Page 1 of 20
Not sure what to do
Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2022 4:57 pm
by AmieLee
Hi everyone,
I'm a little shy about this but I have been thinking about being with another guy. I work as a waitress and one of the guys has been flirting with me. He's a bit younger (I'm 24 hes 19). I mentioned this to my husband and he said "so what are you going to do about it?." I said I don't know and laughed and he said maybe I should see what happens. I don't know I mean hes a bit younger and get the impression that he hasn't really been with a girl before. It seems kind of exciting but I'm not sure how hubby would react if i really did. I was thinking of offering him a ride home and see what happens but i am unsure in a way. Any advice?
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Sat Sep 10, 2022 9:54 pm
by armyguyot1
Welcome to the forum AmieLee. Every young guy should be so lucky as to have a more experienced older woman to teach him how to really please a woman. They don't know but want to be good at it. If he is a virgin there is a reason and you will probably have to offer more than a ride home. If he were smart enough to know what to do he wouldn't still be a virgin. It could be great for all three of you.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:54 am
by gulfcpl
If you’re husband is good with it, it’s kinda a no brainer . However, safety is always a concern. How well do you know him? One can’t be too careful these days.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Sun Sep 11, 2022 3:04 am
by Pufferfish
Sounds as if you and your husband haven't had a "real talk" about it yet. So for starters I would start with communication and making sure he would actually be as ok with it as he seems. Maybe just try getting your creative juices flowing and tell him one night in bed that you had been a bad girl and make up an elaborate story of messing around with this guy, maybe or maybe not full on sex. Maybe some oral sex or something. And see what he thinks for sure before breaking his heart a little and telling him it wasn't real yet. Then talk to him about what if it was real before deciding if you actually want to go through with it.
Or, you could just take the seemingly free hall pass you seem to have and just go with it for real and see what happens. Whatever you decide make sure it's what you actually want, and you're not just trying to please others.
As for ideas, a ride home might be a good ice breaker. Also leaves some innuendo open for when he thanks you for the ride, you can reply with something like "Maybe some day you can return the favor and I can ride you." Or some such playful nonsense. 24 and 19 is a fairly big age gap for a serious relationship, but I don't think it's much of a factor for casual fun.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:09 am
by whenwillshe
Be careful that he doesn't fall hard for you.
Be clear it is all for fun if you go through with it.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 12:26 pm
by tit5atat
All men are wired differently so you need to feel out your husband to determine how he is wired. He may be excited if you play or he may turn on you and hate you. Like mentioned above, you need to find a seductive way to explore with him and see how he responds. Then, keep in mind that what you tease him with might be a little different response in reality. He might be ok with some things and not with others. In any case, if you love your husband which it sounds like you do, then you need to know these things before you adventure too far.
A ride home together would be a good start. Tell your husband about it right away and see his reaction. If positive then go a little further next time.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 2:23 pm
by AmieLee
Ty everyone for welcome advice!
I did talk more about it with hubby this weekend and and he sort of said something similar to what some have here have said - that it could be a good experience for him and he thought it sounded pretty hot and he kind of wishes a girl had done that for him when he was 19. I asked hubby if he was really sure he would still feel the same if I really went though with it and he said he thinks so! I'm going to be working tonight with "Tom" and will see how it goes I think.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 2:53 pm
by Farmgirl
AmieLee wrote: ↑Sat Sep 10, 2022 4:57 pm
Hi everyone,
I'm a little shy about this but I have been thinking about being with another guy. I work as a waitress and one of the guys has been flirting with me. He's a bit younger (I'm 24 hes 19). I mentioned this to my husband and he said "so what are you going to do about it?." I said I don't know and laughed and he said maybe I should see what happens. I don't know I mean hes a bit younger and get the impression that he hasn't really been with a girl before. It seems kind of exciting but I'm not sure how hubby would react if i really did. I was thinking of offering him a ride home and see what happens but i am unsure in a way. Any advice?
Wait until you and your husband have had several open discussions in the light of day. After you are both on the same page, then you can decide.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 3:07 pm
by isinlarsa
All the various advice that say to establish how your husband feels are valid. His response "so what are you going to do about it" implies that he might be a good candidate to be a hotwife husband. You can follow up with a few more comments about the young kid, and see how he responses. Be prepared to follow up with other responses that can further feel him out rather than saying that you don't know. His initial response was not negative, so keep the conversation going and see where it goes.
