Hotwife going out alone/why is it too difficult for me?

[BallSpanking]

Mr Reese,

I had a question...

Are you getting less of Ms Reese now that she has more than one BF??

[flyinfast]

I haven't read the whole thread... some in the begining and started back up at page 100 on...

There's a few recurring themes I'd like to comment on, but first I'll just say something about what Mr. R said back around Nov 19.

I look at our sex...her hotwife play as a drug...we keep pushing to reach that first "high" or that sexual nirvana as I like to say....we are hotwife junkies...we explore for more...we push each other...more and more.

Man, you have absolutely no idea how true that statement is.

Sex is just like a drug, like heroin. In terms of your brain chemistry it has very similar effects. And like any "high" you can be addicted. The addictive mechanism is built into all of us.

One problem that's come up in your hotwife play is Mrs. R started to fall in love with some of her playmates and now is in love with two men, Micheal and Mr. R (and soon Marques too if she keep up with him despite what she says). That two is all natural and a consequence of having sex. It is a mechanism built into human beings.

All that brain chemistry falls in line to make us fall in love. Unavoidable really.

Mrs. R. has said many times she is her husband's slave.

That begs the question, Who is the real Master?

As to "balls of steel" and being an alpha male, no offense Mr. R. but an alpha male fucks the prom queen and her sister while their boyfriends are getting glasses of punch. He doesn't suck the other guy's cum out of his girlfriend.

Have fun. But maybe there's a train wreck cuming?

[bubbajack]

Hello Mr and Mrs R,

I love reading your accounts of what's actually going on in your lives.

It's clear to me from your whole story that you two are in a very dynamic, constantly changing process which has taken you to many unexpected places and through many surprising developments. I think you are enjoying the intensity of the ride very much and I think you will know when it gets to wherever it will be that you want to get off.

Anyone can cobble together a theory out of half-understood bits and pieces from here and there that seems to that person to provide satisfactory explanations of other people's experiences.The problem with a theory is that it's like a man with a hammer or a surgeon: the hammer guy pounds on and the surgeon cuts open whatever they encounter, just because those are the means they are equipped with. But not everything is a protruding nail or a case of acute appendicitis.

I hope you will keep telling us what's going on - it's evidently been a ton of thrills for you and it has provided lots of that for me, too. It has the unmistakable stamp of reality on it and accordingly doesn't fit neatly within any pre-determined boxes. That's why it's so exciting!

Thanks to both of you for sharing your splendid, sexy adventures.

[mrs_reese]

Bubbajack, thank you so much.

flyinfast, i use alphamale bc that is what hubby always goes back too.
i am the one who torments and makes deals with the devil by asking him to do some really wild and crazy stuff.
Like sucking the cum of my lover outta me.
He is thrill ride, and never settles for the normal.
So blame me for making him go off the deep end.
That is one subject that I will not bend on.
Really? Do you really think that marques or Michael is my master?
Words are written and a lot of our lives are obmitted in this thread.
For one day, if you observed our lives, whether in hotwife play, or real life, you would know that I am my husbands slave.
Anyway, thanks for your thoughts and opinions.
It's nice to read from new posters.

We have been taking a break lately with the holidays approaching.
It's been a nice change of pace.

more soon.

[Aynsley]

Mrs. R.

First, glad to see you 'back'.

Second, at NO POINT would any sane reader of your thread think:
a. that you are not Totally Committed to Mr. R, nor
b. that Mr. R. is not Totally Committed to you

Have a great Holidays w/the Family.

[mrs_reese]

Thanks Anysley, I can always count on my Windy City friend.
xoxo

[BallSpanking]

Good to hear from you Reeses.

Happy holidays!

[mrs_reese]

BS, how could i ever forget about you.
Sorry, I have been taking it slow lately.
I miss talking to you, but even though we dont talk as often as we would like to, you always have a place in my heart

[doitforher]

Good to hear from you again. You two are a couple of our heroes in this crazy HW lifestyle.

