A Cuckold's Diary - Chapter 17 "Missed It"

[Paul_Pines]

MISSED IT
by Cuckold Paul

** Yes, this story is true. Virtually verbatim. Comments welcome; flames cheerfully ignored.
And by the way, if you're going to tell either of us that our marriage isn't working, please save your breath. We're very much in love, and we love discovering new things about each other!

*************************************

From time to time, I've seen discussions about whether it is hotter to watch your wife get fucked by her lover, or to wait somewhere while she's out with him. I think I know the answer now.

If you want to feel the excitement, if you want a great show, if you want to have all your senses assaulted by the sights, sounds, and heat of your partner having sex with another man, then by all means watch them. I've done it, and it left memories burned into my brain.

But if you want to experience the pain of being cuckolded; if you want to know the emptiness of your wife leaving you, even temporarily, for the pleasure of another man's arms; if you want to feel the humiliation of the whole world laughing at you, even if they really don't know - then there is nothing to compare to your wife going on a date without you. And if you are at work while she is out, and cannot even sit and wallow in the sensations, the pain is deeper still.

I really would have hated everything about last Thursday, if it hadn't excited me so damn much. I'll try to describe what happened, but if you're looking for a graphical description of great sex, this won't be it - because I missed it. All of it.

Sally's lover, Ted, has had a series of meetings in our area recently. Since we usually drive an hour to meet him somewhere, Sally was excited (and nervous) about meeting him in our own backyard. As they discussed his upcoming visits, he surprised her by asking if she would like to do consulting work on his project. After thinking about it for a while, she agreed, and we had many fun hours anticipating her "sleeping with her boss."

As part of the anticipation - and the fun - she decided not to have sex with me as long as Ted's project continued. She said she wanted to save herself for him, and she liked the idea that he - and I - would know her pussy was for him alone. I got to play with her and help her cum nearly every night, but when she was done she would roll over and go to sleep, leaving me to jerk off looking at her pictures and fantasizing about her fucking him. She didn't talk about the restrictions a lot, but she did cum hard when she fantasized about seeing him. Two days before their date, she picked out the clothing she would wear - everything from her shirt and skirt to her bra and panties - and hung it on her closet door for me to see and go crazy over each day.

I work evenings, but I thought my schedule would allow me to finish work in time to join them. I figured they would have dinner together before I was done, and then I would meet them as they went back to Ted's hotel. I knew I would not be allowed to watch them fuck: several months ago they discovered that they were much more comfortable and much happier when they didn't have me as an audience. That resulted in me being banished to the hallway if they had a suite, or to the bathroom if they did not, but at least I got to see them before they started and to hear them while they fucked. The humiliation of being sent out of the room by my wife so she could make love to another man was intense - but it was nothing compared to last Thursday.

On Wednesday I found out that I had a meeting that I could not get out of on Thursday night, and I would be tied up until at least 9:30 p.m. When Sally heard about it she was not the least bit disturbed. In fact, she was happier than I would have imagined. "I guess you'll miss all the fun, then, won't you? But don't worry, you can still come pick me up when we're done." I was upset, and did not know how to cope with being shut out completely from the sex, but my wife seemed very pleased. She promptly nixed the idea of me helping her to cum Wednesday night, and didn't even let me see her naked. "I'm saving everything for him," she said with an evil smile, as she sent me downstairs to masturbate by myself.

On Thursday, Sally left for work early in the morning, before I awoke. On my way to work in the afternoon, I saw I had a message on my cell phone. It was from Sally.

"Hi, I'm at the mall getting my nails done. I was thinking about really dark red, because that makes a nice contrast. Talk to you later."

That message nagged at me all day. We hadn't talked about her getting her nails done, and if it had been part of our "game," she would have done it a day earlier so I could at least see what he would see. It was clear she wasn't doing it for me. She was doing it for him. I tried to work.

*******
Two hours later, when I had a break, I checked my messages again. The new one said only this:

"The color I chose - no joke - is called, 'The Long Kiss.' Dinner's at 7. Bye."

