If you asked her to stop, would she?

[Ares]

Why would you ask that she stop, especially in cases where you're the one who asked her to start (in most cases)? Or perhaps you'd like to completely control your wife's body and who she sleeps with? Typical scenario:

Please fuck other men.
I don't want to.
Oh please oh please oh please?
OK, fine, to make you happy, I'll do it. OMG, you were right, the sex is knock-my-socks-off fantastic!
Oh, wait, now I'm a jealous little twit, please stop fucking other guys.
But ... but ... I love you so much but I'm having orgasms like never before, can't we keep going?
No, I'm such a wimpy little jealous boy, I want to stop this. I've convinced you to endanger your body, your social status, and take another guys cock inside of you while I didn't have any physical risks at all. Now I demand that we stop. Isn't this "team sport" of mine just grand?

So ... short answer ... NO! But, for me personally, there have been times that I've stopped due to husbands health or special circumstances.

To classify your answer as specious is doing it a favor.

There are many, many reasons a husband might ask a HW to stop lifestyle activities. Not all would indicated he is a jealous little twit or wimpy little jealous boy. No more than saying no would make a HW a self-centered skank, interested in her own sexual pleasure over the future of the marriage.

Gottcha. Sorry for addressing a very common specific situation. Outa here.

[slowsteady]

Why would you ask that she stop, especially in cases where you're the one who asked her to start (in most cases)? Or perhaps you'd like to completely control your wife's body and who she sleeps with? Typical scenario:

Please fuck other men.
I don't want to.
Oh please oh please oh please?
OK, fine, to make you happy, I'll do it. OMG, you were right, the sex is knock-my-socks-off fantastic!
Oh, wait, now I'm a jealous little twit, please stop fucking other guys.
But ... but ... I love you so much but I'm having orgasms like never before, can't we keep going?
No, I'm such a wimpy little jealous boy, I want to stop this. I've convinced you to endanger your body, your social status, and take another guys cock inside of you while I didn't have any physical risks at all. Now I demand that we stop. Isn't this "team sport" of mine just grand?

So ... short answer ... NO! But, for me personally, there have been times that I've stopped due to husbands health or special circumstances.

I totally agree.

Anyone interested in this lifestyle should consider the fact that she has covered every feeling important to the question. I would consider it rhetorical except this one has an actual answer to it.

No.

..

[SRKnight]

No. I think once a HW has embraced the lifestyle like mine has, then she would not stopped. Even if she said she would, then I think it would be like many marriages with a spouse cheating and just not telling.

Age out before giving up

[Jezza2543]

When i expressed concerns about how far it was going, my wife told me to ‘relax and enjoy the ride!’ Eventually, when i said i thought we should stop, there was a massive row, followed by her saying ‘fine, ill finish it’. She, just moved it underground and kept seeing him behind my back. So to conclude, no - my wife was never going to stop seeing her boyfriend at my request.

[Tommy]

I once asked my wife this question. "Would you stop if I asked you to?" (I knew better than to actually ask her to stop--to test it. Also, I didn't want her to stop.) In complete seriousness she flatly replied, "No."

That was the end of the discussion. The topic was never raised again.

[Minnhotwife]

If I asked my wife to return to monogamy she would say that ship has sailed. We can’t take back what we have done and who we have become. Our relationship now is constructed around her sexual freedom. I can’t take back her freedom. That wouldn’t be love.

I agree. My wife is the same way and just said this today in marriage counseling. It’s part of her identity and there’s no going back to monogamy. It’s actually the opposite moving mor toward having more partners and deeper connections.

[Minnhotwife]

I have no doubts that if I asked her she would stop. When we first started this lifestyle years ago she told me she was going to stop because she thought she was hurting me. I had to convince her that "angst" was all part of being a cuckold and not necessarily a bad thing. So yes I no she would stop. I have thought about asking to a few times. But I don't think I ever will. This is a lifestyle that I know makes her happy. Makes her feel confident and sexy. I can't take that away from her. I love her too much to do that.

My 35-year-old wife says it would be difficult. I don't really want her to quit but did ask once out of curiosity. She no longer considers herself a monogamous woman, which has come about over the past seven years of sex with other men at my encouragement (and now, more accurately, approval). My asking her to do that at this point in our lives would be a very big "ask."

I admittedly didn't realize at the time I first suggested she should date other men that the reality is far different from my then-fantasies. That's something wannabes should seriously consider if they aren't sure they will be able to handle the realization that her personality and unrealized needs will be radically changed from that of a monogamous wife.

~ Des

Excellent post Des!

It’s very true the reality is different from the fantasy. It’s too late for us as my wife is not going back to monogamy and just said it again yesterday.

Her needs and desires are moving more towards poly than monogamy. I had no idea my wife would want to develop deep meaningful emotional connections with her lovers when we first opened up but this is where she is right now and is involved with at least 2 men who are polyamorous and partnered.

