or even all of your children?

_________________
Great minds may think alike, but fools seldom differ.


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jun 06, 2018 10:14 am 
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When we were kids (4, 5, 6 years old) we were sexual bombs. Freud talks about children being polymorph perverts. Everything was sexual to us then. We had a sexual curiosity, a fascination for sexual things though our concept of sexual relations was vague. I can remember my playing with a girl cousin of mine when we were both five years old. We explored each other's sex organs. We somehow had divined that that part of our body was special, but we had no concept of the adult 'penis in vagina' type of sex. We knew though that we were doing something 'dirty' (we hid in a coal shed) and that it was fun because it was 'dirty'. "Fun" is probably not the right word here. A better word would be "fascinated", but in the very intense or intensive meaning of that word. That is, we were troubled by or about sex, yet drawn to it. There was something "sacred" about sex in the deep anthropological sense of that world, but a sacredness that seemed only to increase or become more intense the more we desecrated the sexual thing by playing with our sexual organs. We felt both ashamed and shameless in our little sex games. Again, we hid in the coal shed as we somehow knew that our parents would turn beet red mad if they caught us.

When I speak of the "sacred" or the "sacredness" that my girl cousin and I felt, I am not suggesting that she and I were aware of the almost primitive religious dimension of it all. We were quite simply INTO it (into that dimension), we were doing it, we were being it. We were not thinking any of this out (as I am doing here right now).

This is to say that our -- and my -- fascination with cuckolding is, in my mind, a return to that kind of perception of sexuality that we had in early childhood (4, 5, 6 years old). Seeing our wife taken by another man (or by another woman) has a huge effect on us. THIS is real sexuality. That is, it is not the tame, i.e. socialised sexual exchange of the standard married couple who kind of do "it" more or less out of habit. It is not that. What it is is this: a return to the sacred conception which, as children, we had of sexuality and eroticism. And again I must stress that our knowledge of sex was very imperfect when we were that young. We just lived it. We did not reflect on sex, eroticism.

So when our wife has sex with someone else, this is where we are taken back to: our childhood awe of sex, our wonder-filled fear of sex as of some sacred thing or activity. Admit it: adult sexuality is boring because it is so socialised, it is very timid as though it were under police surveillance (aka social surveillance) all the time. What we want -- what I want -- is to go back to the sacred and primal kind of sexuality that we experienced when we were young.


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jun 07, 2018 6:21 am 
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EDAS wrote:
When we were kids (4, 5, 6 years old) we were sexual bombs. Freud talks about children being polymorph perverts. Everything was sexual to us then. We had a sexual curiosity, a fascination for sexual things though our concept of sexual relations was vague. I can remember my playing with a girl cousin of mine when we were both five years old. We explored each other's sex organs. We somehow had divined that that part of our body was special, but we had no concept of the adult 'penis in vagina' type of sex. We knew though that we were doing something 'dirty' (we hid in a coal shed) and that it was fun because it was 'dirty'. "Fun" is probably not the right word here. A better word would be "fascinated", but in the very intense or intensive meaning of that word. That is, we were troubled by or about sex, yet drawn to it. There was something "sacred" about sex in the deep anthropological sense of that world, but a sacredness that seemed only to increase or become more intense the more we desecrated the sexual thing by playing with our sexual organs. We felt both ashamed and shameless in our little sex games. Again, we hid in the coal shed as we somehow knew that our parents would turn beet red mad if they caught us.

When I speak of the "sacred" or the "sacredness" that my girl cousin and I felt, I am not suggesting that she and I were aware of the almost primitive religious dimension of it all. We were quite simply INTO it (into that dimension), we were doing it, we were being it. We were not thinking any of this out (as I am doing here right now).

