intro and going deeper into situation

[realcucklife]

Looking forward to your next update.

[Jeremie11231]

Re: using edging and orgasm to grease the wheels past new boundaries.

So, from the very beginning - that first one-off dive into a cuckolding thing, Emily has really got off on observing me get aroused by these things – especially when it’s her doing the talking. Maybe it’s the feeling of power – to be able to say things and watch me respond, immediately. Especially when the things she is saying are about doing things she never previously imagined having the freedom and independence to do, things married women aren’t ‘supposed’ to be able to do. And especially when my response is totally involuntary. I can think or say one thing, and my penis says its own thing, without getting permission from all the other parts of me.

Emily knows exactly the things to say to wrap me around her finger and be totally under her control. She will remind me that my “cute little penis cannot lie” to her and make me pull my pants or underwear down for her to see as I lie there. She’ll sit cross-legged next to me on the bed and look back and forth between my face and my penis as she speaks to me.


Emily will lube up my penis and her hand and then starts touching me. She’ll just hold her hand in place around it, like an o-ring. She holds her hand still and let’s me push my penis up through it using my hips. She won’t let me hide behind telling myself it’s something she’s doing to me. She makes me do it to myself – makes me jump up and down like that for her, to show her I want it. She’ll tease me saying things like “you just can’t help it, can you?”

And she’ll tell me how it feels to have his cock in her, and about the things she does for him, like she’s testing me out and watching my reactions. That’s how she first told me she had been licking his ass when she gave him blowjobs. She’ll tease me about how she was going to watch me cum while I think about her having sex with him, or tell me what image to visualize in my mind as I begin to orgasm. She will tell me I can never go back to not being a cuckold, and how well I've done accepting everything. Right as I'm cumming she'll tell me what a 'good boy' I am.

We started calling these “cuckold training” and “acceptance training” sessions. We’d talk about how it made her feel safer and secure in having sex with Josh to know that I was fully supportive of her. (I’ll write more about that later.) During these sessions I would feel so under Emily’s spell, and it felt so intimate it’s hard to describe – but so intimate it felt like sex even though we weren’t actually having intercourse.

It was during a session like that when I came out and told her I wanted her to lock my penis in a cage next time Josh came over. She seemed amused that I would be the one asking for something like that. But she agreed, mentioning that Josh would probably like to hear about that. I asked why she thought he would like that and she said he had always seemed to like it when she mentioned to him that I had not been allowed to fuck her or cum for days before he came over.

For a long time it was not very clear to me whether he really cared about the fact he was making a cuck out of me, or if he just tolerated the fact that I was usually at home when he came over. I knew from things Emily shared that he did seem to like knowing that her experience with him was totally different than she could have with me.

Then it came out from talking with Emily that Josh had told her I was the most accepting and welcoming husband of any married woman he had sex with (not sure how many of those there even were in his experience - maybe a couple of others?). He told her he was periodically seeing a married woman who was ethically non-monogamous, but her husband wasn’t handling it well and started trying to put limits and rules on her dates with him. He said things to Emily that made it clear he was pleased that I was putting up no resistance to him coming over and taking her into the bedroom.

Emily, wanting very eagerly to please Josh in all possible ways possible, didn’t need convincing to be able to offer Josh more things to demonstrate that she saw him as the dominant man in her sex life and that her husband was well-managed and would not be a obstacle to him. Since Josh had just recently been telling her about the awkward drama caused by this other husband reacting poorly and interfering with Josh’s visits with this other woman, Emily happily boasted to him that I was going to start having a chastity cage on whenever he came over. I could sense that she felt proud to be able to show him that she wouldn’t be like the other woman who had to hold back engaging with him because of her husband – that she would not allow any such interference and that her husband understood who made those decisions.

