Moving from lurking to participating
Posted: Thu Apr 18, 2024 11:13 am
We are a stag/vixen married couple in our mid-ish 30's. Fantasies around the idea started early in our relationship 15-ish years ago, and I believe we've been lurking on and off here just about the entire time.
Reading about everyone's desires and experiences really helped us define our own over time, so thank you all!
The journey from bedroom roleplaying to real life activity was one full of up and downs, starts and stops, and constant reshaping of ideas. Now that we've crossed that bridge, we're very grateful it took so long because I'm not sure either of use would have been emotionally mature enough to truly handle everything this lifestyle throws at your relationship in our early or even late 20's.
To be fair, she didn't struggle as much internally as I did. She's always just wanted two guys (or more) to worship her at the same time without any extra sauce (size, power play, cheating fantasy, etc). I had to come to terms with myself in this situation. Was it size? Did she want to cuck me? Did she want to cheat? Was I inadequate? Well, it was none of those things, and I was not any of those things either.
We're madly in love and have a very healthy one on one sexual relationship. We're both the best either of us has ever had, and that's still true today. It's just a lot easier to hit all the right buttons simultaneously with an extra mouth, hands, and tool haha.
Frankly, we'd probably be full on swingers if she didn't have previous trauma from past relationships or had a bit more interest in women.
Anyway, learning that the Stag/Vixen concept existed was really a game changer for us. It more closely resembled our dynamic and desires, and it feels comfortable to wear. Everything we do is above board and together, including between the sheets with a third. There is no competition. The third is my teammate, and our objective is simply to give her as much pleasure as possible. It's a ton of fun.
Finally, we're crossing over to participating to hopefully jump in and offer advice to others who considering making the transition. We are very aware our way is not the only way and respect everyone's flavors and kinks, but we can't help but to think some people might benefit from bending more our way than inviting some potentially explosive themes into their relationships, especially if that's not where her mindset ever was or is... So, just here to give a perspective that isn't quite as loud or prominent as some of the others. BUT again. Respect and props to you all regardless of your play preferences.
Reading about everyone's desires and experiences really helped us define our own over time, so thank you all!
The journey from bedroom roleplaying to real life activity was one full of up and downs, starts and stops, and constant reshaping of ideas. Now that we've crossed that bridge, we're very grateful it took so long because I'm not sure either of use would have been emotionally mature enough to truly handle everything this lifestyle throws at your relationship in our early or even late 20's.
To be fair, she didn't struggle as much internally as I did. She's always just wanted two guys (or more) to worship her at the same time without any extra sauce (size, power play, cheating fantasy, etc). I had to come to terms with myself in this situation. Was it size? Did she want to cuck me? Did she want to cheat? Was I inadequate? Well, it was none of those things, and I was not any of those things either.
We're madly in love and have a very healthy one on one sexual relationship. We're both the best either of us has ever had, and that's still true today. It's just a lot easier to hit all the right buttons simultaneously with an extra mouth, hands, and tool haha.
Frankly, we'd probably be full on swingers if she didn't have previous trauma from past relationships or had a bit more interest in women.
Anyway, learning that the Stag/Vixen concept existed was really a game changer for us. It more closely resembled our dynamic and desires, and it feels comfortable to wear. Everything we do is above board and together, including between the sheets with a third. There is no competition. The third is my teammate, and our objective is simply to give her as much pleasure as possible. It's a ton of fun.
Finally, we're crossing over to participating to hopefully jump in and offer advice to others who considering making the transition. We are very aware our way is not the only way and respect everyone's flavors and kinks, but we can't help but to think some people might benefit from bending more our way than inviting some potentially explosive themes into their relationships, especially if that's not where her mindset ever was or is... So, just here to give a perspective that isn't quite as loud or prominent as some of the others. BUT again. Respect and props to you all regardless of your play preferences.
