How many wives brought up the fantasy first?

[Gardener]

From what I have read and heard the husband is usually the one who introduces the idea of hotwifing/cuckolding. But I would really like to hear from couples where the wife has introduced the idea. This interests me because a few years ago my wife confided in me that she fantasized about me watching her with another man. I have always been into femdom (we have been spicing things up with pegging and cross dressing since we met), so I was familiar with cuckolding. But I was not prepared for how much this would excite me. I had seen cuckold porn, but I could not admit how much it turned me on when I came across it in femdom porn. After she told me about this fantasy I became very into the idea. I have shared my fantasies with her, but her opening up and showing me this side of her really turned me on.

I have no idea if we would pursue this beyond fantasy, but I'm interested to hear other people's experiences. There is a catch 22 that will likely keep us from making this fantasy a reality. If she told me she wanted to do it I would be on board and would love to make this fantasy come true for her. But I want it to come from her, that's part of the appeal for me. I feel like looks a lot of women are coaxed into this. Many seem to enjoy it once they try, but I don't want it badly enough to push her to do anything she doesn't want to do. Anyway, looking forward to see what people have to share on this one.

[Allinfun]

I wonder how often the wife bringing it up results from her interest in someone in particular (or her having already acted on it in some way).

[DavaoMike]

As I described in my initial post years ago, I met my now Filipina wife, Maricel, in Davao, Philippines while I was temporarily living there. She was my live-in girlfriend. One day, I came home early and caught her in bed with who I later learned was her first boyfriend, Arsenio, the one who had taken her virginity. At the time, she was very apologetic and crying. Arsenio seemed fearing for his life and hurriedly left. I then told Maricel that it was okay with me if she had a boyfriend as long as we never had any secrets between us and I was always number one. The rest is history. I brought Maricel to the U.S. on a fiancée visa and married her.

So, in a sense, our cuckolding relationship was her idea by her actions, but it was me who told her that it’s okay with me if she’s fucking another guy.

DM

[tosaintsfan]

Not sure she brought it up first, but the first time I became aware of the fact she may have been interested in some non-conventional arrangement happened in a sex shop.

WE were browsing in a sex shop, when a clerk asked Marla if she could be of help. Marla asked to see cock cages. Although I was aware of such devices, I never had seen one never mind contemplating wearing one. I was shocked and embarrassed at the same time. About a week later, I was wearing one. I know this is not the cuckold forum, that is how we got started in hotwifing/cuckolding.

TO

[Tank Turner]

I could never hope to remember that. We were thinking if for a long time before we talked about it. I'd go with us bring it up at the same time.

[Freemans892]

From Reddit forums, the pattern indicates that the wife will likely suggest an “open marriage”, ENM or swinging model, when moving away from their existing monogamous model.

Another scenario is where, at the start of a relationship, the girlfriend already has an FWB/FB or multiple FWBs/FBs and wants to retain them.

[IndyGreg]

My hot wife Becky brought it up many years ago. We have had a lot of fun ever since, especailly her.

[isinlarsa]

I must be drawn to such women, because its happened to me three times. I doubt I would have ever had a hotwife if she hadn't proposed it first.

My first wife and I started by swapping with a couple we were friends with from church. (That's another story.) Then she decided on her own to start an affair with a co-worker when they were alone together in the office in the afternoons. She couldn't keep a secret, and told me; but only after she had made me go down on her cum-filled pussy. We both found so hot that we decided she would continue. That marriage ended but not because of sex. We kept fucking for a while after we were divorced.

The second was my long-term girlfriend who met a man when she was taking dancing lessons. She said he was hitting on her and she was interested. We agreed it would be hot for her to take a lover, so she started dating him. He introduced her into swinging, but that's another story. Ironically, we stayed together until she decided she wanted to stop the open relationship, and find a man she could have children with.

The third was my second wife. We had been exclusive for 18 years (married 16), although there was a short period when we started dating where she also was having sex with other men. However, after 16 years of marriage when she was 44, she came to me and said she wanted to date again. She knew of my previous background, so she was pretty sure I would be on board -- which I was. That hotwife period lasted about two years.

[wordlover2000]

With us, my wife did it first...with a qualified "sort of." Out of the clear blue one day, she started fantasizing out loud for both of us during sex. This went on for quite a while and were elaborate and detailed fantasies, full of really nasty talk from her. They were always about another person joining us in bed...I'd say 75% of them were about another man joining us, and 25% about another woman. One day I told her I wanted to experience it for real. I could tell from her reaction that she was genuinely surprised, and had undoubtedly thought these were all just fantasies. She gave me a "let me think about it," but was on board something like 48 hours later. So I still give HER all the credit for breaking the ice between us on the topic (leading to all the wonderful experiences).