Talking with Emily (including during our “training” sessions) about her conversations with Josh and the things he said to her in bed, I developed a sense of how he saw things, and I filled in the blanks with my imagination:
He loved being a really hung guy. He didn’t suffer any anxiety about his ability to give a woman an intense sexual experience – his main concern was about really warming her up and getting her relaxed so she was comfortable – making her feel safe, trusting, and adored as a beautiful woman, and helping her let go of any inhibitions. Then he could take her to cloud nine by making her feel more deeply filled up than ever. He’d done it plenty of times before and would see it plenty of times again, and he loved giving that to a woman.
He wasn’t worried about how he compared to me – he just knew. It was obvious. But he did enjoy the fact that Emily was clearly experiencing things with him that she never experienced with her husband. And he enjoyed knowing that the things she was doing for him were something different, too – the way she moved, the way she responded, the way she licked and sucked, the things she said to him while he fucked her.
He liked knowing that she wanted and needed him so much she was willing to restrict her husband’s access to her and even his orgasms.
He liked it when she gasped and responded to his girth by saying things about it. He liked that she saw him as this guy who was who wasn’t afraid to fuck her the way he did, knowing her husband could hear her going crazy on his cock.
He doesn’t have any disrespect for me or judge me – in fact, he appreciates my cooperation and my ability to accept him fucking Emily without making problems. He once said to her, “I could never be a cuck.” He understands I have a small cock and Emily has not been getting everything she needs, and he gives that to her – like it just makes sense, that’s life, and some guys just have to accept that it is what it is.. He likes that I have shown (non-verbally) that I accept this and seem to accept him as sexually dominant over me.

So, the next time Josh came over, about half an hour before he arrived, I put on the chastity cage, showed it to Emily, and gave her the key to keep in the bedroom with her while she was with Josh.

Will post more asap.

[stevens4fun]

Jeremie, it's nice to hear from someone who is actually experiencing the agony and ecstasy of being cuckolded. I was wondering how you'd broach the cage concept with Emily and you just shared that with us. Cages weren't around (to my knowledge) in the 1990s when my wife Linda found her "Josh" so she just reassured me that she loved me but that "it would be best if I wasn't inside her any more." We had quite a challenge fitting it all in with work and family - has it been a challenge for you as well?

[trecital]

Nicely told. I was wondering if you've had much direct interaction with Josh, or is it all through Emily?

"Emily will lube up my penis and her hand and then starts touching me. She’ll just hold her hand in place around it, like an o-ring. She holds her hand still and let’s me push my penis up through it using my hips. She won’t let me hide behind telling myself it’s something she’s doing to me. She makes me do it to myself – makes me jump up and down like that for her, to show her I want it. She’ll tease me saying things like “you just can’t help it, can you?”"

I liked this part, in particular. It's like what medical/sex researchers do, with a device that goes around your penis to measure your level of arousal and response to sexual stimulii. Emily is very clever!

[elina]

I love the way this is going.
Seems like the three of you are at this stage on the path to a truly satisfying relationship for all of you.

Can't wait for the next installment!!

Sincerely
elina

[Jeremie11231]

I love the way this is going.
Seems like the three of you are at this stage on the path to a truly satisfying relationship for all of you.
Can't wait for the next installment!!

Thanks, Elina! I hope we are!

Jeremie, it's nice to hear from someone who is actually experiencing the agony and ecstasy of being cuckolded. I was wondering how you'd broach the cage concept with Emily and you just shared that with us. Cages weren't around (to my knowledge) in the 1990s when my wife Linda found her "Josh" so she just reassured me that she loved me but that "it would be best if I wasn't inside her any more." We had quite a challenge fitting it all in with work and family - has it been a challenge for you as well?

Thanks - yes -- life is always there, and not always easy or sexy...
I'll talk more about the cage thing, but for us it has been a very limited thing -- mainly limited to short periods (1 day max) and while Josh is here. It definitely turns me on (and gives me angst) to think about much longer term use, but the practicalities of that are very complicated. So we've mostly relied on 'promise'-based restrictions, and it's not purely honor-system because of course it's obvious to Emily (in multiple ways) whether or not I have complied with restrictions or not. I think the maximum I've gone without release is about 5 weeks. Past 3 days I get into a different zone, past 1 week that just increases a lot, and past 2 weeks, from then on out, I'm like putty and whole body buzzing.

Also, we still have 'normal' sex - the frequency of that varies. It used to feel like this hard line for her to ever have sex more frequently with someone else than with me, but we crossed that line at some point... as always, depends on what's going on.

