Our Hotwives

The journey
Well here goes. I wanted to share our journey in hopes that someone else will read this and be able to take away something that will help them sort out the roller coaster that can be this lifestyle.
What follows is my view of events from my perspective. My wife my have a slightly different perspective. However the facts are solid.
So my wife and I have been together for 34 years we started dating when in high school. It was a pretty typical high school dating experience.
We fought and made up like any HS couple.
When we graduated we moved into our first apartment, what a crazy place that was. We thought the neighbor had three different women he was juggling LOL.
It seemed like we could hear them having sex all the time.
We had a pretty normal sex life. Nothing crazy but now I realize that was probably my fault.
My wife was much more adventurous than me and we probably would’ve had a lot more fun if I wasn’t so introverted.
Don’t get me wrong we had sex like rabbits all the time. But it was very vanilla.
My wife ( girlfriend at the time) started hanging out with one of her customers at the restaurant where she worked He was an older gentleman, she was kinda into older men at the time. I was very confused with the whole thing. Was she leaving me or just looking for someone for sex I couldn’t wrap my head around it all.
I got extremely jealous and couldn’t handle the situation.
The guy invited her to go with him to a swingers club. Looking back if I had been more mature at the time this is where our introduction to the lifestyle could’ve started.
Unfortunately I was not ready for this and she knew that I couldn’t have handled it. I was very immature and insecure about our relationship.
Fast forward about thirty years and we get where we are today. My wife has been a hotwife/vixen for almost two years. And starting this adventure is what I want to share.

So life happened and as the years passed we settled into a routine. Our sex life began to get stale and even stopped for a while. After a few years of this we put in conscious effort to make our sex life better.
Unfortunately I started experiencing some mental health issues and this kinda threw everything off the rails.
We would take one step forward and two steps back it was a difficult time.
During this time I gradually started to notice that I was starting to experience some problems with erectile dysfunction as this got worse I became more depressed and started to pull away from my wife. It was a very difficult time for me.
As things progressed I started to get more jealous and even accused her of cheating on me. At one point I even chased her down the road in her car at very high speeds.
I was not happy with who I had become and knew I needed to change or I was going to lose her and my family.
I was determined to make things right!
After thinking about it for several months I approached her about an idea I had.
Since we got together so young she never had a chance to really date around and experience sex with other guys. And my performance issues in the bedroom were getting worse. I wanted to offer her a change so drastic that she would know that I was serious about making a change in our relationship. I didn’t want to be that guy who accused her of cheating and I didn’t want my jealousy to control me anymore.
So I thought what better way to face fear head on than to totally let go of the one person I was so afraid of losing.


We sat down and I presented my plans to allow her the freedom to truly choose her own destiny.
I would 100% support her decision no matter how difficult it may be for me. I told her that I wanted her to have complete sexual freedom. I wanted her to go explore with different men and express her sexuality to the fullest.
Now I had planned all this out in my head, but I really had no clue what I was doing. I wasn’t ready for how quickly she would discover her inner bad girl!
We discussed that I wanted her to have sex with other men. And she could pick anyone she wanted nothing was off limits no taboos. I’m pretty sure that she thought I was trying to trick her into doing something wrong so I could just yell at her ( that was the old me). More to come!

Great start. Cant wait to read more!

The time finally came to be a man of my word and get out of the way.
We joined several online communities and set off looking for guys for her.
She took to it like a duck to water she enjoyed the flirting and sharing her pictures with the guys. I think she was surprised that so many men were interested in a plus size woman.
I could literally see her confidence growing daily it was awesome.
She was really coming out sexually
I totally loved seeing her happiness she was giddy like a school girl exploring the menu of men.
After spending some time chatting with a couple of men she eventually took the plunge. She chose a guy that I think was the safest bet for her at the time.
I was away at a conference and I got a text that she was going to meet with this guy she had been talking with.
He was a younger guy and very non-threatening. They met at a motel that she had arranged for them. She arrived early to stay in control of the meeting. She sat nervously in the room waiting for him she knew that she could do this. She was in control of the new her. Like the phoenix she had risen up from everything behind her and now was about to become free. To become the sexually free woman she had inside.
When the younger man arrived she greeted him at the door. They exchanged greetings and made small talk. The entire situation was awkward from beginning to end it didn’t last very long.
The goal of this play time was really just to prove to her that she could do it. She had gone through with it and now there was no reason to turn back.
She enjoyed the idea of it and now she just needed to find men that better fit what she was really looking for.
The genie was out of the bottle and it was never going back in!

Fearlesspain thank you for reading. Glad you liked it.

Another great installment. I cant wait to see where things go next. Glad she got the warm up out of the way.

enjoying your journey!

