Asking GF to watch porn went wrong!

[Fapster69]

I'm definitely going to pump the breaks now that everything is out in the open! I still can't believe I actually told her!

I'll leave it a while and see if she ever brings it up I guess?

[Long Lurker 34]

I'm definitely going to pump the breaks now that everything is out in the open! I still can't believe I actually told her!

I'll leave it a while and see if she ever brings it up I guess?

F69 - It will be interesting to see which one of you "breaks" first when out in public. In that which one of you will point out to the other a black guy you think might "be her type."

[Fapster69]

I'm definitely going to pump the breaks now that everything is out in the open! I still can't believe I actually told her!

I'll leave it a while and see if she ever brings it up I guess?

F69 - It will be interesting to see which one of you "breaks" first when out in public. In that which one of you will point out to the other a black guy you think might "be her type."

I doubt she will ever bring it up again unless she has had a few drinks! I need to find another way to broach the subject when we are sober!

[Long Lurker 34]

I'm definitely going to pump the breaks now that everything is out in the open! I still can't believe I actually told her!

I'll leave it a while and see if she ever brings it up I guess?

F69 - It will be interesting to see which one of you "breaks" first when out in public. In that which one of you will point out to the other a black guy you think might "be her type."

I doubt she will ever bring it up again unless she has had a few drinks! I need to find another way to broach the subject when we are sober!

F69 - All YOU need to do is a slight tap with an elbow and perhaps a slight clearing of the throat.

[Fapster69]

F69 - All YOU need to do is a slight tap with an elbow and perhaps a slight clearing of the throat.

I made a joke about putting one of the videos on that I showed her the other night and she said, "absolutely not! "

The fact she can laugh about it is a good thing right?

[Long Lurker 34]

F69 - All YOU need to do is a slight tap with an elbow and perhaps a slight clearing of the throat.

I made a joke about putting one of the videos on that I showed her the other night and she said, "absolutely not! "

The fact she can laugh about it is a good thing right?

F69 - Or, as you stated, let sometime pass and nothing. Then when you know she is around and coming to bed?, put some head phones on and play a video you think might be of the correct content and wait for her to come in the room and "surprise" you. You'll either get a possible replay or totally shot down.

[Fapster69]

Today we watched porn again during sex and she was totally cool with it!

I put on a video where the hotwife looks like my girlfriend and my gf said, “my ass is better than hers! ” She then criticised the bedding in the video and said surely I could find a better video than this!

She’s went from hating porn to saying my porn isn’t good enough!! Now that she’s open to watching porn I need to sit down with her and find out what she’s into!

She also said to me, “I love how you say you want to watch me have sex, but if I turned around and said I’ve found someone you would panic! ”

I said, “do you have someone in mind? ” and she said no, she was just making a point. I then said if for “talking sake” it was really to happen, then it should be with someone from out of town (so no-one finds out).

She said she will never do it in real life but is fully open to indulging my fantasies during sex!

I don’t know where to go from here! I want to play around with the fantasy a bit more before I tell her I am actually serious about it!

She asked how I got into this fetish and I said I watched a video one day and was hooked! I told her I love watching her in action! She has sent me nudes before and I said that’s why I love your nudes too, you are a goddess to me and I love to look!

[TheHammer]

The door is now open, but enter carefully. Propose something benign like going to a bar but entering and sitting separately and you can watch guy’s approach her. You don’t even have to call it flirting. It’s just guys talking to her.

[Fapster69]

The door is now open, but enter carefully. Propose something benign like going to a bar but entering and sitting separately and you can watch guy’s approach her. You don’t even have to call it flirting. It’s just guys talking to her.

That’s a good idea!

I’m going to propose sharing a few of her nudes online and showing her mens reactions to them! She was against this in the past but now that she’s indulging my fantasy she might be more open to it! Seeing their comments might awaken something in her!

[Long Lurker 34]

Today we watched porn again during sex and she was totally cool with it!

I put on a video where the hotwife looks like my girlfriend and my gf said, “my ass is better than hers! ” She then criticised the bedding in the video and said surely I could find a better video than this!

She’s went from hating porn to saying my porn isn’t good enough!! Now that she’s open to watching porn I need to sit down with her and find out what she’s into!

She also said to me, “I love how you say you want to watch me have sex, but if I turned around and said I’ve found someone you would panic! ”

I said, “do you have someone in mind? ” and she said no, she was just making a point. I then said if for “talking sake” it was really to happen, then it should be with someone from out of town (so no-one finds out).