I think 19 could be a good age for a 24 year old wife to have a fling. Let him know it's just a fling, and he can relax about it being any more than just fun. If I were an inexperienced 19 year old male, I would appreciate the experience that a slightly older woman could provide.
Re: Not sure waht to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 4:27 pm
by AmieLee
I don't see my last
post yet and sorry about misspelling in title of my very fist one. I was kind of nervous.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Mon Sep 12, 2022 5:23 pm
by AmieLee
Hi heading home now
I gave Tome a ride home I could tell he is interested when he have me a hug. I'm going to talk to hubby. I don't want to feel like I'm cheating but it feels like this could be something good for Tom and i would enjoy too.. It's so hard to know.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 12:33 am
by 2inUPMichigan
AmieLee wrote: ↑Mon Sep 12, 2022 4:27 pm
I don't see my last
post yet and sorry about misspelling in title of my very fist one. I was kind of nervous.
Not to worry, I fixed it for you
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 4:22 am
by AmieLee
Ty 2inUPMichigan :-)
I think you're right Farmgirl ("Wait until you and your husband have had several open discussions in the light of day. After you are both on the same page, then you can decide.") I talked with hubby last night. I told him I did give Tom a ride home (hubby already new I was thinking about it). I was a little nervous at first but but it went really well and he seemed so understanding and supportive. When I told him he smiled and said "oh really?" I smiled back and said "yes" and we sat down on the couch to talk. I told him we just chatted small talk but that Tom did give me a nice hug when I dropped him off and I could tell he is interested in me. I told hubby I don't want to feel like I'm cheating and then hubby said the sweetest thing. He told me how much he loves me and that because we are talking about it and being honest with how we feel it isn't cheating at all. He asked me if I was going to offer Tom a ride home again. I smiled and said "maybe" then hubby led me to out bedroom and we ended up having some of the hottest sex we have in a while!
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 5:06 am
by RemMb36+
Oh, to be that young again+ and knowing what I know today... Lol
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 12:27 pm
by AmieLee
Getting ready for work again I'm thinking will offer Tom a ride home again. Will see how it goes.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 12:58 pm
by zorro
A couple of suggestions:
1. Think of taking "baby steps" (holding hands, kissing, dancing, whatever) to report to your husband to gauge his response as you put a toe in the water. If he does well, go a little further next time and keep gauging his real-life reaction (not just what he thinks it may be like). Keep your husband 100% informed each step of the way.
2. Track your own desire and response (chemistry). Listen to what your body wants to ensure you want it. You'll know.
3. See if your husband wants to be present. That works well for some marriages; for some others not. Giving your husband some opportunities to give input on your journey can strengthen your marriage and deepen intimacy. I hope he makes your decision to play YOUR decision. Works way better that way.
4. I don't how how well it will go if Tom is a virgin. Virgins sound good on paper but in reality lack experience/knowledge/skills, so keep your expectations low. Never hurts to be pleasantly surprised. And don't be surprised if you want to do it again after Tom (or with Tom). Many women describe the experience as "amazing."
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2022 8:41 pm
by tit5atat
It sounds like your husband is fully onboard so you can take it at your pace. Actually from your description it sounds like your husband might be saying those nice things but really deep down he might be very excited about the prospect of you fucking Tom. He just might be too shy to say it out right in fear that you might lose respect for him.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Wed Sep 14, 2022 3:53 pm
by AmieLee
Hi again ty everyone
I did give Tom a ride home again we just chatted but when we got to his place he leaned over and kissed. I kissed back and I knew he was excited. I just felt shouldn't leave like that so did reach over and helped him undo pants and then while we kissed i stroked him until he finished. It was really was exciting. I told hubby when I got home and he said as long as I like it and not keeping secrets its ok. I'm thinking of going further but now I'm really not sure I mean is a big step.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Wed Sep 14, 2022 4:23 pm
by Her number1
No need to move any faster than you are ready for, enjoy the whole journey.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 2:07 am
by AmieLee
Thanks for advice Her number1 :-)
I was thinking about what you said too tit5atat
"It sounds like your husband is fully onboard so you can take it at your pace. Actually from your description it sounds like your husband might be saying those nice things but really deep down he might be very excited about the prospect of you fucking Tom. He just might be too shy to say it out right in fear that you might lose respect for him."
