Be careful what you wish for

[warmnsalty]

So I introduced my wife to hot wife-ing. We had some great times, lots of communication etc. I've always encouraged her to get her slut on.. well she did. Couple years ago she got the urge and started fucking guys, I was there all good.She met a girl who's an escort, she encouraged my wife to try it. Mrs and I talked about it, she fucks guys for free.... so fucking guys for $ is an added bonus. Well, she started, got sucked into drugs etc. Spent the last year using .... says shes clean, I have no idea ... but she's living in an apt and seeing 2 or paying customers most days. We're headed for divorce, never expected this from her. Be careful what you wish for.

[Treat yourself girl]

Damn man. Sorry for ya.

[warmnsalty]

me too, she's an amazing woman when she's not using, never knew her using, eye opening

[warmnsalty]

me too, she's an amazing woman when she's not using, never knew her using, eye opening

[leggysman]

I'm really sorry to hear that.

Without knowing the whole story (obviously), here are some unsolicited thoughts. I would think that the only way through this to a truly happy ending would be the most difficult one. If she's worth it, and if you were able to stick through this with her, and be strong enough to resist the 'out' of divorce, and support her recovery - assuming she has that desire somewhere inside.

I have to think that being a divorced, drug-addicted prostitute is not ultimately what she wants her life to be. Hopefully the life you had together ought to be an attractive alternative, if she knew she could earn it back.

[FNQLivin]

This has come on quickly. Only in October everything seemed fine?

[Natatude]

Oh no! I’m sorry that had happened! Hopefully she can get help and straighten her life back up before she looses it!

[WSCuck]

Yeah unfortunately drugs can take the best of them. I always wish my hotwife would have a friend who she hotwives with but that’s the one thing that scares the crap out if me.

[trecital]

Your posts in mid October don't give any hint of any problem. What happened?

[sandy691196]

I'm really sorry to hear that.

Without knowing the whole story (obviously), here are some unsolicited thoughts. I would think that the only way through this to a truly happy ending would be the most difficult one. If she's worth it, and if you were able to stick through this with her, and be strong enough to resist the 'out' of divorce, and support her recovery - assuming she has that desire somewhere inside.

I have to think that being a divorced, drug-addicted prostitute is not ultimately what she wants her life to be. Hopefully the life you had together ought to be an attractive alternative, if she knew she could earn it back.

In her present state she obviously cant think straight.. People making money off of her (if agencies or agents are involved or those "friends") are reinforcing her behaviour and attitude. The easy money and independence make it comfortable for her to sink in the quick sand further.
Unless someone can make her see the future during one of her sober moments, she wont agree to rehab or for dunking the easy money and taking the tough path to a better life.

[bradisalpha]

I am so sorry. This seems to be a downfall that can easily come up once a wife has sex with another.. why give it away ??? I have had it come up in conversations but I always have been able to nip it in the bud right away. I am quick to say that would be a very big turn off for me. This lifestyle is for a couple to freely let their own personal desires and cravings come to the surface and to enjoy each others together.. the key word is together. These are personal pleasures to share with each other and I as a BF, am there to see to it that they enjoy their private pleasures to the fullest.

Selling sex is a business.. a whole different world no matter how hot it might sound. Sandy has said it best.. if in a sober moment she can see and realize what she has lost, a rehabilitation program will help her get back to her old self and save your marriage. Unfortunately, the odds are against you, but try very hard before you give up.

My best wishes are with you.

Brad

[hornedhubby]

Very sad. My best friend got divorced a few years ago because his wife was an out-of-control alcoholic. After three rehab stints, etc. He gave it his best shot, but still an awful ending.

Has your wife reached that point where she is no longer even willing to recognize her own problems and accept help?

Best wishes.

[Tank Turner]

Hi warmandsalty,

A tragic and sad story.

I hope you're able to get her far, far away from her environment and into rehab.

I agree with leggysman. I doubt that your wife envisions her life as a divorced, drug addicted prostitute.

Remain optimistic that you can rescue her from her downward spiral.

[venus-can99]

I am so sorry to hear about the relationship at a breaking point. Wish you can standby her and get her into rehab and let her see what a wonderful person you are.
Regardless wishing you the best…

[BrunetteLover]

Do not blame anything leading up to her addiction for causing it. I have a sister-in-law who is battling addictions her entire life, and she blames such and such for causing those addictions. Different song, same tune. Every time.

I have always hated those typical family discussions, that try to place blame on 'bringing the flu/cold/stomach virus etc etc. home' such as "Well, I think it was Johnny who brought the cold home from 3rd grade" - the cold is out there, and if it is going around, you are eventually going to get it.