[Jeremie11231]

Nicely told. I was wondering if you've had much direct interaction with Josh, or is it all through Emily?

"Emily will lube up my penis and her hand and then starts touching me. She’ll just hold her hand in place around it, like an o-ring. She holds her hand still and let’s me push my penis up through it using my hips. She won’t let me hide behind telling myself it’s something she’s doing to me. She makes me do it to myself – makes me jump up and down like that for her, to show her I want it. She’ll tease me saying things like “you just can’t help it, can you?”"

I liked this part, in particular. It's like what medical/sex researchers do, with a device that goes around your penis to measure your level of arousal and response to sexual stimulii. Emily is very clever!

Thanks! (and thanks everyone for your comments and interest - makes it fun for me to share -- and glad you guys get it...)
To answer your question, Trecital: Yes - I do interact directly with Josh. Quite a bit. From the beginning, if I was home when he came over, I’d usually see him and say hi in the living room or kitchen. Sometimes they’d spend some time sitting in the dining room talking before moving to the bedroom. Often Emily would still be in the shower or something when he arrived, so I’d be the one to open the door and let him in. That was awkward in the beginning – I’d let him know Emily would be out in a minute, and offer him water or tea or something. Our interaction has increased over time and I’ll write more about that.

But it occurs to me at this point to share a particular a situation that came up when I was faced with interacting with Josh in a much bigger and more public way than ever before, and it was a big part of that process I’ve described earlier of Emily realizing she was in control of things and that we were no longer in the zone of playing with a hot fantasy, but her new social/sex life had become its own thing independent of that. It was a turning-point situation that I had never even thought about, and that forced a reckoning for me of the reality of things: when Emily’s birthday came around.

We decided to have a potluck party at our house and invite everyone we knew – her local family (cousins, an aunt), her girlfriends, a few close friends of mine. Just a few days before the party, we were talking about it and she casually mentioned that Josh would be there. I didn’t respond immediately because I was kind of shocked. I had that feeling of ‘should i be angry about this?’ And I wasn’t in the best mood that day. But I didn’t want to reveal any displeasure, didn’t want to seem jealous or anything. In my most neutral voice I said something like, “oh, you invited him?” And she said yes, of course she did. And she didn’t say anything like ‘is that okay?’ or ‘I hope that’s okay’ – it was clear from her tone that it just was okay. Instead, she mentioned a couple of girlfriends of hers being really curious to meet him. (That was another thing – by that time it had come up in chats with at least a couple of her friends, who seemed to be very approving of her seeing other men, and even inspired by it.) So, she had even talked to friends about inviting Josh to her birthday party before mentioning it to me. I felt very annoyed by that – even pissed. I also wasn’t sure how I’d feel with him there mingling with friends of mine. But I’d already invited my friends, so I didn’t have a choice at that point. And I knew there could be no uninviting Josh.

I did not say any of that – I just said something like “cool” or “okay” and changed the subject. She didn’t seem to register my “okay” – she wasn’t listening for it because she hadn’t been asking for my permission. But the really telling thing was that it was obvious it hadn’t even occurred to her to ask my permission. What did I even have to be pissed about? I had been accepting Josh coming over too many times to count at that point. They texted almost everyday, and he was genuinely a close friend in her life. Of course he was going to come to her birthday party. And of course he would do what he did every time he came over – take her into the bedroom and explore her insides. There was nothing left to ask permission about – it dawned on me that the only reason she *ever* still checked in with me about plans with Josh at that point in this whole thing was to make sure we didn’t have any conflicting plans. So when she just happened to mention to me Josh was coming to her party, she wasn’t trying to dominate me like that – she just was in charge. And in a way that didn’t need any explaining. I realized how much had changed. All those times Josh had come over and I had gone along with it without a peep – they had added up. I had literally nothing to complain about.

