“Kinky or vanilla?” is not a question that needs to be asked when it is my husband’s birthday weekend.

Hotels bring out the kinky in him, and I’ve learned to expect a lot of naughty fun when he’s in charge.
This past weekend was exactly that….with a lot of romance, intimacy, and couple time thrown in!
My handsome husband turned 48. Our custom has been to try to go away for at least one night every time it is his birthday, my birthday, or our anniversary. It is great to leave the kids and other responsibilities behind, even just for a short time, and reconnect as the man and woman who fell madly in love decades ago!
Last year, we had to cancel his birthday weekend because of COVID lockdowns. This year, the province of Ontario announced restrictions during his birthday week yet again! But we were determined to go anyway. It turned out great.
We stayed at an inn about an hour’s drive from Toronto. It was originally built as the “country manor” for a wealthy family in the 1800s, and sits on 75 acres of forest and gardens. We booked a suite in the refurbished stables with a bedroom, two bathrooms, and a large sitting area with a wood-buring fireplace.
We arrived a bit early, but our room was ready so we dropped off our bags and decided to enjoy the wintery sunshine before it got dark. We set out to explore the grounds and walked by a young couple getting their wedding photos taken. They looked so happy despite the bride wearing a short sleeve gown, standing in the woods on a freezing January afternoon. We were much less glamorous in our winter coats, sensible boots, gloves, and toques! LOL.
We were the only ones in tropical greenhouses on the property, so we snuck a quick kiss. We also had a wonderful hike in the woods – talking about the kids and work, but also about the growing media empire of the New York Times, the challenges facing the Toronto Raptors, and anything else that came to mind.
We got back to our room an hour or so later. D put on some tea while I went to our car to pick up the wine we had forgotten to bring inside. Romance was in the air all around. A couple were sitting under a blanket at one of the outdoor campfire pits, and the bride and groom were now taking photos by their cake in the “winter tent” (a permanent structure with a wood roof and wood burning fireplace, but three open sides with canvas curtains that can be closed for privacy). Wedding guests were also starting to arrive (a maximum of 20 for outdoor events in Ontario right now) and were all decked out and gorgeous too. I congratulated the couple and told everyone that I hope they had a great evening.
When I got back to our room, the tea was ready and hotel staff had set up a cute little table in our sitting area. This inn has one of the best restaurants in Canada, but COVID restrictions meant that the restaurant was closed. Instead, the inn was offering in-room dining. We placed our order and they said they’d deliver drinks, appetizers and main courses in about an hour. Dessert would follow 30 minutes after that.
What should we do with the next hour? D had some ideas.
He sat down in one of the two armchairs facing our fireplace and told me to strip. I did as the birthday boy instructed. I got naked and first gave him a nice long view of my ass as I leaned on the fireplace mantel. Then I turned and did a sexy dance to the music playing in the background. I walked forward, and leaned down to kiss D, my hands on the armrests of his chair. He spent a long time ogling my chest, before making eye contact. I kissed him and said, “Happy birthday!”
My parents tend to give D cash for his birthday. Being the naughty man that he is, D likes to spend their money on sex toys and really slutty lingerie for me. I suspect they have underwritten half of our sex toy collection! LOL. This year was no different and D asked me if I wanted to see what he had chosen.
We went to the bedroom and D opened the sex bag he had packed for our time together. The new toys were all from a small business in Toronto. The owner uses a 3-D printer to make what he calls “terrible toys.” The shipment even came with a handwritten note to D saying that the owner “hoped these are even more painful than you anticipated.” LOL.
There were two “meat hammer” nipple clamps that could be adjusted to different levels of intensity. There were two toys that looked like mini bear traps. These were also intended for my breasts. And there was a larger bear-trap contraception that was intended for my labia! D was chuckling a little at my face as he unpacked them.
It was his birthday, though, and birthday boys should get what they want. I took a deep breath and told him that he was lucky that I love him. He laughed and said that was true.
I lay back on the bed and spread my legs. D used his expert tongue to play with my clit and bring me to orgasm before any terrible toys were put to use. Then he winked at me and picked up the first toy.
It was oval shaped, made of blue plastic, and consisted of two layers held together by a post and screw at each end. Each layer had one smooth side (facing out) and one side of “teeth”. As the screws are tightened, the teeth move closer and closer together.
The intent of the toy is two-fold – to spread my labia wide, and also clamp them in the teeth. It was a very different kind of sensation. It was more pinchy than painful, although there was also an element of pain to it. I was a bit of a wuss and wouldn’t let D clamp it too tightly.
To distract me from my labia sensations, D grabbed the “meat hammer” clamps and put them on my nipples. I have some experience with nipple clamps, but these spread out the clamping over a wider area than our regular clover clamps. And the “meat tenderizer” texture on the clamps provided an additional new sensation.
D alternated between tightening the clamps on my nipples and then tightening them on my labia. With my pussy lips spread so wide, my clit did begin to poke out. When I wasn’t paying attention to the pain, I enjoyed the sensation of cool air, D’s hot breath, and the occasional tongue flick on my exposed clit.
“Your pussy looks beautiful spread like this,” D told me.
I rolled my eyes a bit but also thanked him. He took out his phone to take a photo and noticed that Sir had sent him a text to wish him a happy birthday and his hopes that we’d have a great time away.
D couldn’t resist showing him my current state. He shared a close-up view of my spread pussy, a full body shot with all three toys, and then a photo of the impressions on my nipples when the clamps were removed.
Sir thanked him for the photos and said that it looked like the weekend was off to a fine start. He wished us well again.
D put his phone away. He removed the labia clamps, then pulled me to the edge of bed and slid his hard cock inside my dripping pussy. I was so aroused that it didn’t take long to make me cum hard. He leaned down to kiss me and said that we should probably get dressed. Dinner would be here soon.
D hadn’t orgasmed yet, but he reminded me that the night was young. He also handed me my remote vibrator and told me to make sure that it was inside my pussy and turned on before dinner arrived.
I did as instructed and was dressed with the vibrator set to low when the staff knocked on our door. I put on my face mask and let them in. They put our drinks and appetizers on the table. Lit the center candle and left the main course under a cloche on the coffee table. They said they’d return to clear the table and bring dessert in about 30 minutes.
D lit a fire in our fireplace and we enjoyed the romantic dinner.
“In room dining is kind of nice,” D said to me after feeding me a sample bite of his food. “Not only do you not have to make small talk with the waiter, but you can also ask your dining partner to show you her breasts and she’ll be free to do so.”
I laughed but lifted my sweater to show him. “They’ve mostly recovered from the clamps,” I told him.
“For now,” he replied with another grin.
We cleared our appetizer plates and set up the main course. “Before we eat, I think you should turn that vibrator on high and let me watch you orgasm,” he suggested.
I rolled my eyes at him again, but also smiled. I grabbed my phone, adjusted the settings and slid a hand down my leggings so that I could hold the external part of the vibrator right against my clit. It didn’t take long to make myself cum.
“See? You can’t do that in a fancy restaurant either,” He said.
“Well you probably CAN do that in a fancy restaurant, it would just be frowned upon,” I responded.
We finished our meal. The staff returned to clear our dishes and deliver dessert. We put the “do not disturb” sign on our door and decided to settle in for the rest of the night. I won’t share all the details, but will say that the birthday boy did get everything he wanted that night
