However, it’s time to switch gears for a moment and have an INTERLUDE in which we catch up on Felix and Celeste.
I've really been looking forward to writing this chapter for reasons that will become clear. Celeste, you're not allowed to read it
![yeehaw :whip:](./images/smilies/whip.gif)
Celeste was basically out of the picture completely during all these developments with Morgan, as she had opted to spend part of the year studying abroad. I missed her tremendously and couldn't wait to catch her up on everything. I knew she'd listen with rapt attention as I shared all the nuances of my evolving relationship with Morgan, and offer me wise and actionable counsel on how I should proceed.
And it just felt like our relationship could really embark on a new chapter at this point in general, free from all the anxiety and emotional cataclysm. The fact that she and Felix had officially broken up was not even of momentous concern to me; that’s how much I’d genuinely moved past my jealous entanglements.
As well, Felix had extended the olive branch, and the two of us formed our own real friendship for the first time, independently of Celeste. He and Celeste would continue to be entangled with one another as long as they lived in proximity at the same school, as was par for the course for these things. But it was emphatically no longer my problem or business.
Things worked out such that in the middle of all of this, while we were on break from class, Celeste flew out to the west coast to visit me.
This had been a long-standing goal between us; she’d taken me to her hometown and introduced me to her friends and family, and I had always been eager to share my world with her as well.
So just like that, while I was licking my wounds over the setbacks with Morgan, Celeste was a guest in my home for a few days.
I don't know how the stars aligned for it to happen like this, but they did. We were both single. I was no longer obsessed with her, having found a new target of infatuation. We hadn't seen each other in ages because of summer break followed by her studying abroad.
Dear reader, after literally years of yearning for the forbidden temple of her body, would you believe me if I told you that Celeste made all my dreams come true?
I'm not even sure how much I do want to tell you
![Wink ;)](./images/smilies/icon_e_wink.gif)
The arrangement during her stay was going to be us sharing a large bed together. Which was no big deal; we’d established during the road trip and other adventures that I was capable of keeping my hands to myself. I had no expectations this would play out any different.
My home was furnished with a hot tub. Celeste and I’d never resumed our habits of skinny dipping around campus together, and as far as I was concerned her comfort level on this front wasn’t something I even needed to make my business. I nipped it in the bud by mentioning how she would need a bathing suit on account of my two super-horny younger brothers who would be afoot.
Well.
I knew a switch had flipped between us when, immediately upon arriving home after retrieving her from the airport, she wanted to freshen up. I was explaining how to work the shower’s temperamental faucet. My words almost faltered as she just stripped naked beside me. In the middle of the day. With the fucking door open, and my family milling about the house.
What the fuck was happening?
I hadn’t seen her naked in quite some time, and never in such up close and glorious detail. And she looked absolutely stellar.
My facial expression must have been somewhere between quizzical and dumbfounded. The look she returned contained none of the customary expectation for me to remain stoic and ignore the fact of her nudity. She was, in fact, grinning at me like the goddamn cat that ate the canary. Like she was playfully daring me to react.
I maintained enough composure to finish my faucet tutorial. And then I reached out, telegraphing my intentions openly and casually, and ran a hand over the incredible body Celeste was displaying for me. Her skin felt like fucking electricity crackling under my palm. She had literally arrived at my house fifteen minutes beforehand, and this was happening.
Nothing was said, really. I might have uttered a “Jesus, Celeste...” She just fucking smiled at me with this knowing look, as if she’d won the first round of some game.
I shook my head in disbelief and left her to her shower. I closed the door behind me, since it seemed like it wasn’t going to occur to her to do so. Pinched myself to see if I was actually awake.
Okay, so Celeste was determined to spend her time in California being emphatically, unapologetically naked. I was a big boy, I could handle it, right? I’m not sure if she even did bring a bathing suit as I advised. She sure as fuck never donned it. My brothers and a couple of my friends became well acquainted with her naked tits. More on that later.
Then there was the sleeping arrangement. I do not remember how the naughty stuff started. We’d gone to bed with an appropriate distance between us, but when I woke up Celeste and I were cuddled intimately together. I was spooning her close, with a hand up her shirt groping her bare breasts, my erect penis working its way between her legs as she ground her ass against me in half-awake, involuntary thrusts.
Almost immediately, I had to pull away from her and blast away into my pajama bottoms. Wondering how awake Celeste had also been, how much trouble I was in.
I had only to wonder but an instant, because Celeste started laughing at me. “You came to my titties,” she taunted in a sing-song voice.
