Punishments for naughty hotwife

[Stagwatchingwife]

So my naughty hotwife was at her new boyfriend's house for 2 nights.
They fucked 4 times, he came on her face, her tits, in her pussy, on her ass, they showered together, hung out, walked along the beach etc.

She has insisted all the time that if she is seeing any other guys then it must work for all three of us involved. This time it didn't.

Our rules are that she must send me the occasional photos and videos of when she is playing with other men if I am not there. 2nd rule is that the guy must wear a condom. The whole two nights she was away I received not a single photo or video from her.
He fucked her without a condom every time.
I have had a fantasy for years of her showering with another guy, she even said before she went if I would like to see a video of them in the shower. They showered together but I got no video.

I did message her on the first night after they had already fucked twice to ask if there was any chance of any photos and videos? She said she had something planned and would send it to me, so I thought it must be something pretty hot.

Fast forward to the following afternoon, still no photos or videos and they had already fucked in the morning, by this stage I was not enjoying the experience because I was completely left out and forgotten about.

She messaged me and she could tell things were off because I was not saying much back in the messages at this point. So she called me and I said it's not much fun for me if you guys are fucking constantly and I'm not getting anything back..again she said she would send me something soon.

She then send a video of the golf course next to the beach then a photo of her boyfriend standing naked in the water.....why would I want a photo of him or a golf course or the sea???

They were meant to be going out for dinner after their beach date but she messaged me and said they were just going to stay in and order take out because they were tired. I messaged back "are you going to fuck him again" and she replied "yes", I then sent the thumbs down emoji because I was pretty fed up by this point.
I expected her to call me and rectify what was going on but instead he fucked her again even though she knew that I was not happy.

I felt really bad, horribly disconnected, cheated, betrayed, and completely not involved in anything whatsoever.

She arrived home the next morning and she knew that I was upset, she apologized. She told me that she had originally planned to surprise me and do a video with him fucking her in her bridal underwear that she wore to our wedding but I had mentioned at some point previously that I don't find white underwear attractive so she decided not to do that.
So instead she sent nothing.

She said she really liked being with him and that the sex was good but when she realized how upset I was she got very apologetic about not sending me anything.
There was no reclaiming sex or anything.

She also did the same last year with a previous boyfriend, she stayed over two separate nights at hotels with him and I got a 3 second video. When I picked her up in the morning both times she was hungry and wanted to go for breakfast, there was no reclaiming sex.

It seems when she is with other guys now she totally forgets or ignores that I exist and that it is meant to involve the three of us.

I am trying my hardest to get over it but it is a challenge.

We spoke at length today about ways to overcome it.
We spoke about setting sexy challenges / punishments perhaps or ways for her to make it up to me.

Please let me know your opinions on what my naughty hotwife should do to make it up.

What you think of the above and if you have any suggestions to move forward to make things work.

[dorsetben]

Sounds tough mate. I feel for you.

[thepen]

When I saw the title I assumed it was something in the vein of play, where she was on board with being "punished". But you're serious, and seriously butthurt. Honestly, you sound like a spoiled, entitled child.

My opinion? You should tell her that you've thought long and hard and realize now what a buzzkill and burden it must be on a woman when she has to constantly think about entertaining her husband with pictures, and that it detracts from her being "in the moment" with the other man on her adventures.

Suck it up, watch some porn if you must, and let her own her own body and sexuality.

[Parsifal]

I was expecting you to conclude with a few paragraphs about how she had to pay off a major debt to you in the form of her submitting to some delicious punishment you exact in order to earn her right to be reclaimed.

In my affair game with my wife, I do stipulate that if I catch her and bust the affair, she will have to submit to a punishment even if it's not the way she prefers getting off.

[Her number1]

When I saw the title I assumed it was something in the vein of play, where she was on board with being "punished". But you're serious, and seriously butthurt. Honestly, you sound like a spoiled, entitled child.

