Ashley Madison or other app advice

[Myhusbandsaysgoforit]

Very new to this, I created a profile on Ashley Madison 2 nights ago with my husband, put one uncropped face shot on my profile, along with some basic stats. Within 2 days I’ve had about 70 responses, text/chatted with 5 that seem great, and have four intro first dates lined up this week.

Looking for any advice or recommendations from experienced women on best ways to stay safe - all dates are in public places downtown, 3 are lunch, on is drinks at an upscale speakeasy.

My husband says there’s a women’s only forum, I would like to get verified and move this conversation there once I’m approved.

Thanks!

[afagehi7]

Very new to this, I created a profile on Ashley Madison 2 nights ago with my husband, put one uncropped face shot on my profile, along with some basic stats. Within 2 days I’ve had about 70 responses, text/chatted with 5 that seem great, and have four intro first dates lined up this week.

Looking for any advice or recommendations from experienced women on best ways to stay safe - all dates are in public places downtown, 3 are lunch, on is drinks at an upscale speakeasy.

My husband says there’s a women’s only forum, I would like to get verified and move this conversation there once I’m approved.

Thanks!

Verification requirements. Usually good to participate a bit viewtopic.php?f=5&t=53838

[Myhusbandsaysgoforit]

Very new to this, I created a profile on Ashley Madison 2 nights ago with my husband, put one uncropped face shot on my profile, along with some basic stats. Within 2 days I’ve had about 70 responses, text/chatted with 5 that seem great, and have four intro first dates lined up this week.

Looking for any advice or recommendations from experienced women on best ways to stay safe - all dates are in public places downtown, 3 are lunch, on is drinks at an upscale speakeasy.

My husband says there’s a women’s only forum, I would like to get verified and move this conversation there once I’m approved.

Thanks!

Verification requirements. Usually good to participate a bit viewtopic.php?f=5&t=53838

My husband read me the note you sent him with all of the safety recommendations. It’s news I can use! Can you send it to me here thanks!

[Natatude]

Very new to this, I created a profile on Ashley Madison 2 nights ago with my husband, put one uncropped face shot on my profile, along with some basic stats. Within 2 days I’ve had about 70 responses, text/chatted with 5 that seem great, and have four intro first dates lined up this week.

Looking for any advice or recommendations from experienced women on best ways to stay safe - all dates are in public places downtown, 3 are lunch, on is drinks at an upscale speakeasy.

My husband says there’s a women’s only forum, I would like to get verified and move this conversation there once I’m approved.

Thanks!

Hello, nice to meet you, please do get verified and come join us. The safest way we do it is meet them for lunch or drinks, get to know them for a couple of hours and then hubby and I decide if we wanna go further. We both have to like him. And the second time we meet for sex. We meet at a hotel with a bar, I then go upstairs to get ready. I text for my lover to come up and we spend an hour alone and then I text hubby to join us. And if all goes well after that I can meet my lover whenever or wherever without hubby the next time. Good luck!

[ncnj1]

Hi all, I’m Myhusbandsaysgoforit’s husband.

10 days after I helped her create her account, it got suspended. Looking for advice.

When we first created her account she went through the verification process which uses Persona, a 3rd party verification system. It had her take pictures of her face and pictures of her photo ID using their app. She had to do it in my phone because there’s a known issue using any 3rd party camera app on the iPhone 14pro.

Problem is I’ve been out of the country for the last week and will be home Wednesday evening. I can help her reverify when I get home, and hope it was just a glitch and that her account will be reinstated after reverifying.

She suspects she was suspended for “redirecting” men off the site - after one or two messages she arranges a phone call using a Google voice number, if that goes well she arranges a meet/greet date by text (using the same Google voice number). She read that AM gets paused if you do that because they make their money by men paying for each chat exchange.

Has anyone run into this before? Considering AM’s reputation for having few real women on the site it seems crazy that they would block the real ones.


and she’s getting emails to go through the verification process.

