New here-wish she would

[Fox]

Found this site from a link on another general sex forum. Been married to my amazing wife for 23 years. Early on I never would’ve imagined wanting to see her with another man. Another woman, yes, but not another man. In fact when we were dating a coworker of hers sexually harassed her for a while and the only reason he still has all his teeth is she was scared she’d lose her job if I did something.

Anyway, at some point maybe around 10 years ago, she told me she’d had a dream that she had sex with her ex boyfriend and his best friend out of nowhere. She didn’t understand why she had that dream and it upset her. For some reason I wanted to know the details of the dream and it turned me on. We had sex and I had her tell me about it again and I came hard. I’ve been having her tell me whatever various fantasies she can come up with ever since. But she frequently makes it a point to let me know she doesn’t ever think about that and would never actually do it. I’ve always just said that I knew that she wouldn’t do it but the idea turns me on. Recently after sex I told her that I know she says she’d never do it but if she ever changed her mind I would be all for it. Sometime after that, maybe a couple weeks, she had a few glasses of wine in her and she said something along the lines that If I got 3 or 4 glasses in her under the right circumstances who knows who I may be able to get her in bed with. Of course when she was sober she said that was just the wine talking.

I sure do wish I could get her to open up to it, but as I’ve read on here in several threads over the last few days it may just have to stay fantasy for me. Sure does get me going when I read some of the your stories about it actually happening. I can imagine her fucking someone else and I get hard instantly.

[tunafish]

I was sharing my fantasy with my wife of her fucking others for almost 40 years. Last month out of the L said to me we’re not getting any younger. I want to give you your gift. I said gift? Gift? What gift. The gift that you’ve asked of me for 40 years. I said you’re joking. No. And then she laid it out in detail.

If you’d like to know more about it check my thread on the HW forum. It’s titled 40 year fantasy coming true?

Don’t give up. We’re now 8 weeks into an incredible journey. One that I’d not miss for anything.

A word to the wise. Be sure you’re listening to her. This isn’t about what you want. It’s about her.

[Fox]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

[armyguyot1]

Welcome to the forum Fox.

[36DDwife]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

Mine says the same. Most potential fuckbuddies for my wife are just human dildos. She does have a couple that really push her buttons. One of them she hasn’t fucked yet but if she gets the chance I know she will.

[Bandhubby]

Don't give up hope, and look for baby steps that she might be ready to take. See if she will tell you about men she sees or meets who she finds attractive. Encourage her to dress sexy when she goes out, and to flirt. A lot of wives are in the habit of rejecting attention that they perceive as sexual from other men, encourage her to not only accept it, but enjoy it.
Try to tie the fantasy to little things in everyday life, so that she starts thinking about it outside the bedroom.
All you can do is plant seeds, really, and hope that they sprout within her libido.

[Fox]

Bandhubby-pretty much doing the things you describe. When we’re having sex I sometimes ask her to tell me a guy she/we know that she’s attracted to in some way and tell me what she’d do with him given the chance. Just the other day we talked about going out for a nice dinner this coming weekend as we don’t often get the chance with teenage boys that both play different sports. I told her I wanted her to wear something sexy so I could show off my hot wife(she has no clue what a hot wife is). As you say, she never thinks guys look at her and would surely brush them off if she picked up on it. I’ll keep planting those seeds and hopefully some day something comes from it

[Bandhubby]

So she doesn't oppose the idea at all, just doesn't show any initiative to actually start anything, it sounds like.
My wife and I started out by trying a threesome, and most of the motivation and legwork in finding the first guy was on my part. Her mindset was similar to your wife's, the fantasies aroused her but she didn't really show any initiative to take things any further than that. But she played along with the idea of me finding and intitially vetting candidates, and got involved in the conversation once I found a prospect. And we had our first threesome not long after.
So if your wife shows any interest in a MMF, you might float that idea and see where it takes you.

[Fox]

I posted earlier that when she tells me fantasies during sex of fucking other guys, she often makes it a point just after to remind me that she doesn’t really think that way and would never do it. It was just recently that she said, while drunk, that if she got drunk under the right circumstances that who knows who I could get her into bed with. But when she sobered up she basically acted like that was just the wine talking. Basically she just comes up with those fantasies cuz she knows I like it and it helps get me off. She does have the typical hang ups of what is acceptable for a woman to do so possibly something like that has crossed her mind and she only admitted it when she was drunk. Not sure what to think about that.

