Finally Told wife I want her to Hotwife

[BDJ]

Having the conversation, over and over may be the problem. Have you each defined specifically what each expects emotionally from engaging in this lifestyle. Preconceptions and misconceptions can kill whatever progress you both have made. But you started this train down the track and now it is up to you to discover how you can overcome your doubts and support your loving wife. A POSITIVE attitude while reflecting on those aspects of your journey will go far in smoothing things over between you two.

As I said, once she's on board is not the time to back out. Have a night out, relax in a neutral and private location with a glass on wine, and LISTEN to her.

That's my advice. I hope it works out for both of you.

BDJ

[ThePerfectHubby87]

Having the conversation, over and over may be the problem. Have you each defined specifically what each expects emotionally from engaging in this lifestyle. Preconceptions and misconceptions can kill whatever progress you both have made. But you started this train down the track and now it is up to you to discover how you can overcome your doubts and support your loving wife. A POSITIVE attitude while reflecting on those aspects of your journey will go far in smoothing things over between you two.

As I said, once she's on board is not the time to back out. Have a night out, relax in a neutral and private location with a glass on wine, and LISTEN to her.

That's my advice. I hope it works out for both of you.

BDJ

Thank you for the advice.

[aztd]

I have been going back and forth in my head a lot lately. I never thought I would be this guy but I am....I think it's insecurity and ego that is giving me a hard time accepting things are going to change. Inhave wanted this for so long but still feel so much angst.
How can I get over this? Anyone have similar situation happen? I feel bad bc my wife wants it so bad...she is trying to be understanding and is saying all the right things to me. But I know she's ready now. We have had this conversation multiple times. What do you all think? What do you recommend?

If your not comfortable moving forward tell her and tell her why. Trust that she will honor your feeling.

[Farmgirl]

Having the conversation, over and over may be the problem. Have you each defined specifically what each expects emotionally from engaging in this lifestyle. Preconceptions and misconceptions can kill whatever progress you both have made. But you started this train down the track and now it is up to you to discover how you can overcome your doubts and support your loving wife. A POSITIVE attitude while reflecting on those aspects of your journey will go far in smoothing things over between you two.

As I said, once she's on board is not the time to back out. Have a night out, relax in a neutral and private location with a glass on wine, and LISTEN to her.

That's my advice. I hope it works out for both of you.

BDJ

Thank you for the advice.

@BDJ has given you excellent advice.
If you want this, a Hotwife, then be happy your wife wants it too. Many, many husbands dream of what you are on the cusp of having. Don't keep jerking your wife around, either follow through on what you want or call it quits. You're not being fair and honest with her.
If you need to slow things down, then tell her, but don't expect her to just turn it on and off. She is making a deep change in how she views herself, it's not like she's changing clothes or hairstyles, she is changing who she is.
Do you want the new "her", the wife of your dreams, or do you want the old "her"?

[RetiredSnowbird]

Either get on board or let your dream pass you by. You’re not being fair to your wife by jerking her around emotionally. You’re too much into yourself only.

[Des 31]

Hello Hotwives,
Last night I finally confessed to Wife of 12 years that I have a hotwife fantasy. I was so nervous as I love her so much and didnt know how she would take it. She has never even thought about sleeping with other men since we have been together. She is a little more conservative when it comes to sex so I expected this to be a shocking revelation. I was shocked that she seemed to take the news very well. She said she didn't think it would ever happen but was happy I was able to share this with her. She said the Hotwife idea was kind of hot and empowering but it was new to her because she never thought about being with anyone else. She had 9 partners before meeting me and I think she only enjoyed sex with 1 before me or so she says lol.

She said she wants to let the thought marinate for a while. Can I please get advice from hotwives that never thought they would do this. What should my next step be? How long should I wait to bring it up? I have the feeling once she can wrap her head around the idea she may be interested. What should I prepare for in the coming days or weeks.

Thank you for letting me share.

I had encouraged my wife to have sex with other men for about a year before she finally agreed. Now, she says this would have been great if we started when we first married. She later told me her initial reluctance was that she believed it was some sort of trick for her to allow me to date other women. Over time, she came to understand that wasn't my motivation. At first she said she was doing it for me because that's what I wanted. Now, she has a joke that I hear often, "I do it for both of us -- but mostly for me." (That was funny but true.)

[allways]

I have been going back and forth in my head a lot lately. I never thought I would be this guy but I am....I think it's insecurity and ego that is giving me a hard time accepting things are going to change. Inhave wanted this for so long but still feel so much angst.
How can I get over this? Anyone have similar situation happen? I feel bad bc my wife wants it so bad...she is trying to be understanding and is saying all the right things to me. But I know she's ready now. We have had this conversation multiple times. What do you all think? What do you recommend?

The best way to stop the insecurity is to show your wife how much you love her and reap the benifits. How? By helping out more at home, show more affection and be supportive of her by trusting her judgement with a play mate. You have only started the journey. I see your age is listed as 38 and I assume your wife is a couple of years younger you have lots of time to bed down your insecurity.

