Does being Cuckold mean needing to be submissive

[Mgcouplemn]

Does being Cuckold mean needing to be submissive and not being involved? I have been cuckold to my hotwife since before the word Cuckold was popular. About 40 plus years ago my wife and I were pretty avid swingers and played a lot. After time I was more interested in watching her having sex than me having sex with other women. I have always been involved in the sex in some way, she never goes solo. When we have a guy servicing her he is just one of our many toys to play with. I encourage my wife to have sex with others, I help with the introduction, setting up the encounter, instruct the guy with our rules, undress her for him, then I sit next to the bed they fuck in and masturbate while they fuck. Does our way constitute as not being a Cuckold?

[ucaneffher]

I think there are many different "denominations" of cuckolds. Some are closet gays, some are bi-curious and both likely use cuckoldry as an excuse to get close to men, some are simply men of power just wanting to let go a little in their personal life and be dominated, and some just watched way too much porn before their brains were developed and now want their partner to just fuck men for his pleasure as in their own personal porn.

I think that i switch back and forth a little bit with minor submission but I will never be full on whipped in the sense that i am humiliated or disrespected by either my partner or her lovers.

[trecital]

"Does being Cuckold mean needing to be submissive and not being involved?"

Well, you only have to read this forum to understand that this is not true.
Granted, there are a lot of posts with people describing 'submissive' content.
But being submissive isn't a pre requisite for cuckolding.
You can enjoy humiliation without being submissive.

[Loserpaul]

Many cuckolds are submissive to their wives and their wife's bulls but that does not mean to say that all are.

[tractorman2]

We are both dominant people yet sexually submissive too, she to her lovers, me to her sexually. Away from our LS i am defiantely the dominant male of this house.

[Threeisacharm]

All couples are different and every experience is different. From reading posts, some want dominance and humiliation while others want to experience voyeurism.

I like some elements that my partner takes charge and finds a lover but includes me in the talk that she wants a bigger cock and to make me watch. Not my first kink in sending her away to get fucked but if it happened I would like a call during, a picture or especially the trophy creamier evidence and would rather be on the inside in the seduce and initial feelings of lust.

During sex, primary is that she is enjoying it. Second is that she addresses me occasionally during it and that there is a dialog that includes:
*his cock is bigger than mine and he is fucking me better than you can
*I am going to cum on his cock
*do you like watching me or keep jerking off watching him stretch me

I would not wear a cage but in a few experiences my ex threw her panties at me and told me to put them on after the bull took them off her and was made to wear them to cover up my small cock and as a form of humiliation that I enjoyed. Also like variety so some threesomes I have had involved no aspects of cuckolding and were pure 3 somes where we were all enjoying the sex and where me and the other guy were taking turns and changing positions, pleasuring her.

In every day life though, not looking for dominance and humiliation and want the relationship to be best friends based.

[mrdnrm]

I have an extreme dominant personality, I am a control freak, I control everything from household, family, and my three businesses. (a total of 18 employees) So with that when it comes to sex and life in the bedroom, I have reach a point where as I am tired of controlling everything in my live therefore I am a complete submissive allowing my wife and her lovers to have complete control over me. I do as I am told and I am very happy to serve.

[Des 31]

Does being Cuckold mean needing to be submissive and not being involved? I have been cuckold to my hotwife since before the word Cuckold was popular. About 40 plus years ago my wife and I were pretty avid swingers and played a lot. After time I was more interested in watching her having sex than me having sex with other women. I have always been involved in the sex in some way, she never goes solo. When we have a guy servicing her he is just one of our many toys to play with. I encourage my wife to have sex with others, I help with the introduction, setting up the encounter, instruct the guy with our rules, undress her for him, then I sit next to the bed they fuck in and masturbate while they fuck. Does our way constitute as not being a Cuckold?

