It might actually happen after years of telling me no.

[trecital]

One rule we operate with is that humiliation talk is acceptable in the bedroom (subject to certain limits). Think of it as 'play acting', or 'role play'.
But, the second part of the rule is that outside of the bedroom (basically, when the sex stops) normal civil behaviour returns, and he acts as a guest in your house, and you treat him like one.
This allows for you to get any humiliation 'fix' that you want, but without you losing respect.
That way everybody can have some fun, and nobody feels hurt.
Just remind him that ultimately it's your rules, or no playing.
If he's got half a brain he'll be happy with that setup.

Have fun, but stay in control.

[w770]

Exciting day, a "first" so perhaps if you do have the time, it will be cathartic and also productive to continue posting as you are able. Then you will have a record of the anticipation, the feelings, etc. that you may refer back to in the future, to relive it in a more realistic way.

Let's remember that at least half of the fun of all thing sexual (browsing the girlie magazine collection in our youth, trying to decide which video to rent, scanning the porn site, etc.) is in the anticipation. So if you can also capture that, you have captured half of the experience on the record.

And it will help you to cope and to keep yourself in check.

It worked for me in my time of need, while SW was playing.

That's a really good point, that not only will it help get my through the angst but also serve as a record should I ever want to relive it. I think whether or not I post in real time will depend a lot of how consumed I am in the moment.

Don’t overthink it. The more you focus on if it will be humiliating, the more humiliating it will be. Consider the fact that you are the one who offered your wife the gift of an extramarital sexual partner. It takes a lot of confidence in yourself, your wife, and your marriage to do that. Not every husband would do that. So, hold your head high and enjoy her pleasure. Own it and enjoy it as a spice to your marriage rather than a threat to your manhood.

Trying to script sex rarely works. It occurs in the moment. Forget labels except for loving and supportive husband, loving and supportive wife, and temporary fuck buddy. Those are all that matters. I seriously doubt she would move in with him because he has a bigger cock. He doesn’t sound like the type who can give her what you give her on a daily basis.

Have fun tonight because sex is fun regardless of who’s doing what to whom.

This is incredibly helpful and encouraging, thank you. It was actually the first thing I read after my run and cold plunge into the ocean. And I'm not sure if it's the effect of the cold or the runner's high, but your advice really hit home for me, especially the part about him not being able to give her what I do on a daily basis. It kinda took the stress of whatever I was feeling away., so thank you again.

Good luck today. It would be more worrisome if you didn’t have nerves at this moment. You and your wife sound like planners who like the structure and predictability of the events in your life. But as stated by others this is something you cannot micromanage. That will lead to disaster.

At some point you are going to have to let go and let this session tonight play out. It is wise that you and Lana have some guidelines tonight and some type of idea of how you WANT the night to go.

However once things start rolling you know that all that could go out the window. You can view this as a positive or negative. I would suggest you realize that once she starts, Lana will be thinking with her lizard brain and her pussy. She’s going to want to have that cock every way she can for as long as she can. In the moment, if how you describe it is accurate, you won’t be front and center in her mind, his cock will be. She’s going to want it so bad that she won’t be able to walk right for a week.

And Shawn, you know he’s going to be trying to pound her through the mattress. To get her to admit over and over that he’s the best and how much she loves his cock over yours. He will be trying to ruin that pussy.

Just go with it. Live in the moment, the sights, the sounds, the smells. Experience your emotions and feelings. Enjoy the moment of your wife getting something that she really wants and enjoys. Much like when you see her enjoying a fine dinner or movie, or some other thing she really likes to do.
If it gets to be too much, go walk the dogs. Freaking out, interrupting them, will make things worse not better. In fact you might want to poke your head in and egg him on, such as
“Is that the best you’ve got?”
“I thought you fucked her a lot harder than that.”
“I love the sound of your balls slapping against her ass, or clit” depending on what position they are in.
“Can you imagine what your friends would be saying right now if they could see you fucking her like this.”
“Own that pussy Shawn!”
and
“I bet you can’t wait to get your big cock in her during your party next week. Where will you fuck her Shawn, in the bathroom, in your bedroom, or somewhere else? Maybe you’ll MAKE her give you a blowjob during the party and come all over her face.”

Maybe for your wife:
“Take it all baby!”
“Take him balls deep for me.”
“Is that all you can get in your mouth, I thought you could get more in then that!”
“I love the way your ass looks when he’s doing you doggie honey. Your asshole looks so inviting.” Doesn’t her ass look so hot Shawn? So inviting.”

Perhaps by doing something like this you can regain some measure of control in their fucking.

Hopefully you can enjoy the moment and control your nerves and angst.

