coastalkid wrote: Fri Feb 27, 2026 8:00 am
It's hard to imagine that anyone gets through this life with no issues or drama, whether you are in the lifestyle or not. I'm sure some manage to. What has been your most challenging issue that you have, or have had, to deal with as a couple? I know that people are different and not everything applies to everyone. I'm asking about YOUR personal experience. Of all the things that have been any kind of trouble for you, what is yours (or was yours)?
Coastalkid,
I agree, life is wild and always brings challenges, we can view them as positives or negatives but regardless they’ll be around sooner or later.
Speaking within the lifestyle challenges that life brings: I guess the hardest challenge for us (C & I), that we have had to deal with, would be how flaky men are. We put so much effort into finding men so I can sleep with…..only to get ghosted or let down. It happens quite often, and it also happens quite often that men in the LS have difficulty staying hard or fucking with condoms on.
As a couple, between us in our marriage, I would say a challenge would be learning to balance it all. But tbh, balancing life is a challenge anyhow haha.
-Lexi
Un día a la vez.
Time can be your best friend, or your worse enemy.
I love my husband.
Speaking within the lifestyle challenges that life brings: I guess the hardest challenge for us (C & I), that we have had to deal with, would be how flaky men are. We put so much effort into finding men so I can sleep with…..only to get ghosted or let down. It happens quite often, and it also happens quite often that men in the LS have difficulty staying hard or fucking with condoms on.
Hi there, I introduced the hotwifing concept 4 months ago and at the begining my wife said no. After a lot of talks, she became curious about it and want to give it a try but we want to be very discreet about it. So using a dating site requiring a picture is an issue. Do you have any other way for my wife to go for a date? Thanks for your help.
Slai75 wrote: Mon Mar 09, 2026 4:50 am
Hi there, I introduced the hotwifing concept 4 months ago and at the begining my wife said no. After a lot of talks, she became curious about it and want to give it a try but we want to be very discreet about it. So using a dating site requiring a picture is an issue. Do you have any other way for my wife to go for a date? Thanks for your help.
Slai75
Congrats on the progression. How fun! Most LS dating sites (specifically to the lifestyle) don’t require a pic but posting a pic is highly recommended. You can blur faces and only share one. Or crop the photos etc… there’s way to still be discreet while utilizing the internet. Don’t let the whole pic ordeal deter you away from taking advantage of the great resource of the internet. A quick google search would open your world to the varieties of LS connection sites. For example: SDC has been a great resource for us.
Other ways include just going out and hopefully meeting people who agree to your offer lol.
There are specific lifestyle clubs as well. Where people meet and can play if they want to. Have to google that for your area.
Finding connections to attend LS house parties is a great way to meet people (from what I hear). But mostly those connections can be found online on LS sites.
Those are my suggestions, I’m sure there are other suggestions that could be helpful by other hotwives.
Good luck either way! And congrats again.
-Lex
Un día a la vez.
Time can be your best friend, or your worse enemy.
I love my husband.
Question: How does a hotwife not look down on her husband after being with, or regularly fucking another guy who is not her husband? I know that is part of the kink for some people, that the husband being degraded is a huge turn on for both the hubby and the hotwife. But if humiliation is not your thing, and you still desire and have regular sex, how does the wife not look at her husband as inferior in some way after riding another guy?
For context, we've never taken the leap. I have no problem pleasing her, but the curiosity kink is there for both of us. She has only had two past lovers before me. We trust one another, communicate great, and all that, and I would see myself as more of a stag. Just unsure about the answer to my questions and would like to hear other's perspective.
blackmann33 wrote: Wed Apr 01, 2026 2:13 pm
Question: How does a hotwife not look down on her husband after being with, or regularly fucking another guy who is not her husband? I know that is part of the kink for some people, that the husband being degraded is a huge turn on for both the hubby and the hotwife. But if humiliation is not your thing, and you still desire and have regular sex, how does the wife not look at her husband as inferior in some way after riding another guy?
For context, we've never taken the leap. I have no problem pleasing her, but the curiosity kink is there for both of us. She has only had two past lovers before me. We trust one another, communicate great, and all that, and I would see myself as more of a stag. Just unsure about the answer to my questions and would like to hear other's perspective.
I'm a cuck husband. We started out as swingers. I never looked down on my wife when I was fucking other women. Why would she look down on me?