[kort677]

ashley madison doesn't seem to like it when people try to take their talk to other sites, my wife has also been tossed from the site which is a shame because it yielded many potentials for her

[BrunetteLover]

As far as staying safe, do your own research, do not leave it up to a website. My wife has been an escort for nearly 15 years, has met with nearly 200 men, and the only time we had a problem was at a party where she was the stripper. There were some nutty guys there who we had no idea who they were.

Learn how to do BG checks using open source information. There is an amazing amount of information out there that can be accessed with no credentials other than being a curious civilian.

Start with full name including middle, and his age and home town (where the person has an address, but you don't need the full address).

Search for the person using different combinations of the information given. See what pops up.

Best case is you will find an address, maybe some employment information, and worst case (but it's good you found it) bad info such as a news article.

Most importantly, you want to determine if the person you are meeting with is who he says he is.

From there, there are many techniques to insure safety while the adventure is unfolding in real time. Hubby is a big part of that, actually an even bigger part of the wife's safety than the wife is.

One thing I have to warn you... if you are meeting new men, be advised that hubby HAS to be able to handle ANY situation that may arise that breaks sideways.

Think of the worst screw up in researching a guy's background. He totally bullshitted you, is a total nut and is now strong-arming you out the back door of a bar or restaurant.

Can hubby deliver all the medicine prescribed to cure this hiccup, here and now, with no effort on your part? Yes, the goal is to have fun, but the first goal is to be completely safe.

If he cannot or will not, best to stay home.

(Note: my wife has had many, many clients who have told her that they enjoy her company because she is so relaxed around them. Men who live in rural areas (vacation cabins) could not believe that she was willing to go up lonely rural roads to meet (and fuck) them. Or to saunter into hotels, have mind-bending orgasms, and casually get dressed and leave without seeming nervous around them. That comfort level has led to great times and lots and lots of great sex with many men. But the comfort level cannot be achieved without some work as described above)

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

Sounds like your wife ENJOYS the sex act and is comfortable (doesn't give AF) with the labels attached to that work. My guess is she sees it as fun, a challenge, a game. That is why she puts her men at ease.

I've been on AM. I like married men. I don't judge them. Some are greedy aholes, but many are men in sexless marriages but they want to honor the life commitment they made and not leave their spouse who they still love. I chat, then talk/video, with the men from any app before a meeting. I have accepted money when I was fulfilling my escort/prostitute fantasy, but I usually don't.

[ncnj1]

As far as staying safe, do your own research, do not leave it up to a website. My wife has been an escort for nearly 15 years, has met with nearly 200 men, and the only time we had a problem was at a party where she was the stripper. There were some nutty guys there who we had no idea who they were.

Learn how to do BG checks using open source information. There is an amazing amount of information out there that can be accessed with no credentials other than being a curious civilian.

Start with full name including middle, and his age and home town (where the person has an address, but you don't need the full address).

Search for the person using different combinations of the information given. See what pops up.

Best case is you will find an address, maybe some employment information, and worst case (but it's good you found it) bad info such as a news article.

Most importantly, you want to determine if the person you are meeting with is who he says he is.

From there, there are many techniques to insure safety while the adventure is unfolding in real time. Hubby is a big part of that, actually an even bigger part of the wife's safety than the wife is.

One thing I have to warn you... if you are meeting new men, be advised that hubby HAS to be able to handle ANY situation that may arise that breaks sideways.

Think of the worst screw up in researching a guy's background. He totally bullshitted you, is a total nut and is now strong-arming you out the back door of a bar or restaurant.

Can hubby deliver all the medicine prescribed to cure this hiccup, here and now, with no effort on your part? Yes, the goal is to have fun, but the first goal is to be completely safe.

If he cannot or will not, best to stay home.