And most importantly, HAVE FUN!!!

You've definitely got us correctly pegged as planners. This has been the most spontaneous thing we've ever done even though we've been planning and scripting it as much as we've been able to control. The loss of control is both terrifying and exhilarating, much like what I would think skydiving is like.

I've been wondering if his humiliating dirty talk about me will change given that I'm listening in. Lana has told him that it's okay just as long as he doesn't go too far - how he chooses to interpret that will be left for us to see.

Not sure I'll be able to egg them on like you're suggesting as I've been pretty frozen in my tracks the times I've listened in on them so far but if Lana and I progress in this experience, I might get to the point where I'm an active verbal participant.

Thank you for the reminder to live in the moment. I think I'm normalizing the angst right now with the knowledge that there won't be a relative calm until maybe 12 hours from now.

Slight Update: Superman is at breakfast with some friends and he's told all of them about our plans for tonight. Basically all of them will be at the party next week.

Talk to SM and tell him that what is going between all of you is something Special, and that it's being done to increase Your Wife's Pleasure and it will Not be at the Expense of Your marriage to her. That He is a gift to Her , from You and that He needs to treat her as a gift, and also treat You with respect.

Also tell him that it's supposed to be Fun for All of You, and that He is Very Lucky that You Both are allowing Your Wife to be "Shared" with him.
Have Fun and Enjoy it as You see fit. If being there watching part of the time, all of the time or just listening, whatever you choose will be fine.

I've been trying to give my wife the opportunity to do just what you guys are doing, and it's been (years) a long and slow process, with her doing some playing a few times with a Friend, with me present and encouraging it.

I hope to watch her in the future, finally allowing another man, or men, to bang her good.

Best Wishes for a Hot and Special night tonight, may your wishes and her's come True, just the way you want them to.

If things go Very Well tonight, have your Wife dressing in some sexy undies, laying under your Christmas tree, on Christmas morning, gift tagged for SM for one under-tree banging. Then sit back with some hot chocolate and watch them go at it...
...then You do her under the tree next.

Lana will go over the rules with him beforehand again but I think my overall interaction with him will be rather limited. Although I do like your idea, so I might bring all these things up after today at some point.

Lana and I have plans to take tomorrow to reassess our feelings about tonight and see if and how we go forward. But until tonight, we're keeping it as normal as possible. We just finished cleaning the house. Lunch soon and then some Christmas shopping. I still can't believe this is about to happen.

[kaskap79]

You should be in my time zone, then the waiting time would be over.
And I do not have to wait until tomorrow morning to read about what happened.

[hiki]

Slight Update: Superman is at breakfast with some friends and he's told all of them about our plans for tonight. Basically all of them will be at the party next week.

I thought you/Lana had asked him to not tell his friends that you are in the know? This is going to change the dynamic at the party on Friday.

I hope tonight goes well for all of you!

[Wifesharing]

One rule we operate with is that humiliation talk is acceptable in the bedroom (subject to certain limits). Think of it as 'play acting', or 'role play'.
But, the second part of the rule is that outside of the bedroom (basically, when the sex stops) normal civil behaviour returns, and he acts as a guest in your house, and you treat him like one.
This allows for you to get any humiliation 'fix' that you want, but without you losing respect.
That way everybody can have some fun, and nobody feels hurt.
Just remind him that ultimately it's your rules, or no playing.
If he's got half a brain he'll be happy with that setup.

Have fun, but stay in control.

We never had this rule but this is how it plays out we have met guys that really get what is hot in the moment but after just hanging out there is no signs of that stuff

[w770]

One rule we operate with is that humiliation talk is acceptable in the bedroom (subject to certain limits). Think of it as 'play acting', or 'role play'.
But, the second part of the rule is that outside of the bedroom (basically, when the sex stops) normal civil behaviour returns, and he acts as a guest in your house, and you treat him like one.
This allows for you to get any humiliation 'fix' that you want, but without you losing respect.
That way everybody can have some fun, and nobody feels hurt.
Just remind him that ultimately it's your rules, or no playing.
If he's got half a brain he'll be happy with that setup.

Have fun, but stay in control.

This is how it's been for Lana and I since I've told her about my fantasy. She would say the dirtiest things in bed but right after bedroom time was done, she would go back to being my sweet angel. Her ability to switch back and forth so seamlessly has always impressed me.

You should be in my time zone, then the waiting time would be over.
And I do not have to wait until tomorrow morning to read about what happened.

Believe me, the wait is killing me, as much as I'm trying to keep things normal. It's a strange mix of dread and excitement that I've grown accustomed to.

