Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

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Bound2bmine
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Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Wed Mar 02, 2016 6:03 pm

Some of you wanted me to post this again. I actually added a bit more to it so you could get a better picture of that time in my life.

Be Careful What you Wish For
How I lost my wife to the lifestyle.

I met my x-wife when she was 18 yrs old. She was very mature for her age. I was 10 yrs older than her and divorced and we hit it off right from the start. Like I said she was very mature for her age a hot little thing with a very friendly attitude, she was the life of the party. She was a bit of a pot head, but had a good head on her shoulder. I would later find out that she was a bit adventurous, or slutty what ever you want to call it and by age 18 had already been with 30 guys.

So we dated for like 4 yrs and had one breakup, where she ran off with an X-boyfriend to Jamaica for a week. This is where my feeling of sharing her started I think. All I could think about was her and her younger x-boyfriend fucking her every-night. Like I said this is where I think my desire to share her started I think. She came back and we eventually got back together and married she was 23-24 by then. I was happy but I still had that fantasy of sharing her. She got preg and we had a child, the fantasy was kind of on hold while she was pregnant. After the baby was born I brought it up again she was against it at first but slowly warmed up to the idea.

By this time she was like 25-26 when she started playing with other men. It included men from a young guy who was 19 to older guy who was in his 50's and who turned out to be a sugar-daddy type for her. I have to tell you that was so hot. He would buy her things in exchange for sex. Just knowing that she was being used in a sense by an old guy was very hot to me. I have to tell you none of the guys knew that I was aware of her playing around. They all thought she was cheating on me. It was easier to find guys that way she did not want to do the bar stranger thing. So at that time I never got to watch. It was her playing on her own and me just hearing the details. This went on for 5 yrs off and on. I have to tell you guys at this point I thought I had it made a nice family a young sexy hot wife who was all about our family at home and fucking other men outside the home. By the way no one knew about our lifestyle not her family or mine. We kept it all very discreet.

At some point we had the idea that we should get a guy who could be a steady lover for her. A guy that we could both be friends with and I could watch and participate, as well as a steady lover for her. So this guy at her work who was a work acquaintance that I knew as well just happens to breaks up with his girl friend that open the door, he started talking more to my wife and we slowly brought him into the lifestyle. I have to tell you he was and may still be a cool dude. Easy to get along with. He was younger than her by 6 years, he was black which was a big fantasy for me and later found out it was a big turn on for her as well. So he starts hanging out as a friend of the family and that’s how everyone saw him. Slowly we get him into the lifestyle. He would come over to our house when our child was at grandmas and she would go to his place other times. I thought I was in heaven. You guys that have seen the pictures they were so incredibly hot together. I had never seen my wife react like she did to this guy. Again for those that have seen the pictures it was so incredible hot. The way he fucked her the way he took over her was incredibly hot and shocking in a good way to me. I have to admit however that it did worry me a bit. With in 3 months it started to get a little out of control he was fucking her 3-4 times a week. She totally started to fall like under a spell that once again was exciting but worried me. She even started to be a bit submissive to him. Most of times she was at his place because we had a child. She would leave work go to his place and come home after (again in retrospect probably not a good idea).


So by this point I have a young wife and mother that is getting fucked by another man 3-4 times a week and I'm hardly getting any sex at all. She was on the pill so he was cumin inside her sometimes several times a night. If she wouldn’t have been on the pill she would have been pregnant right away as much cum as he was dropping inside her. Keep in mind 3-4 times a week many night twice a night, that's a whole lot of another mans cum inside her.

Then I start to see a change in her she starts to become more distant. I was getting no sex and when she would give me a BJ she would spit me out but she always swallowed him. I asked once why she spit mine out she said your cum taste sour and his taste sweet. So more and more she finds things to fight about to the point that she tell me one day I am addicted to him I cant do with out him. Then she said you got us into this lifestyle you opened the door and now I'm in love with him I cant be with out him. We separate and within six months while we are separated but not divorced she got preg by him. We divorced like 8 months later she had a big preg belly when we had our court date for the divorce. It was kind of humiliating

So what is the lesson here. This life is dangerous make sure you go into it with eyes wide open.
Be careful of wife having a steady boyfriend with out having any rules.