That night of the birthday party felt like a turning point in a few ways – her no-permission-needed stance taking hold, the openness with which she was embracing being a liberated woman and bringing that into her social sphere, and my interaction with Josh – I had never interacted with him as much as I did that night. Pissed or not pissed, awkward or not, when push came to shove and I was put in the actual situation, I sucked it up and confirmed everything about my role. I welcomed Josh, got him a drink, made sure he felt comfortable while Emily was busy with other guests. I talked to him, got to know him better, asking about life and work and all that. All with both of us knowing (but not saying anything about it) that later that night he would be taking her to our bedroom and making her birthday complete. While I cleaned up and washed dishes.

It was also the first time I had to stand there openly in a group of people who knew us, where several people there knew what was going on between Josh and Emily. I couldn’t pretend this was just some bedroom thing we did between us, playing with fantasies. I didn’t just like the idea of being cucked – I had become a cuck – I was a cuckold, in real life. Of course I had, long before that – but that night drove it in for real. Josh was standing there, totally at ease, and with nothing to prove. He was polite and friendly to me. He had no reason not to be. He already understood exactly how things were. It was me who was catching up, me who was slowly absorbing the new normal, and proving, with every passing moment of my docile acceptance, that it was exactly how it ought to be.

Will write more soon, picking up at the point where we decided to start using the chastity cage…

[athlete915]

I'm glad that you and Josh were able to spend some time together at the party. I know that it can be awkward for a new cuckold to interact with his wife's bull/lover at first, but it is so important to the health of both the wife/lover relationship and the marriage to break through that awkwardness. Ideally, as the husband gets to know her bull/lover, he'll find that they have things in common and actually like one another. If that happens, the husband will feel less threatened by him. He will stop seeing him as a competitor and more like someone who is adding to his marriage vice taking away from it. If he actually likes the bull/lover, it will stop feeling like he is just supporting his wife but also supporting the bull/lover and their relationship.

When I am with a couple, I make time to spend a little one-on-one time with the cuckolds. For example, I'll ask them to go grab beers and watch a game. Initially, we'll just talk about normal stuff and get to know each other. Eventually, I will start asking them about my relationship with their wife. How do they think things are going? Is she enjoying herself? What does she say about me? How is the husband enjoying things?

Ideally, I will also use that as an opportunity to give the husbands ideas on how they can be more supportive. For example, if I really liked the lingerie she had on last time, I will ask him to get her more. If we are planning a trip, I will ask him to start researching hotels or rentals. I'll tell him I love to have a cocktail ready for me when I come over. Cuckolds seem to love knowing how best to help and having concrete ways to play a supportive role.

A little time and effort spent developing good communication between the husbands and bulls/lovers can go a long way towards improving the overall relationship.

[BallSpanking]

I'll bet those dishes got spotless ... And the party room looked spic and span.
Could you hear Josh fucking Emily in your marital bed?

[elina]

.......................
We decided to have a potluck party at our house and invite everyone we knew – her local family (cousins, an aunt), her girlfriends, a few close friends of mine. Just a few days before the party, we were talking about it and she casually mentioned that Josh would be there. I didn’t respond immediately because I was kind of shocked. I had that feeling of ‘should i be angry about this?’ And I wasn’t in the best mood that day. But I didn’t want to reveal any displeasure, didn’t want to seem jealous or anything. In my most neutral voice I said something like, “oh, you invited him?” And she said yes, of course she did. And she didn’t say anything like ‘is that okay?’ or ‘I hope that’s okay’ – it was clear from her tone that it just was okay. Instead, she mentioned a couple of girlfriends of hers being really curious to meet him. (That was another thing – by that time it had come up in chats with at least a couple of her friends, who seemed to be very approving of her seeing other men, and even inspired by it.) So, she had even talked to friends about inviting Josh to her birthday party before mentioning it to me. I felt very annoyed by that – even pissed. I also wasn’t sure how I’d feel with him there mingling with friends of mine. But I’d already invited my friends, so I didn’t have a choice at that point. And I knew there could be no uninviting Josh.

