Denied. Measured. Caged & In Love.

[commander]

This lifestyle grows easier with age and wisdom. In the early years of my marriage, I subconsciously felt like my wife was "mine."

Everything shifted the first time she was with another man in front of me, about two years in. It went incredibly well... so well that it shattered my confidence. Though I was taller, he was bigger in other ways and held a command over her that I never had. An intense, raw sexual connection.

Our sex life was always good, practical even. Frequent, comfortable. I got the wife, the mom, the best friend. But for him, she wore special things... did her makeup and hair in ways I’d never seen before.

The first hint of denial came when she’d gotten ready and he was on his way over. I tried to kiss her, to start something. She kissed me, but delicately, carefully... not wanting to mess up her lipstick. It stung. I wanted all of her, but she saved a part for him.

Sex with him was something I thought only happened in fantasies. That night, I first questioned my own performance.

After several nights of being with him in front of me, she hesitantly revealed while showering that she wanted to be with him alone. Where the hesitant kiss stung a little, this tore through me.

I agreed, almost breathlessly. The first night they were alone, I walked away for an hour.

When I returned, it was clear they’d been together... both satisfied. I craved her desperately, but her body language said she was done for now.

Then they started again, without me. While he was going hard, she noticed me alone and reached out to touch me. But distracted by him, she barely did. Eventually, she let go.

He finished inside her, then kept stroking, pushing his cum all around her, making a mess. It was like his way of marking her, right in front of me.

At that moment, I felt insignificant. Replaced even. But as she recovered, she seemed to want to do something for me... something from a fantasy I’d shared. Delivered at the worst possible time.

This wasn’t mentally enjoyable. Physically, I craved any contact with her. But mentally, I was breaking. She was... and is... the love of my life.

She made me get down on the bed and sat forcefully on my face. I’d fantasized about this, but never at a moment when I felt so small, so rejected. It was wetter, messier, dirtier than I imagined.

Yet I desired her so much that I began licking, and she ground into me hard. An absolute mess. Then the worst: her boyfriend laughed and said, “Eww,” making her laugh too.

There she was... looking amazing, grinding on my face. I looked up at her large breasts hanging down, thinking of his large cock, and my own feeling so sad and small.

They giggled together while I lapped with a breaking heart.

She pushed on my face hard... mouth and nose so I could barely breathe... and I just kept licking.

That was all I got.

He was just getting hard again, and she was back down on him.

Denial was clear... she’d barely gone down on me since the first couple of months, but with him, every time. And with a show of submission that I never saw from her.

I began to really feel the size difference. When she went down on him, it wasn’t about his pleasure or even hers. She was getting him as hard as possible so he could fuck her again.

I’m not well endowed... less so than I’d realized. I get hard instantly, easily. He was large and required more work.

She did it perfectly, making a show: eye contact, submissive, licking, sucking, touching. Preparing him.

Then they had sex again. On those nights, it was all about him. I got some but it was unresponsive, like she was just lying there, allowing me. Not into it. Once I was done, she was back with him at full force.

Sure, I was inside her, but denied her passion, which was exclusively his.

I ached for her... not just sex, but her focus. During those months, she was almost entirely focused on him.

The next part sounds unreal, but it’s true. It’s hot to think about now but it nearly broke us.

One evening after the kids were asleep, she called my name. Unbuckled my pants and pulled them down. I thought this was it... I was finally hers again.

She touched me, got me hard, then pulled out a ruler.

I instantly knew. This wasn’t about sex... she was measuring me.

Desperate for her touch, I went along. Hard and dripping precum.

With him? She’d lick that off. Me? She wiped it away.

Then came the soft measuring tape. I always thought I was average... around five inches. But I never measured.

Measured fully erect, I was just under four inches. She laughed and moved on.

Then she went back to texting... the boyfriend. Apparently, he was on a penis size forum where stats were shared. She sent him my measurements. Length, circumference.

They calculated volume... In terms of volume he filled her up something around 4 times more than I did.

I was crushed by my own inadequacy, knowing they compared and laughed at the numbers.

At that point, I was denied not just sex, but interest, and love. It blew up spectacularly. I was crushed, fundamentally changed.

We barely survived it.

But here we are over a decade later, and things are better than ever. I no longer feel like I “own” her. She’s not “mine”... I’m hers.