Addiction is similar. The willingness to get into it or out of it is with the person, not anyone else. You can remain there for her, and I hope you do, but do not blame yourself.

[Greg_N_Shelley]

I'm very sorry to hear this. And unfortunately, it's not a surprising situation.

Years before I met Shelley, I had a casual relationship with an exotic dancer from Colorado who worked a traveling circuit on the east coast. We'd hook up whenever she was in town, and then I wouldn't hear from her for months in between. During that time I got to meet a lot of her friends (other girls doing the same thing). Nearly all of them were alcoholics or drug addicts. She had her own demons (history of abuse in her family), but amazingly steered clear of substance abuse.

It's a different situation than prostitution, but something about the business of sex seems to often lead into substance abuse. I've seen it with my daughter's friend from childhood as well. Sweetest kid and super pretty when she was young, and today is a well-known porn actress and less-known drug addict.

It seems to be cultural in the sex business ("Try it, everyone's doing it!"). And for many, it perhaps begins as self-therapy for a traumatic past that led to sex work in the first place.

Wishing you and your wife peace and love on her path to recovery! That is of course, if she so chooses.

And like others have said, don't blame yourself.

[zorro]

I agree with many of those here, and would only add a couple of thoughts:

1. Substance abuse proclivity often runs in families, so those with a clean wife with a substance-abusing family history need to take care not to tempt the Devil.

2. Prostitution is an all too common way for women to maintain access to drugs of abuse. So, substance use disorders and prostitution can easily segregate together. I suspect your wife's "friend" was not only an escort but also into abuse. Of course, I can't prove it, but I would not be surprised in the least. So, your wife may have been seduced into both prostituting and drug abuse. Her "friend" may also have become her dealer, or they might well have had a pimp using them to pay for his own lifestyle and drugs by selling them or drugs to raise money. I have no way to know any of this is true in the case of your wife, but I have seen too many cases to dismiss the probability.

3. It may take more than going into substance use recovery to salvage your wife. If any of what I suspect is true, essentially she might have to extract herself from a crime ring as well as give up using. She would have to become motivated to leave a very ugly existence to even consider going into recovery.

4. I know some HW hubbies are entranced by the idea of the wife fucking for money. And I most definitely respect any woman who wants to explore this side of her sexuality and control over men. I only wish to caution that fucking for money can become more than fucking for money when a woman gets sucked in the drug and prostitution industry that can kill a girl. Not only the tricks but the pimps and the drugs have been known to kill too many women. And there is a subset of serial killers who target female prostitutes to satisfy their sexual sadistic urges.

I too hope you can get your wife back and save her life.

[BrunetteLover]

After almost 15 years of posting here, it's really time for me to put the fantasy aside and get real. This topic demands nothing less.

Everything I have said here over the past 15 years has been true to the absolute best of my recollection, there is no need to exaggerate the scenes that my wife and I have gotten into during that time.

Yes, she was a stripper, then a stripper who was willing to go further, and then into full-on escorting.

And no, nothing bad has ever happened, and the worst episode involving substances was when she was chugging a bottle of a fruity liquid from a plastic bottle at a really wild stripper gig.

It turned out to be cheap rum.

A lot of it.

I and my 3 teenage kids had to carry mom into the house, and yes, there was a lot of explaining to do.

That said.... I have, of course, since this is a 'fantasy' website, played into the hotwife/hooker fantasy via selective memory, and selective disclosure.

In reality, it's a really nasty world out there. Really nasty.

There were a few parties that got out of hand. There were a few that we had to bail on in a hurry. There was even one time, after driving an hour and a half to the gig, I gave the full amount of cash back to the leader of the group, I read the room and realized I was not getting out of there with the cash in hand without a fight. They were potentially physically abusive to my wife (they smacked her ass) and she wanted out. I gave the money back, there was no fight, and we just went home.

Those scenes were rare, there was never any trouble with an escort date, and she is still interested in the lifestyle.

BUT... This is an occupation which requires stone cold nerves, a lot of street experience, and a no-mistakes-are-tolerable attitude. It is absolutely a rare combination in which someone can pull it off.

Bottom line, the chances of failure are very high, the stakes are high, and most people would probably end up similar to where the poster warmnsalty is right now.

I have more to say, and more to disclose, but I don't want to do it on a public forum. If anyone wants to message me, I will be willing to go further with this discussion in private.

[venus-can99]

Thanks for your your honest post outlining the real dangers that this fantasy can lead to

[BrunetteLover]

My wife and I had a running joke about bachelor parties gone bad. Guys getting drunk, abusive, potentially violent...

[BrunetteLover]

The joke was based on an old political saying...

"You can sashay in high heels and a thong into a bachelor party, but....

https://www.amazon.com/vote-into-Social ... B08P8W5J9C