I don't set rules. My wife has her own, and she makes decisions if she feels it to be necessary. But no, the designation doesn't necessarily require a submissive personality. "Cuckolding" in the more popular vernacular includes all sorts of personalities, and many - perhaps most, fit well into the "hotwife" category. Here at this website - as with others, - the term cuckold generally is used in female-led relationships with submissive males, so you're likely to get a variety of opinions by guys who prefer to be submissive. I am not one of those but don't judge any who are. Everyone is different in some way.'

~ Des

[Bent_n_Twisted]

Does our way constitute as not being a Cuckold?

The only element that is required for you to be a cuckold, is for your wife to be fucking other guys, whether you are aware of it or not. Whether you like it or not, whether you participate or not, or in what ways you might participate is irrelevant.

I am not naturally 'submissive', in fact, there are some who might be inclined to say that a psych Dr. would diagnose me as having 'oppositional defiance disorder'...and they might not be wrong...which has occasionally gotten me into trouble.

However, I get a thrill from taking risks, and when it comes to sex I am aroused by non-consent and being forced to do things that I don't necessarily 'want' to do and would not willingly do. To that end, I have supplied my wife with the power and freedom to engage in any sexual activities she desires, with anyone she desires, and with the power to compel me to participate in any ways she desires (whether I want to or not).

So, if she is fucking other guys, I am still a cuckold even though I'm not 'submissive'. It works for us- I get turned on by her being able to fuck around and to force me to do things I don't want to do, and *she* gets turned on by being able to make me do certain things whether I want to or not.

You don't need to conform to anyone else's idea of what constitutes a cuckold. You do you in whatever way you (and your wife) want to do it.

[WifeKnowsBest]

Being a cuckold simply means that one accept that one's wife sleeps with other men.

In today's society where the line between girlfriend and wife is quite blurred one could argue that one could be cuckold by a girlfriend.

I guess one could say that this requires to some degree submission, however I would not say that that makes you submissive.

In this community far too many want to interject their form of cuckoldry as the only true cuckoldry. However in fact cuckoldry is as diverse as those who participate.

[Cuckyboy3]

By definition a cuckold has agreed, whether reluctantly or willingly, to his wife having sex with another man while he is not allowed to reciprocate. That itself is a form of submission.

He may be dominant in other respects but the cuckolding is inseparable from at least some inherent level of submission.

[Filou]

To me that in itself is not nesessarily a form of submission. Can be, but must not. Why ? I will come o that later on.

To me the term cuckold always included some form of submission. Even if you are not straight sexually submissive there is a certain connotation in this aspect. Just look on how society woud see and define a cuckold who knows about the fact and accepts it - certainly not on eyelevel with his wife...^^

And while I am usuaally for more wider definitions to have softer lines and not to exclude people it is not so in this case ! Why ? Because some of the first things I learned when I stumbled across this board was the term "stag". And to me the definition of a stag is very much the one of a cuckold just that he is on an eyelevel with his partner.

As I might miss the finer differences though a question to those who voted that cuckolding is not about some form of submission: If it is not, what is the difference between a cuckold and a stag ?

To but something straight though: A cuckold beeing in some way submissive does certainly not mean that they can not be involved / included in some way.

[CoupleFun555]

I am not really sure. I am not a submissive person in any part of my life. While in joy being pegged, I am the one who typically requests it.

I have a small penis and wear a sleeve/extender for sex with my wife. That sounds like cuckolding but I actually change depths, will pump hard with the sleeve, and will hold her close to climax and savor it. I also will use a stretching device on my penis because she would prefer if I were bigger. We rarely have PIV sex unless she has already orgasmed and then I enter her while she is stretched from a sleeve, a bf, or a big vibrator.

She has 3 boyfriends, all bigger than me. In our 3-somes, I get involved pretty regularly but also enjoy watching. I don’t service the other guy at all.

I like when my wife admits that I have a small penis, but I am confident in bed anyways.

Am I cuckold? I think I probably qualify as one because I enjoy that I only have PIV sex after she’s already been satisfied by something big or my mouth, or a combo of both. I also like being submissive during pegging. If being a cuckold means that I am overwhelmingly submissive in bed, than that is just not me.

[gruenberg]

i don`t see myself as a submissive. neither at home, nor at work or in other situations.

it is more that my wife becomes the submissive when being around her lovers.