I tried to reach her, but she didn't answer her phone. I knew I had to go back to work and would not be able to call again until after 7, but she had instructed me not to interrupt their date. I hadn't seen my wife all day, and now I missed my only chance to talk with her before she met her lover. Even though she had called and told me what was going on, I felt left out. Ignored. Missing everything.

Work was damn near impossible. On the one hand, I hated what was going on. It was now after 7, and I knew they were together. I resented my work, and I resented them doing this without me. But I had to admit that I was excited, too. My wife was on a date with her lover, and she was very happy to be alone with him! As 7 became 8, became 9, I wondered what they were doing now. Were they still at dinner? Had they gone to his hotel room yet? All I wanted to do was jerk off, but I had to work and to concentrate on my work. I felt cheated - cheated out of my wife, and cheated out of the ability at least to masturbate over the thought of my wife with him. I hated it. But I was SO turned on.

Just before 9, when I was dividing my attention (poorly) between my meeting and feeling terrible about what Sally and Ted were doing to me, I had a revelation: THIS was what it meant to be a cuckold! My wife was on a date with her lover - dinner and sex. She couldn't wait for it, and she was willing to give up sex with me to be ready for him. She hadn't let my cock inside her in weeks, and she told him that. She went out to get her nails done for him - fingernails and toenails - because she wanted to look good for him.

I wasn't excited. I was hurt. I was missing it.

But I hoped they were having a good time together.

And when I realized that, I felt so damn small. It wasn't about me: it was about her. And him.

Them.

My meeting dragged on endlessly. When I saw that it would be nearly 10 by the time we were done, I excused myself for a minute. Running into my office, I checked my messages. The time was 9:10, and there was one new message.

"Hi, we're on our way to the hotel. Bye."

What time had that come in? I had no way of knowing. Was it at 8, and they were already done fucking? Was it just a minute ago, and they were just about to start? I didn't know, and I was not allowed to call them to find out. I went into the bathroom and tried to jerk off, but I couldn't get hard. Maybe if I had the time I could have focused enough on the exciting parts, but I knew I had to get back to work, and my cock would not cooperate. Thinking that even my own cock had let me down by not helping me get into what they were doing, I straightened myself up and went back to the meeting.

I have no idea what I did during that last 45 minutes. Apparently I didn't make a complete fool of myself because no one asked me if I was sick, and I wasn't fired. But I just don't know. I sat there feeling terrible, but with a new thought in my head: I'm being cuckolded now. Right now. By my wife and her lover. They said they liked it better when I wasn't in the room, and now they got to be together when I wasn't even in the picture. I really did hope they were having a good time, because I felt miserable, and stupid. But that seemed like the right thing to feel while my wife was being unfaithful to me.

The meeting ended at 9:55. I raced out of the building, and began driving to the hotel while I fumbled to get the earpiece from my cell phone in place. When I did, I checked my messages once more. This time it was Ted's voice. Even before he said it I knew he had already fucked my wife. He sounded relaxed, mellow... and satisfied.

"Well, I hope you're having a very good meeting. Things are VERY good here. You know, just a few minutes ago your wife said to me, 'I have nothing on now but my wedding ring.' And I said, 'Yes, but you have me on, too.' It was just a lovely experience. We're in room 517, lolling around in post-coital bliss. You missed all the good stuff, but we didn't."

I missed it. I really did. He just said so. What the hell was the room number? I listened to the message again, and again I didn't remember the number. All I heard was my wife's lover, calling from their bed, taunting me about what they had done together. And enjoyed together. Without me.

When I got to the hotel, I listened to Ted's voice again and actually wrote down the room number. I didn't need to be knocking on the wrong door at 10:15, and I did not trust myself to remember it even from the parking lot to the room. When I faced "their" door I hesitated, asking myself if I was ready for what I was about to face. I decided I was going to be embarrassed no matter how long I waited, so I might as well get in there.

