Married men vs Single men pros/cons

[BD8280]

Firstly apologies I know this question has been asked many times before, but fortunately I finally find myself in this position after 6 years! My wife seems finally keen to set up a profile and search out some guys.
One thing on my mind is this question between married men and single guys, are there any obvious things to look out for before diving in. I understand the moral issue around playing with married men and am happy to hear people’s thoughts on this too.
Thanks in advance for any replies

[leggysman]

Seems like on balance, single guys are more likely to be available, and less likely to have to cancel at short notice. They're more likely to be taking care of their appearance.

Married guys are less likely to be clingy, or to try to escalate the relationship part beyond a certain point. STIs are somewhat less of a worry, if your wife is the only other woman he's seeing (assuming his wife is not also sleeping around!)

Ethically, a reasonable argument can be made that the moral transgression is squarely on the person sneaking around, breaching trust, breaking their marriage vows, etc. It does seem fair to ask yourselves what that says about his character. But other peoples' inner lives are unknowable, and sometimes they have their justifications.

Leggysandy doesn't knowingly participate in cheating. If she felt differently, I would be okay with that, but I prefer her approach of trying to keep everything and everyone honest and above-board. Even if it means that sometimes a great candidate gets passed over

[warmnsalty]

We both prefer attached guys. The downside if obviously availability but the upsides make the extra effort worth it. Mrs Warm isn't fucking for feelings she's fucking for fun. Sport fucking, attached guys are the same, just wanting some new pussy so it's a good fit. Realize there's a moral component that some find objectionable, in our opinion sport fucking is far less dangerous than emotional relationships. Also prefer to fuck bare, so attached guys are a safer option. Not that single guys are off limits, not at all just have found that they are less reliable, seems counter intuitive but we get stood up or flaked on by singles far more often than married guys.

[CaliLondon]

We prefer single. Unless the married guy is in an open relationship, he's lying to his wife. If he's lying to her, we figure he's probably lying to us as well.

[adamgunnauthor]

We've had fun in all three scenarios - the single guy, the married guy who has his wife's permission, and the cheating married guy. We really didn't find a lot of difference.

If guys got too clingy, we simply dropped them. (In one case, my wife was too involved with a single guy, she started breaking rules, I vetoed the relationship.)

There's always the possibility that a cheating married guys wife will find out, will find out your name / phone number / address and cause drama. We had it happen once, fortunately my wife promised her it would never happen again and the other wife didn't create a huge scene.

[Gulfcpl]

We only get with single guys. I don’t agree that if a married guy is cheating, it’s only on him. Just our opinion but if we know he’s cheating, we are enabling his infidelity and are just as guilty. Each couple has must do what they feel is right. We just don’t buy the sob story that he never gets any at home. Maybe it’s because she is too busy raising kids, cooking and cleaning while he is out getting strange. Again all, this is just our take on it and isn’t meant to judge the lifestyle of others.

[isinlarsa]

My wife will only do single guys, because she can't abide a cheater, and doubts them when married men say their wives are okay with them fucking other wives. Funny though. When she was single she did get fucked by married men. I guess her morals have gotten stricter.

[glassfull]

I find it a little strange that my wife who is quite traditional and conservative in her outlook does not bat an eye when it comes to fucking married men. In her long ago single days she fucked several, mostly co-workers, but from other areas of her large company. Since marriage, she's had a few brief 'flings' and one longer term condoned 'affair,' also with a married man. He was a business traveller from a distant city, so there was little chance his wife would find out. My point is, she's never seemed to have a moral aversion to it.

Currently she is slowly working (with my encouragement) on another 'affair,' again with an attached man. The fact he's attached doesn't bother her at all, but the fact there is always a possibility of him getting caught, does.

Personally, I think married men are safer for many of the reasons already mentioned in other posts. Probably they tend to be more reliable too. But in her present situation, my wife (me too!) is a little bit frustrated with his chronic lack of availability. My wife is semi-retired with very flexible time, but finding his 'date' time is usually about 1.5 hours for lunch on a certain day between his obligations to his partner doesn't allow for very much intimacy.

[Tank Turner]

My wife thinks that married men are less likely to have STDs. What she thinks is really an opinion. There's no scientific proof supporting her opinion.

We've been lucky...or smart. My wife will vet the hell out of any dude she intends to invite to join us. If she merely suspects a dude of having an STD, she'll eliminate him.

