edcvfrxsw wrote: ↑Tue Aug 22, 2023 2:01 pm
UPDATE!
Things are moving fast and feelings are involved. I’m getting nervous but also this is so hot. I’ll update soon!
So delayed update because a lot has been going on in life, with the same moving along in near full force.
I will admit, I have had a few moments of freaking out since the last update. The situation’s reality has hit the both of us in full force: for me, it’s knowing that my girlfriend is literally dating someone and as per her words, “falling in love”. For my girlfriend, it’s realizing that it may be possible to love two men whereas all her life she was told and believed monogamy was the only option.
They have been texting near non stop and they are both equally infatuated with one another. They have two to three hour long FaceTime or voice call sessions, learning more personal details about one another’s lives. The craziest was when my girlfriend received an offer from work and I am waiting to pick her up after work. When we meet, she is already on the phone with someone, telling them about how she isn’t pleased with the amount offered. I thought it was her mother, but soon learned it was Marc. That phone call between the two lasted two hours…
The two of them haven’t formally established their situation yet. Marc is quite uncomfortable with the fact that I am in the picture, and often mentions to my girlfriend that he wants her all to himself. She gets very smitten whenever he says that, because she admits that she is possessive about him too. But in conversations between my girlfriend and I, she mentions that they are practically dating and he’s her boyfriend to her.
We often also discuss the possibility of her falling in love. She says that she hasn’t fallen in love but it’s going there. She never thought it would be possible to be in love with multiple men, but she totally understands it now and sees it as something realistic. We were busy with life for the weekend, so was Marc, therefore they couldn’t text each other much nor have their calls. She would often mention to me how she misses him a lot. One night, when we got drunk and I told her in bed to imagine she’s with him. It started off well, with her telling me she misses him; the back of his head, his lips, his eyes and his chest. Then she suddenly started bawling, all confused about how she misses another man so much and how she is telling me about it.
I think it’s too late to go back now: no way to get the cat in the bag. I freakout about her leaving me for him, and she hasn’t provided any guarantees against this. The only thing helping to prevent it is the distance between the two: which is a relief because otherwise it all tends to feel very omnipresent. But I have to began to accept its a possibility and there’s no way around it. I sometimes wish if we kept this highly on the sexual side, something that she can experience and the both of us could share together.
But her preference is that she compartmentalizes the both of us: her bed with him remains separated from her bed with me. I freakout over this point and get intense fomo because it’s not at all what I want. I would very much prefer to also have things open up on my end then. But maybe it’s my ego talking, not too sure. My girlfriend still gets very jealous when I text any of the girls she has identified to have a thing for me. We’ll see how it progresses, but I told my girlfriend that I don’t get anything out of simply an open relationship. I’m discovering this with her and her being closed off about the relationship does nothing for me except help the anxious thoughts breed.
We’re still busy, but should be to ourselves only in the next couple of weeks. I will have more time to fully decompress and write out the things that have happened. Would love the reader’s feedback on everything, maybe with the kinkiness of it sidelined for a moment.