So I wanted to add this as well it was on the original story when it was posted before.
This is a conversation I had with her about our past not to long ago. I asked her.

ME: So what was the different. We know emotions came after. Was the sex better?
HER: Your right I didn't fall in love right away, but honestly I absolutely enjoyed the sex, i cant say exactly why, it was just so good. 
So yes to be honest the sex was better. Sorry.
ME: Was the black thing a turn on for you.
HER: Yes, the black thing was a turn on. Can't explain the black thing.
I don’t know I just like the contrast if our skin together.
ME: So you didn't say if you were always attracted to black men?
HER: No not always attracted to black dudes not at all. But you saw us together can you blame me.


I also asked her this. It was interesting never thought of myself as submissive.

ME:Did you think of me as submissive in any way? Because in regular life I don't like to be pushed around.
HER: Yeah, I could see you being submissive.
ME: OK wow, submissive how?
HER: I just meant that I could see you enjoying a sexually submissive relationship. I really don't know though.
Last edited by Bound2bmine on Tue Mar 08, 2016 5:56 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Zona

Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Zona » Wed Mar 02, 2016 10:30 pm

Thanks for posting this again B2bm.

It is truly an excellent rendition of what can happen when things go wrong.

SO many people here think everything is always sunshine and rainbows. They need a 2 X 4 between the eyes every once in awhile so they will know that isn't always the case.

Your story does that.

I've said it before many times that it should be mandatory reading by everyone contemplating entering the lifestyle. I'm not saying that to stop them. I'm saying that it is important that they see both sides.

May I ask the time frame on this? How long ago did you divorce? And are they still together?

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Thu Mar 03, 2016 7:32 am

We have been divorced a while now. Yes they are still together.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by norbertrichard » Sat Jun 04, 2016 5:53 am

Your story probably hits the spot with some people, and i'm sure that most love it, accept for the outcome.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by CeeTee » Mon Jun 13, 2016 1:45 am

I think that from the beggining she had THAT X FACTOR to be a someone elses girl, remember that she ran away to jamaica with her ex? Maybe that was some kind of sign which is now easy to recognize but back then...maybe not

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Tue Jun 14, 2016 5:38 pm

CeeTee wrote:I think that from the beggining she had THAT X FACTOR to be a someone elses girl, remember that she ran away to jamaica with her ex? Maybe that was some kind of sign which is now easy to recognize but back then...maybe not
So i get that. Be we were married for 7 yrs after that.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Wed Jun 15, 2016 5:55 pm

elgordo wrote:7 years is a long time for a relationship.
You know when i count the time we were separated and not divorced we were married longer that 7 yrs.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Thu Jun 16, 2016 3:46 pm

elgordo wrote:Are you in a new relationship? Does it include hotwifery or once but twice shy? I wonder can you even go back into a similar relationship with someone else being burnt like that?
Have been in a few relationships nothing serious and nothing about wife sharing. Would I do it again? With the right person yeah I think so. I love the lifestyle.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by jc6morw » Thu Jun 16, 2016 4:21 pm

Now that you're divorced from her, do you ever think about her as your hot desirable ex-wife that another man is fucking, and you don't get to fuck at all. Do you get turned looking at it from that perspective?

I know they are still together, but do you think she misses the fun of having some control (limiting/withholding sex) over submissive you, a man with the desire to sexually worship her.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Thu Jun 16, 2016 5:47 pm

jc6morw wrote:Now that you're divorced from her, do you ever think about her as your hot desirable ex-wife that another man is fucking, and you don't get to fuck at all. Do you get turned looking at it from that perspective?