Many years ago, before we married and after learning that my wife was extremely sexually active, especially during college, she told me she never contracted an STD. I asked her how she managed to escape a disease. She said she listened to what dudes said to her, watched their body language, and always having sex with at least one light on that was bright enough for her to inspect their cocks helped her decide. She knew that discharges from cocks, especially foul smelling discharges, were a danger signal. She's been on birth control since she was in puberty as medicine for a hormonal problem. She told guys that she was on birth control. She said if a guy suggested using a condom after she told him it was safe to cum inside of her, she considered it a red flag but not necessarily exclusionary.

Of course, her STD prevention protocol helped but it was far from scientific. I think she was lucky and smart to avoid dudes who might have had an STD.

[adamgunnauthor]

bright enough for her to inspect their cocks helped her decide. She knew that discharges from cocks, especially foul smelling discharges, were a danger signal.

Mary was also of this school. She always assumed that any guy she was thinking about taking to bed was also fucking other women.

When she met a guy, she looked at him and his sanitary habits. Was he dirty or had he showered recently? Were his teeth clean and in good health? If there was any doubt, she wouldn't engage with him. When she got naked with someone, she would sniff his cock, balls and taste the precum. Again, any sign of dirtiness, and she assumed he was diseased. He might get a hand job and be allowed to give her oral sex, but never any penetration.

[sandy691196]

We both prefer attached guys. The downside if obviously availability but the upsides make the extra effort worth it. Mrs Warm isn't fucking for feelings she's fucking for fun. Sport fucking, attached guys are the same, just wanting some new pussy so it's a good fit. Realize there's a moral component that some find objectionable, in our opinion sport fucking is far less dangerous than emotional relationships. Also prefer to fuck bare, so attached guys are a safer option. Not that single guys are off limits, not at all just have found that they are less reliable, seems counter intuitive but we get stood up or flaked on by singles far more often than married guys.

Married guys score way higher.. Stable, bored, enthusiastic, safe, they know their way around a "wife" in bed, they know the husband's perspective..
They don't try any "funny tricks". Maybe the usual "I like you better than my wife in bed".. or "this is a first for me (referring to some great sexual episode). It tickles your wife pink. You smirk because you know its all a game. No harm no foul!
And boy they can be patient in bed! I mean when comes to getting wives off who take a long time!

[Cdncuck]

My wife flat out prefers married. They don't get clingy. They don't talk and they know when to go home. They aren't going to be wanting to spend time with her at Xmas or Thanksgiving. They are tired into all the same family activities as we are during the holidays. There is no moral issue as far as my wife is concerned. She says the sex you have with someone you love isn't the same as sports fucking so she has no problem with bedding married men.

[Her number1]

This is like so many other things in life; it's a personal decision.
It's easy for some to take the position that fucking a married man is wrong, and just as easy for others to say it's not on them. Moral problem, not really when one realizes that we all break certain laws and rules of society. It's just that each of us has a different rule, law, expectation, that we are willing to cross.
The problem is when we want to hold our standards as the best when we don't do everything "right". But it's easier to judge someone else.
Farmgirl has seen single and married, but the married far outnumber the singles. Married men are, to her, and I agree, simply safer all the way around.

[Johnann2227]

In out hotwifing Ann only plays with single guys. We do not want to be the cause of a marriage break-up.
Swinging wise we prefer attached couples who are genuinely in love rather than FWBs who are just out for a new experience.

[mychubbyhotwife]

Married men are no breakfast, no staymates. Their relations with their wives are not yours to consider and can be way too complicated to discuss. Single men and are more likely to become emotionally attached which can cause many problems.

[carolinacuck]

C's lovers have been split basically 50/50 between married vs single. A couple of other pros/cons not mentioned....1. By excluding married men, you're in essence reducing the potential candidate pool of men by at least 50%. C always had the opinion that most of the hot studs were "taken" and that the best sex she had tended to be with married men. 2. A negative would be that married men don't have a place to play typically, unless they're from out of town visiting on business. We've had a few different married guys she's entertained at our place...sometimes without me being there. Neighbors tend to notice that stuff.