She said she will never do it in real life but is fully open to indulging my fantasies during sex!

I don’t know where to go from here! I want to play around with the fantasy a bit more before I tell her I am actually serious about it!

She asked how I got into this fetish and I said I watched a video one day and was hooked! I told her I love watching her in action! She has sent me nudes before and I said that’s why I love your nudes too, you are a goddess to me and I love to look!

F69 - I would say a good start would be having a casual talk about what her "type" is. Then when you are out together (timing and mood are everything of course) you could give her a nudge, nod "Does he fit the bill?" , or some other appropriate comment.

[irishmusicman]

I've seen several posts here where the wife/gf says no way and then (years later) changes her mind for one reason or another. Doesn't sound like she'll change her mind soon, but with enough baby steps you might see that wall come down. I'm lucky in that even though she's still processing it my wife seems very receptive to the idea as long as she's convinced I won't get hurt. We're going to have a talk on the 30th when she gets back from a short vacation and has had time to process her thoughts and concerns.

[PlayboyFan]

The door is now open, but enter carefully. Propose something benign like going to a bar but entering and sitting separately and you can watch guy’s approach her. You don’t even have to call it flirting. It’s just guys talking to her.

That’s a good idea!

going to propose sharing a few of her nudes online and showing her mens reactions to them! She was against this in the past but now that she’s indulging my fantasy she might be more open to it! Seeing their comments might awaken something in her!

Fascinating progress here Fapster. LOL. It’s almost like you are accidentally falling into progress that many never achieve with well thought out plans!

Seriously, you are very lucky. I was there once. It took me much longer to achieve even remotely the cooperation you are getting from your lovely wife…(GF?) I cant remember.

I’m impressed with your gutsiness. I recall the sheer terror.

If I can make one small suggestion…..consider taking her out to a nice quiet dinner and having a non-horny discussion where you can discuss your desires with her with a more…..rational…..approach. Trying to convey to her, and decipher WITH her where the origins of the fantasies came from, etc.

Its important that you convey that this is a fantasy you very much desire to experience WITH her….together…..as part of your maturing and developing sexual life together. Done tactfully, I think you have progressed to the point where you two can have non-horny, rational discussions.

The reason is, if its always discussed in the heat of the moment, then it will be harder for her to grasp the potential realities and get to her fears that inevitably hold her back. And make no mistake…..it is decades of social conditioning she is going to have to fight and overcome before hotwifing for real is a possibility. That is unlikely to happen if its always broached in the middle of passion.

Finally, when it comes to taking the step between fantasy and reality…..that simply will not happen until an actual, real other man has become a possibility. You can wind her up and get her to fantasize until the cows come home, but it will remain a fantasy until a real man is in her realm of possibility. That is often easier said than done.

My suggestion is, since she is open to playing games with you…..ask her to join you and you both create an anonymous profile of a dating/hookup app with a few non-identifiable photos of her. She will start getting messages and there will be plenty of nutty messages, dick pics, total losers, etc. You both will be able to have good many laughs at many of the respondents.

However……there will be one….or two……that she wont laugh at. Somebody she finds attractive and charming will ask to message her, and then call her…..and then ask to meet her for coffee.

That….will be the point where this takes its most significant leap. Trust me.

PBF

[Fapster69]

Fascinating progress here Fapster. LOL. It’s almost like you are accidentally falling into progress that many never achieve with well thought out plans!

Seriously, you are very lucky. I was there once. It took me much longer to achieve even remotely the cooperation you are getting from your lovely wife…(GF?) I cant remember.

I’m impressed with your gutsiness. I recall the sheer terror.

We've been together 10+ years now so we're at the point where we can tell each other anything!

It was still extremely difficult to come out with but I'm glad it finally worked and she was eventually receptive to it!

I think the main thing for her is that she doesn't want me using this as an opportunity to sleep with other women! She has been extremely loyal to me through our whole relationship, so I think me telling her this fantasy was out of left field because I had never once hinted at it in the time we've been together!

I think the next step will definitely be getting her speaking to people online. I'd rather we started slowly like that instead of jumping straight into real life meetups!

[PlayboyFan]

Fascinating progress here Fapster. LOL. It’s almost like you are accidentally falling into progress that many never achieve with well thought out plans!

