From hotwife to poly?

[ktcouple]

I'm wondering if anyone here made the transition from a purely sexual (or kink) based dynamic to something more "generally" open or poly?

My wife and I have been in the hotwife and swinger lifestyles for a few years now and we recently started a discussion about our next step and the topic of more meaningful connections came up. We're talking about regular dating apps now, so she would get her own profile on Tinder and alike. I’m fine with this and support her in going out on casual dates and build connections more organically compared to how we did it before on lifestyle sites. But those connections might also result in different expectations. If she will have a boyfriend, who isn’t that familiar with the lifestyle, or my involvement, he might want more privacy or maybe even commitment or exclusivity. That would be very different from how it was for us before, where I was always involved in some way. Those sexual relationships were transparent (pics and information shared). I'm a bit worried that I might feel left out and resentment might build up or how to handle such situations in the best way.

So those of you who went on this road, how did you navigate it?

[Cgb29]

Yes, my wife started as a hotwife who ended up falling for one of them. After tons of communication between us, we decided to jump into the poly lifestyle and we've enjoyed it since.

[ktcouple]

Yes, my wife started as a hotwife who ended up falling for one of them. After tons of communication between us, we decided to jump into the poly lifestyle and we've enjoyed it since.

It's good to hear that this transition worked out well for you. Were there any challenges? How does your dynamic look like?

[Cgb29]

Yes, my wife started as a hotwife who ended up falling for one of them. After tons of communication between us, we decided to jump into the poly lifestyle and we've enjoyed it since.

It's good to hear that this transition worked out well for you. Were there any challenges? How does your dynamic look like?

She has a boyfriend who is also married.. His wife is poly also and has a bf herself.

They are together about once a week and occasionally go away for overnights. He comes here and hangs out pretty often. He and I are great friends, but are not involved romantically. We do have threesomes though.

[patw3268]

If I was a single, I’d want to be the 2nd guy in a poly relationship and share her with another man. I am happy spending nights alone but I wouldn’t want to sleep around either.

I’d also like to be friends with him. It be fun to play a game of golf or whatever and winner takes her home.

[Experimenti3]

I think it is usually like that. Me and my wife has been into hotwife and swinger lifestyle for about10 years, when we finally met the current lover of my wife. It was 8 years ago. My wife is 53 yo and he is 35yo. He is married but his wife is not aware of her husbands other relationship. He and my wife are very close and intimate now, I mean 8 years being together is quite a long time. They meet in my presence, but very often they meet alone too. No matter with or without me, it is always so hot and exciting.
As I mentioned in another story, I even bought a studio/apartment as a present for my wife and her lover, so that they have a place where they can meet comfortably.

[isinlarsa]

My situation developed a bit differently from the other posts. My girlfriend and I were in a monogamous relationship for a couple of years. Then she said she wanted to take dancing lessons, ballroom type dancing. Of course, while taking the lessons she met another student who piqued her interest. She and I discussed it and we agreed she could take him. That led to them having intercourse, and developing a relationship of their own. She kept him as a second boyfriend. He led her into swinging, which eventually involved me.

So her situation was she had two boyfriends and was also having sex with other men. Sometimes she stayed with her second boyfriend and some nights she stayed with me. Occasionally the three of us would share a bed.

[Elly_Wilde_]

Yes, my wife started as a hotwife who ended up falling for one of them. After tons of communication between us, we decided to jump into the poly lifestyle and we've enjoyed it since.

It's good to hear that this transition worked out well for you. Were there any challenges? How does your dynamic look like?

She has a boyfriend who is also married.. His wife is poly also and has a bf herself.

They are together about once a week and occasionally go away for overnights. He comes here and hangs out pretty often. He and I are great friends, but are not involved romantically. We do have threesomes though.

This sounds like such a perfect arrangement. I would imagine that communication and openness are the real keys to making this work. I would also think that your wife's partner being married also gives a bit of reissuance that things are going to go off in a bad and possessive direction. Would love to know more about how you make this dynamic work.