I did not say any of that – I just said something like “cool” or “okay” and changed the subject. She didn’t seem to register my “okay” – she wasn’t listening for it because she hadn’t been asking for my permission. But the really telling thing was that it was obvious it hadn’t even occurred to her to ask my permission. What did I even have to be pissed about? I had been accepting Josh coming over too many times to count at that point. They texted almost everyday, and he was genuinely a close friend in her life. Of course he was going to come to her birthday party. And of course he would do what he did every time he came over – take her into the bedroom and explore her insides. There was nothing left to ask permission about – it dawned on me that the only reason she *ever* still checked in with me about plans with Josh at that point in this whole thing was to make sure we didn’t have any conflicting plans. So when she just happened to mention to me Josh was coming to her party, she wasn’t trying to dominate me like that – she just was in charge. And in a way that didn’t need any explaining. I realized how much had changed. All those times Josh had come over and I had gone along with it without a peep – they had added up. I had literally nothing to complain about.

Dear Jeremie

I just love this, thanks so much for sharing.

See the statement I highlighted; I think it is more natural to say that Emily at that point new and accepted that She is the dominant person in your relationship. She alone makes these decisions and informs you at Her will. And She is confident that you will accept that and not try to make a scene.

Keeping you chaste for up to 5 weeks is also a very Dominant Move. I know what that is like, I know how desperate a male becomes at that point and how willing he is to obey and serve the Lady he loves. And if Emily really, made you go that long; I am pretty confident She knew what She was doing and would be noticing exactly what the effects on you were from that. As you stated, She did not need a chasticy cage because She would immediately notice if you had disobeyed Her at that point.

Emily to me sounds like an absolutely fantastic Lady, I hope you realize how lucky you are to have found Her and how close to impossible it will be for you to find anyone similar if She ever leaves you. So keep loving Her and submitting to Her.

And please keep us posted.

Sincerely
elina

[OZCPL]

Did Josh stay the night at Emily's birthday party.
Were any guests still there when the lovers retired for the night.
Do you have any kids.
Would you object if Emily wanted to have Joshes baby.
Does Emily still tell you about the men she hooks up with when away on business.
When Emily and Josh stand side by side what do they look like, any pics of that, even from the rear.
Has Emerly ever face sat you, after a date with Josh.
What is the dynamic like between Emily and Josh as far as being, keeper of the key, for the cage when you are locked.
Anything to tell about 5 weeks in a cage and was it a forced 5 weeks.
What went down at the party.

I hope you survived your wife's naughty birthday party and have recovered.

[handye12]

Hi Jeremie
I love your introspection. I have had the same thoughts in my brief time being a cuckold with my Love & Queen, Sally. I have experienced some of the feelings you mention, but you address the angst so much better than I could ever put into words.
In particular, your first experiences with a chastity cage, and feeling a little disingenuous when you made the decision to wear the cage, instead of Emily being in charge, hits the nail dead centre. Now I don't have to explain it, instead just gently guide Sally's attention to your insightful experiences.
Thank you. I look forward to hearing more

[Jeremie11231]

Hey all - I'm going to post more soon -- just life happens, holidays, etc. But things keep moving, and so fast it's hard to keep up. Esp since I'm still trying to catch up here to the present time, so I can actually post about stuff more as it's happening.

@handye12 - Yes - all the more embarrassing when the cage is your own idea... but that's life in the topsy turvy world of "I want it / don't want it"...

@OZCPL - Josh didn't actually end up spending the night the night of the party - he had to go home (he came back a couple nights later), but he was one of the last to leave and in the end it was him chatting with a couple of my friends, who knew who he was and what that meant.
We do have kids - they know we have a lot of friends and are otherwise kept separate from the adult aspects of things.
Pregnancy - that's not really a topic for us / not something I fantasize about. And we'd be very opposed to having *any* more kids, period. : )
Emily has not hooked up with men on trips away - that would be great if she met someone - just hasn't happened.
re: face-sitting - not really - maybe something for the future
Re: key keeping - that's just Emily, when it happens. Will write more about that.
Re: 5 weeks - that was not with a cage (only do cage very short term) - that was just through discipline.

Will post another installment of my story soon...

[Jeremie11231]

oh, and also, to answer your question - Emily is tiny compared to Josh -- she is 5'1" and thin, he is about 6'3", fit and muscular.
(and I'm 6'0".)

[Des 31]

I read only your original post and think this will work out well for the two of you. It's a great life for those of us who enjoy other men fucking our wives.