(Note: my wife has had many, many clients who have told her that they enjoy her company because she is so relaxed around them. Men who live in rural areas (vacation cabins) could not believe that she was willing to go up lonely rural roads to meet (and fuck) them. Or to saunter into hotels, have mind-bending orgasms, and casually get dressed and leave without seeming nervous around them. That comfort level has led to great times and lots and lots of great sex with many men. But the comfort level cannot be achieved without some work as described above)

Thanks Brunettelover, sounds like you two have an amazing system worked out. My wife prefers to do more herself, and is looking for one or two long term boyfriends rather than quantity. She had a lot of dating experience before we were married.

Her approach which seems to be working so far is chat on the app a little bit, switch to Google voice for a phone call to see if the vibe is right, then make plans to meet in person in a safe place (usually a coffee or lunch date downtown). If everything goes well then a few more dates of escalating intensity before any serious intimacy.

She’s had 5 or 6 first dates where she pulled the plug due to lack of chemistry, another first date lined up for Monday. She had one that went almost all the way - 3 daytime dates then he flaked last minute trying to make plans for a dinner time with potential for overnight date tonight.

AM reinstated her account a few days ago without her needing to redo the photo verification, their email said it was a random review that was completed. She lost all her in-app conversations, but luckily she had favorited the men she was hadn’t yet moved to Google voice and is able to re-establish contact.

I’m realizing that she didn’t even have the last name of the man she was going to have a 4th date with tonight. We’re going to talk through your recommendations and find a middle ground.

Thank you!

Ncnj1

[ncnj1]

Hi Mrs_hoteifecplsa, my wife really likes AM. Similar to you, she doesn’t judge married men. I’ve suggested AFF and Feeld based on recommendations and research but after a quick look she thinks AFF is too seedy and so far isn’t into the idea of me doing a first round screening for her to weed out the dick pics and obvious non-starters.

I’m hoping she’ll login and post more so she can get verified but she’s already struggling with how much time the sorting/dating process takes. She’s basically retired, I have no idea how women with full time jobs find the time!

NCNJ1

Sounds like your wife ENJOYS the sex act and is comfortable (doesn't give AF) with the labels attached to that work. My guess is she sees it as fun, a challenge, a game. That is why she puts her men at ease.

I've been on AM. I like married men. I don't judge them. Some are greedy aholes, but many are men in sexless marriages but they want to honor the life commitment they made and not leave their spouse who they still love. I chat, then talk/video, with the men from any app before a meeting. I have accepted money when I was fulfilling my escort/prostitute fantasy, but I usually don't.

[BrunetteLover]

Thanks Brunettelover, sounds like you two have an amazing system worked out. My wife prefers to do more herself, and is looking for one or two long term boyfriends rather than quantity. She had a lot of dating experience before we were married.

Her approach which seems to be working so far is chat on the app a little bit, switch to Google voice for a phone call to see if the vibe is right, then make plans to meet in person in a safe place (usually a coffee or lunch date downtown). If everything goes well then a few more dates of escalating intensity before any serious intimacy.

She’s had 5 or 6 first dates where she pulled the plug due to lack of chemistry, another first date lined up for Monday. She had one that went almost all the way - 3 daytime dates then he flaked last minute trying to make plans for a dinner time with potential for overnight date tonight.

AM reinstated her account a few days ago without her needing to redo the photo verification, their email said it was a random review that was completed. She lost all her in-app conversations, but luckily she had favorited the men she was hadn’t yet moved to Google voice and is able to re-establish contact.

I’m realizing that she didn’t even have the last name of the man she was going to have a 4th date with tonight. We’re going to talk through your recommendations and find a middle ground.

Thank you!

Ncnj1

Ok, you will consider using my BG check system. Good.

Next: now imagine if every tenth guy is Rex Huerman.

Can you handle that as well?

https://www.reuters.com/article/world/f ... icy%20bill

[vmb69]

FeelD was recommended by our kink therapist. So far really good

[Myhusbandsaysgoforit]

I would like to get verified but I don’t know what to ask or how to ask it. Rather, I would like to read and think about things. Some of it is scary.

Very new to this, I created a profile on Ashley Madison 2 nights ago with my husband, put one uncropped face shot on my profile, along with some basic stats. Within 2 days I’ve had about 70 responses, text/chatted with 5 that seem great, and have four intro first dates lined up this week.