I know they are still together, but do you think she misses the fun of having some control (limiting/withholding sex) over submissive you, a man with the desire to sexually worship her.
Yes I think about it all the time it was super-hot while it lasted. Why do you think I'm still here talking about it. Just not much fun when the end kicked in and she left. not only was it the lost of love and a marriage but the withdrawals from the lifestyle. Like I say this lifestyle is like a drug.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by maedhros21 » Sun Jun 19, 2016 10:07 am

I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Zona » Sun Jun 19, 2016 10:14 pm

maedhros21 wrote:I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.
You are kidding, right?

The guy's wife dumps him for a BBC and somehow Bound2bmine is guilty of "Truly truly selfish thinking on (his) part"???

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by maedhros21 » Sun Jun 19, 2016 11:58 pm

Zona wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.
You are kidding, right?

The guy's wife dumps him for a BBC and somehow Bound2bmine is guilty of "Truly truly selfish thinking on (his) part"???
Entering into a lifestyle that could threaten the stability of your family is selfish thinking how can you call it anything else.....like I said when they chose to do this he was getting his kinks satisfied, she was getting her orgasms but what did the child get out of it except a broken home. I'm sorry but any cuckold who loses their wife to another man is not a victim, it's a gamble when you allow your wife to play with another man and he lost. Another example of selfishness on both their parts is the nights she would leave the house to be with the boyfriend, that was time stolen away from their child and since he sanctioned it he is just as selfish as her.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Hotwifeok » Mon Jun 20, 2016 8:55 am

maedhros21 wrote:
Zona wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.
You are kidding, right?

The guy's wife dumps him for a BBC and somehow Bound2bmine is guilty of "Truly truly selfish thinking on (his) part"???
Entering into a lifestyle that could threaten the stability of your family is selfish thinking how can you call it anything else.....like I said when they chose to do this he was getting his kinks satisfied, she was getting her orgasms but what did the child get out of it except a broken home. I'm sorry but any cuckold who loses their wife to another man is not a victim, it's a gamble when you allow your wife to play with another man and he lost. Another example of selfishness on both their parts is the nights she would leave the house to be with the boyfriend, that was time stolen away from their child and since he sanctioned it he is just as selfish as her.
While there is some truth to this is it really any different than a husband and wife who go away for a weekend or have a date night every week? That also takes time away from the kids but leads to a more healthy family in the long run. Do you also condem husbands/wives for that?

Yes this is a risky lifestyle. But clearly the selfish one was the wife because she allowed herself to fall in love with her BF and left for her instead of thinking about the family and kids. She should have stopped long before it got to that point.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by maedhros21 » Mon Jun 20, 2016 10:30 am

Hotwifeok wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:
Zona wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.
You are kidding, right?

The guy's wife dumps him for a BBC and somehow Bound2bmine is guilty of "Truly truly selfish thinking on (his) part"???
Entering into a lifestyle that could threaten the stability of your family is selfish thinking how can you call it anything else.....like I said when they chose to do this he was getting his kinks satisfied, she was getting her orgasms but what did the child get out of it except a broken home. I'm sorry but any cuckold who loses their wife to another man is not a victim, it's a gamble when you allow your wife to play with another man and he lost. Another example of selfishness on both their parts is the nights she would leave the house to be with the boyfriend, that was time stolen away from their child and since he sanctioned it he is just as selfish as her.


While there is some truth to this is it really any different than a husband and wife who go away for a weekend or have a date night every week? That also takes time away from the kids but leads to a more healthy family in the long run. Do you also condem husbands/wives for that?

Yes this is a risky lifestyle. But clearly the selfish one was the wife because she allowed herself to fall in love with her BF and left for her instead of thinking about the family and kids. She should have stopped long before it got to that point.
There is a huge difference between going away for a weekend with a spouse or holding a date night every week and what the author was doing, the two things you mentioned are done to strenghten the marriage and thus the family unit. I wont disagree with you that the wife was more selfish than the husband here but in my opinion no matter how reluctantly a wife goes into a hotwife lifestyle it eventually evolves to where the wife is getting more out of it than the man. I know that people who are cuckolds would disagree with me but when viewed from the outside it truly always appears that way,,,, the wife gets more thanone lover while the husband in return gets hours spent alone living with a fantasy.