[Fox]

So after reading several threads here over the past couple weeks since finding this site, I got the courage to subtly bring the idea up to her a little more. I mentioned last weekend, after sex where she had just indulged me with a fantasy of her fucking another guy, that if she ever changed her mind I’d be all for it. She brushed it off as not realistic. After a stressful week this we decided to get away to a hotel in the mountains last night. No kids, no work issues to deal with. Just go out to dinner and enjoy ourselves. This is when we usually have some of our best sex. Had sex before dinner, then again after dinner. Then we got into a conversation about how to keep things fresh and exciting sexually. After 25 years together that can be difficult. So we talked about a few ideas. Then at one point I asked if there were any fantasies she has never told me that she actually would like to try. She said all her fantasies were of me taking her away like we were last night and romancing her. Nothing out of the ordinary. I then said something like “you never think about any guy or girl you know or see somewhere?” She said “we’ll sure occasionally but nothing I’d ever really want to do”. So I the. Told her again that if she ever changed her mind I’d be super turned on to watch her with someone else. She said “really, you’d really want to see me have sex with another man?” I’d said “oooohhh yeah, huge turn on for me” she said something about me getting jealous and not really liking it in real life. I told her that I’m 100% confident in our relationship, I know she’s not going anywhere, I know how much we love each, I know she doesn’t understand it but I’d love to see her enjoying sex with someone else and it would be possibly the biggest turn on for me ever. She then said she’d be too worried about diseases, which I knew she would. I told there were ways around that, meaning we’d have to make sure the person was tested. Then she said she could never do a one night stand type of scenario where she just met some guy and fucked him, she’d have to have some connection with him. I told her that could be arranged.

So, she not only didn’t slam the door shut, she actually left it fairly open if I’m reading her right. I know I need to take this slow but what do I do now. How do I move this forward without pushing too hard and messing it up?

[Fox]

So after reading several threads here over the past couple weeks since finding this site, I got the courage to subtly bring the idea up to her a little more. I mentioned last weekend, after sex where she had just indulged me with a fantasy of her fucking another guy, that if she ever changed her mind I’d be all for it. She brushed it off as not realistic. After a stressful week this we decided to get away to a hotel in the mountains last night. No kids, no work issues to deal with. Just go out to dinner and enjoy ourselves. This is when we usually have some of our best sex. Had sex before dinner, then again after dinner. Then we got into a conversation about how to keep things fresh and exciting sexually. After 25 years together that can be difficult. So we talked about a few ideas. Then at one point I asked if there were any fantasies she has never told me that she actually would like to try. She said all her fantasies were of me taking her away like we were last night and romancing her. Nothing out of the ordinary. I then said something like “you never think about any guy or girl you know or see somewhere?” She said “we’ll sure occasionally but nothing I’d ever really want to do”. So I the. Told her again that if she ever changed her mind I’d be super turned on to watch her with someone else. She said “really, you’d really want to see me have sex with another man?” I’d said “oooohhh yeah, huge turn on for me” she said something about me getting jealous and not really liking it in real life. I told her that I’m 100% confident in our relationship, I know she’s not going anywhere, I know how much we love each, I know she doesn’t understand it but I’d love to see her enjoying sex with someone else and it would be possibly the biggest turn on for me ever. She then said she’d be too worried about diseases, which I knew she would. I told there were ways around that, meaning we’d have to make sure the person was tested. Then she said she could never do a one night stand type of scenario where she just met some guy and fucked him, she’d have to have some connection with him. I told her that could be arranged.

So, she not only didn’t slam the door shut, she actually left it fairly open if I’m reading her right. I know I need to take this slow but what do I do now. How do I move this forward without pushing too hard and messing it up?

[hornedhubby]

Actually, I think this is a classic instance where the ideal course is to pamper her even more than usual in the next week or more and give her time (as long as you can stand) to bring it up herself.

Give the seed time to sprout, while letting her know implicitly that you appreciate her hearing you out on the subject.

Best luck!

[Fox]

Before I even read your response, I was watching football when she came in the room from showering naked. She made some comment about forgetting her clothes. That was her way of letting me know she wanted sex again. We started kissing and she said something about not knowing if I’d be interested after having sex twice last night. I told her I couldn’t stop thinking about our conversation about the possibility of her having sex with someone else and that her not shutting that down really excited me. She said “but I’d be too worried about disease” just like she had said before. I again told her that we could work around that and be safe. At that point we were both turned on and had great sex again. Complete with her telling me about a hot young guy she works with that all the girls want. She told me what she’d do with him if given the chance. Needless to say I came pretty hard hearing that.