This is to say that our -- and my -- fascination with cuckolding is, in my mind, a return to that kind of perception of sexuality that we had in early childhood (4, 5, 6 years old). Seeing our wife taken by another man (or by another woman) has a huge effect on us. THIS is real sexuality. That is, it is not the tame, i.e. socialised sexual exchange of the standard married couple who kind of do "it" more or less out of habit. It is not that. What it is is this: a return to the sacred conception which, as children, we had of sexuality and eroticism. And again I must stress that our knowledge of sex was very imperfect when we were that young. We just lived it. We did not reflect on sex, eroticism.

So when our wife has sex with someone else, this is where we are taken back to: our childhood awe of sex, our wonder-filled fear of sex as of some sacred thing or activity. Admit it: adult sexuality is boring because it is so socialised, it is very timid as though it were under police surveillance (aka social surveillance) all the time. What we want -- what I want -- is to go back to the sacred and primal kind of sexuality that we experienced when we were young.

You make sweeping generalizations, assumptions and pronouncements that use plural pronouns (we…our) that include the reading audience — and your reading audience might feel differently. As any good therapist will preach, it’s better to speak in I/me/my statements.


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jun 07, 2018 5:42 pm 
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That of course is understood, i.e. I have said these things. Yet I do claim to speak not only for myself or of myself here. I may be wrong in what I say, but that is what "throwing out ideas" is all about. That's why thinkers think and write. When Nietzsche said "God is Dead" (which is a pretty huge generalisation), he did not feel he had to say: "I think God is dead". No philosopher or writer feels that they have to constantly remind people that their thoughts are, in the end, simply their own thoughts.

I have confidence in the readers here that they can make up their own minds about what I or anyone else writes or has said. The reader may agree with what I said, or agree with only some aspects or not agree at all. Still others may want to push further or in a totally other direction what I have said. All of this is fine.

By the way, what I say above owes a lot to George Bataille, especially his novel: The Story of the Eye. You may know his (Bataille's) famous definition of the erotic: "The erotic is the consent of life onto death". He did not feel that he had to prelude that pronouncement with an apologetic "I think". It is up to Bataille's reader to say: "Hey, now that's interesting!" or "No, I can't agree with that at all".

But thank you for reading my post on this.


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 Post subject: My wife and my friend
Unread postPosted: Fri Jun 08, 2018 1:51 pm 
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do you have any plans for celebrating the first year of Paul and Cassie together? What would you like to give the happy couple as a gift ? What do you think they would like you to give them? Is there anything that you could give them that would sweeten the pot for them ?
just some thoughts!

It sounds like you are very happy with the arrangement of Paul being the MAN of the house. Cassie is reinforcing it as well. Do you think Paul will move in altogether and stop leasing his apt. Then all the explanations would probably take care of themselves. Because any of your friends would probably assume something is going on, else, why would a single guy, seemingly doing okay for himself, move in with a married couple, who likewise are doing okay.


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Unread postPosted: Sat Jun 09, 2018 12:59 am 
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poppag wrote:
do you have any plans for celebrating the first year of Paul and Cassie together? What would you like to give the happy couple as a gift ? What do you think they would like you to give them? Is there anything that you could give them that would sweeten the pot for them ?
just some thoughts!

It sounds like you are very happy with the arrangement of Paul being the MAN of the house. Cassie is reinforcing it as well. Do you think Paul will move in altogether and stop leasing his apt. Then all the explanations would probably take care of themselves. Because any of your friends would probably assume something is going on, else, why would a single guy, seemingly doing okay for himself, move in with a married couple, who likewise are doing okay.


I would love to get them something to celebrate their first year together. Want it to be something special so any ideas would be great.

Paul is going to move in soon. He’s here almost all the time and all three of us want this. They look such a great couple and it makes me delighted that she’s so happy.


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Unread postPosted: Sat Jun 09, 2018 10:03 am 
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How about taking them out to dinner at a nice restaruant and do something special at the dinner. Maybe have a cake delivered to the happy couple and while the waiter/waitress are serving you make a toast to the happy couple, something like, To my very good friend Paul and my wife Cassie on your first anniversary together, may the future hold more wonderful time together, i will always be you faithful cuckold servant and promise to ensure your enjoyment, fulfillment and happiness in any manner you desire.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 1:48 am 
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The 6th July will be one year since Cassie and Paul first got together.