Hello HWs!
So for about a year now I have been throwing the idea to my wife about becoming a hotwife. For the most part our talks have been positive but she wants to read about couples first time experiences. The good and the bad ones and why they were that way. If I’m in the wrong thread or if there is a better one I can ask in just let me know I’ll delete this one. Thank you.
Hi. New member here. I'm curious how many hotwives have sexual things they do with their paramours and dalliances, but which they aren't really interested in doing with their husband/boyfriend. I'm not talking about husbands who have a denial or humiliation kink. Your husband is a stag but there are things you don't really like to do it at home. Maybe you only enjoy making love to your husband, and thrill to a wild fucking with your bulls. Or you reserve anal for your paramours, husband is pussy only. Or for some reason you won't allow your husband to come in your mouth, but love it when other men do so. And if so, do you know why you prefer to keep some things outside your marriage?
Unexpired-soul wrote: Thu Apr 02, 2026 1:47 pm
Hello HWs!
So for about a year now I have been throwing the idea to my wife about becoming a hotwife. For the most part our talks have been positive but she wants to read about couples first time experiences. The good and the bad ones and why they were that way....]
Hello, there are several threads in this forum that share exactly that, the journeys of some hotwife couples from the very beginning. Hopefully by now you've been able to read some of them as they are very insightful!
Theosteve99 wrote: Tue Apr 14, 2026 2:24 pm
Hi. New member here. I'm curious how many hotwives have sexual things they do with their paramours and dalliances, but which they aren't really interested in doing with their husband/boyfriend....]
Sorry you haven't gotten any answers yet, I didn't respond because I can't personally relate. It's the opposite for me really, there are things I do with my husband that I don't do yet with any thirds. I have years upon years of trust built up with him so we do some pretty kinky stuff. So far I haven't gotten to a place of intimacy like that with other men. All the things I like to do, I like to do them with the love of my life since we have a very robust sex life together. I'm sure there are other dynamics out there like what you're describing, but I thought I'd post anyway. I figure that kind of dynamic could come about because maybe the wife likes an act that the husband doesn't want to do or can't do? Just guessing.
Okay, I have a question that I would like answered by a hotwife. My wife finds the prospect of getting laid by someone who’s not me in occasion interesting. Although I have been lucky enough to watch her with others a few times she always states up front that having her husband there feels weird and she’d rather go alone. However every time I have been there to witness it she always has a good time, the sex is good and doesn’t seem uncomfortable about me there at all. This leads me to my question, were any of you hotwives the same as how I described my wife but later after being with men alone discovered that they really missed having their husbands there and switched where that was their new norm? I realize this depends on the person but was interested to know if this change of mind ever occurred to a hotwife and if they were surprised at the change themselves when it happened.
Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about - Winston Churchill
Okay, I have a question that I would like answered by a hotwife. My wife finds the prospect of getting laid by someone who’s not me in occasion interesting. Although I have been lucky enough to watch her with others a few times she always states up front that having her husband there feels weird and she’d rather go alone. However every time I have been there to witness it she always has a good time, the sex is good and doesn’t seem uncomfortable about me there at all. This leads me to my question, were any of you hotwives the same as how I described my wife but later after being with men alone discovered that they really missed having their husbands there and switched where that was their new norm? I realize this depends on the person but was interested to know if this change of mind ever occurred to a hotwife and if they were surprised at the change themselves when it happened.
Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about - Winston Churchill
I prefer to meet men alone. With my husband there I feel like there are 2 guys I have to please, the other guy physically and my husband performatively. Sometimes I want my husband there but that is more about me being dominant. Speaking from a purely sexual perspective, I enjoy myself better not having him there,
HotwifeBabs wrote: Sat May 30, 2026 6:23 am
I prefer to meet men alone. With my husband there I feel like there are 2 guys I have to please, the other guy physically and my husband performatively. Sometimes I want my husband there but that is more about me being dominant. Speaking from a purely sexual perspective, I enjoy myself better not having him there,
In my opinion there’s nothing wrong with your preference, in fact it’s hot.
What I was curious about is if any hotwife “thought” like you have described in your response but over some time realized there was something missing and going forward changed her preference to having him there at least most of the time.
Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about - Winston Churchill
Been dreaming of my wife becoming a hotwife. She deserves to be satisfied more than i am able to perform. With age comes a slight difficulty in maintaining for her as long and as often as she wants. I see alot of marraiges suffer due to the wife not wanting sex as often as the husband but def not our problem. She would have sex everyday if she could if i was able to perform. She has never asked or hinted about others which is great for me/us but has recently been inquiring to get breast implants. She is very attractive and def a milf as is but with implants will def get alot more looks and prob advances. I have no readon to doubt her intensions other than to feel better about herself being 49 yrs old 2 adult kids the fun bags could def use a lift.
Now with us looking to seriously look into her implants a whole new set of adventures awaits. Im hoping with a boost of her self esteme coupled with being desired more by other men may open the door to accepting those advances fulfilling her needs more than i can provide.
Has anyone has thier wife get implants that lead to a lifestyle change for the better or worse? Dont get me wrong i have no intention of sleeping with other women i just want her to be satisfied like she deserves and i will never stop loving her. Thanks yall.
Looking for a hotwife’s perspective on this. I previously posted the initial story in the Wannabe forum, but since got some updates. For context, my wife and I have been together 9 years and married 7 months.
On a long car ride I was driving while my wife handled music on my phone. She saw I listened to a hotwife podcast. She brought it up, and giggled saying “I didn’t know.” She was then extra affectionate that night and the next morning. The following night she seemed sad, and into the day after. The following evening she approached me to talk about it saying it made her uncomfortable. I assured her it was erotica and I am not a swinger. She then became affectionate again. Interestingly, she went to church for the first time in months that weekend.
I feel I dropped the ball here on ever broaching the subject again. Our communication has always been great, I’ve just been fine with this as my private fantasy I didn’t need to act on. However, with thoughts on eventually raising it this isn’t necessarily how I would have done it.
My wife is working abroad this week. We have had progressive fantasy play for over a decade and just turned 40. Over the past year she has been working on her body and focused on her looks. I think she looks fantastic. The best she ever has. She has been actively ogling other men which is progress for us. Today she sent me a picture of a hot guy on her train and said if she had more confidence in herself she would have used her hall pass.
She is beautiful, she thinks I’m biased and she won’t let me post pictures to get additional opinions. Any wives here have advice on how I can help her with her insecurities?
Do any of you Hot Wives practice ANY type of humiliation? If you do, is that easy for you to do? I know I've read there are some men that crave it and their wives don't really want to do it because they don't want to do anything that would hurt their husband or that they just don't "have it in themselves" to be that way (ie not in their character). If you do practice humiliation do you have to continually escalate things because other humiliations have lost their potency? Like if a wife has been a Hot Wife for over let's say two years, telling her husband not to wait up for her and she may not come home might not carry the weight it once did the first few times. Is teasing just a less extreme form of humiliation?
If you don't practice humiliation or if you simply don't like it, it would also be nice to know why you don't like it or like doing it.
Hope is not a strategy but it's still good to have! Especially if you don't have a strategy!
I get my denial the old fashion way, I married vanilla!
I am curious to know how hotwives deal with the feeling of being objectified by their husbands. The common things you read about when the husbands first open up about their kink are:
You can’t love me.
You want to be with other women.
You should be ashamed to have such thoughts.
Are you testing me?
Are you trying to get rid of me?
But still another is, “I don’t take kindly to being objectified”. This is a complicated one because of its nature for clearly most men have as one of their reasons of doing this is the anticipation of how incredibly sexy would their wife look doing such a thing. If this was a stand alone reason for wanting to see their wives with another it would indeed seem an objectifying request.
It is also true of course that for many husbands that is only just one facet of many. Others may be wanting to further fulfill her life, give her something he isn’t capable of giving, wanting to spice up or maintain the spiciness of their sex life, allowing for the actualizing of fantasies, and allowing for more variety.
So the questions for the hotwives here are:
Do you feel objectified?
Is being objectified always a negative part or is it by some positive?
Is it important that you draw a distinction between being objectified and weighing that against his other reasons?
I believe this is an interesting question because although I can understand why a woman wouldn’t want to feel objectified by her husband, objectifying his wife in this manner translates into an actual compliment because you are such a turn on for him this could be the pinnacle for him to see you as a sort of sex diva for him.
Looking forward to your feedback!
Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about - Winston Churchill