[wannabcucked]

Buy her sexy outfit n heels n give her alot alot of complements. Took me 3 yrs to convert my wife into a hotwife. She was concerned like your wife but some wine, condom n seeing my hard cock. Never show any jealousy period of she will shutdown. One mistake Made is dont bring it up all tue time during sex

[Fox]

I have already told her I want her to buy something sexy so I can show her off since she just lost a few extra pounds and is back to just a little over her pre kids weight, which is actually better than her pre kids weight. She doesn’t do heels so that’s not on option. Compliments are an interesting subject. I have not been very good with that in the past but since her recent weight loss, I have been much more complimentary and I see now that I was missing the boat. It makes a huge difference in her confidence and her desire for sex. I don’t believe jealousy will be an issue for me but I guess you never know till you’re actually experiencing what I want to happen.

[Fox]

Thanks for the advice by the way. I was beginning to wonder why no one was responding.

[Iahotwifeshusband]

Keep showering her with attention and compliments. And let her think about the possibility. It is hard to wait, but she needs to get comfortable with the idea now. She has confirmed that it is possible, which is a big hurdle!

[SuddenlySlu++y]

It sounds like she’s definitely open to explore this stuff, at the least. We’re in the discussion phase ourselves. It’s great having a partner that you can actually talk about it with.

[2wheel]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

Mine says the same. Most potential fuckbuddies for my wife are just human dildos. She does have a couple that really push her buttons. One of them she hasn’t fucked yet but if she gets the chance I know she will.

That's the way she/we view her partners.

[BullInVT]

It’s a good sign for both you that she’s indicating she’d like it but just scared of negative consequences. That’s common and prudent. And reality is very different from fantasy so be warned that if it does happen it may not match your fantasy. But a good gentle approach is a good one.

[afagehi7]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

Mine says the same. Most potential fuckbuddies for my wife are just human dildos. She does have a couple that really push her buttons. One of them she hasn’t fucked yet but if she gets the chance I know she will.

You don't reveal too much about DD nor show many pics but when you drop little crumbs like this I realize how hot she is.

[Fox]

So, we had sex last night. While I was fucking her missionary she says “I was thinking about our conversation about you watching me with another man. I started to think might be hot if we were away somewhere and we get in an elevator with some hot young guy. He looks at me and I just go to him and we start kissing. He starts playing with my breasts, I start fondling his cock through his jeans.” That was as far as I got when I came. I asked if she really thought that. She said she did but don’t get too excited. She still doesn’t think she could really do it. Just having fun with the fantasy. I’m good with that. If it never really happens I live with that. We’ll see what happens in time.

[Lucky Dog]

So, we had sex last night. While I was fucking her missionary she says “I was thinking about our conversation about you watching me with another man. I started to think might be hot if we were away somewhere and we get in an elevator with some hot young guy. He looks at me and I just go to him and we start kissing. He starts playing with my breasts, I start fondling his cock through his jeans.” That was as far as I got when I came. I asked if she really thought that. She said she did but don’t get too excited. She still doesn’t think she could really do it. Just having fun with the fantasy. I’m good with that. If it never really happens I live with that. We’ll see what happens in time.

Everything has to start somewhere. That is very hot.

[36DDwife]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

Mine says the same. Most potential fuckbuddies for my wife are just human dildos. She does have a couple that really push her buttons. One of them she hasn’t fucked yet but if she gets the chance I know she will.

You don't reveal too much about DD nor show many pics but when you drop little crumbs like this I realize how hot she is.

Ha! Thanks. We are going to take more pics soon. Life sorta took center stage for a while so that fell by the wayside.

[36DDwife]

I already read your entire thread among a few others. Gives me a little hope that maybe some day she changes her mind. She has an amazing body, especially for a 48 year old. Any guy would be thrilled to fuck her. She just says that I’m all she needs or wants.

Mine says the same. Most potential fuckbuddies for my wife are just human dildos. She does have a couple that really push her buttons. One of them she hasn’t fucked yet but if she gets the chance I know she will.

That's the way she/we view her partners.

My wife likes a bit of a connection with them but will shrug & say that it’s just sex if asked. It’s like she cares but doesn’t care.