She has learned the sex is better for her and most guys if I'm not in the same room at those times. At times she leaves the bedroom door ajar, I watch from our dark hallway and am masturbating madly. I haven't been noticed most of the time, and I think she's right. It really is better for both of them if they assume I'm not watching. The good part about that is that those of us who get those feelings now and then find the jealousy actually enhances the excitement for most. My mind goes to mush when that happens, but I like it.

How it all began is in our ongoing history at this website.

~ Des

[Jeremie11231]

Wow - some time has passed - holidays and all that life stuff. Lots of intense stuff over that time, too -- still trying to catch my story up to the present. Where I left off was when we were about to start experimenting with using a chastity cage --

So, the idea was that I would put on the cage before Josh arrived the next time he came over
so it would completely eliminate any chance of me spoiling my mindset by touching myself and cumming, by accident or not. That was the practical reason for the chastity device in the beginning. Combined with a playful intention of it being humbling. And what was immediately clear was that it had a huge psychological impact on me.

For one thing, it felt completely silly – like really embarrassing to think about. I thought, this isn’t me – I’m a guy who thinks it’s hot to imagine my wife with another guy, not someone into all these other things. But I had kind of done it to myself, by not being able to control myself and jerking off even when I said I wouldn’t, and by actually bringing it all up to Emily in the first place. Emily reminded me of that again and again. She even told Josh how I hadn’t been able to help myself from touching my little dick outside the door while he fucked her. I might feel ridiculous wearing this thing that felt like a toy prop, but I actually had been unable to control my masturbation – that was even more embarrassing.

And however silly the device might seem, one thing that felt very real and not so silly at all was that I really could not touch my penis. (Of course there are ways to get it off, but if you think about it, that would just be even more embarrassing, and not in a good way – to show that I was struggling so hard with controlling myself that I actually had to break the agreement and the device.)

There is no way to describe the feeling of being in a chastity device while hearing the sounds of Josh and Emily having sex. The feeling of my penis kept so small inside it, the butterflies I felt down there, but feeling no sensation on the skin – totally blocked by the plastic – while in my head were images to match the sounds I heard – images of Josh taking my place in the bedroom, his cock erect and free, feeling every sensation of Emily’s hands, her lips, her pussy.

Touching myself was my main way of dealing with that restless, nervous, jealous angst energy that I got when Emily was with Josh. It was my way of coping – how I attached pleasure to the jealousy I felt. Now I just had to feel it building in me. I just had to hear it, feel it, and let it be what it was, without doing anything. Sometimes I could feel this enormous tension just taking hold of my thighs and my butt and everywhere down there. I had to find other outlets to release energy, and I found myself feeling driven to clean the house. I started having experiences of washing all the dishes and cleaning the entire kitchen while hearing the sounds of sex coming from the bedroom. Emily of course picked up on the connection and that just made her all the more want to put me in chastity. Even knowing that, I continued to clean. It was like I didn’t know what to do with myself.

Doing housecleaning while getting cucked seems like a cartoon stereotype of something, and I knew that, but it’s just so weird – it was like this impulse that just arose and took over – I felt this motivation to do it. And the chastity cage just made me focus on it, because what else could I do with myself? I also felt this inexplicable impulse to demonstrate that I was in full acceptance and support of them being in the bedroom together. And Emily coming out later to see what I had done would send that message – that I was an extra good husband and was not protesting or pouting about being locked out of the bedroom so she could have sex.

Will keep writing more asap.

[trecital]

There is no way to describe the feeling of being in a chastity device while hearing the sounds of Josh and Emily having sex. The feeling of my penis kept so small inside it, the butterflies I felt down there, but feeling no sensation on the skin – totally blocked by the plastic – while in my head were images to match the sounds I heard – images of Josh taking my place in the bedroom, his cock erect and free, feeling every sensation of Emily’s hands, her lips, her pussy.

You say there is no way to describe the feeling......
But you did a pretty good job, I'd say!

Personally I would recommend a metal cage, and quite a large one too. People often recommend a small cage, so as to stop any erections. But I would say, find a cage that would allow you to get about three quarter erect, or thereabouts. Then your cock will continue to try to grow and push between the bars of a metal cage. That feeling of straining to get fully erect is an amazing one. Only then do you feel like you are really 'caged'.
Not recommended if you don't like the feelings of angst and sexual frustration.

