A question for the mature ladies who’ve come through Menopause
How was your sex drive after emerging from the difficult time of menopause ? Did you find sex as enjoyable as before ? We’ve read that most women tend to suffer a decline in both sexual arousal and desire … Although, there are some whose appetite increased substantially.
Please sure your experiences and any advice …
Kind regards,
L&E
Menopause
Re: Menopause
Hi, I went through early menopause in my mid 40's, had a good appetite for sex prior to the change. For 6-7 months prior to me starting menopause I had a massive influx of hormones, my sex drive went through the roof. I would get home from work around midnight and demand my sleeping husband use me and get me to orgasim before I would go to sleep.
This was when we started in the hotwife lifestyle, my husband told me that I was too hard to keep up with and wanted me to be satified at all times, so we looked around and we both agreed on a friend of ours that was recently divorced.
Then I started menopause, it was like day and night, I didn't want anybody to touch me, come near me, my mood swings were wild, looking back my husband was extremely patient, it took me the best part of 5 years before I settled down.
Once my hormones were under control, I began wanting to have sex on a regular basis again, but still not being a nympho like I had been just prior to menopause.
I found I would actuially become aroused and wet on occassions, but most times my husband would need to either have to use lube to make intercourse comfortable or lick me and lube me with his spit.
Over the years I have now become extremely sexual , I actually initiate sex more often than not these days, I just love sex again.
No more worrying about getting pregnant, periods etc, never have to track my cycle to make sure that I'm not out of action when we want to go and play.
These days my husband just loves the attention, we have now gone back to me playing a friend of ours when I feel the urge.
I still have issues with self lubing, I came across a product called SKYN, Excite Gel, I has become a game changer.
I put a small amont on my clit when I am going to play and I am simply dripping when I am being aroused.
Not only does my husbamnd love it but our friend can't believe how wet I become.
Also anothe bonus is I would have 1 maybe 2 orgasims prior to menopause and I was completely satisfied, these days I demand up to 4-5 orgasims evrytime I play.
Not all are earth shattering , but very satisfying, but at least 3 of them are leg/ body shaking , very enjoyable,
So don't fear the menopause, just be prepared for the mood swings
All the best, Karry
This was when we started in the hotwife lifestyle, my husband told me that I was too hard to keep up with and wanted me to be satified at all times, so we looked around and we both agreed on a friend of ours that was recently divorced.
Then I started menopause, it was like day and night, I didn't want anybody to touch me, come near me, my mood swings were wild, looking back my husband was extremely patient, it took me the best part of 5 years before I settled down.
Once my hormones were under control, I began wanting to have sex on a regular basis again, but still not being a nympho like I had been just prior to menopause.
I found I would actuially become aroused and wet on occassions, but most times my husband would need to either have to use lube to make intercourse comfortable or lick me and lube me with his spit.
Over the years I have now become extremely sexual , I actually initiate sex more often than not these days, I just love sex again.
No more worrying about getting pregnant, periods etc, never have to track my cycle to make sure that I'm not out of action when we want to go and play.
These days my husband just loves the attention, we have now gone back to me playing a friend of ours when I feel the urge.
I still have issues with self lubing, I came across a product called SKYN, Excite Gel, I has become a game changer.
I put a small amont on my clit when I am going to play and I am simply dripping when I am being aroused.
Not only does my husbamnd love it but our friend can't believe how wet I become.
Also anothe bonus is I would have 1 maybe 2 orgasims prior to menopause and I was completely satisfied, these days I demand up to 4-5 orgasims evrytime I play.
Not all are earth shattering , but very satisfying, but at least 3 of them are leg/ body shaking , very enjoyable,
So don't fear the menopause, just be prepared for the mood swings
All the best, Karry
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HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Thanks for your helpful reply, Karry ( much appreciated ).
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
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HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Thanks for your helpful reply, Karry ( much appreciated ).
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
-
HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Thanks for your helpful reply, Karry ( much appreciated ).
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
-
HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Thanks for your helpful reply, Karry ( much appreciated ).
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
-
HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Thanks for your helpful reply, Karry ( much appreciated ).
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
It’s been a real struggle this last year. I’ve remained a caring and supportive partner to my insanely sexy partner, but in many ways it’s as if the guy’s situation isn’t much of a consideration any more, tbh. The focus is purely on the woman and how terrible it all is and the man’s job is just to support every whim or mood swing, without comment or emotion. It’s almost as if there’s an expectation that he should just ‘suck it up’ and not complain or usurp her obvious difficulties because ‘he’s not going through it’ after all. But the truth he IS going through it, isn’t he ?! Truth is, I support her through the highs n lows and often wear my emotional bullet proof vest daily because of the particularly sharp moments where she’s taken unwarranted aim at me. I do all I can to make the situations manageable - literally trying to be supportive in every conceivable way.