I learned that by focusing on her needs, putting mine second, doing whatever she wants, whenever she wants, as husband and friend... I got the physical relationship I always craved.

It’s not the raw passion she had with him, but it’s functional, hot, frequent, and fun. I’m older, more mature, and I handle this lifestyle better now.

After the blowup, she saw him a couple more times, with my encouragement. She had sex with 5–7 men besides me since then (some are secrets?) ... But it’s been a decade since.

Today I remain in a chastity cage. She got frustrated that I couldn’t come quickly or easily, so masturbation is forbidden.

At first I thought she was joking. After sex one night, when she came quickly, I rolled off respectfully and tried to finish quietly after.

She slapped my hand. I thought it was playful, but the next slap was harder. She stopped me. I’m only allowed to cum inside her.

I’m caged during the day, saving myself for her... And then I remove it at night so we can have sex whenever she desires. Which thankfully is frequent.

This works for us. For months now, ever since going into daytime chastity, sex has been as frequent as when we first met.

Now my small penis size is out in the open. She doesn’t pretend it’s anything else. My cuckolding desire is known and accepted. She jokes that “I’m a little gay.” I just blush and show her videos of large cocks I'd like to watch her with. She jokes that I'm more into large cocks than she is, and she knows I hope one day to share one with her.

It’s been a decade, but she recently said we might go back to the sex club. When we went before, a decade ago, she was with four men that night besides me. And I was denied again: She was too tired and sore afterward to keep going.

Something about the way I'm wired -- her having sex with other men just made me want her more, and forever. I still get excited about her the way I did when I first met her. Love, adoration, fascination.

I’ve eroticized denial. If she doesn’t want sex, I accept it. I cuddle and think about my small penis, her large breasts, how she deserves a man with a large cock... one who can fuck her properly in ways I can’t. I don't feel bad about this, I get excited and save it for when we have sex again.

And when we do, I always feel like I'm the luckiest man alive to have her. To be inside her. We've been together two decades and I still feel like, "Wow, I can't believe this is happening."

She recently said sex with me is like Olive Garden... and its Tiramisu. Reliable, all she needs most of the time. But sometimes she craves a rare, interesting dish. Something expensive. Something special.

I know my place. I’m her husband. I serve her needs. She takes care of me and our children. We’re best friends with a successful marriage, in love even.

But that animalistic, intense sex... she submits to that only for a bigger, stronger man without the burden of familiarity.

She joked that the problem is we're both submissive. We need to find someone who is more dominant, who understands her needs and will tolerate mine.

It’s been a decade, but now there’s talk it might happen soon. This time won't be so turbulent because I'm older and more mature. I accept who I am and like it.

I’m grateful for her denials, her acceptance, and her touch. I will spend the rest of my life serving her.

I love her with all my heart, body, and mind... And every denial just builds up an intensity for when we are together next.

[Tryagain]

Great account. Join the rest of us here who were initially crushed watching their wives go crazy over some guy's big cock!

[venus-can99]

Very nicely written commander. Do you have a say in picking her lovers ?

[coastalkid]

I was crushed by my own inadequacy, knowing they compared and laughed at the numbers.

At that point, I was denied not just sex, but interest, and love. It blew up spectacularly. I was crushed, fundamentally changed.

We barely survived it.

What was this time like for you? Did your wife do anything to help you with how you felt? The whole measurement thing and the laughing had to be an intense experience. Was that too much for you? Would you enjoy being embarrassed/humiliated like that again?

It’s been a decade, but now there’s talk it might happen soon. This time won't be so turbulent because I'm older and more mature. I accept who I am and like it.

I’m grateful for her denials, her acceptance, and her touch. I will spend the rest of my life serving her.

I love her with all my heart, body, and mind... And every denial just builds up an intensity for when we are together next.

You found a way to stay together. It must have taken some serious talks to get there. Has it been 10 years since she's had a lover? You say that you're older and more mature now, is your wife also more mature? I realize that your wife is older too but is she wiser? Can she help avoid the turbulence or do you need her to find ways to make it more turbulent to satisfy your need for your kink?

The part I highlighted in red is important to me because it suggests that your aren't on some kind of permanent denial. How do you feel about the idea of being permanently denied?

[handye12]

Well explained Commander, obviously a testing time for you. I'm pleased you got through it.
Yet while reading your account, I couldn't help but feel, "you are so right! AND it feels great doesn't it

Well done