You guys, and others, that have led the way by sharing your journey have helped Di and me with the rush of emotions that come with HW play. Without such fine examples to refer to I would probably be freaking out about how fast the dynamics can change in this HW lifestyle. Thank You again.
DIFH

[54321]

One thing seems very clear to me as we find ourselves on Page 133 of what must be the longest, the most detailed and the most convoluted hotwifing/swinging thread on the internet. Mr and Mrs Reese know EXACTLY what they are doing. I've known them so long now that I care about them, but I stopped worrying LONG ago! lol!

Best wishes,

54321

[Iris777]

I used to worry too, that you were getting to far afield, but as my beloved Aynsley wrote, it is impossible to not realize after all of this that you and your husband always come back to each other and that he is always you rock and priority. The rest is just play.

It really is SO much fun to be a hotwife!

[groovy9]

I hear a lot of love expressed when they speak of each other.

Even with her ridiculous libido and drive to torture Mr R, it's always perfectly clear where her heart is. Mr R, though, almost sounds conflicted from time to time. I don't think he is, though. I think it's just the edgy nature of their games poking through.

I'm on edge pretty much all the time, and we haven't come close to pushing the envelope the way these two do. I don't know how you do it, Reeses.

[mrs_reese]

JRG, Aynsley, DIFH, 54321, you are constant supporters, I thank-you so much for your love. You all are wonderful!

Groovy, thanks for your post. We do push the boundaries. Funny thing is that I never ever acted the way I am today.
I wrote a pm to one of the posters and talked about the same thing.
A few years ago, I was the typical wife. Dedicated to my marriage, a one man woman who never considered being with another man while married to my husband. It took a lot of time and patience for my husband to convince me to move forward as a hotwife. The tables have turned slightly though.
It used to by hubby pushing me to new adventures, but now it is I that pushes him and plays his fantasy games out.
I have changed as a woman. I am so much more independent with my sexuality. As long as my husband continues to be the sexual animal that he is; as long as I have his support and trust, I will continue to play his games.
At the end of the day, I am his slave and my focus is turning him on intimately and erotically.
I know that I have his absolute love and respect. It is the other stuff; our sexuality that I will continue to work at with him!

Hubby is conflicted at times. His career path is very busy right now, so his absense on line is not intentional.
We always find our way back. I must admit that his torment is caused by his permission to seek my own encounters. Whether he is with me or now, I am free to be with anyone that I choose. But it is that permission and the manner that I act out with a lover that makes hubby a hotwife junkie!

Until next time!
xoxo

[BallSpanking]

Hi sweetie,

Always love to hear from you.
Is there any chance you would consider regaling your loyal forum followers with some new sexy pics of you?
Just in case your answer is yes, here would be my requests:
1- You and Marques in action
2- You orgasming with Michael
3- Any other new pics you'd care to share with us...

Kisses, Baby

[Aynsley]

Hey Mrs. R.,
if there are requests to be made, here's mine...

...put on an outrageously HOT workout outfit,
(i.e. - thong w/o tights...maybe no bra )
go to the gym when Marques is there, and have him click some pics.

I'm talking the kind of outfit that any other women in the gym would glare at you for wearing,
but the guys are dropping weights on feet, staring at you.
You'd have the side benefit of driving Marques nuts.

Then you can go to Marques' car, and take some pics that BS is looking for

[groovy9]

I like this game. Here's mine: Just a simple shot of her bare ass, and holding a handwritten sign above it that says "Hi, Groovy"

Then I can show it to Roxy and make her jealous and she'll want to reclaim me.

[flyinfast]

Mr. and Mrs. Reese

First don't get me wrong.  I too enjoy your story and the many others on the site and do hope you continue telling yours. What you've written is very erotic.

But my comments are because of how things the both of you have written strike me and I am being honest with you about my reactions and impressions with no malice in my heart. I'm just letting you know how I see your situation.