I think we’ve progressed far further than any of us imagined. It’s been great.

Paul is moving in with us on Friday and become the proper man of the house. I can’t wait to serve them every day.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 8:59 am 
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Hi Steve,

Good you all are having a great time.

I do not want to sound negative or hurt anyone, but you know this is not going to end well for you.
Sooner or later Cassie want to have children, and I think at this point, she doesn't want to have your children, but Pauls.
Then you also know this situation is not a good one to raise children in, so I think you will be 'asked' to leave.

Or maybe the next step in this is that Cassie wants to divorce you and marry Paul.

So my actual question would be, do you talk about this stuff with Cassie? What does she think the next step will be?

Again, I'm sorry if it all sounds negative, that is not my intention, but this keeps running through my mind

Cheers,
Marco.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 9:10 am 
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I should have said earlier in this thread, but children is not on the agenda. Cassie hasn’t really been interested in them and she’s said nothing recently to suggest otherwise.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 10:03 am 
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Cuck_Steve wrote:
I should have said earlier in this thread, but children is not on the agenda. Cassie hasn’t really been interested in them and she’s said nothing recently to suggest otherwise.


Hi Steve,

Thank you for your response.
Okay, she doesn't want children, well that makes this lifestyle a lot easier for you all.

Then only time can tell what this will evolve to.
For now it is all new and exiting for you all, lets see how it will be in a few months or years.

For now enjoy the ride.
I wish you all a lot of fun and I would love to read how this is evolving.

Take care.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 2:44 pm 
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Steve

Ignore the naysayers. I am in a very similar situation. I think so many of the naysayers dont seem to realize
that perhaps the new man, the bull, the dom, whatever you care to call it is as aroused by having a man
who to the rest of the world is successful and achieving is kneel and call him Sir. I would say for it to work
all three parties have to be clear and communicate. But isnt that what any relationship is really all about.
When i kneel and take Sir's cock i am aroused by the thought this firm cock is my gift to the woman i
adore. I too am caged and even the pain that arousal brings is arousing
I know not the cup of tea for many but confess i notice that even the most negative responses you get
are still reading and are aroused.
Be well

petey
( was Pete before Sir renamed me.


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Unread postPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2018 4:49 pm 
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petey boy wrote:
Steve

Ignore the naysayers. I am in a very similar situation. I think so many of the naysayers dont seem to realize
that perhaps the new man, the bull, the dom, whatever you care to call it is as aroused by having a man
who to the rest of the world is successful and achieving is kneel and call him Sir. I would say for it to work
all three parties have to be clear and communicate. But isnt that what any relationship is really all about.
When i kneel and take Sir's cock i am aroused by the thought this firm cock is my gift to the woman i
adore. I too am caged and even the pain that arousal brings is arousing
I know not the cup of tea for many but confess i notice that even the most negative responses you get
are still reading and are aroused.
Be well

petey
( was Pete before Sir renamed me.


Hi Petye,

I'm getting a little sick and tired when people who are having express there concerns immediately are called naysayers.
It looks like that is all you guys can say. A little bit of critic and lets bombard them to naysayers.

The only thing what I did was express my concern. Sometimes people do not see things because they are in the middle of it.
And then your reasoning, you are in the middle of the same thing, so it works. Well is that a guarantee that it will work for everybody?
Of course not. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.
Then also, you only talk about the cucks part, I here that more often "we cucks are wired different". Well that is okay, but also bear in mind that there are more people involved than just the cuck.

Did you know that most cuckold relations fail? For every success story you read on forums, there are 10 failures.
Is that a problem, no, everybody should do what they want with this.

I am not a cuck, I was more like a bull, or whatever you call it.
A story of me in short : There was a couple who had a good relation. I fucked the woman, man watched.
She said that she loved him more than anything. I talked a lot with the cuck as well, outside the bedroom. He told me there marriage was super strong now.
In the bedroom when he was away she told me she was planning on leaving him (with me if I wanted).
My reaction was that she told him she loved him more than anything. Her response was that was to keep him satisfied. In the beginning she liked this game a lot, but she doesn't want to do it anymore, and does not see her husband as a man anymore.