Looking for any advice or recommendations from experienced women on best ways to stay safe - all dates are in public places downtown, 3 are lunch, on is drinks at an upscale speakeasy.

My husband says there’s a women’s only forum, I would like to get verified and move this conversation there once I’m approved.

Thanks!

Hello, nice to meet you, please do get verified and come join us. The safest way we do it is meet them for lunch or drinks, get to know them for a couple of hours and then hubby and I decide if we wanna go further. We both have to like him. And the second time we meet for sex. We meet at a hotel with a bar, I then go upstairs to get ready. I text for my lover to come up and we spend an hour alone and then I text hubby to join us. And if all goes well after that I can meet my lover whenever or wherever without hubby the next time. Good luck!

[ncnj1]

I've been on AM. I like married men. I don't judge them. Some are greedy aholes, but many are men in sexless marriages but they want to honor the life commitment they made and not leave their spouse who they still love. I chat, then talk/video, with the men from any app before a meeting. I have accepted money when I was fulfilling my escort/prostitute fantasy, but I usually don't.

One other question - my wife’s account got reinstated, and within 3 days she’s flooded with responses to the point that it’s hard to focus on any of them. If she tries to temporarily make her profile invisible, it becomes invisible for the men she’s currently communicating with as well as new connections.

How do you manage the endless stream of new connections?

[BrunetteLover]

Sounds like your wife ENJOYS the sex act and is comfortable (doesn't give AF) with the labels attached to that work. My guess is she sees it as fun, a challenge, a game. That is why she puts her men at ease.

I've been on AM. I like married men. I don't judge them. Some are greedy aholes, but many are men in sexless marriages but they want to honor the life commitment they made and not leave their spouse who they still love. I chat, then talk/video, with the men from any app before a meeting. I have accepted money when I was fulfilling my escort/prostitute fantasy, but I usually don't.

My wife prefers to meet with men who are either married or recently divorced. She does not like being with men who have been single for too long.

Many guys have told her of the 'sexless marriage' situation and she actually has a certain respect for their ability to honor their commitments, especially on behalf of the children.

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

My wife prefers to meet with men who are either married or recently divorced. She does not like being with men who have been single for too long.

Many guys have told her of the 'sexless marriage' situation and she actually has a certain respect for their ability to honor their commitments, especially on behalf of the children.

100% yes. There are more of these situation than we can imagine. I talk to vanilla wives who do not have sex with their husbands for many reasons, some legitimate like physical/medical issues, and some I think are just pure naggy bitchy wife BS. Those men deserve an understanding hotwife to help them out

[Wisher]

Hi all, I’m Myhusbandsaysgoforit’s husband.



When we first created her account she went through the verification process which uses Persona, a 3rd party verification system. It had her take pictures of her face and pictures of her photo ID using their app. She had to do it in my phone because there’s a known issue using any 3rd party camera app on the iPhone 14pro.

This place asks for that? Holy Crap, NEVER do that, EVER.

[BrunetteLover]

My wife prefers to meet with men who are either married or recently divorced. She does not like being with men who have been single for too long.

Many guys have told her of the 'sexless marriage' situation and she actually has a certain respect for their ability to honor their commitments, especially on behalf of the children.

100% yes. There are more of these situation than we can imagine. I talk to vanilla wives who do not have sex with their husbands for many reasons, some legitimate like physical/medical issues, and some I think are just pure naggy bitchy wife BS. Those men deserve an understanding hotwife to help them out

But in her experience, the sex is usually not that great with men who are technically cheating. Divorced or separated, maybe, but men who are stepping out on their wives usually hold back for some reason.

One of her best experiences was with a younger, single man who she did not reject outright due to his age, she saw something in his notes to her that she was intrigued by. They ended up having a wild encounter which took over three hours of non-stop sex, she came multiple times, and he ejaculated into and on her numerous times.