My opinion? You should tell her that you've thought long and hard and realize now what a buzzkill and burden it must be on a woman when she has to constantly think about entertaining her husband with pictures, and that it detracts from her being "in the moment" with the other man on her adventures.

Suck it up, watch some porn if you must, and let her own her own body and sexuality.

I agree with you completely!

[Cdncuck]

You're trying to micro manage this. Do you want to be in a hotwife relationship or be a porn movie director? When she's out with the other guy, leave her alone. From what you've posted this is all about you without much thought for what she might need or want.

If you want to be part of the show, you guys should consider doing mfm with a guy. When she's out, she's out. How can she relax and have a good time with you sticking your nose in every few hours?

You say you were upset when she got home. She should have ripped you a new one for being such a nuisance. If I ever treated my wife like this she'd have my balls for bookends.

[rm_andromeda694]

You had me right up to the punishment thing.

I completely understand the need to feel included and how it is to be left out.

If she can't deal with your need for an occasional pic, vid clip, or descriptive text, then maybe this isn't something you should be doing.

In my wife's first (and so far, only) encounter, we had a similar experience. Before the date she made a big deal out of how she was going to tease me. I got two vanilla texts about eating dinner and watching a movie and one topless pic with no description. In 16 hours. Turns out the pic was taken right after they had fucked and her nipples were swollen from him sucking on them. A short descriptive text telling me that with the pic would have meant everything to me.

We talked, and she understands what I need from her now. And her whispered retelling of the scene into my ear was hot. And she's going to write it all down as a true erotic story. She's good at that. Next time there'll be a lot more inclusion and we'll eventually be same room with me recording.

How about if you were in the room taking pics and video? Would that work? Would she be OK with it?

Either way, it's got to work for all three of you or it's not something you should be doing.

[Coolcalm]

On another side of this. You have a right and a say of what happens in YOUR marriage. You both (I sense from your original post) had an understanding that this is for you BOTH, and she doesn’t seem to be following to what, it appears, you both agreed to. I do see you making attempts (maybe not successfully or even maturely) to give her opportunities to get back to your agreements. Also, I don’t subscribe to the myth that once a woman gets into this scene that she is not in control of her mind or body. “Once the genie is out of the bottle…can’t control everything…” and all that is wrong, in my opinion. Everyone has control unless there is something mentally wrong. They CHOOSE to do what they do.
Don’t let the folks on here get you down. This is your and your wife’s marriage. You have a say as equally as she does.

[parklife]

When I saw the title I assumed it was something in the vein of play, where she was on board with being "punished". But you're serious, and seriously butthurt. Honestly, you sound like a spoiled, entitled child.

My opinion? You should tell her that you've thought long and hard and realize now what a buzzkill and burden it must be on a woman when she has to constantly think about entertaining her husband with pictures, and that it detracts from her being "in the moment" with the other man on her adventures.

Suck it up, watch some porn if you must, and let her own her own body and sexuality.

This x100….


The fact that you went thru all this… after having the same experience a year ago and you want to claim to be distraught and then after your talk the solution is “sexy challenges / punishments” makes me not take it seriously. It’s like you brought tiddly winks to a chess game and your child was is showing.

If you really have issues…. Sexy punishments and challenges doesn’t cut it.

[hornedhubby]

I'm empathetic to the OP for this reason. He was prepared for a stag with hotwife experience. What he got was a hard-core cuckold experience.

Feeling ignored generates poisonous emotions and insecurities. I blame the FB, too. Especially with the bareback ejaculations, he went out of bounds and, perhaps, contributed to the secrecy of the weekend. Not what the OP wanted at all.

At the same time, if you want your wife to enjoy being a hotwife, it's better to be willing to let her fly like a bird, rather than wanting to fly her like a kite on a string. And if you can't do that as a hubby, allowing her weekend fuck fests is not a great idea.

No offense. YMVV. Hope you two can figure it out.