[kort677]

we really don't care but since we aren't interested in any sort of ongoing relationship married guys seem to be on the same page

[GenerallySpeaking]

This is like so many other things in life; it's a personal decision.
It's easy for some to take the position that fucking a married man is wrong, and just as easy for others to say it's not on them. Moral problem, not really when one realizes that we all break certain laws and rules of society. It's just that each of us has a different rule, law, expectation, that we are willing to cross.
The problem is when we want to hold our standards as the best when we don't do everything "right". But it's easier to judge someone else.
Farmgirl has seen single and married, but the married far outnumber the singles. Married men are, to her, and I agree, simply safer all the way around.

Safer for who?

[Parsifal]

Galatea says she prefers married overall, with a few notable exceptions, one of which is a current regular of hers. The married guys, she thinks, are hornier and tend to be of better quality. After all, they ARE married; someone else really wants them. It's validating for her because it tells her that having sex with her is worth a big risk. She's turned on by the taboo aspect of it too, which is a key dynamic of the affair game we play with each other. For someone with a cum festish like her, it's a lower health risk to consort with partners in presumably lower circulation. To be sure, there is the moral dilemma brought on by complicity in deceit; however, as she views it, some sins are venial, others mortal. She's not there to alienate the affections of any married partner may feel for his wife, only to provide a mostly physical outlet, which in turn keeps that marriage from souring any more than it might.

[Very Hot Wife]

Some great viewpoints here, all completely valid.

When we're in a club and Becky decides she'd like to play with a guy, we wouldn't ask if he was married or single. Why would we, it's none of our business.

That changes slightly when we're not in a club but fundamentally it's the same. If Becky started to see him regularly, we'd probably find out the truth soon enough and sound him out about getting his wife's view on his activities.

Married men are probably more reliable when it comes to regular meets, they can often get a sense of a relationship forming. Not one that would necessarily threaten our relationship, but just one of genuine friendship with added benefits of course.

The other factor is our preference for bareback fun and as mentioned above, it's more likely that he will be clean. No guarantees of course, but on balance probably safer. We prefer it if he gets an STI test before playing of course

We regularly swap with a couple that live nearby. We all get tested if one of us plays with a new playmate, otherwise we just go bare every time with them.

[starbuckslvr]

We are open to married men or single men. Single men though are far more unreliable. We've had more single men flake, ghost us or not show up for a scheduled meet n greet.
Even the ones that we have met and my wife has played with eventually ghosted us.
When I've had the opportunity to meet a wife or couple, I make it a point to be a gentleman at all times. I've learned from what the wrong things others have done to us.
Good luck and enjoy the ride.

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

Some wives get wrapped around the axel on the fidelity thing. I don't because we don't know the real situation. The man could be a selfish cheater, or he could be in a sexless marriage with a nagging bitch of a wife. I prefer not to judge and condemn them. And, they will cheat regardless, so why not with me?

A single guy is mostly always available, but he's also probably a man-whore and risky. The married man isn't available all the time, requires planning, but he has something to lose so he's more careful.

Honestly I prefer married men. I don't need to be super spontaneous with children around. I usually prefer planning ahead a little and knowing the man is less likely to pass a disease.

[JayR693]

I've been a Bull for 40 years. I was not looking for my 1st experience, a couple I knew invited me into their intimate world. At first I was shocked and hesitant, but soon discovered the joys and realized my wife was a best friend but would never be the sexual partner I needed. Early on one of the couples I found shared this with me when we were 1st in contact:
Why a married guy, he knows what he wants as many are not getting it at home. They are not overly cocky, follow the rules, don’t want to get attached and don’t want to fall in love, they just want sex, be friends and have a good time, married men need to be discrete and keep their new found success to themselves. And lastly they go home when they need to.

[BT2]

When we started out, my wife didn't specify single or married. In fact, it never came to our minds. Thinking back, single guys were probably more easy to meet and more readily available. My wife prefers bareback, and it is also my preference that she does bareback. About twenty years ago we started to worry about diseases, and we thought that the safest way to have intimate sex would be with men who were married and who played with their wife's permission. It certainly cut down on the number of fbs available, or their ease at last minute meetings, but after a few false starts she met and has been having intimate sex with the same two guys for about 15 years, and safety has never been a concern.

[dkcuck123]

Like above, we never thought about it, probably since the potential issues were really a choice for him. But if we knew they were married we generally passed, even if she really wanted him. Her partners were generally single given how she met them (bars/online) but we both would never bet that some of them were not quietly married/cheating.