I knocked, and Ted's voice asked who was there. When he opened the door, he and I were face to face, but he was naked. No attempt to cover himself, no shame, no apology: he was naked because he had just made love with my wife, and we all knew it. I tried not to stare at his cock, but as he walked back toward the bed he said, "We had a VERY nice time together," and I could not help myself. He was laughing at me (politely, of course) and his semi-hard cock mocked me as it bounced up and down between his legs. I hadn't been inside my wife in weeks, but he had been there just a few minutes ago. He was inside her. He fucked her. He came in her. And I missed it. I missed doing it with her, and I missed seeing him do it with her.

******
Sally was lying in bed, with the sheet pulled up to her shoulders. She smiled and said hi, then reached out her arms... to hold him as he got back into bed. He wrapped his arms around her, too, and I saw their bodies intertwine under the covers. Looking over his shoulder at me she said, "How was your meeting?"

"Terrible," I replied.

"That's too bad. OUR meeting was wonderful."

She spoke softly, gently, with a satisfied look on her face. Of course she did: she had just had sex. It was exactly as Ted had said on the phone: "Post-coital bliss." My wife and her lover, blissfully happy together.

She turned around, facing away from me and from him, but she pressed back into him so they were spooning. She said something which I could not hear, so I moved to the far side of the bed. They were cuddling together, and I could see that under the sheet, Ted was playing with Sally's tits. I pulled down my pants, sat on the floor leaning against the wall, and jerked off while they talked to me.

Actually, they didn't talk to me. They talked to each other, for me to hear.

Ted said, "It really was wonderful, wasn't it? We tried so many different positions, and each one felt better than the last."

"Mmmm," she replied.
I felt the blood rush to my face as I digested the ideas behind the words. They had tried all kinds of positions: all kinds of different ways for him to stick his cock in my wife's pussy; all kinds of different ways for him to look at my naked wife while he fucked her, all kinds of angles to turn each other on as much as possible. I was humiliated at the ease with which he related this, and angry that I didn't even get to watch, let alone participate, and so damn turned on that I pumped my own cock furiously as I listened.

She looked back at him, smiling, and I saw her left hand reach behind her, between his legs. As she began stroking him - not to make him hard, but just to be affectionate - the sheet slipped off her breasts. I saw both his hands on her, one on each breast, and I really didn't know whether to cry or cum. I had a tremendous urge to stop him - to say, "Those are MY wife's tits, get your hands off them!" But I knew I wouldn't, and I couldn't. Yes, they were my wife's tits, but tonight she had given them to him, and he was enjoying them. So was she.

They compared notes on their lovemaking. Ted said he went down on her to get her wet, and to his delight found her soaking wet as soon as he kissed her pussy. Sally reminded him that she never gets wet for me, and he asked me if that was really true. I admitted it was; we always use lubricant when we make love. He just shook his head in disbelief, and said, "She sure doesn't need anything to make her wetter when I'm with her."

Then Ted talked about how fast Sally came. After they had fucked for a while, she took out her pocket rocket and he held her and sucked on her nipples while she used it. He said, and she confirmed, that she came "almost immediately." She didn't mention that it takes her 10 or 15 minutes to cum when she and I do the exact same thing. I've never seen her cum that fast, and I didn't see it this time, either. I missed it. But I didn't miss the message: Sally came in Ted's arms. My wife orgasmed for him. She orgasmed WITH him. He held her, felt her, kissed her and sucked her nipples, until she exploded there in his bed. She gave him her body and her pleasure; the things promised only to me when we were married. This time, I wasn't even there to see her give it away.

Ted continued talking as he continued caressing my wife's breasts and kissing her neck and shoulders. "After she came, she got on top of me and rode me. I tried to hold back, but she was too good."

She was too good: she MADE him cum in her. She drew his orgasm out of him. He wanted to wait, but she fucked him too well. MY WIFE fucked him too well, so he came in her. He talked so matter-of-factly about it that I had to imagine the pleasure: Ted grunting, spasming, and squirting his cum into my wife's body. There was no passion in his telling; only satisfied, relaxed, "post-coital" mocking of her husband as he held her in his arms.