The odds on your pretty wife finding a suitable don juan lothario in the short term is unlikely. There are a lot of woulda shoulda coulda guys out there who may ghost her during her search. That can be a real turn off and start her doubting her ability to experience the forbidden fruit.

Has your wife expressed her preference? Does she want to date and bed her playmate without you there at least initially? Is that what gives you the heebie jeebies?

[ThePerfectHubby87]

It's been a while. The wife and I have been talking to guys online and tomorrow, Sat night, we have our first meet up. We're meeting for a few drinks at a local bar and then heading for mfm all night fun....wish us luck! I'm excited. Wife is excited.

[hoping_she_will_1day]

It's been a while. The wife and I have been talking to guys online and tomorrow, Sat night, we have our first meet up. We're meeting for a few drinks at a local bar and then heading for mfm all night fun....wish us luck! I'm excited. Wife is excited.

Exciting news!! Best of luck to you both. I hope the drinks help everyone relax and that you both get everything you've dreamed of from you evening of Hotwifing fun!

[whosbeensleeping]

Fingers crossed the guy is a stand up guy in all ways.

[joel68]

So what happened last night? Please tell us!

[joel68]

And can you describe her? Age, height, weight, hair color, & maybe measurements if you know them.

You haven’t posted any pics that could locate. So I am sure a description will at least give us a visual in our minds.

[ThePerfectHubby87]

We were running late to our meet up and the 3rd couldn't stay out past 12:00 pm. We got there at 10:30 pm and didn't want to rush it so we just hangout at the bar. It was really fun. We were both really nervous at first. I kind of settled in and the wifey was still very nervous. She really enjoyed the night and we all had a good connection. Basically decided on another date to meet. We walked him to his car and they started making out. He slipped his hand and rubbed her clit for a minute. They kissed for a few minutes and we said out goodbyes. It was a fun night. Wifey and I had great sex when we got home! We're on our way.

[ThePerfectHubby87]

And can you describe her? Age, height, weight, hair color, & maybe measurements if you know them.

You haven’t posted any pics that could locate. So I am sure a description will at least give us a visual in our minds.

We are 36 years old. Wifey is 5'6" Latina with the thickest black curly hair. Thick ass and perky B's. I don't know her exact weight but she's lean. Brown eyes. It's tough to choose her beat asset but I would have to go with her face.
We're not posting pictures here.

[joel68]

Thxs. She sounds hot and very fuckable. It appears like she’s really for this. Btw, you too.

Did she feel his cock? Does she think he’s gonna fuck her good when it goes down?

[joel68]

And do you want mfm from here going forward or do you think you will eventually just want to sit back and watch her get fucked?

[ThePerfectHubby87]

Thxs. She sounds hot and very fuckable. It appears like she’s really for this. Btw, you too.

Did she feel his cock? Does she think he’s gonna fuck her good when it goes down?

She did not feel his dick. She thinks he's going to fuck her real good. Why else do it, right?

[ThePerfectHubby87]

And do you want mfm from here going forward or do you think you will eventually just want to sit back and watch her get fucked?

Wifey is in to mfm with me. She likes to put on a show for me and I want to see her have fun. Simple as that.

[joel68]

So when will you see him again?

[ThePerfectHubby87]

So when will you see him again?

Early April

[joel68]

Good. Not too long to wait. Only a couple of weeks.

[CuriousOne36]

What you went through to get her here sounds sooo much like my wife and I. She still makes it a point to say “you know it will never really happen” but she now plays along and she comes up with some fantasy scenarios on her own now where it used to be just me that brought up scenarios. My wife as well like to be submissive to me. I found out when she lost a bet and had to be my slave. We roll play that I’m someone her husband lost her too and I say things like if I didn’t know better I would think your husband lost on purpose. Usually ends up with good sex. I have been very open that the thought of seeing her with a big one gets be hard beyond belief. It’s more of a statement of fact not a suggestion and she has accepted it. I’m envious of you and can’t wait to hear how it goes for you both!!! There is still hope for me!!! You’re 20 plus years younger than me and she’s known what gets me going since we used to read penthouse letters when we were just starting to date in our 20s. I understand when you had second thoughts because when I was your age I would lose my enthusiasm after I ejaculated. I’m positive I would be ok with it now because I probably wouldn’t need any stimulation like a blue pill when I saw her with a big one. She doesn’t think she could come back from it, but at least she plays along and I can always hope (been doing it for years anyway hahaha.

Congratulations!!!! I’ll be watching this thread for updates!!!!

[ThePerfectHubby87]

It's been a long time coming. Last night my wife became Hotwife official. We met a bull online and we met up at a bar. We took my wife to a nice hotel and ducked her for hours. It was a great night and I expect there will be plenty more to come.

[hoping_she_will_1day]

Congratulations!
Sounds like she must have enjoyed herself, and you're feeling good about everything as well.
Hope she's not too sore!

[Shauncuckold]

Congratulations. Enjoy the moment.

Mr. Swan