[rogerg]

My wife was the first to bring up the fantasy. She was also the first to suggest that we should turn the fantasy into a reality and was the one who set up our first encounter. Even now she is the one that tends to suggest new things for us to explore.

[Mike_B]

My told me she was going to cuck me vs suggesting!

[Mike_B]

My told me she was going to cuck me vs suggesting!

[luvwives999]

Hard to say. We had a MMF which I first proposed, and she was more than ok with. After that, she would go to his apartment without me, telling me she was going there to get fucked which I was totally on board with.

[LongTermHubby]

My wife brought it up first.

[BT2]

This was a second go round for both my wife and for me. We chatted about experiences, shared fantasies, went to the nude beach, went to the occasional porn movie, flashed, etc. We thought it would be something different if we arranged for her to have a bodyrub. It was on the first bodyrub that there was mutual sexual touching with someone other than ourselves and the third when she engaged in intercourse.

I believe it was me, with no opposition from her, who first suggested the body rub. I know it was she who first willingly engaged in intercourse.

[Mike_B]

My wife brought it up first.

My wife not only brought it up, she told me she was going to cuck me!

[dinoo]

My wife was the first to bring up the fantasy.
Once she asked me if, while we were fucking, I ever imagined to fuck another woman.
My answer was negative.
Of course I asked her the same question.
Her answer: "Yes, I do so every now and then."
I asked her if I knew this man.
She answered "Yes, but there are more than one."
I asked her if she would tell me when it would happen in reality.
"Naturally, that would please me" she said.

This "conversation" happened long before she became a real HW.

[LongTermHubby]

My wife brought it up first.

My wife not only brought it up, she told me she was going to cuck me!

My wife made it clear it was going to happen. I agreed to it because I didn't want her sneaking off behind my back.

[wordlover2000]

I've described this elsewhere on the board before. My wife was the first to broach it, although it was in the context of her fantasizing out loud for both of us in order to spice up our sex life (and did it ever!). The fantasies always involved another person joining us in bed, usually a man but sometimes a woman. And sometimes a stranger, but often someone we both knew. And the fantasies were VIVID. Finally at one point I said (in my typical non-eloquent way), "I want do this for real. I want to watch you suck another guy's cock." She stopped dead and said, "You're kidding." I assured her I wasn't. 48 hours later she said yes, and roughly a month after that I was the proud and horny husband of a fully fucked new hotwife (and yes, she loved the experience).

[dcdb]

We started reading Penthouse Forum and agreed to have an open discussion about what turned us on with the various stories. She was getting really hot around certain stories, one in particular was a couple in New Orleans who rented out rooms in their house during Mardi Gras week. After a few years the wife was visiting the rooms of 2 guests every night and was naked all day. That one tripped her, and what turned her on got me turned on, so she was the instigator when we look back. I never once even thought about it until then.

[Mike_B]

My wife brought it up first.

My wife not only brought it up, she told me she was going to cuck me!

My wife made it clear it was going to happen. I agreed to it because I didn't want her sneaking off behind my back.

Did it turn you on at all? My wife being so direct telling me she was going to cuck me was a major turn on for me!

[LongTermHubby]

My wife brought it up first.

My wife not only brought it up, she told me she was going to cuck me!

My wife made it clear it was going to happen. I agreed to it because I didn't want her sneaking off behind my back.

Did it turn you on at all? My wife being so direct telling me she was going to cuck me was a major turn on for me!

Looking back, it was classical angst, a heady mixture of excitement and fear.

[Mike_B]

My wife not only brought it up, she told me she was going to cuck me!

My wife made it clear it was going to happen. I agreed to it because I didn't want her sneaking off behind my back.

Did it turn you on at all? My wife being so direct telling me she was going to cuck me was a major turn on for me!

Looking back, it was classical angst, a heady mixture of excitement and fear.

Did any off your fears come true? My fear of being put in panties when he visited actually happened but the humiliation turned into a big turn on! Panties have been a game changer!

[zorro]

It wasn't a wife, but one of the GFs I enjoyed between marriages/LTR was a woman who had been married once to a man who was the only man she had ever had sex with. I was the second man she had had sex with in 40 years.

As we got to know each other better, I told her about the many MFMs I had been in and how wonderful they were. One night as we were lying in bed, out of the blue she asked, "You know those MFMs you did? Can we do one of those?"

"Of course we can." And did. Not just one but many. Over time, the main question she asked was, "You mean, I can have all the sex I want." Big smiles when I told her of course she can. She eventually put up a single female's profile on SLS. When we got together, she would just say, "Number 11" to keep me up to date about her conquests.

She was fun, while it lasted.

[hornedhubby]

Please go on, Z. Very intriguing story.