[mrandmrsgrace]

My wife and I took a break from the lifestyle for more than half of this past year for personal reasons. Before we mutually decided to get back into the lifestyle again just a few months ago, we had talked about the idea of stopping altogether. When my wife first began cuckolding me, I remember in detail the concern she had about hurting me, constantly repeating that we can stop this anytime and ensuring nonstop that I was still "okay" with this. Our recent discussion did include her being considerate about me and my feelings and needs. However, she made it clear that after two years of being pleasured primarily due to how well-endowed her sexual partners were, and both of us coming to terms with the fact that it is impossible for me to please her that way because of my lack in size, there was no way she could endure going back to the way things were. Knowing where things stood, she and I talked about it some more, and figured out a game plan to get back into the lifestyle, even though it would be drastically different than how we were going about things when we left it a year ago.

[LongTermHubby]

My wife made it clear some years ago that she would commit to staying in the marriage only if I refrained from interfering in her extra-marital activities.

[Acuckoldcouplenc]

1st I think after 15 years it wouldn’t be fair to ask my wife to stop however if I did ask to stop she would probably respect me enough to atleast talk about what’s going on and why I feel that way.

Acuckoldcouple.com

[Decman]

I'd never ask her to stop -- cuckolding me and having two men (or more) desire her has made her happier than she's been in years. If -- at some point -- she decides to stop, then that is her prerogative.

[SCBlknNsty]

With no disrespect intended, every response here has been totally wrong.

No one has mentioned the change leading to the question; many have talked about the dialog shared entering in, some have talked about the dialog once in...every and anything detrimental be it fear, jealousy, insecurity or whatever should be voiced immediately and updated well before you get to that question.

[R_H_NC]

With no disrespect intended, every response here has been totally wrong.

No one has mentioned the change leading to the question; many have talked about the dialog shared entering in, some have talked about the dialog once in...every and anything detrimental be it fear, jealousy, insecurity or whatever should be voiced immediately and updated well before you get to that question.

The issue of what would lead to the request being made has been discussed. Unfortunately, the same question was asked simultaneously on the Cuckold and Hotwife forum. It might be a more thorough discussion of this is in the Hotwife forum. Interestingly, the answers have been pretty diverse in nature in comparing the two threads.

[Ares]

With no disrespect intended, every response here has been totally wrong.

No one has mentioned the change leading to the question; many have talked about the dialog shared entering in, some have talked about the dialog once in...every and anything detrimental be it fear, jealousy, insecurity or whatever should be voiced immediately and updated well before you get to that question.

The issue of what would lead to the request being made has been discussed. Unfortunately, the same question was asked simultaneously on the Cuckold and Hotwife forum. It might be a more through discussion of this is in the Hotwife forum. Interestingly, the answers have been pretty diverse in nature in comparing the two threads.

Yes, this topic is found in both Hotwife and cuckold forums so it would be highly advantageous to both groups if you talored your response to the appropriate group or only responded to the group that fits you. Please do so in the future.

[Wisher]

^^^ Which was kind of the point of the two threads ... to get responses from the two groups.

[R_H_NC]

With no disrespect intended, every response here has been totally wrong.

No one has mentioned the change leading to the question; many have talked about the dialog shared entering in, some have talked about the dialog once in...every and anything detrimental be it fear, jealousy, insecurity or whatever should be voiced immediately and updated well before you get to that question.

The issue of what would lead to the request being made has been discussed. Unfortunately, the same question was asked simultaneously on the Cuckold and Hotwife forum. It might be a more through discussion of this is in the Hotwife forum. Interestingly, the answers have been pretty diverse in nature in comparing the two threads.

Yes, this topic is found in both Hotwife and cuckold forums so it would be highly advantageous to both groups if you talored your response to the appropriate group or only responded to the group that fits you. Please do so in the future.

Unless of course, I'm sure you meant, you have a point to make regarding a comment on either thread.

[JeffBingham]

With no disrespect intended, every response here has been totally wrong.

No one has mentioned the change leading to the question; many have talked about the dialog shared entering in, some have talked about the dialog once in...every and anything detrimental be it fear, jealousy, insecurity or whatever should be voiced immediately and updated well before you get to that question.

The issue of what would lead to the request being made has been discussed. Unfortunately, the same question was asked simultaneously on the Cuckold and Hotwife forum. It might be a more through discussion of this is in the Hotwife forum. Interestingly, the answers have been pretty diverse in nature in comparing the two threads.

Yes, this topic is found in both Hotwife and cuckold forums so it would be highly advantageous to both groups if you talored your response to the appropriate group or only responded to the group that fits you. Please do so in the future.

Unless of course, I'm sure you meant, you have a point to make regarding a comment on either thread.

I’m heading over to the HW forum now to wait for the hardcore cucks posting there to be similarly admonished to stay in their lanes

[Ares]

The issue of what would lead to the request being made has been discussed. Unfortunately, the same question was asked simultaneously on the Cuckold and Hotwife forum. It might be a more through discussion of this is in the Hotwife forum. Interestingly, the answers have been pretty diverse in nature in comparing the two threads.