You two are close to the flame while I sit at a much farther distance. Might you both be blinded by the brilliance of that flame, while I can see some things you can not? Just something for you and Mr. R to consider. If I'm wrong or totally clueless what harm is done? You can easily dismiss my "cobbled together theory".

The whole alpha male thing had been on my mind but wasn't the main point. I considered not including it but decided to at the end. And your comment, "that is what hubby always goes back to" along with other comments about reverting to a "normal" husband and wife like in Toronto - no hotwife play or taking a break being a nice change of pace - lead me to these thoughts.

Are you playing roles, sort of the way professional actors get into character - playing someone they really aren't, a fantasy but acted out in real life but then reverting back to ordinal wife, ordinary husband? I.e Mr R reverting back to being an alpha male - his true self while the cuck is just a role? At times from your writing that seems to be what's happening in your life. Periods where you need a time out from the hotwife / cuckold play to just be ordinary husband and wife.  But then you say you really need to see Michael. You crave him like an addict craves their next fix. He's your drug. (I like that song.) And what is Mr. R's true self? Alpha male or cuck? Which one is the role for he can't be both in reality can he? Perhaps we have different ideas of what an Alpha male is. Is your true self an "ordinary" wife or is the real you the hotwife or is the hotwife just a role playing fantasy of you?

So where is the reality? When is it role playing and when not? Has the fantasy become your reality? Do you say you love Michael because you love him in reality or is that part of the play, part of your character - Mrs R the Hotwife?

The train wreck, as I see it, happens, because of the addiction to the drug and the closeness to the flame that drug induces, when you can no longer tell what is real and what is a role in a fantasy acted out on the stage of real life. In several posts you have said you were confused.  I think I see why.  Can you? Or does the flame blind you? Are you truly confused in real life or is that just part of the play too? Where does fantasy end and reality begin? Or do they become so blended it is hard to tell? Are you thinking of Michael or Marques on your break? Right now? Or are they shut out of your mind completely? Or are you craving that next fix?

In the many pages of your posts Mr. R's comment about "pushing to reach that first 'high'" and "we are hotwife junkies" struck me the most.

Is being a junkie of any kind a positive thing? Just like a heroin addict do you build tolerance and need ever more and more of the drug - more kink - to get that next high? What's next after a BBC gangbang (as some have suggested would be the logical and hot next step)? How do you step it up from there? Does Mr. R get a cock cage for Christmas? Or pink panties? What will the devilish Mrs. R think of next to torment Mr. R to everyone's delight?

You've said you fell in love with some of the men you've slept with. How could it be otherwise? What makes a person fall in love? The chemistry in your brain that is triggered when a man and woman have sex.  All that we think and feel is the result of what happens in our brains. And a lot of that we have no real control over. A lot of it is simply on autopilot. The more sex you have with any man the more feelings you will develop for him.

As to the "really wild and crazy stuff" there is no one to "blame". That isn't the game here. If you all enjoy it great. Whatever floats your boat. The danger I see for you both is becoming really addicted to the games - both the sex and the mind fuck.  And I mean really addicted. Just how I see it from what you've written and how things have ratcheted up. You say Reese is a thrill ride. Do you, both of you, need an ever bigger and bigger thrill to be sated? Just like a real junkie needs more and more smack until they overdose? Yes absolutely you've been on a thrill ride.  What happens when you can't get higher? When the music stops?

Do I think Marques or Michael is your Master? No. Not even close to what I was thinking.

You are your husband's slave. Who is his Master?

N.B. I don't know how anyone could read my previous post and conclude I questioned the Reeses commitment to one another.  That is not in doubt, nor is it impossible for a person to love more than one person. Polyamory happens. It is possible for Mrs R to love both Michael and Mr. R, and really love them both. It's not easy to juggle those balls but I'm sure she can handle it.