[dinoo]

I answered NO but I have to confess that if she loved me watching.
And I loved to be the watcher.
Especially when she was fully engaged with a lover.

Once she obeyed her lover by doing all he wanted to do with her like fucking her even painly. He warned her in advance. I did hear this.
At the end of the "show" he said to me:
"You saw how easily a woman can be turned into a submissive one. You can be very proud of her. She is rare one, a special one.
I hope to meet her more times. And, I'm sorry that I did hurt her but obviously she liked all."

[caligula12]

That completely depends on you and your wife! I am a cuckold but not submissive. Remember, there is no one rule fits all. You made rules based on YOU & Wife/Gf, preferences. Simple!

[canadianwittol]

I believe it is a naturally submissive position to take, at least if the cuckold accepts his cuckolding (and technically, therefore becomes a wittol).

If only for the fact that it is, by definition, a lopsided arrangement - you are OK with your wife having privileges and benefits which are not extended to you, or which you have willingly waived. You have agreed with her that she deserves benefits which you do not deserve.

Whether or not anything else happens to more deliberately, obviously place the cuckold in a submissive position, this in and of itself is a submission to your wife.

[CoupleFun555]

I believe it is a naturally submissive position to take, at least if the cuckold accepts his cuckolding (and technically, therefore becomes a wittol).

If only for the fact that it is, by definition, a lopsided arrangement - you are OK with your wife having privileges and benefits which are not extended to you, or which you have willingly waived. You have agreed with her that she deserves benefits which you do not deserve.

Whether or not anything else happens to more deliberately, obviously place the cuckold in a submissive position, this in and of itself is a submission to your wife.

That makes some sense. I don’t consider myself submissive but I understand what you wrote and it may describe my relationship with her. However, I am also “allowed” to have a gf and have flirted with some women.

[All4Jenna]

The question needs further defining.

Submissive in personality or submissive in sexual playtime?

[All4Jenna]

The question needs further defining.

Submissive in personality or submissive in sexual playtime?

[4herpleasure89]

My friends in the lifestyle have a difficult time seeing me as a cuckold. I assume it’s because in no way do I present myself as a submissive. And my wife doesn’t present herself as dominant. But the term cuckold doesn’t have anything to do with these things, and the variety is endless.

[Mgcouplemn]

By definition a cuckold has agreed, whether reluctantly or willingly, to his wife having sex with another man while he is not allowed to reciprocate. That itself is a form of submission.

Not entirely true, my wife and I enjoy having other guys fucking her, we use them like toys. My wife and I enjoy sex a lot, we also love watching each other masturbate, we both like seeing the other cumming. We have all kinds of adult toys to use on ourselves while the other watches or use together. I usually initiate us finding some one to fuck her while I watch because I love the sight of her being screwed. I usually have very powerful orgasms jerking off when she has some guy fucking her, she likes seeing me watching her fuck while jerking off. Most of the time while right after I shoot my cum in the air she will be done with the guy and push him off her and have him leave, the she wants me to finish her off while the guy is getting ready to leave, she like the guy seeing her orgasming on my cock.

[bradisalpha]

By definition a cuckold has agreed, whether reluctantly or willingly, to his wife having sex with another man while he is not allowed to reciprocate. That itself is a form of submission.

He may be dominant in other respects but the cuckolding is inseparable from at least some inherent level of submission.

In my experience as a BF, other than a definite Stag relationship, I find this true.

Just saying…

Brad

[LongTermHubby]

I think there are as many variations in the cuckold lifestyle as there are couples in it.

[dinoo]

I think there are as many variations in the cuckold lifestyle as there are couples in it.

How very true I think too.

Am I a cuckold or not, I wondered often.
When other men were involved, I'm rather sure I was.

But in vanilla life?
Then it was more role playing of every sort.
About one thing I can be: she loved to be a dominant dirty minded woman.
There were examples too much.
But it ended (almost) always by caressing and kissing me. To prove she loved me being submissive.

Dinoo