[Johnann2227]

My wife and I began our journey as swingers when we were 20 and 19. We played every weekend with friends and at clubs and house parties. I quickly discovered that I enjoyed watching my wife getting fucked by other men. After about 5 years or so we decided to fully open our marriage and we could fuck anyone anywhere. Ann would have girls' nights out and always would have guys hit on her. Now she would let them pick her up and fuck her in their car, in the toilets, in a nearby park etc. That led to her going back to their place and staying the night and returning home to me (sometimes late the next afternoon).

Sometimes she would find someone special and she would date him for a while. We always had the agreement that if feelings formed the relationship had to end. That was the rule for years.

Kids came along and our swinging stopped for a while. After our daughter was born it took a while for Ann to get her body back. Combined with breastfeeding she just didn't have the confidence to swing. Eventually we did start playing again with our group and even when Ann was 6 months pregnant with our son she was still comfortable swinging in our group. When our son was 6 months old Ann got back into swinging. While she enjoyed our swinger friends sucking her breast milk in an orgy she wasn't ready for random pickups to do that. Eventually she started fucking other guys and dating a few. Our kids were young and didn't notice mummy not being home at breakfast. Eventually when they were 8 and 5 they started asking questions. So her hotwifing stopped but our swinging was fine.

When our kids were about 16 and 13 we decided that Ann would go back to hotwifing. She would go out with some of the other wives in our swinger group every Friday night and they would pick up guys and sometimes girls. Our rules was that she had to be home Saturday morning for our son's soccer game. All the wives used each other as alibis for their kids questions.

Soon she was actively dating special guys. This turned into Tuesday night date nights and Friday night sleepovers. Tuesday nights we told our kids that Ann was having dinner with other teachers in her book club. She was always home by midnight and the kids were always asleep so never saw the state she came home in. This worked well for a few years. Date night Tuesday, sleepover Friday and our group swinger night every Saturday.

Eventually our daughter noticed things weren't what they seemed. She noticed what Ann was wearing to her "Book club" nights and that she was coming home in a state on Saturdays. At home we all live as nudists. Our daughter noticed hickies on her mother's boobs and inner thighs. She could see her red, puffy pussy which obviously hadn't been caused by me. Our daughter decided that Ann was cheating on me.

We confessed to our daughter that we are swingers and have been for over 25 years. We also explained our hotwifing lifestyle to her. Eventually she came to understand, accept and then embrace our lifestyle choices. If Ann was going on a date our daughter would help her get ready. They would always share details of Ann's dates when she came home. When our son turned 18 the three of us told him about our lifestyle. He eventually came on board also.

This year Ann met a guy called James on one of her Friday night girls' nights. He was 32 gorgeous and hung. She et him finger her in the booth in the club, sucked his cock in the ladies toilets and then fucked him in the carpark. She came home glowing and talk8ng non-stop about James. They hooked up a few weeks later and this time she went back to his apartment. She had date night the following Tuesday and was hooked.

I met him and was also impressed. Tall, handsome, great body, intelligent and a gorgeous cock. He stayed at our house that nighr and we had our first threesome together. We all felt a connection that night.

The next morning our kids met James and immediately liked him. He spent the day tanning nude around our pool with the four of us. Soon he was staying over regularly and Ann was staying at his apartment. James is bi and initiated contact with me by sucking my cock.

We eventually came to a family agreement to ask James to move in with us. Ann, James and I share our bed everynight. We have introduced James into our swinger group. James and I are now lovers. Daily we suck each other's cocks and I fuck him a couple of times per week.

Ann and James are now "engaged". James bought Ann a beautiful ring for her birthday and asked her to also be his wife and she said yes. She wears our weddibg ring on her left hand and her and James's on her right. They are having a "vow" ceremony performed by a celebrant in late November. It won't be an official legal marriage but will be to us. Ann gas started giving her name as Ann ### - @@@@ James's surname hyphenated with mine). She can't sign official documents with that name but is using it.