My point in initially posting here though was that when people become parents they live to make sure their children have a happy life. They make sacrifices and some of those sacrifices mean not being able to do things that might make them happy. This couple completely ignored the risks to their childs happiness and stability to pursue something that would make only them happy EVEN IF PUT THEIR CHILDS FUTURE STABILITY AT RISK. The mother when she first felt real feelings for her lover had a responsibility at that point to stop things but she didnt, the husband when he started to realize his wife was getting too close ie. no more sex for him, had a responsibility to end things. Everything they did in this lifestyle was to please themselves at the expense of their childs happiness....how is that not being ultimately selfish.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Mon Jun 20, 2016 1:33 pm

maedhros21 wrote:I have to ask since no one else did, what happened to your child how old was he/she when you split up? Is he/she calling her step daddy 'daddy' now and is he/she living with your wife. How is your relationship with your child. The reason I'm asking is because it's all fine and well to have fantasies and even to explore them but didnt the two of you ever consider the impact you had on your child when you started playing and then split up? Wasnt your child ever curious about why mommy wasnt home so much? So you got your ultimate cuckold wish, losing your wife to someone else and she got a man who made her forget you but what did your kid get except a broken home? Truly truly selfish thinking on both you and your wifes part.
My daughter lives with me and she had no knowledge of our lifestyle. She does however think that mommy had an affair with her lover. That is better than thinking mom and dad had a sharing lifestyle. I don't talk bad about her mother and she doesn't talk bad about me. We co-parent well.

Has my child been affected I would say yes but she is well adjusted and lives with me know. It was my daughters choice to move with me and I have plenty of help with her. She also spend lots of time with her mother as well.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Mon Jun 20, 2016 1:36 pm

I agree that both of us were reckless. But that is what this lifestyle brings sometimes. The desire and the excitement is so much that its hard to just stop.
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Hotwifeok » Mon Jun 20, 2016 1:52 pm

Reckless. I wouldn't say that automatically. If you thought it was likely to cause your marriage to fail then yes reckless. But if you didn't just risky. We all take risks every day and as long as they are done with proper thought there should be no condemnation.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Zona » Mon Jun 20, 2016 10:22 pm

maedhros21 wrote: My point in initially posting here though was that when people become parents they live to make sure their children have a happy life. They make sacrifices and some of those sacrifices mean not being able to do things that might make them happy. This couple completely ignored the risks to their childs happiness and stability to pursue something that would make only them happy EVEN IF PUT THEIR CHILDS FUTURE STABILITY AT RISK.
I don't disagree with your points here. But regarding the part I have highlighted, couldn't the exact same point be made on almost every thread on this website?
maedhros21 wrote:The mother when she first felt real feelings for her lover had a responsibility at that point to stop things but she didnt, the husband when he started to realize his wife was getting too close ie. no more sex for him, had a responsibility to end things. Everything they did in this lifestyle was to please themselves at the expense of their childs happiness....how is that not being ultimately selfish.
I certainly agree with you that the mother was selfish in the extreme. And you are absolutely correct in your assertion that she should have stopped things when she first realized that the real feelings she was having for her lover would have disastrous consequences.

I wouldn't put too much blame on the husband though. His wife was in charge of her own emotions and I strongly suspect she hid them from her husband for a long time. And when he realized things had changed so badly for their marriage, it was most likely already too late for him to stop anything.

But, again let me state that the arguments you make could be applied to virtually any thread in at least the Hotwife, Cuckold, and Poly forums. Applying them to this thread is not at all helpful to the purpose Bound2bmine intended: a cautionary tale regarding the real consequences that can happen to ANYONE engaged in this activity. So the real moral of the story is right there in the title of his thread.

This can and does happen far too often when people let the hotness of the situation get out of control. I personally know several now divorced couples that I met here on OHW. And I'd bet the ranch there are dozens more that we don't know about. They just stop posting.

