Do your kids/parents/family/friends know about your Lifestyle?

[ozguy113]

Do your kids/parents/family/friends know about your lifestyle?

If so, how did they find out?
What was the reaction?
Were you shamed? High fived? Scorned? Respected?

We've gone out of our way to keep a low profile. I think our (adult) kids may have suspected something, but it's never been discussed. I have told a very few close buddies, and they think I'm the luckiest bastard in the world.

[bbarnsworth]

None of our nuclear or extended family know , nor will they know. It's possible one of our kids suspects, but only because said kid rifled through our drawers and found a topically related DVD (now in a landfill somewhere). We figured its none of our family's business, and if we told one the entire family would know...which would create problems. On occasion, family has watched our kids when they were young when we went out for non-monogamous dates. But, they never knew what we were really doing.

Two friends do know.

The first was completely surprised and really happy for it. Practically high fived

The second is having a very hard time wrapping her head around it. There's no scorn, disrespect, or judgment. She just doesn't understand it.

[noreaster]

Due to a drastic turn in her health there is no longer any playing of any sort. But before that a very good friend of ours knew because he was the first one to be with her several times when she was first shared. I also have a brother that knew because he was one of her longest term FWB. There were a handful of others she was with off and on over the years but the only two that we were, and still are, close to.

[Tank Turner]

The only people who know are my wife's sister and her husband. Her husband and his first wife were swingers. My wife's sister and her husband have attended sex parties.

My wife tells her sister and brother-in-law everything.

[MarknSusan]

Our adult three sons suspected for years that we were swingers; I suppose primarily by our interactions with others. They made snide remarks from time to time and we just ignored them.

At one point we just decided to tell all three at the same time (at a family get together) that we are consensual non monogamous. Two of the three boys were fine with it but one needed to time process it. It all worked out well and we have nothing to be ashamed about. Susan and I have the most loving relationship together and they know that.

Some of our friends also suspected and those we were comfortable with, so we told them as well. Although I’m sure some friends may have judged us, to the extent we know, most are understanding and it has not adversely affected our friendship.

More recently I have a beautiful girlfriend that I had been flirting back and forth with me for a couple years so on a phone conversation I told her that we were CNM and I would enjoy hooking up with her. She told me she would love to but not as long as I was married. She and I still communicate regularly and it has not adversely affected our friendship.

I also recently had a past lover that Susan and I had an amazing relationship with until she got married and the sex ended but we remain close friends. Out of the blue she told us both that she wants to hook up again! We both sense she lives in a sexless marriage.

On a positive note we have had a few friends admit that they envied how we are able to have this lifestyle.

Susan also recently connected with a guy that we know from sport association and we had drinks with him about a week ago. The conversation quickly got into relationships and he told us that we did not need to tell him we are a CNM couple ..he said he already sensed that!

As the years went by, we noticed so many friends that live together in sexless marriages, or cheated, or got cheated on but stayed together. When we look at our CNM relationships in comparison we believe that we are truly blessed to be wired this way.

Our love together is stronger than ever, our sex is off the charts amazing and life is good.

[BT2]

We know that two of our friends know. One is my wife's best girlfriend, and the other is a woman friend of mine. We know these two know because we have had FMF threesomes with both women. We have also vacationed with one of these women, and have had overnights with both of them. Other than that, we are pretty certain that family members, people we meet regularly in church, people we used to work with, etc. have no idea. In fact, some would she shocked. My wife has been a hotwife for over 30 years, and I used to be an fb.

[SammySigns]

Some of her friends know. She hooked up with one of them a few times and she went to the club with us. A couple others know because she had a threeway with a couple she met while on a girl's trip with them, and she had to explain that she wasn't just a cheater.

[Parsifal]

In the eight years since Galatea's embraced hotwifery, her metamorphosis both in style and demeanor have been so all-encompassing and radical that no one who knows her could help but wonder what's gotten into her little thicket besides me. From Brady bunch vanilla to blonde Sophia Vergara. Yet she still exudes just enough of her past wholesomeness to keep wonderment from gathering more convincingly into probable cause. Gala has one friend, however, Jen, whom Ive written of in past posts that Gala tells all. Her children know nothing. Nor her sister, who'd be alternatively jealous and judgmental (how easily those two J-words pass from one into the other!). Jen is the perfect confidante about it - desperately horny and appreciative but impeccably loyal to her well nourished family life and doting husband. Having this other woman in our lives who knows our deep intimate secrets has caused me to feel a disturbingly strong attraction for her, as my secret fantasy lately is to meet her for a glass of wine triannually (at most) and for us consummate our mutual arousal for my wife's exploits during the late afternoon in a nicely sunlit upstairs bedroom when our spouses are safely away.

[annsman]

My wife wanted a proper boyfriend, going on dates etc and at first they tried to be discreet, but she soon got fed up with having to hide out in out of the way places so started dating more locally. Although they’re not overly amorous in public I think people do realise that they are a couple so inevitably they were seen by a few friends and neighbours. If questioned we would just say he was a friend and leave it up to them what they thought about it.