And I am not saying that this will happen to you or Steve, because there are also a lot of situations that this works for a very long time.

I hope you get my point.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 11, 2018 1:17 am 
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marco333111 wrote:
Cuck_Steve wrote:
I should have said earlier in this thread, but children is not on the agenda. Cassie hasn’t really been interested in them and she’s said nothing recently to suggest otherwise.


Hi Steve,

Thank you for your response.
Okay, she doesn't want children, well that makes this lifestyle a lot easier for you all.

Then only time can tell what this will evolve to.
For now it is all new and exiting for you all, lets see how it will be in a few months or years.

For now enjoy the ride.
I wish you all a lot of fun and I would love to read how this is evolving.

Take care.


Thanks. I am very excited about this and can’t wait to find out where this goes. I know there’s risks but that’s part of it.

It doesn’t bother me if comments come across as negative. I know you mean well and I appreciate people’s honesty.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 11, 2018 3:17 pm 
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Cuck_Steve wrote:
marco333111 wrote:
Cuck_Steve wrote:
I should have said earlier in this thread, but children is not on the agenda. Cassie hasn’t really been interested in them and she’s said nothing recently to suggest otherwise.


Hi Steve,

Thank you for your response.
Okay, she doesn't want children, well that makes this lifestyle a lot easier for you all.

Then only time can tell what this will evolve to.
For now it is all new and exiting for you all, lets see how it will be in a few months or years.

For now enjoy the ride.
I wish you all a lot of fun and I would love to read how this is evolving.

Take care.


Thanks. I am very excited about this and can’t wait to find out where this goes. I know there’s risks but that’s part of it.

It doesn’t bother me if comments come across as negative. I know you mean well and I appreciate people’s honesty.


Hi Steve,

Thanks again.
Glad you are really enjoying this. Hope this will last a very long time for you all.
Your not the only one who is exited about where this will lead to, I think many of us are.
Thankfully you know and accept the risks involved. This makes it a lot easier for you to continue.

And I'm glad you didn't take my post as negative. It is most certainly not intended that way. Only as a warning.

You three have fun, enjoy the ride.

Cheers,
Marco.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 11, 2018 5:24 pm 
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Steve

I am in a very similar situation. My wife began an affair with her boss last year. I didnt discover it until March of this year. Our home here in California has
a Casita* ( a california way of saying an in law apartment ) It has its own entrance etc. For friends and family he lives there, while in truth it is where i sleep
and live and he is in the Master bedroom with my wife. When they want privacy he tells me to go home and i cross the garden to my casita. In accepting this
arrangement i am acknowledging he is the Man of the house. She is and will always be my love and friend.
This isnt something i planned on happening, but i perhaps more than anyone am surprised at how well it works. In life i am not a passive male. If anything in
business i have a reputation of being the tough guy. I understand this isnt for everyone. However the three of us have worked out what works for us. She
and i have never gotten along better, i have discovered this submissive side of myself. I find it new and exciting. In this strange way i feel devoted to their
being happy and content. I can do this because i know they feel the same. It is a joy to me to see how my wife has bloomed and come into her own.
The rules of the house are his rules but rules we all have agreed upon.

Steve : a suggestion for the couple. i gave Sir and my wife a bolt so they may lock the door to the master bedroom should they desire total privacy.
Both loved it !


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Unread postPosted: Mon Jun 11, 2018 9:37 pm 
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love the story. looking forward to updates. when Paul is moved in, has Cassie and Paul decided on any rules for the living arrangement or do you think everyone will let nature take it's course in how the household will be??


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jun 13, 2018 9:27 am 
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That’s Paul moving in today now instead of Friday.

As for rules, we are going through everything tonight but I’d expect that it will continue as me serving them.


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