In our house and our swinger group of friends we are completely poly. Our family eg parents, brothers, sisters etc have met James but just think he is a workmate of mine. We explained his moving in with us on high interest rates and James having to rent his apartment out. He comes to all family get togethers and everyone likes him. It is an amazing feeling watching James have a beer with Ann's dad and talk football together at a BBQ when an hour before he had fucked Ann silly and pumped a big load deep into her pussy (which I cleaned up for her). If only her father knew how much cock his daughter was getting each day!

So poly for us has been life-changing. We are all lovers together and are in love.

[Cgb29]

Yes, my wife started as a hotwife who ended up falling for one of them. After tons of communication between us, we decided to jump into the poly lifestyle and we've enjoyed it since.

It's good to hear that this transition worked out well for you. Were there any challenges? How does your dynamic look like?

She has a boyfriend who is also married.. His wife is poly also and has a bf herself.

They are together about once a week and occasionally go away for overnights. He comes here and hangs out pretty often. He and I are great friends, but are not involved romantically. We do have threesomes though.

This sounds like such a perfect arrangement. I would imagine that communication and openness are the real keys to making this work. I would also think that your wife's partner being married also gives a bit of reissuance that things are going to go off in a bad and possessive direction. Would love to know more about how you make this dynamic work.

It's just kind of what we fell into and it comes natural to us, I think. Feel free to message if you want to talk more, though.

[Dse2012]

Familiar story here. Started as swingers but ultimately found one guy who became (seemingly) permanent. They’ve been together for 9 years now. We tried all living together but that didn’t really work for any of us. Too much togetherness. So she and he bought a house together and she and I have our own house. Sometimes he stays over at our place for a few days, sometimes she and I have one on one time and sometimes she stays at their place. The key has been communication. Lots of it.

[irishstag41]

My wife played the field for three years but now has a steady relationship with her boyfriend. It was daunting at first but now we both love it. She told me she loves him but loves me too . Just in different ways. Sex is even more awesome now

[inivisibletwin]

I go more into details in the post linked in my signature, but back in 2019 my wife (then girlfriend) had 3 regular fwb's. they were roommates, so it was easy for her to spend time with all three of them.

One of them, Chris, eventually admitted to developing feelings for her, which in the past would have meant she'd stop seeing him, but I suggested she see more of him instead of breaking it off. She was hesitant but she did. after a few months she could tell he was getting attached, so I suggested she actually date him and see how it goes. We could always end it if it didnt work out.

shes had many fwb's over the years, some that were regulars for a long time, but it had always been casual. whenever feelings get involved she would end it. her and i talked through it, and decided to talk to him about it.

we told him she would usually have ended things when the get catches feelings, but we wanted to consider her dating him instead. it would mean he's dating a married woman, he'd have to be okay sharing her with me, and with any other fwb's. after some discussion he said he was perfectly fine with all that if it meant she'd be his girlfriend.

so they went in a few actual dates and eventually she asked him to be her boyfriend. this was a big step for us because this was the first time she's had an actually boyfriend since me... and i was her first boyfriend, so even though she's had many sexual partners, chris became only her second ever boyfriend.

then the pandemic hit and lock downs meant she didnt see him for weeks, we felt that that might be the end of their relationship, but we didnt want that, so we invited chris to stay with us during lock downs, so he and my wife could continue to see each other.

the plan was for it to be temporary, and for him to go back to his apartment after lock downs, but lock downs went on for so long that it kinda unofficially became permanent.

here we are years later, my wife and chris are still boyfriend / girlfriend, chris still lives with us, chris and i get along great, we are good friends, he gets to call my wife his girlfriend, and all though he shares her with other guys he is still her boyfriend, and he's happy with that, and so am i.

in our case things are working out great! and none of the 3 of us see any reason to end things any time soon.

though i completely recognize my situation to be unique.

[JackRawls]

I see no reason why a wife can’t have a live in boyfriend. I’m sure she’d enjoy sex with 2 men constantly. Viagra can make her in high demand in that scenario.