What concerns me is the additive nature of the play. It truly is a drug, an addiction and if you aren't careful... like all addictions can become destructive. And as with most addictions the addicts seldom realize or will admit how addicted they've become. They are far too close to the flame.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas. I do wonder what Mr. R will be getting under his tree.... oh, that devilish Mrs. R... what does she have planned?

[gordo]

^^^^ Totally agree,,,,,,

[dave1966]

Fly"n I"ve been in the shadows here for a long time and have read and enjoyed this post from the begining and from day one Mrs.R has always said, should she be asked to stop all this she would without hesitation. I doubt there is an addiction there . I believe her devotion to her husband would far exceed any desires to continue this lifestyle if they decided to stop playing.

[BallSpanking]

I don't care about defining roles or roleplaying schedules...
As long as it is working for both of you, that is all that matters...!

[mrs_reese]

Hi everyone! Hubby and I have read some of the past posts and I would like to comment first.
Only because I am very horny and I want sex from hubby NOW! But I will have to wait; soon I will have to put a child to bed and then

Flyinfast, I respest the honest thoughts and questions that you asked. You have some very valid statements and questions to discuss.

To all my loyal friends, thank-you for being on my side.
Dave1966/ your first post? And I am the one to receive it? How can I really say thanks?
JR, Ballspanking, Iris, Gordo(nice to hear from you again) MrBear , you know I love you guys and Iris

And to all you guys who want a pic, Groovy, Aynsley and BS, you all know that I am kindof shy about all of that.
Every so often, I will put out a few pics and usually go into my bedroom and masterbate to everyone who says that they "jack off" to me. Btw, I love that word!!

In my next post, I will comment now that I finished with all the pleasantries.

[groovy9]

... they "jack off" to me. Btw, I love that word!!

I would totally jack off to a shot of your ass with my name above it. I would. I'd jack off. And I'd photoshop it to say "Hi, Ballspanking" and then he'd jack off. Pretty soon, all of OWH would be jacking off to photos of your ass with everyone's names above it.

Just sayin'...

[mrs_reese]

Flyinfast, we may use some of our words loosely. Do I really want to be a sex junkie? Are we? Is hubby a loose cannon?
Is he on a sex thrill ride, never able to reach his so called Sexual Nirvana? Who is hubby's master? Am I his true slave?
I hope I can contribute to your post with some of these questions asked; which I believe touches on some of your comments,opinions and questions.
We are extremely aware of the consequences of our sex games and hotwife play.
Have you ever noticed our absense at times? Where do we go? Why do we walk away from our thread for a period of time?
We do this to reclaim each other! I become very tired of this at times. I want normal! We have gotten away from normal and I am usually the "one" to bring us back to a vanilla marriage, the marriage that used to be ours before we started hotwife play a few years ago. Hubby will always come back too. This lifestyle scares him more than it does me. Why?
Because he has lost his control over all of this. I have earned his permission to be completely free and to choose whomever I want to be my sexual partner and quite possibly my love interest.
I am amazing! To all who have told me that; thank-you! I am able to STOP all of this when I say SO!
And I say NO more than you realize! Right now, we are in a time-out mode. I am worn out! Marques, Michael and a mystery person understands how I feel. They have no choice! I am the ONE who controls all of this!
Being in this situation, it also terrifies the hell out of me! What happens if I can not say NO more with a particular lover one day? What happens??? What happens my marriage? I constantly think about those questions and it allows me to come back to reality very fast!

Part 3 is going to be turned over to hubby.
Bed time for a certain love of mine!
I will let hubby finish answering some of my questions.
He will be on shortly.
xoxoxo

love u all!

[reese]

My turn...........my sexy wife is taking care of her daughter...bed time!
And I can not wait..for the record.....to be in bed with my wife very soon. Sex is on the agenda..and I am one lucky guy!

Can you all give me a moment?
I want to chip in on some of these posts and answer some of my wives comments.

[luxxluthor]

134 pages of honest, insightful, intelligent, stimulating, and respectful posts. Amazing, fucking amazing. This has got to be the all time best thread.

Thanks,
Luxx