However, I’ve fast approached a point of burn out now, sadly … Because she has switched off with all intimacy the expectation is I should somehow magically do this to … I can’t and my needs are there in the same way. Although I try to be what she needs, as mine are no longer being met, it’s making the situation hard to cope and I’m close to calling it quits after fourteen years. I need to take care of me too and this has all gotten lost with the expectations I’ve been putting up with … I can’t do it any longer.
Re: Menopause
I'm not a doctor, but it sure sounds to me like HRT ought to be considered. IIRC some people here have discussed it here on the forums, and some said it was miraculous. There have been some members around here who are MDs. Maybe if they're around, they can comment. It may be that you don't simply have to endure this indefinitely, and/or consider anything as drastic as ending things (yet).
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HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
Hi LeggySandy ( my, that screen name conjured up a wealth of wonderful images 
).
Thanks for your reply. I think she’s considering looking at HRT as the moods swings can be quite alarmingly erratic above all else !
And of course, ending things I’m quite sure would never be wanted, but I think we all have our breaking point, tbh …
I’ll def scour the forums for further insight, though.
Thanks again :-)
).Thanks for your reply. I think she’s considering looking at HRT as the moods swings can be quite alarmingly erratic above all else !
And of course, ending things I’m quite sure would never be wanted, but I think we all have our breaking point, tbh …
I’ll def scour the forums for further insight, though.
Thanks again :-)
Re: Menopause
There are a couple of threads in the Misc forum, although I'm not sure either of those are the discussion I remember reading
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=75346
Someone should explicitly acknowledge this though: It's not her fault. It's happening to her (and to you, by extension). As long as she can recognize that it's causing problems, and be open to exploring remedies.
viewtopic.php?f=13&t=75346
Someone should explicitly acknowledge this though: It's not her fault. It's happening to her (and to you, by extension). As long as she can recognize that it's causing problems, and be open to exploring remedies.
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HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
… It’s not her fault in anyway, Sandy, and I totally agree ( did indirectly elude to this in one of the responses ). It’s just one of those things that as a species one half of the equation has to physically go through. The impact is both mental and emotional on both sides thereafter and so being loving and supportive is utterly critical, but so is understanding and work-throughs on both sides. Once you love somebody, it’s oft an all-consuming thing and you will bat for them n every conceivable way …
I will follow the link you left for us … and deep gratitude once again.
I will follow the link you left for us … and deep gratitude once again.
Re: Menopause
Maybe try HRT, I tried it but had massive reactions, from bleeding, to unbelievable nausea, even worse mood swings than without it.
Just had to get off it, my MD and specialist tried quite a few different doses , but nothing helped.
Tried a few natural medicines , some seemed to help.
My Daughter is 44 in a few months and she is now beginning menopause already, not a thing I would wish on my worse enemy.
Good luck, I know it is a terrible time for you both, but maybe some pain now will be rewarded with an amazing life after she comes out the other side.
I know we had some really hard times when I went through, but we now have the most amazing sex life, I am basicly insatable these days and more relaxed than any other time in my life.
We have a brilliant time together and Glenn, loves either arranging friends to join us , or letting me arrange friends to play with solo, all with Glenn's blessings.
He gets so excited when I am getting ready to either go out to meet or have friends coming to our home.
I really wish you all the best. Karry xo
Just had to get off it, my MD and specialist tried quite a few different doses , but nothing helped.
Tried a few natural medicines , some seemed to help.
My Daughter is 44 in a few months and she is now beginning menopause already, not a thing I would wish on my worse enemy.
Good luck, I know it is a terrible time for you both, but maybe some pain now will be rewarded with an amazing life after she comes out the other side.
I know we had some really hard times when I went through, but we now have the most amazing sex life, I am basicly insatable these days and more relaxed than any other time in my life.
We have a brilliant time together and Glenn, loves either arranging friends to join us , or letting me arrange friends to play with solo, all with Glenn's blessings.
He gets so excited when I am getting ready to either go out to meet or have friends coming to our home.
I really wish you all the best. Karry xo
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HappyMan1212
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 14
- Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2024 3:15 pm
Re: Menopause
… Thanks, Karry.
I hope it resolves swiftish, but I love my woman so will worth through it whatever way we can ( until I can’t anyway ).
Thanks for sharing your experience too - it just adds further insight to how hard this time of life can be.
I hope it resolves swiftish, but I love my woman so will worth through it whatever way we can ( until I can’t anyway ).
Thanks for sharing your experience too - it just adds further insight to how hard this time of life can be.
Re: Menopause
My partner went through this and tried everything. Nothing worked. She has zero libido. I love her, but the assumption is that I am also now no longer interested. It was terrible for her, she suffered all the mood swings, change in body etc… but I also lost something. I truly don’t know if we win ever be intimate again and that makes me extremely sad.