[Jeremie11231]

Hi @trecital - yes, since then I have got a metal cage and I like that, too. Different feelings. The plastic feels more frustrating, because I really can't feel anything there (with the metal there are little gaps that tease, with clothes, etc). I actually dread the plastic more, but there is something about the total inaccessibility that doubles me down in the sense of commitment. All comes back to that thing again - "i want it / don't want it"...

[michael8401]

I feel you on the cage. I'd say make sure it's wide enough. I am more with the right fitting plastic cage though as metal you really need the right underwear so that you are holding it up. It's a lot heavier.

I have found when playing with cages - I have only ever done it for fun, so not super long term or anything but a wider cage (I have a thick cock which could be part of it)where you can slip in all the way where when you are flacid, your pee hole lines right up to the hole on the end. That way you can pee easily and you are comfortable enough without it pinching you constantly. You definitely can't get hard, but you could cum with a wand on it but it will be like a ruined orgasm which can also be good fun.

[Jeremie11231]

More on my experience with wearing the chastity cage -

The cage also made the difference between me and Josh feel more stark. Having the cage on felt like just another thing a guy like him would never accept, but that I was accepting. And as humiliating as it was to have him openly fucking Emily in our bedroom, it was so much more humiliating for him to know – while he was enjoying that – that my penis was encased in a tiny little masturbation-prevention device that I had to wear when he came over. Plus, his cock would never even fit inside the cage - it would be physically impossible. I don’t think they even make chastity cages that could fit his. Feeling the cage was a constant reminder of that – I was small enough to fit in it, and once in it, it kept me extra small. Feeling the difference between myself and Josh like that made me surrender ideas of trying to compete with him.

So, it was like it made it easier for me – easier to accept a lot of changes that at one time would have felt unacceptable or overwhelming. It was like the cage made everything clear and didn’t leave room for doubt about the way things were, and sapped my resistance to being cucked.

Wearing a chastity device also forced a merging of realities for me. It took the cuckold mindset and identity I got into at certain times, and made me live with it at other times, in other situations. I couldn’t just ‘switch’ when I wanted to leave the whole cuckold reality behind. I might find it kind of hot and kinky to be caged at home while Emily is with Josh, or even just walking around the house, talking to Emily. But then what about when I go to the hardware store? Or run into neighbors or people I know out there? Or just get a phone call from someone in my ‘normal’ life? What happens then?

I can tell you what happened to me – I didn’t like it. The first time I wore it throughout the daytime, I had agreed to the plan the night before, lying in bed on my back while she played with me a little bit. I was in a very eager state because it had already been days since I’d had any release, and she was sitting next to me on the bed and very gently touching my penis with two fingers and a little bit of lube. She told me Josh was coming over the following evening, and that led to talking about putting the cage on again before he arrived, and then the idea of putting it on in the morning instead of waiting until the evening. I agreed to that plan. I knew I might not like all of it, but it felt like a good idea to explore what it would be like. (And I knew she would be pleased to tell Josh that I was locked up all day leading up to his visit.)

The next day was full of unexpected little experiences. It wasn’t that it was physically uncomfortable – that part was fine, surprisingly enough. It was that I didn’t want to be a cuckold in lots of moments throughout the day, especially outside of the house. I was constantly aware of the device, every moment, enclosing my penis, reminding me of my cuckold reality. I also kept having thoughts that people could see it somehow through my pants, or that they could tell in some other way.

It was difficult for me to merge the man I thought of myself to be in public, with the man who actually had his penis locked in a little plastic device. Outside of the bedroom and the house, I had this whole other image of myself – a different identity. But the thing is, I really was actually a cuckold. Not just in fantasyland or in dirty talk with Emily, but really and truly in the factual world. Unless I went and got a pair of bolt cutters in some emergency, I was actually unable to touch my own penis. And I had to pee sitting down if I went to the restroom. And an actual man was regularly having sex with my wife. And I had to merge that reality with my “street identity”. Really what I had to do was let go of certain parts of my male ego.