Seriously, you are very lucky. I was there once. It took me much longer to achieve even remotely the cooperation you are getting from your lovely wife…(GF?) I cant remember.

I’m impressed with your gutsiness. I recall the sheer terror.

We've been together 10+ years now so we're at the point where we can tell each other anything!

It was still extremely difficult to come out with but I'm glad it finally worked and she was eventually receptive to it!

I think the main thing for her is that she doesn't want me using this as an opportunity to sleep with other women! She has been extremely loyal to me through our whole relationship, so I think me telling her this fantasy was out of left field because I had never once hinted at it in the time we've been together!

I think the next step will definitely be getting her speaking to people online. I'd rather we started slowly like that instead of jumping straight into real life meetups!

Yes. Highly recommended. Its easily anonymous, which allows it to be another step forward but harmless fun if approached correctly.

The effect of the fun and the flattery she will receive cannot be overstated. She will get compliments and invitations etc. That is when you will see a difference. Trust me.

Good luck on this next step.

PBF

[Fapster69]

I messed up again and went a little too hard!

Tried some of the dirty talk I'd tried before when we were having sex yesterday, but it went down badly this time!

She said she was worried that I was bored of having sex and that is why I am coming out with all of this! We split up in the past and she is worried I'm bored and all of this is me trying to find a way out!

She said she is worried that my fantasies aren't actually fantasies then said she is done with it and wants to just have normal sex from now on.

I am absolutely not bored of her, in fact I am happier than ever, which I told her of course! And obviously my relationship is more important so I said I will stop completely with it all and carry on as we were before I brought this up.

After our talk she felt much better then told me that she will be open again to this fantasy stuff but again said that she is not used to all of this and it's hard for her after being vanilla for so long!

Basically the long and short of it seems to be that my girl isn't stupid and knows deep down that I am semi serious about it even though I say it's just fantasy! She said she could never do something like that because it would feel like cheating on me and that I should be lucky that she thinks that way! I honestly don't know how to proceed from here...

[leander99]

You have probably pushed too much. A very common mistake.

Stop talking about it for as long as is needed. It will simmer in her head, and maybe the idea will take root.

Also it is very possible that she is not as against it as she says now. Women go through fases, she may be les adamant tomorrow. Particularly of she got tired of being pushed into something she is not (yet) sonl sure off.

For women this is often a huge leap to take. Amd she has to be 900% sure you will not get angry at her and leave her if she actually ever dares take that jump

[PlayboyFan]

Again, and I cannot stress enough…..if you want this to become a reality….it simply will NEVER really progress until there is an actual man that is interested in her.

All the bedroom fantasy talk is just fun hot air to be honest.It is NOT a harbinger of her beginning acceptance of hotwifing. It literally means nothing other than some harmless fun. Perhaps it means a wife is aware of the concept. That and five dollars will get you a cup of coffee.

My wife has been playing now for over a year and a half and STILL won’t engage in much dirty bedroom talk.

You can read hundreds and hundreds of threads here, where a wife will entertain her husbands fantasy all night long with hotwife dirty talk and fantasy, but absolutely NEVER progress to making it a reality. Thats the cold hard truth. Its the most common thread you see.

You had made good progress and now most likely caught her at just the wrong moment where she just wasn’t feeling like playing. Oh well….honestly….no big deal.

Guess what? Her poor reaction at that moment is no more a “bad” sign than it would have been had she played along was a “good” sign. Neither really means much.

Drop the talking to her about it in passionate moments. Its not truly beneficial. This last episode will fade. Focus on getting her something to make the possibility real. A message from a real guy who flatters her by demonstrating he want to chat, call, or meet her for coffee will change the dynamic faster than you can imagine.

She can play hotwife fantasy games every night for a year and you wouldn't be a step closer to reality. Find a way where some nice looking guy sends her a message and asks her to coffee one afternoon.

THAT….should be you focus.

Good luck.

PBF

[Outlaw]

Dude, it decision time. She is or she isn't. Fast pull on the bandaid

[KevDi69]

F69, remember the tale of the tortoise and the hare. Slow and steady wins the race. As much as we would all like to see you making quick progress towards your goal, going slow, may be the best approach. Give her time to fully acclimate to the idea. You can have a lot of fun along the way as you progress along with her. Play with little victories, such as when you go to a bar and a man flirts with her and you can kid her about it. Then she’ll know that you’re not jealous of other men.
You may want to try reading stories about the slow progress, that other couples make on their journey to hotwifeing. Find some good ones and leave them open on your computer where she can see them. Give her the opportunity to read them on her own and might plant more seeds. Good luck and thanks for sharing.

