Sleeping Together or Sleeping Apart

[ErikaPeter]

We were wondering what are other couples’ sleeping arrangements, apart from nights when the wife is having sex with other men. This topic has been alluded to in other threads, but I believe that it has not been discussed in detail, at least recently.

At the beginning of our journey, my husband and I (mostly I) decided to start sleeping in a separate bedroom. If I was not with another man, I would spend half the night on FaceTime with my former boyfriends who were out of town or overseas. We would talk, listen to music, dance, and of course have cybersex. My husband would sleep in another bedroom. We would have sex about once a month, but I would not stay in bed with him after finishing. He would masturbate alone and occasionally have sex with other women.

This was a very important process for me. It gave me the emotional and sexual distance from my husband that I needed to become comfortable having relationships with other men. It allowed me to rekindle a sex life and a sexual identity independent of my husband. However, after about a year, we realized that it was starting to strain our marital bond a little too much. I made the transition back to sleeping with my husband (literally, not in the sexual sense). I started by spending one night a week with him, and then gradually increasing the frequency until we were back together every night. It was a difficult transition because I enjoyed having my own sexual space reserved for other men. In fact, one of my overseas boyfriends had begun referring to the other room as “our room.”

Now, I have come full circle. If my husband is away on business, and none of my friends is available to take his place, I have trouble sleeping. I need the physical presence of a man hugging me as I sleep.

[rlm]

Very interesting and unique perspective Erika. I enjoyed reading it.

[desertsub]

My wife and I almost always sleep together. The few exceptions have been when she has tied me to the bed in the guest room and left me there all night, which has only occurred 4 or 5 times. She has fucked other men in our bed but never let them spend the night.


It seems things are changing though. We are in the middle of a remodel and two of our three bedrooms are unusable right now. She said her ex-boyfriend (who she fucks every time he visits) might be coming for another visit. I asked her what we were going to do about sleeping arrangements and she said she already had that figured out. She told me to put a twin bed in the corner of our room (our bedrooms are pretty good sized) and that while he is here he will be sleeping with her and I will be sleeping in the twin bed. She said that if he likes the arrangement it will become a permanent thing whenever he is visiting even after the remodel is done! She said that it turns her on to know I will still be in the room with her, listening to them fuck over in my corner and always available for cleanup! She said there will also be times that she makes me sleep in the twin bed just because she can.

[msslave]

Been a long time since we've slept together, even longer (years) since we've had sex. Menopause killed that dead as a doornail. Wife also has a bad back and sleeps in a recliner in the living room, while I have the bedroom. Rarely get to even touch her and it still hurts. My release is occasional play with other men at naked parties. I'd guess most of the other attendees are like me and in a sexless marriage. I feel some human contact is necessary, yet my wife does not want to be touched or kissed, other than a quick peck on the lips.

That said, I enjoy having the bed all to myself, except for a cat curled up in the corner at the bottom of the bed.

[Socksmix8]

Even though I don't have sex with my wife anymore we still sleep together. I think it's important for the emotional side of the relationship. When she has other guys stay over they get the bedroom and I sleep in the guest room!

[cuckoldfan]

You guys that willingly don't have sex with your wife's I find a turn on.

[ErikaPeter]

Even though I don't have sex with my wife anymore we still sleep together. I think it's important for the emotional side of the relationship. When she has other guys stay over they get the bedroom and I sleep in the guest room!

We are the same way now. The year or so that we slept apart was important for us to have some emotional distance, which gave me the space to develop my hotwife relationships. On the other hand, we could not let it go on forever, because we would have lost all emotional connection. It was my husband who recognized that we had gone far enough, and made me start sleeping in the same bed as him again. We no longer have penetrative sex, but sleep together unless I am with another man.

[Socksmix8]

We are the same way now. The year or so that we slept apart was important for us to have some emotional distance, which gave me the space to develop my hotwife relationships. On the other hand, we could not let it go on forever, because we would have lost all emotional connection. It was my husband who recognized that we had gone far enough, and made me start sleeping in the same bed as him again. We no longer have penetrative sex, but sleep together unless I am with another man.

Glad to hear it's working out for you. It's the setup that works best for us as well and we still kiss and hug and even spoon but when she feels my hardon pressing against her she always reminds me not to get any ideas lol.

Maintaining our relationship is always the #1 goal. I need to know that she stills loves me and she needs to know that I still love her even if she is having sex exclusively with other men!