After that first time she began her search for men that had more of the qualities she wanted.
As her husband it was my job to support her in her search.
Unfortunately I was having my own problems with this adventure.
Jealousy was messing with me and I didn’t know how to deal with it.
I was in “what if” mode not sure of my feelings and over analyzing the meaning of everything we were doing.
I remembered what I had read about this lifestyle and just kept thinking that everyone said that communication was the key.
So we sat and talked for hours about my feelings and her feelings and thoughts. We honestly had never had deep discussions like this before.
I think we both learned a lot more about each other in the first few months than ever before.
I was so worried that she would fall in love with all of the men she had sex with. I didn’t want her holding hands, kissing, going out on dates or anything that was typical relationship stuff. I made all kinds of crazy rules for her to follow. I was sure that even though I had been the one to propose the idea that she would end up leaving me for one of these men.
She tried following my rules but they weren’t realistic after all who has sex with someone without kissing them.
I could not have imagined the difference between the way her and I think. Until I could wrap my head around her thought process I was a total hot mess.
It took months for me to realize that to her it was just great sex that she was going for and she could mostly disconnect from her feelings.
I say mostly because this would be a topic of discussion in the near future.


The search for more guys began again. She found a couple of guys middle aged and reasonably fit and good looking. One of the guys “R” we actually were texting pictures back and forth as he got a blow job from another girl. This is one of the first guys she wanted to meet I went to the bar with her to meet with him. He was kind and we hit it off.
As we sat and talked things became more sexual in nature. So she took him out back behind the bar and gave “R” one hell of a blow job ( she is amazing at that). She didn’t even pause as she dropped to her knees and took “R’s” cock in her mouth. I had never seen or even dreamed that I would be watching my wife giving basically a stranger a blow job. Her performance was such a turn on to watch that I came in my pants just watching. As things wrapped up we all made plans to get together again. She really seemed to enjoy being a total slut in front of her husband! As we walked back to our car we discussed how much fun that was and I told her I wanted to see her in action again. I told her how hot it was to see her with another man’s cock in her mouth, it was amazing!

BDHank wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 27, 2024 4:04 pm

enjoying your journey!

Thanks for reading

Thanks, looking forward to more!

wittol wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 01, 2024 6:18 am

Thanks, looking forward to more!

It’s been a wild ride for us so far
More to come soon

I soon found out that she was just getting started as she looked through the guys online. She found another guy “B” he was in good shape. They spent a good bit of time texting back and forth. Her and “B” really seemed to have good chemistry with each other. She really wanted to see “B” and have some fun with him. They set up a time but unfortunately it was a time that I couldn’t participate so she went alone. I was really worried about her but she felt comfortable with him, at least through text and phone conversations.
She went over to his house I had all of his contact info and her and I kept checking in with each other. She really enjoyed her time with “B” he took good care of her needs. It was a good couple of hours and they agreed that they needed to do it again soon. The two of them are to this very day friends.
We both would enjoy some play time at his place in the future but that’s for another time.


It seemed like my wife was constantly online looking for new guys. She was loving the attention and variety of men. She said that looking and talking and texting with so many men was like having another full time job. But she still enjoyed it.
Well another guy “K” came up on her radar. He was physically fit and well endowed definitely her type. She wanted his nice thick cock in her. We tried to set up a meet and greet but unfortunately he had issues he needed to attend to. So we had to put off meeting him for a while. When it was time for another meeting he no showed again ( I was NOT happy with him so far). So we texted “R” and he said come on over, we did. It ended up turning into an impromptu threesome with “R” it wasn’t earth shattering but it was technically our first time having a threesome. Fun.


A couple of weeks passed and she finally heard from “K” he had some family issues that were important and had to take care of and that’s why he no showed us.
I was frustrated and didn’t want to meet him at this point.
So she decided to go ahead and meet with him on her own. The meeting went well she liked him enough to want to meet up with him again and see where things went.
Well let’s just say that things went very very good. Their sexual energy was a complete match it was like they were made for each other. This started off several weeks of intense sexual activity she loved his cock and he lasted for a long time.
Little did we know at the time that he would become her favorite play partner. They have continued to play about once a week for over a year so far.

As she searched for new men she came across one that peaked her interest. Let’s call him “J” .
He wasn’t bad looking and was quite a good talker not to mention well endowed ( this was her type). Until this guy she had just been texting with most of the guys, this one quickly moved to phone calls of several hours. She was really smitten with this guy they seamed to have a lot in common.
The thing that was really different about him was that he preferred the dating scene. J wanted to take her on dates with flowers and the whole nine yards. And this would precede the sexual part of the evening.
I was very uncomfortable with this I felt betrayed. I was beside myself with worry that this would lead to her falling for him romantically. We talked about it and I cried a lot. I felt like my world was ending and I was completely helpless to do anything. Now looking back on it I was really upset because I didn’t realize how strong my wife’s commitment is to us. We have grown so much in the last year and a half and I now have a better understanding of the strength of our relationship. I know I have nothing to worry about we are like a rock.


A week or so went by and everything was pretty quiet. But it would not stay that way. She started talking to J again and it wasn’t long before they were making plans to get together.
While she had taken the dating off the table she was very clear on her intentions to have sex with J. I know that when she makes up her mind to do something she will do it. I had voiced my concerns and she listened to them all. She was doing what she could to ease my anxiety but I knew she needed to follow through with this.
If she didn’t it would hang over her head and become the what if question in the back of her head.
So they made their plans and when the time came they met up.
From what I understand it was nice he was a gentleman and performed well enough. It was not the earth shattering event that I was so worried about. The fun with J was not to last and ended soon after, J had some other life issues that needed his attention. So she moved on to her next adventure a foray into a new world of discovery.