Slight Update: Superman is at breakfast with some friends and he's told all of them about our plans for tonight. Basically all of them will be at the party next week.

I thought you/Lana had asked him to not tell his friends that you are in the know? This is going to change the dynamic at the party on Friday.

I hope tonight goes well for all of you!

I've compartmentalized the party lol. I can only handle one thing at a time with this whole experience and if I start fixating on being in a room where literally everyone knows, I think I might seriously have a full blown panic attack.

[hiki]

How is Lana handling the anticipation and waiting?
Are you planning on using the 2nd phone in the room again so you can listen/record the audio?
Have you listened to the recording from the first time Shawn was in your marital bed?
An idea to think about would be using Facetime from a phone propped up on the nightstand so you can watch the event from another room. You could even record it for enjoying it later when this is all past and Shawn has returned to California.

[Open2it]

Perhaps another way of looking at it is that a lot of people have had extramarital affairs. Some times it’s the spouse that finds out last. There are gossips who will always get there jollies from talking about who’s screwing who - while many of them secretly wish they could experience what they’re judging others for. Who knows at a party is immaterial as long as no one treats you unkindly. Being a cuckold or hotwife husband is a sign of strength, love and commitment, not weakness.

You chose together to explore a sexual lifestyle that many aren’t equipped to handle. If you’re strong enough to do that, you need to be strong enough to not care what strangers think of your choices. Take your cues from your wife and your own excitement not some grade B porn plot where the cuck is helpless and looked down upon.

There’s no doubt Lana will respond to him sexually in ways she may never had responded to you. A large part of that is the newness of the forbidden fruit. That doesn’t mean she loves you less. If anything, part of her enjoyment will be the fact that you are enjoying it with her.

I would recommend not over indulging in alcohol tonight. You want to be mellow and happy not looking to take offense if someone says the wrong thing.

[MonaLisaOverdrive]

Don’t overthink it. The more you focus on if it will be humiliating, the more humiliating it will be. Consider the fact that you are the one who offered your wife the gift of an extramarital sexual partner. It takes a lot of confidence in yourself, your wife, and your marriage to do that. Not every husband would do that. So, hold your head high and enjoy her pleasure. Own it and enjoy it as a spice to your marriage rather than a threat to your manhood.

Trying to script sex rarely works. It occurs in the moment. Forget labels except for loving and supportive husband, loving and supportive wife, and temporary fuck buddy. Those are all that matters. I seriously doubt she would move in with him because he has a bigger cock. He doesn’t sound like the type who can give her what you give her on a daily basis.

Have fun tonight because sex is fun regardless of who’s doing what to whom.

This is probably the single best piece of advice I've read on this forum so far.

[Topnotch]

do not over think it, just let it happen and roll with it

[w770]

How is Lana handling the anticipation and waiting?
Are you planning on using the 2nd phone in the room again so you can listen/record the audio?
Have you listened to the recording from the first time Shawn was in your marital bed?
An idea to think about would be using Facetime from a phone propped up on the nightstand so you can watch the event from another room. You could even record it for enjoying it later when this is all past and Shawn has returned to California.

She's more excited than anything but a lot of her energy is going towards being reassuring towards me telling me that we can stop at any point, even 5 min before Shawn is supposed to come over. She's made clear that nothing will ever make her see me as "less than" and has been incredibly physical with me today - hugs, hand holding, hands through my hair etc.

I haven't even thought of having a recording although maybe I should. But I anticipate that there will be several opportunities to record them in the next few weeks so no point in rushing it I suppose.

Don’t overthink it. The more you focus on if it will be humiliating, the more humiliating it will be. Consider the fact that you are the one who offered your wife the gift of an extramarital sexual partner. It takes a lot of confidence in yourself, your wife, and your marriage to do that. Not every husband would do that. So, hold your head high and enjoy her pleasure. Own it and enjoy it as a spice to your marriage rather than a threat to your manhood.

Trying to script sex rarely works. It occurs in the moment. Forget labels except for loving and supportive husband, loving and supportive wife, and temporary fuck buddy. Those are all that matters. I seriously doubt she would move in with him because he has a bigger cock. He doesn’t sound like the type who can give her what you give her on a daily basis.

Have fun tonight because sex is fun regardless of who’s doing what to whom.

This is probably the single best piece of advice I've read on this forum so far.

It really was.

do not over think it, just let it happen and roll with it

We're about 5 hours away. I think the plan is for me to walk the dogs as he arrives just to avoid having to talk to him, but it also plays in a bit to the cheating angle.

[mundyman]

Some more arrows for your quiver in case he gets out of line:

All that time in the gym and all those steroids and you can't fuck her any better than that? Jesus, dude.

