Cheating and Sharing Simultaneously

[Nuestrasecreto]

Never understood why but any woman that has ever aroused me, I don’t think I’d turn down “watching” her get it on. This after all is the draw of porn right? You get to sit back at see the response a woman has to what’s being done to her while not having to focus on doing these things.

Somewhere around 5 years into my marriage I noticed that the “unfaithful wife” scenario added exponentially to this. There’s something about a woman being so drawn to a man that she’s willing to go against societal norms to be with him. The risk, the arousal, the newness and novelty stir a woman into bliss. You can’t fake this shit.

Some years ago I suggested opening things up a bit in our bedroom. The swinging scene was LOTS of fun. Meeting new couples, (both people) feeling like partners in crime with your spouse as well as the other couple, all of it was very enjoyable to me. The sex not so much for her. While there were quite a few fun times the men from almost every couple we played with over the years never delivered. She decided a few years later that she was done with the swinging scene. I was surprised and disappointed at the same time. Things change and you move on.

Unfortunately this didn’t end my overwhelming desire and interest into extramarital sex. I got my fix my having a string of lovers on the side. No I didn’t get to watch my beautiful wife getting fucked, but I did however get to witness women I’d seduced do and allow me things that they didn’t at home. Single girls didn’t do it for me. Married and NEEDING side dick was where it was at for me. There is something so beautifully mesmerizing about when a married woman gives in to her most forbidden desires. I’m definitely hooked on this side of things. These illicit relationships were secrets and I have went to great lengths to prevent the pain of them coming to light. I am fairly certain my primary relationship wouldn’t survive otherwise. I fucked and made love to my wife as usual, sometimes more. This might be hard to believe but as things progressed my sex life at home seemed to benefit from it at times.

I continued to harbor fantasies of sharing my wife. I might have been getting to play the “bull” role in a different way but I still wanted my wife to have variety as well. Over time we started to talk about it at times during sex. I would almost always bring it up and she would respond in turn. Over time she would occasionally bring it up on her own. This wasn’t something we did or do every single time but it definitely became more and more frequent. I had for sure not “cured” myself of this fantasy. Now seeing the other side with women that were actually cheating, I wanted this type of sex for my wife.

Somehow several months back her views changed around the subject. She warmed up to the idea and eventually became somewhat enthusiastic about one day doing it. We’d definitely experienced the same thing before and enjoyed when m had a couple threesomes with the third being a guy. Then one day she all but agreed to try it. I quickly realized that she was serious and made use of some online resources. I didn’t mention the online profiles we now had until a couple weeks later. After I saw that her interest had not waned, I told her about them. They were still somewhat blank with no information or photos, I didn’t even know which of the four sites we were going to focus on. When I told her this she seemed very excited. A week later after a night of what had become a normal occurrence, I sent her the info. This was a much slower pace than how things had unfolded in the past.

Fast forward to today. We have met and are making plans to meet to meet more men for a possible threesome. All while I still am deep into of my own endeavors. The current situation is now going into well over six months and another married woman and I continue to meet for sex. This sex has gotten crazy might I add! I would not be afraid to believe her when she tells me that this is the best sex she’s ever had in her entire life. It’s almost unnerving to think how she would react should I ever put a stop to it.

Those of you that are going to play the “you’re lying” “you’re cheating” card. I’m not really interested in your subjective morality. Opinions are simply that. If we’re going to define “rights and wrongs”we have to all remember that if you live by the sword you die by the sword. This entire genre of swinging would be rejected by almost any list of set morals within even remotely vaguely religious groups. My wife doesn’t like being totally monogamous but only played like she did to prevent me from having the variety I enjoy. We both very much enjoy experiencing new people.
My question is that if a man can play with several women as a bull to whatever capacity for however long, why can’t a hotwife husband? Given nothing comes to light of course on my end. I don’t doubt that these things could and probably would end in a supernova. Will I eventually explode into flames for all the sex I’m having? Will I eventually lose interest in sex altogether after becoming jaded? Will I lose interest in one because the other takes up all of my headspace?
How can I make this work and keep my shit in check?