[Jerzeycuckhub]

You guys that willingly don't have sex with your wife's I find a turn on.

I'm in that category. Why does that turn you on?

[petey boy]

I have revealed this a few times elsewhere so why not here? Beth and i have been married four years. Almost a year ago she began an affair with her business partner. Six months ago she came to me and told me. The three of us sat down to work this out. He came to live with us. We have a home with what is called a casita attached to our home. ( We live in So. Calif they are called casitas here other places called an in law apt. ) I moved into the casita but we told friends and relatives he was going to rent our casita.
I sleep in the casita. His clothes etc are in the master closet. We have gone through several stages. Currently I am caged 80% of the time. He holds the key to the cage.. Two or three days of the month , he is out of town and i sleep with my wife. Usually i service her orally as they speak on phone or video chat. When he is here i often clean her after they fuck and then sent to my casita.
I do service him orally in front of her or alone on demand. He has taken me anally twice. Both times in front of her. The last time i was licking her clean as he took me doggie style. For whatever reason this works for us. In my daily life my sign of submission is the black silk panties, identical to hers, that he has ordered us to wear.
To see him take her thrills me. I never took her that way. By that i mean with such heat. Not long ago she confessed i never gave her an orgasm, he does.
I no longer care who knows. At my own firm I am a leader and a man. I am not a sissy! I am a cocksucker! I am his submissive.

[Squirming69]

I have revealed this a few times elsewhere so why not here? Beth and i have been married four years. Almost a year ago she began an affair with her business partner. Six months ago she came to me and told me. The three of us sat down to work this out. He came to live with us. We have a home with what is called a casita attached to our home. ( We live in So. Calif they are called casitas here other places called an in law apt. ) I moved into the casita but we told friends and relatives he was going to rent our casita.
I sleep in the casita. His clothes etc are in the master closet. We have gone through several stages. Currently I am caged 80% of the time. He holds the key to the cage.. Two or three days of the month , he is out of town and i sleep with my wife. Usually i service her orally as they speak on phone or video chat. When he is here i often clean her after they fuck and then sent to my casita.
I do service him orally in front of her or alone on demand. He has taken me anally twice. Both times in front of her. The last time i was licking her clean as he took me doggie style. For whatever reason this works for us. In my daily life my sign of submission is the black silk panties, identical to hers, that he has ordered us to wear.
To see him take her thrills me. I never took her that way. By that i mean with such heat. Not long ago she confessed i never gave her an orgasm, he does.
I no longer care who knows. At my own firm I am a leader and a man. I am not a sissy! I am a cocksucker! I am his submissive.

Sounds like a good arrangement that works for all three of you.

[OZCPL]

Yes Petey you really are a cuck but have a very interesting lifestyle. Thanks for posting

[H_K]

Sleep together when at our own home. We feel that it's important to stay connected as we take the cuckold journey together.

When Kim stays overnight (which happens 2 -3 times a week on average), I usually sleep alone at home but in the guest bedroom. Actually, it's more practical since I am responsible for cleaning and it's easier to clean the small room and make up the small bed. It's also psychological on our part since I give her up to Keith, I have no right to the marital bed, so to speak, even if she stays with Keith overnight. I take her over to his apartment and usually leaves around 11PM when all chores are done, to return between 6 and 6:30 to make breakfast and take my wife to work so quick cleaning of the smaller bedroom and not messing up the master bathroom is helpful.

When I'm allowed to stay overnight at Master's place, I sleep in the foyer of the apartment (rather high-end, but still an apartment with only 2 bedrooms). I have a camping sleeping pad and a sleeping bag stored in his hallway closet for that situation. My wife sleeps with Keith in the master bedroom. But usually Kim sends me home, preferring her privacy (boo hoo!). It's Keith who sometimes wants me to stay (for example if he needs to leave for a trip early and needs breakfast and someone to clean the shower after use, call for taxi, carry luggage down, etc.)

[SSQ]

I always prefer to sleep with my husband. I don't want any emotional or sexual distance. He's my husband and I love him.

Now, when his snoring means that he is at risk of being murdered in his sleep, I kick him to the guest room. Also, if either of us is having an overnight guest, the other sleeps in the guest room. Any other time, we sleep together. I love the cuddles we have together before we drift off to sleep.