Yes, this topic is found in both Hotwife and cuckold forums so it would be highly advantageous to both groups if you talored your response to the appropriate group or only responded to the group that fits you. Please do so in the future.

Unless of course, I'm sure you meant, you have a point to make regarding a comment on either thread.

I’m heading over to the HW forum now to wait for the hardcore cucks posting there to be similarly admonished to stay in their lanes

And they totally should ... I'm sure that everyone has probably made a post by mistake, not realizing what forum they were responding in ... but yes, I totally encourage folks to keep your posts in an appropriate forum, otherwise, why even have separate forums?

[4herpleasure89]

Why would you ask that she stop, especially in cases where you're the one who asked her to start (in most cases)? Or perhaps you'd like to completely control your wife's body and who she sleeps with? Typical scenario:

Please fuck other men.
I don't want to.
Oh please oh please oh please?
OK, fine, to make you happy, I'll do it. OMG, you were right, the sex is knock-my-socks-off fantastic!
Oh, wait, now I'm a jealous little twit, please stop fucking other guys.
But ... but ... I love you so much but I'm having orgasms like never before, can't we keep going?
No, I'm such a wimpy little jealous boy, I want to stop this. I've convinced you to endanger your body, your social status, and take another guys cock inside of you while I didn't have any physical risks at all. Now I demand that we stop. Isn't this "team sport" of mine just grand?

So ... short answer ... NO! But, for me personally, there have been times that I've stopped due to husbands health or special circumstances.

Saying it was his idea or trivializing his role in this ongoing decision doesn’t change the fact it was permission granted. Many things change over time, you just offered one. Continuing when permission is revoked means it is now cheating.

[Kycouple]

There is no way I’d ask my wife to stop. If she said she didn’t want to do it anymore I’d definitely agree but I know she won’t because she likes variety way to much.

[coupleoxford]

I have said to my wife on a number of occasions that if she wanted to stop then I wouldn't object. It isn't that I want to slow things down but it's my way of giving her that option and reassurance if she wanted it. But each time she's been quick to say "no way, not unless I wanted it". She makes it clear that she doesn't want to stop but she would if that's what I wanted.

[secretivecouple]

It depends on what it means for each person. It was my husband who asked me to try it (he was really persistent) but I would have stopped if he had asked one year later when I was really enjoying myself, because it was just a kink for us.

Now it's literally a lifestyle, part of living in a way that reflects our worldview, not roleplay. Like with my current boyfriend, the only difference between our relationship and any vanilla one is that I happen to be married.

My husband, I love him and I respect him, but I really can't see him the same way anymore. My boyfriend, like other men, gives me the urge to be taken, but I look at Lee sexually and all I want is to take him with my strapon.

If very dear childhood friend confessed their love for you and asked you to break up a serious relationship and start seeing them as a sexual mate, which you absolutely don't, would you? Could you? It's like that for us.

--Sharon

[desertsub]

It depends on what it means for each person. It was my husband who asked me to try it (he was really persistent) but I would have stopped if he had asked one year later when I was really enjoying myself, because it was just a kink for us.

Now it's literally a lifestyle, part of living in a way that reflects our worldview, not roleplay. Like with my current boyfriend, the only difference between our relationship and any vanilla one is that I happen to be married.

My husband, I love him and I respect him, but I really can't see him the same way anymore. My boyfriend, like other men, gives me the urge to be taken, but I look at Lee sexually and all I want is to take him with my strapon.

If very dear childhood friend confessed their love for you and asked you to break up a serious relationship and start seeing them as a sexual mate, which you absolutely don't, would you? Could you? It's like that for us.

--Sharon

Very good explanation! Thank you for posting that!

[Des 31]

After last night's conversation, I doubt it. Her decision is pretty much etched in stone.

[bubbajack]

The initial question completely ignores WHY a husband might ask his hotwife to stop fucking other people.

Since there is an infinite number of possible reasons why he might ask and an infinite number of possible reasons for her to consider in order to answer, perhaps we ought to specify some range of actual conditions which might set such a process in motion.

Sharon, the hotwife in secretive couple (see post above) has suggested one important set of possibly relevant conditions that could influence her to say No; but her post also does not suggest any reasons that her hub might ask.

Anyhow, the complex processes according to which marital relationships in "this" culture adapt and change do seem to be largely time-dependent. Sharon suggests that her marital relationship has involved her getting outside sex for too long to reverse the process now. I think Mrs Reese might provide an example of the opposite development - outside cock has been resorted to for too long and they needed for their relationship's sake to stop. Start again. Stop again (I think).

So maybe the duration of the activities is fundamental in some way ... maybe it gets to be old and too much trouble; maybe it becomes necessary to the enduring success of the marriage.

So I think the practical question a couple ought to entertain is: "What kinds of things have happened, are happening, and are likely to happen in this relationship that potentially indicate that our life together would be better if we try agreeing to limit her fucking to only us?"

I hope we get some more real input from real couples on this.

(As for Mrs Bubba and me, no such conditions have occurred which seem even to raise the question. )