I applaud Bound2bmine for graciously posting this thread as a real service to anyone thinking about entering the lifestyle and to anyone already in the lifestyle who has started to perceive danger signs in their marriage.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Hotwifeok » Tue Jun 21, 2016 5:23 am

Zona wrote:
maedhros21 wrote: My point in initially posting here though was that when people become parents they live to make sure their children have a happy life. They make sacrifices and some of those sacrifices mean not being able to do things that might make them happy. This couple completely ignored the risks to their childs happiness and stability to pursue something that would make only them happy EVEN IF PUT THEIR CHILDS FUTURE STABILITY AT RISK.
I don't disagree with your points here. But regarding the part I have highlighted, couldn't the exact same point be made on almost every thread on this website?
maedhros21 wrote:The mother when she first felt real feelings for her lover had a responsibility at that point to stop things but she didnt, the husband when he started to realize his wife was getting too close ie. no more sex for him, had a responsibility to end things. Everything they did in this lifestyle was to please themselves at the expense of their childs happiness....how is that not being ultimately selfish.
I certainly agree with you that the mother was selfish in the extreme. And you are absolutely correct in your assertion that she should have stopped things when she first realized that the real feelings she was having for her lover would have disastrous consequences.

I wouldn't put too much blame on the husband though. His wife was in charge of her own emotions and I strongly suspect she hid them from her husband for a long time. And when he realized things had changed so badly for their marriage, it was most likely already too late for him to stop anything.

But, again let me state that the arguments you make could be applied to virtually any thread in at least the Hotwife, Cuckold, and Poly forums. Applying them to this thread is not at all helpful to the purpose Bound2bmine intended: a cautionary tale regarding the real consequences that can happen to ANYONE engaged in this activity. So the real moral of the story is right there in the title of his thread.

This can and does happen far too often when people let the hotness of the situation get out of control. I personally know several now divorced couples that I met here on OHW. And I'd bet the ranch there are dozens more that we don't know about. They just stop posting.

I applaud Bound2bmine for graciously posting this thread as a real service to anyone thinking about entering the lifestyle and to anyone already in the lifestyle who has started to perceive danger signs in their marriage.
Bound2bmine is taking too much of the blame for this. He was not selfish or reckless.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by maedhros21 » Tue Jun 21, 2016 10:57 am

Hotwifeuk.....

By his own admission on a previous post he admits they were both reckless......I ask you this how do you not hold him responsible at all when he was the one to initially push the hotwife liofestyle on his wife. In most cases from what I have read it is usually the man who pushes his wife into this lifestyle so in my eyes that makes them even more responsible than the wife. I got sucked into this whole subject matter by a different author and I have since formed the opinion that this lifestyle that people write about is an addiction. I have read more accounts of where things fall apart then i have of where things work out and even when they work out it leads to reduced intimacy between the husband and wife.

So I have a question for Bound, if you were to get remarried would you still pursue your fantasies after learning how self destructive they are?

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Hotwifeok » Tue Jun 21, 2016 12:30 pm

maedhros21 wrote:Hotwifeuk.....

By his own admission on a previous post he admits they were both reckless......I ask you this how do you not hold him responsible at all when he was the one to initially push the hotwife liofestyle on his wife. In most cases from what I have read it is usually the man who pushes his wife into this lifestyle so in my eyes that makes them even more responsible than the wife. I got sucked into this whole subject matter by a different author and I have since formed the opinion that this lifestyle that people write about is an addiction. I have read more accounts of where things fall apart then i have of where things work out and even when they work out it leads to reduced intimacy between the husband and wife.

So I have a question for Bound, if you were to get remarried would you still pursue your fantasies after learning how self destructive they are?
I think his admission was wrong based upon the facts he has presented. And I told him he was not reckless. Neither one of them went into the lifestyle thinking it would cause a problem. If they had that would have been reckless IMO.