So what does everyone think of our journey so far I would love some feedback
I don’t know how to tell if people are reading what I post.

Ygt hubby wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 15, 2024 12:39 pm

So what does everyone think of our journey so far I would love some feedback
I don’t know how to tell if people are reading what I post.

Hi, it's not unusual to get low amounts of feedback. Especially early on in your story.
But, people will get to read it, and return for new installments.

If you like feedback then maybe don't 'splurge' your whole story in just a few installments. Allow people to get involved and your audience to slowly accumulate.

I'm certainly enjoying it. Please continue.
And thanks for taking the time to write it.

trecital wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 15, 2024 2:27 pm

Ygt hubby wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 15, 2024 12:39 pm

So what does everyone think of our journey so far I would love some feedback
I don’t know how to tell if people are reading what I post.

Hi, it's not unusual to get low amounts of feedback. Especially early on in your story.
But, people will get to read it, and return for new installments.

If you like feedback then maybe don't 'splurge' your whole story in just a few installments. Allow people to get involved and your audience to slowly accumulate.

I'm certainly enjoying it. Please continue.
And thanks for taking the time to write it.

Thank you for your response and for reading.
I’m grateful for the feedback I had not thought
About how I was posting as ‘splurging’ but I guess I was
Good point
Hopefully someone will read our journey and take something good out of it. Just like I have gotten from this site and all of you here.

Hi again. Just to be clear, I didn't think you had already 'splurged' your story.
I was thinking more about future possible posts. I suggest continuing to post it part at a time.
Also, you are responding to peoples comments, which is a good idea.

For greater feedback from others, and more readership in general, I think it's better to write your story in instalments, leaving a bit of time in between posts, to allow time for people to respond.

The Stag/Vixen forum is less well read than others, partially because it's newer, and partially (I think) because it's often less 'out there', extreme.
So, your story possibly has a smaller audience.
Having said all that, you are getting a decent number of 'views'.

Carry on posting, and I'm sure you'll get mre feedback.

I understand that it's nice to know that you are not just shouting into the void.

Sent you a pm....

Well as the weeks went by she began to discover some more men online that peaked her interest.
She was unsure of what I would think about her taste in men. She came to me with trepidation and showed me her hopeful next sexual partners.
To my surprise she had chosen several black men. My surprise was only because she had never mentioned an interest in black men.
I was perfectly ok with her choice in lovers and encouraged her to follow her journey through.
She began to text back and forth with several different guys she hit it off with a couple of them but one stood out “M”
M was a really nice man very kind and he appreciated plus sized women.
They texted each other for a while and eventually set up a time to meet and follow through with their attraction to each other.
She asked if I wanted to watch her and M together they had discussed it and he was ok with me being there.
The day finally came and we were both nervous as I had never seen her with another man. I wasn’t sure how I was going to react. While one part of me was turned on by what was about to happen another part was scared of what if I couldn’t watch. We found out soon enough that I was ok with it when I met M for the first time. He was a tall man thin with just enough muscle to fill him out. I could see why she would like him. He met us at a motel we had gotten it wasn’t anything special just a room.
As we weren’t there for the room service things heated up quickly. The two of them set out exploring each other and in short order they were both naked on the bed. The beauty of their bodies entwined was something to see. As they began having sex I felt nervous as I just sat there watching my wife with another man. It was a beautiful sight to see as she just let herself become one with him. The fact that his cock was nearly twice my size seamed to suit her just fine as he began to penetrate her. She seemed to come alive and became totally oblivious to anything around her. M and I had talked about doing a video but he asked me to wait until they really got into it. So when I saw her obviously enjoying herself I began to record. The sight was amazing as he thrust into her over and over making her scream with pleasure. He was gentle but not so much to allow her to think he wasn’t in control. She was totally lost in the moment and afterwards told me that she didn’t even realize I was there and taking video. I loved the fact that she was enjoying herself that much, that meant a lot to me. After all this whole thing was for her to experience that kind of pleasure.
As things wrapped up with M she was visibly happy with his performance her face was lit with a beautiful afterglow.
I was so proud of my wife and filled with such comperssion having witnessed her pleasure. If this was the feeling from knowing her happiness I was hooked. I had never thought I would feel this way about my wife having sex with another man but there it was. Thank goodness he was just one of the first, of many men to have

I am enjoying hearing about your perspective on your journey. My wife became a hotwife two years ago and it was filled with highs and lows. Like you, it took some time during the first six months to overcome the obstacles and emotions. I was also worried that she would fall in love with him and had a difficult time realizing that she and I are in this dynamic together and her love would never leave. Once I wrapped my head around that, we became closer than we've ever been in our 26 year marriage. She has a BF that she has been meeting for almost two years, and we both love and enjoy the fun he brings into our lives. Keep communicating, talk about insecurities and you won't regret your decision. I have journaled our entire journey on this website, and sometimes I wonder if anyone is listening. That's okay, look at the views you receive and realize that people are reading, just not responding. I am reading your journey and find it amazing.