Just a Neighbor.

[slenderfish]

It's a bit of a conundrum. Some women prefer a man who "knows what he wants and takes it" but at the same time if you make a move and it's deemed too aggressive, it's a backfire. But if you take forever to make a move on such a woman, it's a backfire in that she loses interest.

Your best bet is to make compliments that have a bit of an edge, that lead in either direction. Also best in any case to vocalize your observations; all women (and men) are pleased when you pay attention. A new hair style, fresh nails, cute outfit, initially making observations and not any judgement or leading. This is what I always do in the office environment, in that the comments should play the same whether making them to a woman or a man.

Hey, new suit! Very professional.

Fresh hair cut/style.

New watch?

Then the response (now we are out of the office environment) informs your next comment.

Those nails are very sexy.

I love the fit of those jeans, your legs and all (unspoken, the ass, etc.).

I see by your arms and shoulders you've been working out. That's a good look!

Next response informs the next cycle.

The red nails fire me up!

I almost want to touch those legs.

Your exposed shoulders really compliment your pretty neck, such a feminine look, may I rub your shoulders and neck sometime?

And so it goes.

[36DDwife]

You buddy's wife who was with you might be someone to talk to. Women are pretty good at sizing up other women. She might have some insight.

Great idea! I don’t think I’d tell *everything* but just ask if she noticed any chemistry, sexual sparks, etc.

[harmankard]

Did she wear her wedding ring on Saturday?

Sean

[xero421]

Have you considered buying a pair of electronic comm helmets for your rides? Would let you chat on the road.

[NeighborGuy]

Hey thanks for the comments. This forum is great! Here are the other things I didn’t mention in my Sunday morning post…..

I noticed as we all talked she never mentioned being married or anything like that. I also noticed that she doesn’t wear a wedding ring which I thought was odd. (I see two members asked this question) I never really paid attention to it for the months we’ve been neighbors. I guess I’m always looking at other parts of her. And when we we’re all talking it was things like music, work, food, places, shopping and wine. And it’s cool that she’s into some of my early 2000’s rock bands I listen to.

Then what else I noticed. When I took her for the ride last week she was arms around me and leaning on my back. But this time she was into it and felt more relaxed. At lights I would stop and she would sit up and put her hands up on my shoulders or arm. On occasions moving her hands around like she was digging my arms and shoulder muscles. And right as the light turned green she put them back around my waist. Honestly she’s picked up on riding with me pretty good.

Also my friends are all around my age 28 to 32. They were surprised when she told them she was 39. They actually thought she was our age. I’ve dated a handful of girls my age since my divorce and she surely blows them away them with looks, style and feminine presence.

Ahhh, good idea Allinfun & 36DDwife. I’ll call my friend and have him ask his wife if she said or noticed anything while they chatted. They chatted while the boys played pool and then the girls teamed up and played my two buddies.

[Hawks6364]

So I’m a wannabe for sure, no experience in the lifestyle at all. But what I gather is being direct with an open line of communication is welcomed. What’s wrong with on the next ride with her, just be honest,”I love spending time with you, from our few moments together i can be certain there is something special about you. And sometimes I feel there is more here than an innocent neighbor Summer cruise. I respect both of you and don’t want to screw up the whole friendly neighbor thing. I am an open minded person and would love to hear your side of this friendship and what you are looking for”. I’m just spitballing here but you get the idea. Maybe it’s too aggressive, but I would sure appreciate being direct and upfront. Thoughts?

[ncalcur]

All good signs!

it will be interesting if she wears her ring most of the time but not when she rides with you, of course some of us on here love the idea oof that left hand wrapped around another guys cock -her wedding ring being displayed. Very sexy image!!

Hope the summer solstice gets you into their pool for a late night swim!!

[harmankard]

Considering most of the country is on “fire” right now… I’d use it as an excuse to join her for some pool time.

Her not mentioning she’s married is a huuuuuuuuuge sign btw.

Sean

[Pufferfish]

I think you handled everything well. I had a situation once where a woman I was very close with but totally platonic suddenly turned what was our usual and common quick closed lip kiss into her tongue trying to part my lips. Before I could gather myself and reciprocate she stopped and life went on. We never got back to that.

I can't tell what's going on here. You seem to be in the same spot. Several possibilities:

1. She's just a tease. She does this from time to time, maybe to assure herself that she's still hot.
2. She's in a distant relationship and she has reached the point where she's on the edge of deciding to get sex elsewhere. "He doesn't care what I do" means "he's not paying attention to me".
3. They've been talking about the lifestyle and she thinks maybe she's found someone to try it with. She/they haven't decided to proceed.
4. They are in the lifestyle, but she's not clear on your willingness.

You buddy's wife who was with you might be someone to talk to. Women are pretty good at sizing up other women. She might have some insight.