Responsibility lies with the actions of the one who broke the rules, the trust, and not putting the marriage first. That falls squarely on the wife. She was the one who did all those things, disrespected her husband, and was selfish about her wants. So no. I don't hold B2BM responsible for any of it based upon the facts as presented.

Interesting about your statement about more accounts falling apart than not. That is just made up or a bad perception. There are very very few accounts on here where the marriages fall apart. Are there more than that certainly. But usually they just quit posting when it goes bad. If I where to make that statement twenty people would come out of the woodwork to knock me up side the head and rightfully so.

As far as reduced intimacy. I don't see that as being every time as you state. Yes there are some... But there also are those where they openly talk about a much better marriage and sex life.

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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Bound2bmine » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:00 pm

Hotwifeok wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:Hotwifeuk.....

By his own admission on a previous post he admits they were both reckless......I ask you this how do you not hold him responsible at all when he was the one to initially push the hotwife liofestyle on his wife. In most cases from what I have read it is usually the man who pushes his wife into this lifestyle so in my eyes that makes them even more responsible than the wife. I got sucked into this whole subject matter by a different author and I have since formed the opinion that this lifestyle that people write about is an addiction. I have read more accounts of where things fall apart then i have of where things work out and even when they work out it leads to reduced intimacy between the husband and wife.

So I have a question for Bound, if you were to get remarried would you still pursue your fantasies after learning how self destructive they are?
I think his admission was wrong based upon the facts he has presented. And I told him he was not reckless. Neither one of them went into the lifestyle thinking it would cause a problem. If they had that would have been reckless IMO.

Responsibility lies with the actions of the one who broke the rules, the trust, and not putting the marriage first. That falls squarely on the wife. She was the one who did all those things, disrespected her husband, and was selfish about her wants. So no. I don't hold B2BM responsible for any of it based upon the facts as presented.

Interesting about your statement about more accounts falling apart than not. That is just made up or a bad perception. There are very very few accounts on here where the marriages fall apart. Are there more than that certainly. But usually they just quit posting when it goes bad. If I where to make that statement twenty people would come out of the woodwork to knock me up side the head and rightfully so.

As far as reduced intimacy. I don't see that as being every time as you state. Yes there are some... But there also are those where they openly talk about a much better marriage and sex life.

Well I'm seeing more and more marriages having an issues in the lifestyle. It may be that more people are talking about it.
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maedhros21
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by maedhros21 » Tue Jun 21, 2016 2:27 pm

Hotwifeok wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:Hotwifeuk.....

By his own admission on a previous post he admits they were both reckless......I ask you this how do you not hold him responsible at all when he was the one to initially push the hotwife liofestyle on his wife. In most cases from what I have read it is usually the man who pushes his wife into this lifestyle so in my eyes that makes them even more responsible than the wife. I got sucked into this whole subject matter by a different author and I have since formed the opinion that this lifestyle that people write about is an addiction. I have read more accounts of where things fall apart then i have of where things work out and even when they work out it leads to reduced intimacy between the husband and wife.

So I have a question for Bound, if you were to get remarried would you still pursue your fantasies after learning how self destructive they are?
I think his admission was wrong based upon the facts he has presented. And I told him he was not reckless. Neither one of them went into the lifestyle thinking it would cause a problem. If they had that would have been reckless IMO.

Responsibility lies with the actions of the one who broke the rules, the trust, and not putting the marriage first. That falls squarely on the wife. She was the one who did all those things, disrespected her husband, and was selfish about her wants. So no. I don't hold B2BM responsible for any of it based upon the facts as presented.

Interesting about your statement about more accounts falling apart than not. That is just made up or a bad perception. There are very very few accounts on here where the marriages fall apart. Are there more than that certainly. But usually they just quit posting when it goes bad. If I where to make that statement twenty people would come out of the woodwork to knock me up side the head and rightfully so.