"We kept fucking and we both kept cumming. Over and over again. I lost track of time."

She never saw him again, I know she would like to.

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

My wife prefers to meet with men who are either married or recently divorced. She does not like being with men who have been single for too long.

Many guys have told her of the 'sexless marriage' situation and she actually has a certain respect for their ability to honor their commitments, especially on behalf of the children.

100% yes. There are more of these situation than we can imagine. I talk to vanilla wives who do not have sex with their husbands for many reasons, some legitimate like physical/medical issues, and some I think are just pure naggy bitchy wife BS. Those men deserve an understanding hotwife to help them out

But in her experience, the sex is usually not that great with men who are technically cheating. Divorced or separated, maybe, but men who are stepping out on their wives usually hold back for some reason.

One of her best experiences was with a younger, single man who she did not reject outright due to his age, she saw something in his notes to her that she was intrigued by. They ended up having a wild encounter which took over three hours of non-stop sex, she came multiple times, and he ejaculated into and on her numerous times.

"We kept fucking and we both kept cumming. Over and over again. I lost track of time."

She never saw him again, I know she would like to.

Sometimes that is the case. That is why a good intro message from a man is SOO important, and usually determines if I even respond.

[ncnj1]

Hi all, I’m Myhusbandsaysgoforit’s husband.



When we first created her account she went through the verification process which uses Persona, a 3rd party verification system. It had her take pictures of her face and pictures of her photo ID using their app. She had to do it in my phone because there’s a known issue using any 3rd party camera app on the iPhone 14pro.

This place asks for that? Holy Crap, NEVER do that, EVER.

Wisher- Everyone on AM has to do it, not sure how she could be on the app if she didn’t. So far it’s the only app she’s comfortable using and she’s got some great candidates.

[D+D]

My wife is on AM. When she started this lifestyle she used AFF. Got tons of of responses and went on a lot of dates. Your beginning plan works well. Pick those that appeal to you in bio and pics and respond. Get acquainted by chat. The ones that seem like you have the most in common and interest in take the chat deeper. When SHE’S ready to meet do it in a public place during daylight hours. My wife always tried to get a verification of their identity by seeing drivers licsense. If they are serious, really interested, and who they say, they won’t mind. She always kept me posted. When she did her first meets she sent the hotel name, room number, and a pic of his car license plate if possible. We didn’t get into website background checks. Some of the guys resulted in years long affairs, some one night stands. She’s been with over 60 men in the eleven years of hotwifing with no times that had a fear for her safety. She’s had some fuss, but that’s just life.

[ncnj1]

My wife is on AM. When she started this lifestyle she used AFF. Got tons of of responses and went on a lot of dates. Your beginning plan works well. Pick those that appeal to you in bio and pics and respond. Get acquainted by chat. The ones that seem like you have the most in common and interest in take the chat deeper. When SHE’S ready to meet do it in a public place during daylight hours. My wife always tried to get a verification of their identity by seeing drivers licsense. If they are serious, really interested, and who they say, they won’t mind. She always kept me posted. When she did her first meets she sent the hotel name, room number, and a pic of his car license plate if possible. We didn’t get into website background checks. Some of the guys resulted in years long affairs, some one night stands. She’s been with over 60 men in the eleven years of hotwifing with no times that had a fear for her safety. She’s had some fuss, but that’s just life.

Thanks D+D, that sounds like a reasonable approach. My wife doesn’t want me tagging along for a meet/great but sticks to daytime downtown meet ups (with one funny exception where they met in a park and she asked me to stay in the park but out of her sight. I had quite a challenge tracking her on “find my” to avoid running into them.

I think getting a photo of an ID after the first meet/greet and a license plate number (if applicable) makes sense.

[BrunetteLover]

I had quite a challenge tracking her on “find my” to avoid running into them.

I think getting a photo of an ID after the first meet/greet and a license plate number (if applicable) makes sense.

I purchased Findmy tags for my luggage for a recent flight. Could not get them to work with my phone or my wife's phone.