Allinfun nailed it for me. They aren't coming across as full on "swingers" exactly so I'm not sure exactly what the actual situation is. She might just be enjoying the attention and experience with nothing much ever actually coming of it. Or she might cheat. Or maybe she's a hotwife... could be a variety of different things. Ultimately, it doesn't sound like he's too concerned, and she's fully capable of making her own decisions. I just hope everyone ends up appreciating the fun situation for what it is and becomes.

All in all, I think you're doing great. Not pushing things too far, too fast, and being fairly careful. It's a very hot, and exciting situation, and ultimately I'm very happy for you and her. Just be mindful.

[gulfcpl]

If and when something does happen, it will be worth the wait. The build up is always a great thing. You’re doing things the right way.

[Englishcouple]

While chatting to them both in the yard they asked where I was from and if I was married. When I told them I was single they looked at each other and raised their eyebrows to each other which was strange. And then a month ago when I was heading out to meet friends they were leaving for dinner and we had a quick chat at our cars. They said they’d be having drinks when they got back so stop over. I stayed out with friends late and to be honest forgot about it when I got back.

We are not far off the end of June and from what you told us on 1st May this couple have been giving you signals since March or April, please correct me if I am wrong with the dates.

In my experience there's a fine line between playing the long game and seizing the moment when it comes to missing a hotwife opportunity. I think that she's waiting for you to make a move. We have been in a similar situation and my wife got pissed off when a guy she was very hot for didn't respond to her signals. She was all for dropping her pursuit of him but I persuaded her to continue and they ended up having great sex but when the three of us talked about it after many times of them being together, he told us that he hadn't picked up on her signals because she was married and he wasn't aware of the hotwife scenario.

The signals were there back in May when they looked at each other and raised eyebrows and also that she can't keep her hands off you when she's on your bike, it really is so obvious. I'll bet they can't understand why you are being so cautious and you may risk losing the momentum. She may well have her eye on other men who might get in there before you.

[Allinfun]

Your next move should be a one on one "date". You can come right out and ask her or you can do it passively by saying you're thinking of riding to _____ and getting some dinner on _________(some specific day). See if she bites. Alone time would allow the 2 of you to talk and you can maybe get a better handle on her thoughts. Interested to hear what your friend's wife says. Do you have her number? Face to face is best, but could be by text.

[slenderfish]

I agree with Englishcouple (above) about an inflection point here or coming up. When a woman puts herself in the position to receive a first kiss, it's quite vulnerable.

Some women are aggressive and let you know quickly their agenda. Others are more subtle and these are signals they are more passive and expect the man to actually make the move. The fact she hasn't been aggressive indicates to me that she is expecting you to make a move. All the other signals point to this. So you really do have to find out if she's just a happily married woman who loves to flirt, or if she wants something more substantial with you. Remember, a woman "knows" in advance if she is into a man, and acts accordingly while that feeling exists. Once the feeling is gone, it's tough to get it back.

Potential rejection is scary for you so you also have to know that it's more scary for her. She has so much more on the line.

If you read any of my strings, you will know that I'm really a guy who takes it ultra slow and plays the long game. So my observations and recommendations today are counter to my style, but I'm compelled to write this anyway.

As soon as is practicable, you should figure out which way it needs to go, because (as I noted above) the opportunity may slip away.

[Whosbeensleeping]

How about asking her how far her husband's lack of concern about what she does extends? That could be the perfect opening for another kiss and more.

[harmankard]

Neighbor Guy,

I noodled this for some reason and here’s my “final advice”. You’ve received a ton of opinions basically ranging from fuck her on the bike to just hold her hand but there is one thing all this collective wisdom agrees upon and one thing only…

this is your window. Carpe diem soon or she’ll get cold feet.

To paraphrase an old movie, “don’t be the guy in the pg13 movie we’re all hoping for. Be the guy in the R rated movie we’re not quite sure of…”

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GYu0bb-6Gm8

We’re all pulling for you,
Sean

Ps at this point I think even a ride with some rain might work to your favor. She’d find it sexy and melt when you pull over turn around and smooch her.

[hamadasamada88]

Hey thanks for the comments. This forum is great! Here are the other things I didn’t mention in my Sunday morning post…..

I noticed as we all talked she never mentioned being married or anything like that. I also noticed that she doesn’t wear a wedding ring which I thought was odd. (I see two members asked this question) I never really paid attention to it for the months we’ve been neighbors. I guess I’m always looking at other parts of her. And when we we’re all talking it was things like music, work, food, places, shopping and wine. And it’s cool that she’s into some of my early 2000’s rock bands I listen to.

Then what else I noticed. When I took her for the ride last week she was arms around me and leaning on my back. But this time she was into it and felt more relaxed. At lights I would stop and she would sit up and put her hands up on my shoulders or arm. On occasions moving her hands around like she was digging my arms and shoulder muscles. And right as the light turned green she put them back around my waist. Honestly she’s picked up on riding with me pretty good.

Also my friends are all around my age 28 to 32. They were surprised when she told them she was 39. They actually thought she was our age. I’ve dated a handful of girls my age since my divorce and she surely blows them away them with looks, style and feminine presence.