She's had big dick before you and she'll have big dick after you.

You are one injury away from being a has-been

Enjoy this while it lasts. But gather your nuts wisely, little squirrel. Winter's coming.

After New Year's we are going to start auditioning some new designated hitters. Know anybody?

God gave you a real gift with that cock, boy. Better hope He never takes it back.

I've known all along. We're doing this for her. You didn't get her to cheat, boy. We're using you. One day soon we'll throw you away.

You are just an accessory-like a new purse.

That was fun. Now go home and sleep alone in your parents house.

How much did you pay for that Viagra anyway?

Dionysus would weep. (head shake)

For Lana:

You're going to get fucked tonight, girl.

Ready for that dick?

Pussy getting wet?

You going to swallow me after?

You need to be ready, dude. Don't let him totally dominate you.

Good stuff!!

LOL!!

[FadermanL20]

Some more arrows for your quiver in case he gets out of line:

All that time in the gym and all those steroids and you can't fuck her any better than that? Jesus, dude.

She's had big dick before you and she'll have big dick after you.

You are one injury away from being a has-been

Enjoy this while it lasts. But gather your nuts wisely, little squirrel. Winter's coming.

After New Year's we are going to start auditioning some new designated hitters. Know anybody?

God gave you a real gift with that cock, boy. Better hope He never takes it back.

I've known all along. We're doing this for her. You didn't get her to cheat, boy. We're using you. One day soon we'll throw you away.

You are just an accessory-like a new purse.

That was fun. Now go home and sleep alone in your parents house.

How much did you pay for that Viagra anyway?

Dionysus would weep. (head shake)

For Lana:

You're going to get fucked tonight, girl.

Ready for that dick?

Pussy getting wet?

You going to swallow me after?

You need to be ready, dude. Don't let him totally dominate you.

Good stuff!!

LOL!!

Dude yours were better. I was at work when I saw your post and decided to riff along with it. I was building off your idea!

I was really nervous about the wrong people seeing me do it, but luckily hardly anyone was there that early.

I just don't want to see him wrecked by this guy. 770 has the upper hand, he needs to use it if this guy doesn't want to show respect.

770, We are all hoping for the best for you two and are eagerly looking forward to your impressions. This is your (and Lana's) night, it's all because of you. Have the time of your life!

[hiki]

So is the plan that he arrives while you are walking the dogs? And you will return while they've already gotten busy in the bedroom? Will they leave the bedroom door open so that you can decide if you want to walk in on them or just watch / listen from the door?

[gulfcpl]

I don’t understand your avoiding talking to him. There’s no reason you all can’t be friendly until it’s time for her and him to get together.

[kaskap79]

I don’t understand your avoiding talking to him. There’s no reason you all can’t be friendly until it’s time for her and him to get together.

I think it is the knowledge about what Superman will do in a few minutes which can make you uncomfortable the first time after he knows that you know what will happen when you close the door.

[leggysman]

I think you should just try and be bros with him. You have something in common.

It's kinda fun to shake a guy's hand and slap him on the back after he's just finished fucking your wife.

Like, "nice work dude"

[w770]

Some more arrows for your quiver in case he gets out of line:

All that time in the gym and all those steroids and you can't fuck her any better than that? Jesus, dude.

She's had big dick before you and she'll have big dick after you.

You are one injury away from being a has-been

Enjoy this while it lasts. But gather your nuts wisely, little squirrel. Winter's coming.

After New Year's we are going to start auditioning some new designated hitters. Know anybody?

God gave you a real gift with that cock, boy. Better hope He never takes it back.

I've known all along. We're doing this for her. You didn't get her to cheat, boy. We're using you. One day soon we'll throw you away.

You are just an accessory-like a new purse.

That was fun. Now go home and sleep alone in your parents house.

How much did you pay for that Viagra anyway?

Dionysus would weep. (head shake)

For Lana:

You're going to get fucked tonight, girl.

Ready for that dick?

Pussy getting wet?

You going to swallow me after?

You need to be ready, dude. Don't let him totally dominate you.

Good stuff!!

LOL!!

Dude yours were better. I was at work when I saw your post and decided to riff along with it. I was building off your idea!

I was really nervous about the wrong people seeing me do it, but luckily hardly anyone was there that early.

I just don't want to see him wrecked by this guy. 770 has the upper hand, he needs to use it if this guy doesn't want to show respect.

770, We are all hoping for the best for you two and are eagerly looking forward to your impressions. This is your (and Lana's) night, it's all because of you. Have the time of your life!

Thank you! Lana's really impressed upon him the fact that there's a distinction between humiliation and disrespect, so hopefully he can keep that in mind.