[Aussiem]

I thought this thread was going to be about what to do to your wife when she has been very naughty and arrives home with a pussy full of cum. My thoughts turned to a bit of light BDSM. Perhaps the good old tenz machine. With a pad on her butt and one on mine, then as my cock or tongue slides into her pussy we get some light shocks. Or maybe blindfold her and tie her to the bed and brng in some friend to play guess who is fucking you.

[Parsifal]

f you want your wife to enjoy being a hotwife, it's better to be willing to let her fly like a bird, rather than wanting to fly her like a kite on a string.

I like this as a stand alone aphorism. One line truths are little gold nuggets. The context you put it in was nice too. I especially share in the empathy with which you led it off.

[bbarnsworth]

There's a number of people responding here telling you to suck it up and deal with it. The problem with that is that you didn't go into this wanting to be a cuckold, and your wife went into this with the understanding that you were not going to be a cuckold. She is making you a cuckold.

You agree to rules, and they've been violated. The rules were violated last year as well. You are hurt and upset. You said the two of you had a discussion about how to overcome this. It's really pretty simple; she follows the rules she agreed to. But, she's not going to follow the rules you agreed to, so there's no overcoming this. As a result, there are two options:

1. Accept that you are a cuckold. Expect that she will not do what you ask of her. Expect to be humiliated, expect to be ignored. Expect she might get pregnant from a boyfriend. Expect that reclaiming sex isn't a thing, and you can't claim her anyway. Expect that she won't stop fucking her boyfriends even if you ask her to. There are people on this forum (some of whom posted above) who would absolutely love this scenario and think you should thank your lucky stars it's happening to you. So, you can go along with that and be the perfect cuckold.

-or-

2. Do not accept the role of a cuckold. Go find a good family law attorney, do so without her knowledge for now, and start planning on how to get out of this marriage as intact as possible.

There really isn't middle ground here. What you're wanting is for her to follow the rules, to not be a cuckold, when she is clearly making you a cuckold and has no interest in doing otherwise. So, you're wanting to not be a cuckold while you're a cuckold. Your call. Either way, you're fucked.

[hornedhubby]

Disagree, but bbarnsworth is entitled to his opinion. I don't discount his conclusions. But I will try to counterpoint them.

I don't think the choice is that stark, nor is the situation that hopeless. There is space to renegotiate.

I'd suggest the OP's wife only play for hours at a time, not days, and in places close enough to return each night.

[54321]

In a successful negotiation, both walk away from the table happy. Both have compromised and both have their needs met.
A successful relationship of any kind requires negotiation. are you two able to negotiate in other areas of your relationship?

This is not a hotwifing issue. It's a relationship issue.

Best wishes,

54321

[SammySigns]

Did she say why she didn't send any videos? Has she ever?

[bradisalpha]

Wow !! A woman has different sexual arousal processes than a man. Sometimes it isn’t enough to just fuck someone. They might need flirting and mental foreplay to lead up to sex… being with someone in a vanilla situation to let her desires build. I am not sure you can expect her to follow the same arousal as yourself which most of the time with a man is pretty much instant.. look, touch, fuck !!!

Once she has been willing to proceed and fuck another man to satisfy you, she might have to do it her way. The result is the same. Does she really deserve to be punished because she isn’t doing it the way you want ?? I don’t think so. I think you should appreciate her efforts and praise her for doing something out of the ordinary to please you, and encourage her as you share her excitement and progress.

How would you feel if you were told to fuck someone but you could not do it at the drop of a hat. Would you want to be punished for not being able to do it exactly the way you are told ?? There are a lot emotions involved in sexual arousal and if these emotions were taken away you would not ever do it again !! If she feels the same way after you punish her, she may never do it again either. Is that what you want ??? Are you willing to give up having a hot wife because she did not follow your rules in detail ?? She is not a robot.

If she never does it again now, I actually wouldn’t blame her.

Just my thoughts…

Brad