"You are a very, very sexy woman, you know," he said to her as if I had disappeared. "I am already looking forward to our next time together."

"Me, too," she replied. "Let's make it soon."

With that, she pulled the sheet off and got out of the bed, for one brief moment standing in front of me. But she quickly walked around to the far side of the bed, where Ted was now standing. I suddenly realized that the sheet over her had not been to protect her modesty in front of Ted, but in front of me. I was the outsider, the one who came into the lovers' room. She had covered herself when I knocked on the door!

They stood together and embraced. Ted dropped his hands to her ass, and caressed her cheeks as he drew her body to his. She melted into him. No resistance, no hesitation. No embarrassment. No regret. They kissed deeply, and I felt as if I was shrinking into the carpet. They let go of each other and Sally began to dress. Only then did I realize that the bra and panties she was putting on (in front of him! Why does wearing only a little seem more exposed than being naked?) were not the ones she had left out for me to see in advance.

She caught my eyes staring at her underwear, and instantly knew what I was thinking. "I changed my mind about these today; I thought they were sexier than the ones I had chosen." She had tossed away the ones she chose for me to see, and picked these for him. I didn't even know, and she didn't care that I wasn't even imagining the right clothing as I thought about them together.

"I don't know what the other ones looked like, but these are absolutely lovely," Ted interjected. Even the few words shared between my wife and me were not ours alone. Ted felt free to comment on her underwear, and to butt into our conversation. I started to get angry, but Sally turned to him and smiled. "I'm glad. I chose them for you," she cooed. I sank further into the carpet.

Sally continued to dress, and she and Ted talked about their work, their plans and their time in bed. Ted stood stark naked, and again his half-hard cock mocked me. He was naked because he had just been intimate with my wife. Damn, he had just been IN my wife. Of all the events of the evening, seeing him standing there, and his cock hanging there, and my wife so completely comfortable with the view, was the hardest to handle. He knew my wife, in the Biblical sense, and she knew him. Suddenly I had a little insight into how comfortable they were with each other, in and out of bed. The affection they spoke about was real.

When Sally was dressed and ready to leave, they kissed and hugged while I pulled up my pants. Ted walked us to the door, and Sally told me to say thank-you to Ted for giving her such a nice evening. I quietly said thanks, and he reached out to shake my hand, so I did. I shook the hand of the naked man who had just fucked my wife. I felt very stupid. But isn't that the appropriate feeling when you thank the naked man who just fucked your wife?

At home, we put the kids to bed and got into bed together. Sally changed into her nightgown in the bathroom, which I understood to be a signal that she was finished with sex for the night. She got under the covers and reached over to hug me. I pulled down my underwear and began to masturbate while she kissed me. I asked if I could look at her tits while I jerked off, and she said no, not tonight. Tonight they were only for Ted.

As I stroked myself harder and harder, she leaned into my side and whispered in my ear.

"We never realized how much it puts a damper on things when you're around, even when you're outside the door. We liked it much better this way. And it will be this way from now on."

"I can't sit in the next room and listen?"

"No, not anymore. We like being together - we really like it - and having you there gets in the way. We decided you're not going to be there anymore.

"But," she continued, "I'll always come home to you, I promise. Just some nights, I'll come home to you with Ted's sperm swimming around inside me. As it is doing right now."

I started cumming like mad, and my wife held me as I did. Not the way she held Ted, which was with her arms, her legs and her pussy, but she held me nonetheless. That's the closest I got to sex with my wife in the past three weeks.

The real sex? I missed it.

Cuckold Paul
newatthis22a@yahoo.com

[HerLittleGuy]

Wow again! That's just incredible, and so damned hot! I could actually sense your anguish at having been cut out of her sex life like that. Damn! I don't know how you can stand it. As a subby hubby, I can imagine it, but don't know if I could handle it were it to happen.

Thanks again for posting your (very well written) accounts here to share with us.

HLG