Hubby and I did talk more after I told him about the hand job. After I told him he smiled and said "really?" and I said "yes really." He wanted to know some more details about how it happened and I told him. When he asked me if I enjoyed it I told him I did. Then he asked me if I wanted to do it again and I told him "yes I think so." Hubby then smiled and said said "I bet Tom would say yes." That made me smile and laugh a little and made me feel more relaxed and comfortable taking about it :-). Hubby then asked me if I could show him what happened. I was a little surprised but said "sure." We were sitting on couch so I moved closer and started kissing him. He kissed me back very nicely and then I reached down and helped him undo and slide down his pants some and stroked him until he finished while we kissed like I did with Tom. It was so exciting and I could tell hubby was really into it too! After we cleaned up we cuddled and hubby told me how much he loves me and I told him how much I loved him too. I'm starting to feel like this could actually bring us closer together! :-)
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 4:22 am
by superb101
Sounds like you perhaps need to put your mouth on his cock now and then let him touch you to show him how to give you pleasure? Just thinkin'!
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 7:06 am
by zorro
Nice baby step! Congratulations.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 8:15 am
by Mr1SexyGILF
AmieLee wrote: ↑Thu Sep 15, 2022 2:07 am
Thanks for advice Her number1 :-)
I was thinking about what you said too tit5atat
"It sounds like your husband is fully onboard so you can take it at your pace. Actually from your description it sounds like your husband might be saying those nice things but really deep down he might be very excited about the prospect of you fucking Tom. He just might be too shy to say it out right in fear that you might lose respect for him."
Hubby and I did talk more after I told him about the hand job. After I told him he smiled and said "really?" and I said "yes really." He wanted to know some more details about how it happened and I told him. When he asked me if I enjoyed it I told him I did. Then he asked me if I wanted to do it again and I told him "yes I think so." Hubby then smiled and said said "I bet Tom would say yes." That made me smile and laugh a little and made me feel more relaxed and comfortable taking about it :-). Hubby then asked me if I could show him what happened. I was a little surprised but said "sure." We were sitting on couch so I moved closer and started kissing him. He kissed me back very nicely and then I reached down and helped him undo and slide down his pants some and stroked him until he finished while we kissed like I did with Tom. It was so exciting and I could tell hubby was really into it too! After we cleaned up we cuddled and hubby told me how much he loves me and I told him how much I loved him too. I'm starting to feel like this could actually bring us closer together! :-)
Welcum to OHW AmieLee
I find your Tale (or Tail) of a Blossoming Sexuality into ENM (Ethical Non-Monogamy) fascinating. Extremely few couples have the necessary maturity, trust, communication, and open minds to successfully venture into this lifestyle at such a young age.
Be assured lots of others also appreciate you taking the time to bring us along on this journey. In just 5 days, your thread already has 22 replies and 2,400 views. Tom is a very lucky young man. When I was 19, I fantasized about finding an experienced lady like you, to assist in my sexual development.
I have not seen it mentioned here in your thread, and you may not be aware yet, there is a special forum on this site that is only accessible to the Verified Hotwives. You could gain a lot from the collective wisdom of these amazing ladies, if you choose to get verified and join them.
You are playing this perfectly for the enhancement of the relationship with your husband. My $0.02 worth of advice is to always keep that as your top priority in this adventure, and make this a shared adventure with him. Communication with your spouse is the secret to success in the Hotwife Lifestyle.
Mr GILF
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 9:34 am
by Lookingforadventure
Yes. We verified hot wives are a fun bunch of ladies and would love to have you join us
It sounds like you are doing a great job. You are communicating well and taking things at a pace that feels comfortable for both you and your husband. That is key to success in this sort of lifestyle.
I wonder if you and your husband want to talk and think through a few more of the "what if's". For example, you said that you waitress and Tom is a guy at work. I'm assuming that means that other people in town see you flirting with him and giving him a ride home. What will you do if your boss asks you about it? Or how will your husband feel if one of his good friends sees you with another man? I'm not saying that you should expect the worst, but it is often helpful to think through the possible complications.
For myself, I keep my sex-capades very far from my work. I don't want to risk there being any professional complications. As for if someone we knew ever found out, we've agreed that we would be honest with them and let them know that my husband is always totally aware and supportive of what I'm doing. And we'd be available to answer any questions the family member or friend might have.
Re: Not sure what to do
Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2022 11:18 am
by tit5atat
It sounds like your hubby really gets off on your adventures. Yes, in many cases these activities can really bring your relationship to a whole new level. It did with me and my fiance. She used to have a bf and often fuck him. When I proposed to her, she started recording vids of their encounters and sending to me. It is the hottest thing to watch to this day. Often we watch together.
