Missed opportunity?

[teachmehow2fuck]

Once, when I was using the internet in the lobby of a hotel, a gorgeous 30-something woman walked by looking at me funny. I looked back at her with a neutral expression on my face, imagining what she looked like with out that nice skirt and gorgeous blouse. I tried not to let my face betray how much I was attracted to her as she walked by, and I gave her a smile.

About 10 minutes later she walked up to me, returned my smile this time, and asked if she could borrow my laptop cord to recharge her battery. She told me she had gone on her trip without the cord and wasn't able to use her computer because she didn't meet anyone with the same kind of laptop. She looked thrilled to have met someone with a power cord that would work, but it also seemed like she was a little bit flirtatious. I quickly looked at her left hand as she was gesturing towards the power cord and noticed she was married.

I said sure, and tried to look as enthusiastic as I could as she talked with me. She said she'd be back in about 20 minutes and asked if I would be there when she returned?

Well I waited about a half-hour, and she finally got back with her laptop. I had been planning what to say while she was gone, wondering if I could flatter her. I just love flirting with older women, letting them know a young guy would love to get in their bedroom...

So I quickly started up a benign conversation, asking her about her trip, what is she doing? Is she here with family? Yes, with her husband...bummer...

But still the conversation went VERY well, and it seemed like she was enjoying getting a little attention from a young guy. She had brought a wine glass (mistake #1 I didn't offer to buy her some more wine when she ran out), and was really having an impression on me if you know what I mean

But then the hubby showed up and I shut up like a clam right away. I felt like I was then obligated to talk with him, and although he was very personable, and didn't treat me coldly at all, she looked a little bit disappointed that I was no longer soley concentrating on her.

I still continued to talk with both of them, but with the husband right there, I didn't really find an opening to bring the conversation into a more interesting topic...

What should I have done? or was there really much more room available for me to make an impact? I can't help wondering if she talked with her husband about me staring at her legs...

[batmasterson]

I had something similar happen years ago. My wife is a HW although inactive for 5 years now.

I was at a bar alone years ago enjoying a drink and there was this attractive older couple there.

It became clear to me as they chatted that she was a HW. But it was never overt. I think we all were trying to figure out how to steer it there. I also think we were all wondering what was truly on the mind of the other person.

It was frustrating.

They eventually left.

It was a very hot experience though.

[ej1981]

It started out promising for you , but it sounds to me like it was the power cord she wanted.

[bigbulls]

You absolutely missed your chance. This is the perfect opportunity that couples like that look for. And it is no surprise that the hubby wasnt there at first, and that she had a glass of wine. And when you think about it, what the hell is 20 minutes of charging her battery going to do? It will only die in about 5 minutes of using it. You should have said something flirtatious like, why dont i come up and help you charge it...with her hubby standing there, it was the perfect opportunity for you to flirt really hard with her and just sort of ignore him. Guys go crazy over that. Most couples will put the signs out there, but then wait for the bull to take the lead. Hopefully you are in this situation again. If you are, you should call me and ill guide you thru it

[tommyg]

Remember the famous words, NO GUTS, NO GLORY!

The worse that could happen is they call you a jerk, you know the best that could happen.

Tommyg

[Rocketman]

Maybe and Maybe not! Hopefully you will get a response from some Hotwives and not just "guys who would have scored" if they had had opportunity. I can tell you that from our perspective a true hotwife will be more than just a little flirt! Offering to buy wine would have been a nice thing for you to move the ball forward and she may have taken the hint and gone from there. But the bottom line is if she wanted to hook up I believe she would have let you know! I know Ms Rocket would have let you know!

I have been on both sides of this and my experience has a Hotwife husband and as a 3rd is that it goes one of two ways: 1) if you show interest the Hotwife will push it until she either plainly (tells you) lets you know she is available or makes it very clear to you that if you should make a pass at her it will be complete. If their thing is for her to play alone then she will make sure her husband is not around or 2) she will make absolutely sure you are "hooked" and ready to be reeled in before she either announces that her husband wants to watch or be a part of a MFM or she will signal her husband to join you and he will actually make the offer!

Hotwives generally know what they want and do not wait around acting coy all night. She either 1) wanted to use your power cord and knew she could get you to go for it by flirting or 2) she decided that you were not showing her the proper amount of desire! All women want to be desired. One difference between hotwives and others is that if you let a hotwife know you want her she just migh let you have her! I do not mean to be pushy (although some seem to like that but I would not put Ms Rocket in that group) but there is nothing wrong with letting her know: how attractive she is, what a lucky guy her husband is (very effective with Hotwives) or how nice she looks. Not to mention light touching on the hand or arm and there is absolutely no substitue for looking at her like she is the "only woman in the world."

In my view the only place where you could have missed the boat was by taking attention away from her and putting it on her husband. You need to be nice to the husband and talk with him but a true hotwife husband will also understand why you cannot take your eyes off of his wife.

Rocketman

[Rocketman]

Teach me,
I do not post often but I need to revisit this: Bottom line, ALWAYS error on the side of been to shy not to agressive! The reason single guys are often banned from swing clubs and parties is couple's fear that they will act too agressive. There is a fine line between be a confident guy who makes a women feel desired and and arrogant jerk who thinks that it is the obligation of every Hotwife to have sex with him. Do not cross the line and you will be fine.

Rocketman

[jim joper]

The Rocketman's advice was very good. As a FB myself I feel that we ALWAYS must conduct ourselfs in a very respectful way with the wifes and couples. Being confident and assertive is OK but being arrogent jerk, and pushy is NOT OK. Don't beat yourself up about the missed opportunity as it happens to all of us at some time in life. The key is that the next time you find yourself in that situation that you have a plan.

I am going to give you some advice that I use in situations such as this that has worked very well for me. When I am in a public setting with a potential hotwive couple I chat with them on a normal way and look for signs from the wife and husband. I make GOOD EYE CONTACT with the wife and if she returns it then that is a good sign. I also look at some aspect of her dress and appearance and make a compliment on that. Also if we are at a place where there is drinking and the husband asks his wife if she wants another drink and she says yes that is also a good sign.

But here is the REAL comment that you should try that will put the ball in their court and then you can act accordingly. Say this to the husband and make SURE that the wife hears it as well. "You have a VERY attractive wife, how do you handle all the attention that she must get from men". His answer will give you a hint on where things may be going, also ask the wife for her take on the guys finding her attractive. If the husband says something like " he enjoys the attention that she gets as he knows that she is an attractive women and is proud of that fact" then that is a GO signal for you.

Still be respectful but then become more confident and tell them that you are one of those men that find his wife VERY attractive. If they are for real then the flow should go pretty good from there.

Hope this helps.