And I think Emily knew that before I even realized it – it was one thing to do okay with being locked up in a moment when things were hot and going on with her and Josh in the bedroom. But if she was going to continue to have ongoing sex relations with a guy like Josh, and if she was going to feel safe and secure moving forward with that relationship, she knew I would need to be able to accept a cuckold identity even when things weren’t feeling hot. I needed to reinvent my day-to-day “real life” identity to include the very real fact that I was her cuckold husband, hot or not. And what better way to get that going than to make me have to move through my day and look people in the eyes while feeling this thing in my underwear and remaining continuously aware of the fact that I had voluntarily surrendered control of my penis to her? Emily’s transformation was about a lot more than just sex for her, and it had to be about a lot more than just sex for me as well.

And it took some time and repeated experiences, but she was right, and it worked. Iit was wearing the chastity device that pushed forward my psychological transformation from thinking of myself as a cuckold at home and in the bedroom, to understanding that I was a cuckold all the time.

Those initial experiences of humiliation and discomfort wearing the chastity cage were what I needed to start the process of giving up my old ideas about myself and my sexual identity in relation to my wife, and embracing the husband I actually was – a totally wonderful husband, and a man Emily loved very much. Those experiences paved the way for me to be able to begin talking (just a little bit) to my friends about Josh, and not try to hide the fact that I was a cuckold.

In the beginning I was very hesitant to admit to anyone that I was a cuckold, but once I did (to two of my closest friends), I felt a lot of relief. Trying to hide it from people close to me made me feel more ashamed, not less.
The weird thing that I wasn’t expecting was how the chastity device made me feel more connected to Emily, sexually and emotionally. It was like she was on my penis, the whole time it was on me, keeping me for herself. It was like while Josh was taking Emily’s pussy and making it his, she was taking my penis (and my pride) and making it hers. It made me feel loved - strange as that sounds.
It’s like Emily wears my surrendered pride and dominant masculine identity like a little trophy jewel on a necklace. With her beauty and seductiveness, she coaxed it out of me. She got me to give it up for her.

People wonder how someone can accept being a cuckold and not want to leave their wife – well, this is part of why. Once you’ve been through a process like this with a woman, where they slowly strip away your shell, taking away your old masculinity and showing you you are lovable without all that, you are so bonded to them.

[safira]

wow. i am continually surprised, amazed, and inspired by the quality of writing that i find in these pages. yours is not least of these. thank you so much for your insightful sharing.

[avid fan]

Thank you, great post... only a few contributors on here really drill down into the psychology of cuckolding and that was just as powerful as the most explicit retelling of the sex itself. Looking forward to reading the further developments and evolution of your relationship.

[Abrandnewstart194]

Fantastic job explaining the transformation from a guy who fantasized about being cucked, through the experience of being cucked, and finally surrendering and becoming a full cuckold. When my Queen and I started this journey, I was firmly in the first camp, fantasizing about how hot it would be for my love to be free to enjoy more, and potentially better sex than I can provide her. I thought of it as something she was doing for herself, but mostly for me, that it would be a few times a year to spice things up, and something from which either of us could walk away at any time.

The reality is very much different as cuckoldry takes hold, and what you once wanted to do turns into something you want to become. I’m not yet caged, though I lust powerfully for a cage, but I yearn for things Inever thought I could want, and I feel my own identity realigning around being ever more deeply cucked. I long to be caged, and to kneel by her bed while my Queen cucks me with superior Bulls. I revel in my inferiority, and submission, and want to serve her, her lusts, and her Bulls without reserve.

It is a dramatic and intoxicating transformation from who I was when I first posted here until now.

[Jeremie11231]

Thanks, everyone!
@abrandnewstart - 100% -- that's what fascinates me, is how the initial opening turns into something irreversible that takes on a life of its own. That's where I'm at with it, and experiencing both the anxiety and the relief of surrendering to the process.
I've sunk even way deeper in at this point -- almost caught up in telling the account of it here -- will post more as soon as I can.

[DLD]

In the retelling of the events, can you give us a timeline of when it started with Josh and how many months or years it’s been since then?