So is the plan that he arrives while you are walking the dogs? And you will return while they've already gotten busy in the bedroom? Will they leave the bedroom door open so that you can decide if you want to walk in on them or just watch / listen from the door?

Right. I'll be taking the dogs out around 1945(745pm) and he's scheduled to be here around 2000(8pm). The bedroom door is to be left slightly open and by the time I'm back, they'll likely already be in our bed.

I don’t understand your avoiding talking to him. There’s no reason you all can’t be friendly until it’s time for her and him to get together.

I think it is the knowledge about what Superman will do in a few minutes which can make you uncomfortable the first time after he knows that you know what will happen when you close the door.

This is mostly right. People that know me tend to describe me as a very funny, social, and a great communicator. I wasn't always like this and it's something that really came about from my profession - which forces me to be convincing and engaging conversationally. I'm rarely intimidated by another man, but in a bit of an embarrassing admission, Superman does bring about that feeling in me. So I feel that if I were there, my uneasiness might make for an awkward and perhaps uncomfortable setting, which I don't want to trickle down into their time together.

I think you should just try and be bros with him. You have something in common.

It's kinda fun to shake a guy's hand and slap him on the back after he's just finished fucking your wife.

Like, "nice work dude"

Lol, I don't see that happening to be honest. Although we do have a surprising amount in common in terms of diet and exercise, but I just don't think it's in the cards for us to be bros.

We just arrived home after doing some Christmas shopping. I'm wrapping up some gifts while she's in the shower. I really love her and as we hugged earlier before she went in the shower, she squeezed me extra tight telling me, "you know I'm always yours, right? No matter what."

[Long Lurker 34]

Some more arrows for your quiver in case he gets out of line:

All that time in the gym and all those steroids and you can't fuck her any better than that? Jesus, dude.

She's had big dick before you and she'll have big dick after you.

You are one injury away from being a has-been

Enjoy this while it lasts. But gather your nuts wisely, little squirrel. Winter's coming.

After New Year's we are going to start auditioning some new designated hitters. Know anybody?

God gave you a real gift with that cock, boy. Better hope He never takes it back.

I've known all along. We're doing this for her. You didn't get her to cheat, boy. We're using you. One day soon we'll throw you away.

You are just an accessory-like a new purse.

That was fun. Now go home and sleep alone in your parents house.

How much did you pay for that Viagra anyway?

Dionysus would weep. (head shake)

For Lana:

You're going to get fucked tonight, girl.

Ready for that dick?

Pussy getting wet?

You going to swallow me after?

You need to be ready, dude. Don't let him totally dominate you.

Good stuff!!

LOL!!

Dude yours were better. I was at work when I saw your post and decided to riff along with it. I was building off your idea!

I was really nervous about the wrong people seeing me do it, but luckily hardly anyone was there that early.

I just don't want to see him wrecked by this guy. 770 has the upper hand, he needs to use it if this guy doesn't want to show respect.

770, We are all hoping for the best for you two and are eagerly looking forward to your impressions. This is your (and Lana's) night, it's all because of you. Have the time of your life!

FL20 - Small adder to your list.
"Honey your human dildo has arrived!"

[johnstevens555]

Have her leave the door open enough that you can take a discreetly take a peek (should the desire overwhelm you) without further opening it.

[isinlarsa]

I think a lot of us husbands are almost as excited as you about what is going to happen in the next few hours. Hope you remember every little detail and write about it soon while it's still fresh in your mind.

[w770]

Have her leave the door open enough that you can take a discreetly take a peek (should the desire overwhelm you) without further opening it.

Yep that's the plan.

I think a lot of us husbands are almost as excited as you about what is going to happen in the next few hours. Hope you remember every little detail and write about it soon while it's still fresh in your mind.

If it's not too overwhelming, I'll try and real time post while I'm on the couch and then a full breakdown of everything tomorrow.

Slight Update : impromptu visit from Lana's parents. They should be here for just an hour or so but this is pretty funny having to have our family friendly faces on for the time being.

[johnstevens555]

Slight Update : impromptu visit from Lana's parents. They should be here for just an hour or so but this is pretty funny having to have our family friendly faces on for the time being.

You truly couldnt make this shit up. Let us know how that goes please.

[johnstevens555]

Wait, did they call first? OMFG

[w770]

Slight Update : impromptu visit from Lana's parents. They should be here for just an hour or so but this is pretty funny having to have our family friendly faces on for the time being.

You truly couldnt make this shit up. Let us know how that goes please.

They have this tendency to call and let us know as they're already on their way. Lana says they won't be more than an hour though. They just got here so let's see how this goes.