We’ve told a few friends who we thought wouldn’t judge and some admitted they were also into sharing their wives or were swingers.
She also told her sister, for some reason, that she had boyfriends with my approval and her sister inadvertently (so she says) told their mum. We expected that to be awkward, but her mum was very laid back about it when she accepted that Ann wasn’t cheating. Her only concern was what would happen if Ann got pregnant, she told her mum she was on the pill, but it wouldn’t be a problem if she did.
Her mum said our sex life was our business and no one else’s and then made the comment that “we were all young once” which made us wonder if they were into wife swapping in their younger days.

We’re now both pretty much unconcerned what others think and to be honest I quite enjoy people knowing that I have a sexy wife and she’s an exhibitionist, so gets turned on by it anyway.

[Greywolf and Vixen]

It was pretty much impossible for us (her) to keep this totally secret from friends. But it's not common knowledge, just a close girlfriend or two that know what goes on with us.

[irishstag41]

She told her best friend. I think more have figured out. My best friend is fuckin her so he knows

[Cornudo1960]

Our girls known (now 30/36) since they were brought up with guys spending time at home and staying overnight since they were born, her mum and dad know mainly because her dad knows that she was fucking his mate when she was 17 and he was in mid 30's, my mum suspects but has never found the proof she needs to confront us.

[philandhollie]

Hollie has told her best friend but other than that we keep things as private as possible. I (Phil) would love to share with a friend or someone as talking about our lifestyle is something I want but unfortunatley dont have the opportunity. I have taken up writing a online blog about our life just as a outlet for me, it really does help tbh and I quiet enjoy doing it.

[havefun389]

Almost everyone knew. Open for about nine years. Stopped about 6 years ago due to a health issue. Our 3 daughters were snooping on moms phone for Christmas hints. They found many many pics of her with other guys and huge numbers of sexy texts. They asked if Mom's cheating. They asked if Mom's a prostitute (she liked to dress up). They were about 13 and 14. After we spoke with them they just thought we were weird. But after that it was so much easier. No more where's mom going excuses and we could just say Mom has a date with Tom tonight, or mom has a date tonight or she spending tonight at Tom's. She sawany other guys but we didn't really characterize it that way. They would also see her dressed up before leaving. Rather than having Tom run out before the kids got home from school, she introduced them to him and he would be at the house when they came home from school (usually in the kitchen baking something). Tom did stay the night a handful of times in our bedroom and slept on the couch. We were so concerned and it was such a a relief that it all turned out great. Even at times our daughters friends met Tom as well.

We were also wide open with all our friends and didn't lose any friends. I am sure it spread thru town. My wife and Tom would go out with our close friends to a show or even spent the night in my place at overnights at our very close friends mountain condo. Some family know and there was a short stint where my wife set her Facebook status to "open". Her cousin reached out to her in about 10 minutes and asked what the hell that meant so my wife explained it to her. She thought it was so cool. Her brother saw it too and asked so we explained it to him too.

Oh how I miss those days. But bottom line, being open was way more liberating than living with the fear of being found out and making excuses. It's scary though. As they say "feel the fear and do it anyway"

[Long Lurker 34]

Almost everyone knew. Open for about nine years. Stopped about 6 years ago due to a health issue. Our 3 daughters were snooping on moms phone for Christmas hints. They found many many pics of her with other guys and huge numbers of sexy texts. They asked if Mom's cheating. They asked if Mom's a prostitute (she liked to dress up). They were about 13 and 14. After we spoke with them they just thought we were weird. But after that it was so much easier. No more where's mom going excuses and we could just say Mom has a date with Tom tonight, or mom has a date tonight or she spending tonight at Tom's. She sawany other guys but we didn't really characterize it that way. They would also see her dressed up before leaving. Rather than having Tom run out before the kids got home from school, she introduced them to him and he would be at the house when they came home from school (usually in the kitchen baking something). Tom did stay the night a handful of times in our bedroom and slept on the couch. We were so concerned and it was such a a relief that it all turned out great. Even at times our daughters friends met Tom as well.

We were also wide open with all our friends and didn't lose any friends. I am sure it spread thru town. My wife and Tom would go out with our close friends to a show or even spent the night in my place at overnights at our very close friends mountain condo. Some family know and there was a short stint where my wife set her Facebook status to "open". Her cousin reached out to her in about 10 minutes and asked what the hell that meant so my wife explained it to her. She thought it was so cool. Her brother saw it too and asked so we explained it to him too.

Oh how I miss those days. But bottom line, being open was way more liberating than living with the fear of being found out and making excuses. It's scary though. As they say "feel the fear and do it anyway"

HF369
- Sorry to learn of your wife's health issues.
- The openness you had is like a breath of fresh air.
- Much like the SAS's motto of "Who Dares Wins".

[havefun389]

Long lurker, love the motto!

[havefun389]

As a professional exec I always wondered if somehow it might impact my career but it never did. A few good work friends knew me and my wife pretty well and our lifestyle but it never got around. It turned me on putting myself out to those few as a cuckold.