[dickhurtz472]

I have revealed this a few times elsewhere so why not here? Beth and i have been married four years. Almost a year ago she began an affair with her business partner. Six months ago she came to me and told me. The three of us sat down to work this out. He came to live with us. We have a home with what is called a casita attached to our home. ( We live in So. Calif they are called casitas here other places called an in law apt. ) I moved into the casita but we told friends and relatives he was going to rent our casita.
I sleep in the casita. His clothes etc are in the master closet. We have gone through several stages. Currently I am caged 80% of the time. He holds the key to the cage.. Two or three days of the month , he is out of town and i sleep with my wife. Usually i service her orally as they speak on phone or video chat. When he is here i often clean her after they fuck and then sent to my casita.
I do service him orally in front of her or alone on demand. He has taken me anally twice. Both times in front of her. The last time i was licking her clean as he took me doggie style. For whatever reason this works for us. In my daily life my sign of submission is the black silk panties, identical to hers, that he has ordered us to wear.
To see him take her thrills me. I never took her that way. By that i mean with such heat. Not long ago she confessed i never gave her an orgasm, he does.
I no longer care who knows. At my own firm I am a leader and a man. I am not a sissy! I am a cocksucker! I am his submissive.

damn, this is way hot. i might like to try something like that. not sure where the wife would be, though.

pete

[PANTIES]

Next month will be three years since I was told to move into the guest room. After a lot of fussing and crying on my part I did what I was told. I didn’t like it at first but I’ve come to accept my position in our marriage. Her bed is for her and her lover.

Pauline

[Mark K]

We are in the middle of experimenting with intercourse denial, until we are on an upcoming vacation. We have been sleeping together, and actually fooling around more than we typically do, but only taking it so far (I am abstaining from intercourse or any ejaculation.) We are both thoroughly enjoying getting my wife off together, via oral sex and with toys, much more often than normal for us. Perhaps it would be interesting if I sleep the guest bedroom at the other end of the house after our modified sex sessions. I am already climbing the walls in some regards, and this move might amp up my heightened level of arousal even more.

[Thick and uncut 8+]

My wife and I have slept in the same bed for more than 21 years now. Even when we play and many times with our guy. The only time that we haven't is when I'm away for business. I can't see that totalling more than a month over our entire relationship. It's our escape from reality and a no judgement zone where we both support one another's desires. Only good stuff happens in bed!

[kort677]

we always sleep together but we have a huge bed and others are sometimes in bed also

[AgegapCuck]

Erika Peter…

“This was a very important process for me. It gave me the emotional and sexual distance from my husband that I needed to become comfortable having relationships with other men. It allowed me to rekindle a sex life and a sexual identity independent of my husband.”

That’s exactly where we are. I sleep in the spare bedroom and My wife enjoys the main room. She likes the space snd the fact it gives her distance from me. We usually have a cuddle at the start of a night but soon I’m sent away. At first I resented this very much but now having different bathrooms and beds suit me. My wife is then free to chat to lovers as she sees fit.

[Des 31]

Unless my wife has a guest overnight, she and I sleep in the same bed. If another man is fucking her, we have found it's best for the two of them that I sleep in our guest room.

When we had surveillance cams installed inside and outside our home, I had three separate cams installed in our bedroom so I could watch her activity and jerk off. The novelty of that wore off after a while, so I don't watch on my laptop (or phone if I'm away) as much as I once did.

[JRE2]

We slept together the first twelve years of our marriage, but we both had to give up something for that nighttime intimacy. Neither of us got much rest when we shared a bed as she is a night person and I'm up before dawn. She needed the TV on for background noise, and I can't sleep with noise in the room. If she had an occasional guest, they used the master suite, but if her regular boyfriend was visiting, he took over the guest room and they would always sleep together, even when he would stay for several days.

Ten years ago, we built our retirement home and instead of a guest room, we designed a second suite on the opposite end of the house and It was the perfect solution. We now get our rest during the hours we prefer, and either room is available when we crave intimate time together. The best part is that she has always been unconcerned about keeping things neat and likes to make a nest in bed with books, laptop, robes, pillows, etc, while I spent twenty-three years in the military and can't break old habits. I can make my bed and clear my nightstand in a few seconds. It works for us and we still love each other.

[Wooster]

We sleep together when she’s at home. We stopped having sex a few years ago ago, so it’s all strictly platonic, but it’s nice to have a cuddle-buddy (especially when it’s cold out).