[Fapster69]

F69, remember the tale of the tortoise and the hare. Slow and steady wins the race. As much as we would all like to see you making quick progress towards your goal, going slow, may be the best approach. Give her time to fully acclimate to the idea. You can have a lot of fun along the way as you progress along with her. Play with little victories, such as when you go to a bar and a man flirts with her and you can kid her about it. Then she’ll know that you’re not jealous of other men.
You may want to try reading stories about the slow progress, that other couples make on their journey to hotwifeing. Find some good ones and leave them open on your computer where she can see them. Give her the opportunity to read them on her own and might plant more seeds. Good luck and thanks for sharing.

Yeah that guy saying to rush and give her an ultimatum didn't have the best advice!

I was looking through my history and the GF had googled...

"is it normal that your boyfriend asks you to sleep with someone else"
"boyfriend fantasizing about me sleeping with someone else"
"boyfriend dreams about me cheating"

The first thing she googled comes up with a quora page and the top answer is...

"“Normal” is bullshit. It can change in time, by culture, geography and personal experience.

If your boyfriend gets a kick out of imagining you having sex with other people, that can mean that you became his fave porn star. Congratulations!

That does not mean he loves you any less or he's willing to give you up. But some people (perhaps more than the people willing to admit it) enjoy imagining or actually witnessing their partners having sex with other people. There may be multiple factors contributing to this but try to accept it as it is if you're enjoying it as well, even though it may not be classified as “normal” depending on what are the “norms” in your local culture. Your private life is nobody else's business so it's useless to compare it to the “norms” of the rest of the society."

Thank god the guy answering was open minded, hopefully she took it in! At least she is doing her research I guess!

[Fapster69]

We had another amazing night this weekend!

After a night out on the town we came home tipsy and I tried the porn thing again! This time she properly started playing along and even started shit talking me!

We watched a few interracial scenes, even the leadup to a gangbang and I just kept saying, "imagine that was you, do you think you could handle it?" and she replied, "of course" or, "easily" to every single scene with a smirk on her face.

I told her that I loved her playing along and said, "you are getting better at this dirty talk! "

During one scene she said with a smirk, "what if I decided I like this black guy better and decide to leave you for him? "

I then put on a hotwife video with a white bull and she was shocked and said "howcome this guy is white?"

I said, "why are you disappointed?" She said she just thought it was an interracial fetish I had!

She was soaking wet the entire time we were playing while watching these videos, more wet than she's ever been so I know she loves it secretly!

In the morning she is always super embarrassed and says she only liked it because she was tipsy.

I guess I just need to persist with what I've been doing because I feel like I'm making more forward progress than backwards! I just need to get her on good days!

[Abrandnewstart194]

She had been trying to come to terms with your kink, and it sounds like she came a long way. Don’t push it. Accept her face saving excuse that it was just because she had been drinking, and wait. Let her enjoy the experience without embarrassment the next day, and she’ll be more likely to repeat it until she isn’t embarrassed, and is willing to admit that she likes the fantasy.

Once she feels safe engaging in the fantasy, it’s only a matter of time before she may start thinking bout making it real.

[Fapster69]

She took a little convincing but she let me order a dildo for her! I decided to go big or go home so got this huge black dildo!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqQlgJfKXBo

I can’t wait till it arrives!! We’ve never played with dildos before so I might have overdid it with the size!

I’m sure we’ll be able to make it fit and get some good photos!!

I joked that at our next hotel visit we will have a guest with us (this dildo) and that she will need to come up with a name for it!

[Shantideva]

Great update and great progress. That dildo looks huge!

This is the one I got for my wife, which she was intimidated by at first, but now loves: https://www.fukena.com/millionaire.html

[Fapster69]

She is slowly but surely getting comfortable with the idea of taking a BBC!

We are from the UK and we were out driving a few days ago. We have a radio station here called Radio 1 and occasionally it says "BBC Radio 1". We both looked at each other with a smirk and she said "You have ruined black guys for me! I can't look at a black guy now without..." and she never finished the sentence! I said, "You can't look at a black guy without what? " but she laughed and never elaborated any further!