Sort of a Wannabe
Posted: Thu Oct 16, 2025 10:14 am
Long time lurker first time poster.
I'm posting this in the Wannabe forum as it's been a couple years since anything has happened. We have played together as a couple -- swinging mostly where we swapped with other couple -- but have had 2 experiences with single guys that really turned me on.
The first guy we sought out on an app was interesting. We had some text conversations and then arranged to meet at a bar. We invited him to our hotel and had some soft fun -- he stayed the night and in the morning my wife had her first experience with sleeping with someone besides me since we were married. For those that like the details, she first took him missionary then doggie then cowgirl while I watched. She finished him off orally then we went our separate ways. She did see him one other time without me but nothing really happened as it was a public meeting and he came to one show when I was playing in a band. Anyway, he had some quirks that turned her off so we had a discussion about not having a repeat performance. We heard from him a few times then one day we found his obituary online. Not sure what happened.
The second guy wasn't successful at all. He paid no attention to what my wife needed and just wanted to get off. So while she did sleep with him doggie, it was quick and we don't revisit that experience.
The swinging with another couple happened after that -- we met a great couple and had good chemistry. We had several date nights that ended up in a full swap of partners. That has ended and I blame myself -- I got so turned on by seeing her have sex with the other guy (and the other woman) that I didn't perform very well with their partner and I assume she lost interest.
Anyway, at this point nothing has been going on and it's been a few years. We've continued to share fantasies but she's made it clear that things would remain just as fantasies. Recently, however, we've been fantasizing about a guy that lives out of town (would require a plane trip to see him). He is someone we both knew at an old job a lot of years ago that I think has always wanted to get in my wife's pants (she would agree with that statement). He's been celibate for a couple years (not by choice) as he is the primary caregiver for his father with dementia and doesn't have time to date. We joked that she needed to go see him and help him out with his interpersonal "problems".
I've encouraged her but it's stayed as just a fantasy -- but this morning something happened that surprised me...she brought it up out of the blue and asked if she needed to contact him about helping him out. I encouraged the thoughts but it didn't go beyond that. I know they have some sort of text interaction on a semi-regular basis and she shares some of the content of his messages but I'm not sure everything gets shared (and I'm ok with that). While I've been supportive of the idea, I don't want to push as I want it to be something that she wants and not something she is doing for me. That said, I've been beside myself all morning thinking about it. It would be amazing if she would go visit him for a weekend and share stories with me about her escapades.
Anyways, I needed to get that out -- thank you for providing a forum for me to do that. I would love to see her take a trip and experience another man without me watching. There would be a lot to work out before she went -- interactions while she was with him, aftercare, etc. -- and I don't know if it will ever happen but I'm hopeful.
I'm posting this in the Wannabe forum as it's been a couple years since anything has happened. We have played together as a couple -- swinging mostly where we swapped with other couple -- but have had 2 experiences with single guys that really turned me on.
The first guy we sought out on an app was interesting. We had some text conversations and then arranged to meet at a bar. We invited him to our hotel and had some soft fun -- he stayed the night and in the morning my wife had her first experience with sleeping with someone besides me since we were married. For those that like the details, she first took him missionary then doggie then cowgirl while I watched. She finished him off orally then we went our separate ways. She did see him one other time without me but nothing really happened as it was a public meeting and he came to one show when I was playing in a band. Anyway, he had some quirks that turned her off so we had a discussion about not having a repeat performance. We heard from him a few times then one day we found his obituary online. Not sure what happened.
The second guy wasn't successful at all. He paid no attention to what my wife needed and just wanted to get off. So while she did sleep with him doggie, it was quick and we don't revisit that experience.
The swinging with another couple happened after that -- we met a great couple and had good chemistry. We had several date nights that ended up in a full swap of partners. That has ended and I blame myself -- I got so turned on by seeing her have sex with the other guy (and the other woman) that I didn't perform very well with their partner and I assume she lost interest.
Anyway, at this point nothing has been going on and it's been a few years. We've continued to share fantasies but she's made it clear that things would remain just as fantasies. Recently, however, we've been fantasizing about a guy that lives out of town (would require a plane trip to see him). He is someone we both knew at an old job a lot of years ago that I think has always wanted to get in my wife's pants (she would agree with that statement). He's been celibate for a couple years (not by choice) as he is the primary caregiver for his father with dementia and doesn't have time to date. We joked that she needed to go see him and help him out with his interpersonal "problems".
I've encouraged her but it's stayed as just a fantasy -- but this morning something happened that surprised me...she brought it up out of the blue and asked if she needed to contact him about helping him out. I encouraged the thoughts but it didn't go beyond that. I know they have some sort of text interaction on a semi-regular basis and she shares some of the content of his messages but I'm not sure everything gets shared (and I'm ok with that). While I've been supportive of the idea, I don't want to push as I want it to be something that she wants and not something she is doing for me. That said, I've been beside myself all morning thinking about it. It would be amazing if she would go visit him for a weekend and share stories with me about her escapades.
Anyways, I needed to get that out -- thank you for providing a forum for me to do that. I would love to see her take a trip and experience another man without me watching. There would be a lot to work out before she went -- interactions while she was with him, aftercare, etc. -- and I don't know if it will ever happen but I'm hopeful.