I guess she had beaten me in round 2 as well.
Things escalated from there. You don’t get to know all the details. I couldn’t express them even if I tried.
I quickly understood that there was an immense, yawning chasm between Celeste’s sexual prowess, and mine. On the spectrum of learning to walk before you can run, I was crawling and she was dancing. Skydiving.
Everything I had suspected from my windowed glimpses into her sex life were true. Truer than I possibly could have imagined.
The discrepancy was so blatant, pronounced, and unmistakable that we both literally had to chuckle at it. Like, the distinct memory I have is her saying, “That was… pretty good?” followed by our shared laughter at how unconvinced she’d sounded.
It wasn’t mean-spirited, it didn’t bother me; it was the simple truth of the matter.
I just felt so honored that she was, at last, sharing this aspect of herself with me. I do think I handled myself okay. I didn’t get weird about it or anything. I mean, I’m obviously weird in general but you get it.
She was very sweet. She didn’t make fun or compare me to anybody or anything like that. It didn’t hurt that she joined the ranks of women who were pleasantly surprised by nature’s generosity, gracing me with an incredulous “Dude.. why is your cock so fat?” that I immediately chiseled into my memory’s bedrock.
I finally understood the Lanaya / Steven effect where a guy could cum immediately and repeatedly from merely having a female barely gesture at his penis.
She was generous as well. I had fucking years worth of secret urges and fantasies stored up, and the unhesitant “okay!” (or "it is hard to resist..") she sang in response to my every voiced request would ring in my ears for some time.
—
But even better than all that, there was public nudity in a non-sexual context!
(I have no idea what the fuck is the matter with me.)
There was simply no universe in which Celeste was going to wear a fucking bathing suit to relax in our excellent hot tub. My two younger brothers, my parents, and any friends who were dropping by were just going to have to be mature about there being a naked girl in our midst, simple as.
Would you be shocked to learn that I was delighted beyond measure at this new normal?
My bros did manage to play it cool, for the most part, but you could tell they were pretty giddy as well. My friends, too. Anyway, Celeste was a hit. People who knew that I’d had a big thing for her went out of their way to tell me that they got why.
Did I invite fucking Lanaya over in the course of all this and try to get them both naked in my hot tub together? I can’t remember if that actually happened. Maybe I was wise enough to recognize it for the Icarus move it would have been.
One moment that stands out to me. It was towards the end of Celeste’s visit, and my brother was exchanging goodbyes with her. She and I happened to be in the hot tub at the time.
“I’d give you a goodbye hug,” he said, “but you’re probably in there naked, so..”
But this wasn’t a problem for Celeste. “As long as you don’t mind me getting you wet,” she said, the water cascading off her naked form as she rose up for the embrace.
Hopefully Celeste wasn’t gutterminded enough to read this whole section, because I sure would be mortified for her to know how high that little detail ranks in my personal spank bank.
—
Did all of this undo eons of emotional growth and send me careening back into the abyss of infatuation with Celeste? No! It really was just a casual and fun experience between people who were finally on the same page about it, such as we were.
I got to be Celeste’s special friend. In my dramatic, self-centered world, it felt like one of the great imbalances of the universe had finally been put right.
That said… fine, I admit it was hard to get over the physical aspects of what had transpired. And maybe you could accuse me of never truly having moved past it, since here I am unburdening my damn soul about it decades later.
Okay, so I’d played “just the tip” with an iceberg representing depths of pleasure I would surely never get to chart in full*, with Celeste or with anybody. It wasn’t even jealousy at this point, so much as envy. The expectations placed on any future partner of mine would be considerable.
Yep, it was something I would use to gently torture myself for some time. The what-ifs. The various ways Celeste and I could have taken further advantage of that tiny liminal space that opened up for us on her visit to the west coast, only to snap shut just as quickly when we returned to real life.
Like, what if I’d actually been able to handle her for more than, uh, 2-3 seconds a time? What might that have been like?
![Shocked :shock:](./images/smilies/icon_eek.gif)
But I was also wise enough by this point to realize this was simply how my mind was going to work, no matter what. I’d always find a reason why there was some life-changing sexual adventure I should feel tormented over missing, even in the midst of having a life-changing sexual adventure.
Maybe just a little bit of torment can be a treat.
—
Celeste will keep showing up in the narrative, but this here was the grand finale of our story together as I understand it.
Stay tuned for our next installment, in which we return to school and I attempt to get things back on track with Morgan!
* I tried to resist this turn of phrase, I really did