As far as reduced intimacy. I don't see that as being every time as you state. Yes there are some... But there also are those where they openly talk about a much better marriage and sex life.
I am sorry Hotwife but i dont mean to seem argumentative but I think it is kind of rude for you to tell the author of this thread that he is wrong about his own feelings. He admits to him and his wife being reckless but you are going to tell him he wasnt?

As far as entering the lifestyle not thinking it could cause a problem, well that is just naive. Since so much of a relationship between a man and a wife revolves around their intimacy with each other it would be silly to go blindly into something involving that same physical intimacy with another and not assume there could be problems. Why do you think so many couples who do try this lifestyle try and set rules and boundaries, specifically because they acknowledge the potential hazards. Whether they stick to their own self appointed rules is one thing, from the brief description bound gave us of his wife and his experience he didnt mention any such rules.

It's easy to say the wife should police herself when feelings start to develop but that is much easier said than done. It's not as if in one moment she decides she has feelings for someone else, it develops over time and shared intimacy. I in no way believe the end result of this tragic relationship was all bounds fault but the blame should be shared equally.

Hotwifing is so different than swinging or having an open marriage because only one side of the partnership is getting satisfaction outside their marriage. The husband just has his imagination to keep him entertained while his wife is enjoying another man. It would once again be naive on the mans part to never even think there could be a chance that his wife would leave him for her lover. From what I have read on the subject that is actually part of the appeal in sending the wife to be with someone else so the husband shouldnt feel blindsided when that possibility comes true.

You sound like someone who has had great experiences in this lifestyle and I hope that you continue to do so and not wake up in the nightmare our author did. I actually started responding to this thread because of the innocent third party in the whole saga and that is the person my heart goes out to, growing up in a broken home sucks no matter how well adjusted your parents think you are.

Hotwifeok
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Re: Be Careful What you Wish For (true story)

Unread post by Hotwifeok » Tue Jun 21, 2016 4:02 pm

Bound2bmine wrote:
Hotwifeok wrote:
maedhros21 wrote:Hotwifeuk.....

By his own admission on a previous post he admits they were both reckless......I ask you this how do you not hold him responsible at all when he was the one to initially push the hotwife liofestyle on his wife. In most cases from what I have read it is usually the man who pushes his wife into this lifestyle so in my eyes that makes them even more responsible than the wife. I got sucked into this whole subject matter by a different author and I have since formed the opinion that this lifestyle that people write about is an addiction. I have read more accounts of where things fall apart then i have of where things work out and even when they work out it leads to reduced intimacy between the husband and wife.

So I have a question for Bound, if you were to get remarried would you still pursue your fantasies after learning how self destructive they are?
I think his admission was wrong based upon the facts he has presented. And I told him he was not reckless. Neither one of them went into the lifestyle thinking it would cause a problem. If they had that would have been reckless IMO.

Responsibility lies with the actions of the one who broke the rules, the trust, and not putting the marriage first. That falls squarely on the wife. She was the one who did all those things, disrespected her husband, and was selfish about her wants. So no. I don't hold B2BM responsible for any of it based upon the facts as presented.

Interesting about your statement about more accounts falling apart than not. That is just made up or a bad perception. There are very very few accounts on here where the marriages fall apart. Are there more than that certainly. But usually they just quit posting when it goes bad. If I where to make that statement twenty people would come out of the woodwork to knock me up side the head and rightfully so.

As far as reduced intimacy. I don't see that as being every time as you state. Yes there are some... But there also are those where they openly talk about a much better marriage and sex life.

Well I'm seeing more and more marriages having an issues in the lifestyle. It may be that more people are talking about it.
I think you are right. More and more are getting out of the fantasy world for jerk-off material and describing the ups and downs of the lifestyle. I think that is a hugely positive thing so that people can be properly prepared and better see the issues if they come at them. There are still a lot of people only describing the fantasy side and refusing to address the realistic side... Especially on the cuck forum.

And who knows... Some of it may be enhanced to make it sound better. It is hard to really know.

I have always been an advocate for telling the whole story... Just as you have done here. I know it was painful but I really appreciate what you posted.

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