Ahhh, good idea Allinfun & 36DDwife. I’ll call my friend and have him ask his wife if she said or noticed anything while they chatted. They chatted while the boys played pool and then the girls teamed up and played my two buddies.

Really love this thread! If system of a down is one of those bands then you both DEFINITELY have my blessings

[NeighborGuy]

And it’s cool that she’s into some of my early 2000’s rock bands I listen to.

Really love this thread! If system of a down is one of those bands then you both DEFINITELY have my blessings

Hell yeah Chop Suey!

[hamadasamada88]

YES haha!! May good luck be in your favor my friend

[NeighborGuy]

One thing I noticed is I’m always referring to her as “she”, “my neighbor” or “her” in my posts and it’s bugging me. Don’t know if I should just use her name since I think it’s beautiful or just an initial to describe her. I guess I’ll have to think on that.

But I talked to my friends wife last night after she got home from work and it was nice to get her perspective. I asked what she thought of her when we were all hanging out Saturday night and she said she’s a cutie, fun and definitely into me. When I was playing pool or whatever she was always looking at me. We looked cute together and it would be cool if we hung out again. In my head I’m like, oh shit if she only knew the situation! lol


On another note I saw him again Monday morning and this morning and he just waves as I’m going for my run. He’s just doesn’t seem to care, I mean I just took her out Saturday night for 5 hours and he know about the flirting and he’s so nonchalant.

Well that was about it.
Trying to make it through this work week.

[NeighborGuy]

Oh and I just read some of the other posts and I agree. I’m going to need to find some time with her or ask her out alone and have a talk about their situation.

[gulfcpl]

Get your road glide out more often on the weeknights if possible. Her hearing it may prompt more rides. Just a thought. Something about the sound of a Harley that turns them on. Hell, it even turns me on. Ha.

[Pufferfish]

Oh and I just read some of the other posts and I agree. I’m going to need to find some time with her or ask her out alone and have a talk about their situation.

Maybe just be careful HOW you bring it up without coming right out with it? Throwing ideas around here. You want to make it clear that you understand the sexual tension phase you're in, and really like it, but don't want to assume that "you're going to hit that" you know?

Maybe when bringing up how amazing she looks, saying something like how awesome her husband is for being ok with her doing whatever she wants. Being in a hotwife relationship, both me and my wife like the guy praising our relationship with each other. Then throw in a "I'm just concerned that he wouldn't forgive something that another guy does..." That would let her know that you've definitely picked up on where things are going, but have concerns. I would think she'd want to make the situation clearer, if there was a green light to go? And if she just brushes it off or dismisses it, she's either just playing around or cheating? Food for thought?

[rascalnvixen]

Maybe you can put a knobby tire on the rear wheel to add to her excitement as she rides with you in her arms!!!!! Hahaha, just kidding of course but it sure seems the bike rides are going to be the key to making this more than what it was originally. Yes, take her for a destination ride, that her hubby knows about some distance away and make a day of it. That would give you plenty of time to talk and be very casual about it, not a hurried comment or two that lets you understand her/them more completely.

Rascal

[Allinfun]

A bit further on my advice to do something one on one, figure out a casual place to eat at the outer limit of a nice ride. Something with outside seating. Sometimes even a food truck rally that you bike to can be a lot of fun. It seems like she's into the fact that you ride and she likes the biker lifestyle. She might have had a past boyfriend who rode. If things go well, surprise her on the way home by going to a place that has music and dancing. Ask her after dinner if she has to get home or if she has time to stop somewhere, but don't indicate that you have this in mind. I bet she loves to dance. Dancing is an intimate thing. She'll probably love the surprise. If she's game, you'll have opportunities for a real kiss.

[ncalcur]

One thing I noticed is I’m always referring to her as “she”, “my neighbor” or “her” in my posts and it’s bugging me. Don’t know if I should just use her name since I think it’s beautiful or just an initial to describe her. I guess I’ll have to think on that.

But I talked to my friends wife last night after she got home from work and it was nice to get her perspective. I asked what she thought of her when we were all hanging out Saturday night and she said she’s a cutie, fun and definitely into me. When I was playing pool or whatever she was always looking at me. We looked cute together and it would be cool if we hung out again. In my head I’m like, oh shit if she only knew the situation! lol

On another note I saw him again Monday morning and this morning and he just waves as I’m going for my run. He’s just doesn’t seem to care, I mean I just took her out Saturday night for 5 hours and he know about the flirting and he’s so nonchalant.




Well that was about it.
Trying to make it through this work week.

Great feed back from your married friend! "She is into you" very cool. Yeah be great to have an initial or something to describe her! Also so breasts are 34c? or 32b? also, be really cool to see if she wears her ring most or all other occasions. Again the idea of her ring hand wrapped around another cock is a sure fire turn on!

Good luck with work and thanks for the updates, they keep us going!!