First Post from a Wannabe
Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2025 6:12 pm
Trying this one again as would love some responses/advice.
Long post alert.
Firstly Hello to all on the Forum. I've been lurking for a few weeks and getting brave enough to put a proper post up.
I'm H, 53yr Old Male, my wife S and 47. We've been married for 20 years. We were 31 and 25 when we first met so both of us were sexually experienced, and both had a relatively high number of partners, mainly one-night stands. We both settled and have been monogamous since.
It would be about 15 years ago that we started to discuss fantasies involving other partners. It started as being another woman as S was interested in playing with a woman, something she had never done. We even tried to do it one night after a few drinks, but didn't manage to find anybody suitable. It was probably for the best looking back, as we hadn't properly discussed it, and had a lot to drink. Over the next few years the fantasy developed and fuelled our sex life. We would both talk about having a 3rd party in bed with us, and that eventually turned into that person being a man and all attention being focused on S.
When I pressed the question of whether we should do it, S wasn't comfortable as felt that it would be cheating and breaking our wedding vows. My feeling on this is that it wouldn't be if it was something we both agreed on. Her other worry is body related. We're both a few pounds over the weight we would like to be, and she feels that other men wouldn't find her attractive or like her body.
When S turned 40 she went away with the girls, and I told her that she had a free pass to do anything she wanted. She jokingly called me a pervert, and asked would I really want somebody else to sleep with her. I told her I would, and would want to hear every detail. I explained how much I wanted it to happen and how I would feel. She didn't understand what I would get out of it, but my explanation made more sense. Long story short, she ended up kissing and touching with a guy when she was pretty drunk. He felt her ass while they kissed and she felt guilty afterwards. When she got home we talked it over and ended up having the best sex we'd had in years. We decided then that we would allow kissing with other people at any time, however I reiterated that my agreement for her to go all the way at any point was permanent.
I ended up having a similar experience, kissing and touching, with a girl in a club on a weekend in Germany. Once again it ended in passionate sex with S when I got home, it seemed to really fire her up. It seems that doung naughty stuff with others turns us both on. The fantasy often comes up in bed, although S often says she wouldn't actually go through with it.
The most recent developments have been interesting. S has recently allowed me to take pictures of her naked, then leading to much more explicit ones of us having sex. We then bought a dildo and once again talked about that being another man in our bed. She really enjoyed having that inside her while she went down on me. I would talk dirty about her taking two men at once. One of her great fantasies has been to have a black man, something she has never done thus far. This opened up discussion as to whether it would be something she would go through with if we could make it happen. She once again objected bit mainly because of her body. It is still something we are discussing when in the right place.
Sorry it was a long one, but I wanted to tell you all where we are, and what brought me here. Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated.
Long post alert.
Firstly Hello to all on the Forum. I've been lurking for a few weeks and getting brave enough to put a proper post up.
I'm H, 53yr Old Male, my wife S and 47. We've been married for 20 years. We were 31 and 25 when we first met so both of us were sexually experienced, and both had a relatively high number of partners, mainly one-night stands. We both settled and have been monogamous since.
It would be about 15 years ago that we started to discuss fantasies involving other partners. It started as being another woman as S was interested in playing with a woman, something she had never done. We even tried to do it one night after a few drinks, but didn't manage to find anybody suitable. It was probably for the best looking back, as we hadn't properly discussed it, and had a lot to drink. Over the next few years the fantasy developed and fuelled our sex life. We would both talk about having a 3rd party in bed with us, and that eventually turned into that person being a man and all attention being focused on S.
When I pressed the question of whether we should do it, S wasn't comfortable as felt that it would be cheating and breaking our wedding vows. My feeling on this is that it wouldn't be if it was something we both agreed on. Her other worry is body related. We're both a few pounds over the weight we would like to be, and she feels that other men wouldn't find her attractive or like her body.
When S turned 40 she went away with the girls, and I told her that she had a free pass to do anything she wanted. She jokingly called me a pervert, and asked would I really want somebody else to sleep with her. I told her I would, and would want to hear every detail. I explained how much I wanted it to happen and how I would feel. She didn't understand what I would get out of it, but my explanation made more sense. Long story short, she ended up kissing and touching with a guy when she was pretty drunk. He felt her ass while they kissed and she felt guilty afterwards. When she got home we talked it over and ended up having the best sex we'd had in years. We decided then that we would allow kissing with other people at any time, however I reiterated that my agreement for her to go all the way at any point was permanent.
I ended up having a similar experience, kissing and touching, with a girl in a club on a weekend in Germany. Once again it ended in passionate sex with S when I got home, it seemed to really fire her up. It seems that doung naughty stuff with others turns us both on. The fantasy often comes up in bed, although S often says she wouldn't actually go through with it.
The most recent developments have been interesting. S has recently allowed me to take pictures of her naked, then leading to much more explicit ones of us having sex. We then bought a dildo and once again talked about that being another man in our bed. She really enjoyed having that inside her while she went down on me. I would talk dirty about her taking two men at once. One of her great fantasies has been to have a black man, something she has never done thus far. This opened up discussion as to whether it would be something she would go through with if we could make it happen. She once again objected bit mainly because of her body. It is still something we are discussing when in the right place.
Sorry it was a long one, but I wanted to tell you all where we are, and what brought me here. Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated.