New marital developments

[Wantsomefunto]

Tacoma
I think a gentle nudge of saying maybe just agree to have lunch with him might help ease her worries and get her moving to doing more

[elina]

Thanks Tacoma,

I am glad to hear you are prepared to support Her.
I also think Wantsomefunto is on the right track.
The challenge is to nudge just so much that She can feel your love and willingness to do anything for Her to enjoy Herself, but not so much that She feels you are trying to take hold of Her steering wheel.

Sincerely
elina

[Shiphead]

Tacoma,
Someone asked earlier how often she brings up Joe's name first? More or less out of the blue? If so, does it only come up when you two are feeling frisky or at any time throughout the day when she's doing regular things at home?
Telling two friends is a huge step. It's on her mind and is looking for confirmation from someone she trusts. Zaylee then bringing it up to you immediately the next time you see her, is a big sign of your wife's interest. Zaylee is trying to get confirmation for your wife? Having 2 more witnesses that you are ok with the situation. Your wife is checking that she isn't reading the situation wrong. IMHO
Still so damn hot. I think this is some of the best time in this LS. Watching her change to considering doing it. You both benefit by increased bedroom action and you both have scenarios running through your minds and can take the fantasy wherever you want. It would be awesome if you can get her to tell you her Joe fantasy when you have a few drinks in her and she is really horny.

[BallSpanking]

It would greatly allay her apprehensions if she knew you are supportive of her ... 'interests'.

[Tacoma75]

I usually bring him up, always in a fun way, never serious. Last thing I want to do is scare her off or make her concerned. I’d say his name comes up at least once a week and probably more. I find I have a hard time actively encouraging her to see him. I did literally tell her once that I’m fine with “whatever she wants to do” which does seem to me to cover a lot of ground if you know what I mean. I do also ask on a regular basis if she plans to go out with him, which 1) serves as implied permission and maybe even encouragement, and 2) feels very naughty (in a good way) and I suspect she shares that feeling as well.

The biggest thing is we’re both having fun with this so I want to take utmost care it continues. While it is exciting to think about her going out with him, it’s also a little scary.

Just this week she has several times pulled out her phone in bed before going to sleep to send a text. Something that normally doesn’t happen. Now I’m wondering if she was messaging him and I am going to ask directly next time she does it, and have some fun with it either way. May seem like nothing big but it’s like pure excitement to me.

[BallSpanking]

I find this quite interesting, and you are probably well advised to keep the HotWife topic completely tacit. Your knowledge and implied consent, serve as a form of encouragement, especially if she understands 'naughtiness' is allowed, and you share her excitement vicariously.
As to her unusual bedtime texting, it could be nothing, but I have always trusted my gut ... When red flags start to appear, there is often good reason for them. Then again, these are behaviors you hope will only grow, right?

[Shiphead]

Be straight with her. Ask if Joe is still interested in your Sexy wife.Tell her that it makes you really hot thinking that a young guy finds her so attractive that he won't give up trying to see her. If you are hard, put her hand on it and say this is what it does when you think about him flirting with her. ( Dont mention anything further about a date or sleeping with him) keep it comfortable to know her flirting is amazing and makes you realize you need to step your game up and appreciate her more to keep up with the many guys and especially young guys who are after her.
If she is still texting ask if you can see them cause it turns you on. Doesn't make you mad.. Then start stepping up your game. Buy her lingerie, little gifts or just a card more often. Compose a poem and send it in a card. Send flowers with no name attached. Tell florist not to give it away who sent them.
Then quickly tell us what happens.
Everyone feels better when others find them attractive. Tell her how you have noticed changes in her ie way she dresses, increased sex drive, better sex, happier, whatever. She gives me a hard on and I don't even know what she looks like. Enjoy the great communication and increased excitement you feel. Just put yourself in her position and think what it would be like to be chased by a beautiful 20 something women. And your wife likes it and wants you to text, flirt, call and even fuck her.

[BallSpanking]

It seems Tacoma's entire approach is by implied consent. Speaking of it openly at this point could quash her delicate budding interest. I think he knows quite well how to communicate with his wife, and his cautious approach is evidence of that.

[Tacoma75]

I find this quite interesting, and you are probably well advised to keep the HotWife topic completely tacit. Your knowledge and implied consent, serve as a form of encouragement, especially if she understands 'naughtiness' is allowed, and you share her excitement vicariously.
As to her unusual bedtime texting, it could be nothing, but I have always trusted my gut ... When red flags start to appear, there is often good reason for them. Then again, these are behaviors you hope will only grow, right?

As far as behaviors growing, that’s where there is some uncertainty. I’m thrilled for her that she’s enjoying his attention, but if things were to really start escalating I’d also be a little scared. So my plan is to just enjoy the fun and see where it goes in time.

Having said that I have noticed her confidence and comfort levels with things have gone up substantially in the last week or so. After our dinner with friends and her showing me her phone she now appears 100% comfortable with things. She casually announced last night that he wanted to call again sometime and I told her that’s great and she should do it.

[Shiphead]

It seems Tacoma's entire approach is by implied consent. Speaking of it openly at this point could quash her delicate budding interest. I think he knows quite well how to communicate with his wife, and his cautious approach is evidence of that.

It isn't implied consent. They have talked very directly and discuss the situation the entire time. The only thing that Tacoma was questioning is the texting in bed. If he knows, then why are you telling me what he should do? Direct your comments and questions to him and don't worry about my comments. Anyone can post a comment or suggestion to him at any time. He can chose to read, ignore or answer anything about our suggestions or questions that he cares too. You don't have any more of an idea of his future actions than I do, Zoltar!

[BallSpanking]

Thank you for your explanation of what you think is happening with the OP.

[Shiphead]

Back atcha.

[Tacoma75]

Update on our saga. Joe called Betsy a few weeks ago after dinner. I was working outside in the yard but we had talked about it and she had full permission to take the call. When she told me about it later I was immediately happy and told her I was glad she talked to him, reiterating that I was very happy she was enjoying the attention. When she asked if I was jealous I told her not at all, which is 99% true :p. I asked if he was flirty and she said he was. Then I asked if she flirted back and she said not really and that she wasn't sure she should be doing that. I told her she should try it if she was in the mood, not wanting to push her. Since then he has been calling about twice a week. This past Monday she said he was going to call and that if she was going to try some light flirting with him, she wanted me in the room, which I quickly agreed to, trying to hide my excitement as best I could.

He called around 9, she was sitting on the bed with her knees up looking at her laptop, and I was sitting on the other side while I sat next to her looking at my phone. It was a little awkward before and during the call, probably for the both of us. He called and they began talking mostly about what they did that day. I could hear him at a low volume as they spoke. He asked "where's your husband" and she told him downstairs. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised but was when he asked what she was wearing. She told him panties and a t-shirt, which was a lie since she had on yoga pants, a long sleeve shirt and socks. I looked at her with a smile but she kept her eyes on her laptop as she held the phone to her ear. I of course started to get aroused and a second later when he asked what color were the panties and she said pink, I got almost fully hard. He said he bet she looked amazing in them, then added that if she was with him he'd be quick to slide them down and off of her. Almost as a reflex, without thinking I took her hand from the laptop and put it on the crotch of my pants. To my surprise she quickly ended the call, telling him she had to go because "my husband is coming". Some amazing sex ensued and that was that.

He texted all week. First trying to flirt with her in text and when that didn't really pick up, asking her to set some time aside alone so they could have phone sex. She said she would try, checking with me first of course, and they picked last night when I'd be "out with friends". Long story short they had phone sex with her using a headset. We agreed beforehand to fool around as she was talking to him and it went amazing. I couldn't hear him at all which was fine, but boy did she deliver some hot lines to him. She gave me a handjob and I came quick. Then I started fingering her while they talked and moved down the bed to eat her out as she told him she wanted to suck his dick and at the end that he could cum in her pussy. She was clearly very into it. I found this incredibly hot even though I had already finished. She ended the call quick after he came. The plot twist is that she didn't cum during the call. Instead she quickly got up to get some toys and got herself off twice, both times loud and intensely. More to come I'm sure.

[vicg]

Wow, that's quite a development! This is going somewhere!

[Shiphead]

I know it's already progessed beyond this thought I just had. (Keep in mind my experience with the lifestyle was years ago and brief, so my ideas are likely dated. Similar to a dad joke, which I hear from my son whenever I think I'm funny)
It may have been easier to tell her to go out on a date with him and make him work for it and pay for a couple dates so she could enjoy being chased and wanted again. Some dinner dates and any activity like dancing or even bowling, where he could make a little headway by kissing her and getting his hand under her shirt. She could control how far she would let him go. But take it in steps to prolong the excitement for you both. He would living with a hard on and she would have him in the palm of her hand. Then she could come home and share the joy of dating and also allow her to become more comfortable with him.
Just giving it up easily is taking away a lot of hot sex you two could share after each date. Most everyone agrees it is the journey that should be enjoyed. Not just the destination. Paraphrased, someone in another post said this is like being a virgin again and the excitement of her first time lived again.
Ok boomer. I'm out of date. Way past my expiration date.
Sorry for the long post.