New to the site again….

[B+J87]

Hello

This is the second time I have been a part of this site. I have been away from the site for so long. I had forgotten my original information to login. I have since created this new login. I remember the best thing about this site being the bulletin board eccentric nature of it. It is not covered in gratuitous and endless pornography or advertisements. For the most part, the post seemed genuine. However, I do see some things where I think some guys are just playing out their fantasies by hooking everyone else into their posts.

The most important thing I ever got from this site was when I found out about a book called “the faithful, hot wife“. The book walks the couples through the cuckolding process without the wife, actually going through the physical action of having sex with another man. It was my hopes to use this as the Gateway towards getting her to really do it. We both read the book. She liked the fact that it got us together closer and the fact that it improved our sex life. Things were going along pretty well. We were role-playing and also doing some of the minor challenges. Not long after we had started she lost her father. Just put the brakes on our sex life and needless to say the path towards cuckolding. It has been about a year now and our sex. Life is pretty much nothing. I am working towards getting her back into sex with us in general. She is in full menopause and it is difficult. It is my hopes to rekindle our sex life and eventually start working towards the cuckolding that I desire. However, I want her to desire it as much as I do. Hopefully both of these things can happen. In the meantime, I will keep trying, and I will be reading posts on the site, seeking advice and reading and learning.

[armyguyot1]

Welcome back to the forum B+j87. Menopause can be wonderful if they take the right course. That is wanting sex as it is no longer a possibility of getting pregnant and no longer have to be a Mommie so lets fuck while we can. My wife is that route.

[B+J87]

Thanks. I just have to get her warmed up again. It’s tough sometimes. Shot down or she is dry or in pain. I turned to porn as a primary and having trouble getting back to reality.

[MartasBoy]

Hello

This is the second time I have been a part of this site. I have been away from the site for so long.......

Our sex life is pretty much nothing. She is in full menopause and it is difficult. It is my hopes to rekindle our sex life

Menopause is difficult. Someone else posted above, that after menopause can bring more freedom and better sex. It unfortunately is often associated with a significant change in hormonal activity resulting in a sometimes complete loss of libido. Post menopausal women often experience a loss of arousal, affecting their ability to provide lubrication in their vagina, and loss of dilation. In the worst case, sex can then become uncomfortable or painful.

Just the loss of libido, the basic sexual interest, makes it difficult. Once we lose our hormone fueled libido, getting interested in sex can be a little like having to force yourself to eat a second Thanksgiving meal, at your parents' house, after you just had a full Thanksgiving meal at your in-laws' house. It's hard to force yourself to eat when you're not hungry. Sex after a woman's libido has tanked to zero, is a lot like that.
Some wives are kind enough to keep trying, but it's hard. It's more like she has to put a note on her calendar, "Have sex with my husband."

Hormone replacement therapy can help. And many women have to use more lubricant to keep it from being uncomfortable or painful. It also takes a lot more effort on the husband's part, to take his time, and attend to lots of romantic activity in foreplay, to get that mood back.

Some women may even develop vaginismus after menopause, a condition in which their vaginal canal tightens up, out of anxiety and apprehension about sex.

And, it affects every woman in very different ways. The women who have a total loss of libido, and experience a lack of lubrication and dilation, get really tired of the women who tell them how wonderful sex was for them, after they went through menopause. They are not all the same.

[B+J87]

Thanks for the insight and empathy. Yes, she checks all boxes. There are times where she says she is interested but it is likely out of concern that I will stray. During those times it is treated as a scheduled event about how on Saturday date night we can maybe “be intimate”. That phrase and “don’t get started” are the worst in the English language. Not sure about you but hearing the word “intimate” is not a turn on for me. I suspect that is the case for many men. Not saying she should speak nasty or something but some innuendo or something that doesn’t sound like it came from the Life Time channel would work. I have spoken with her about that and it kinda got better.

I think she just doesn’t want to admit or have me think I will never have sex again. I was 53 the last time. I love her to no end so that’s not the issue. I mean, I’m hear because I wanted to see her pleasure increase. I will also say, she has done things to try such as creams and talking with OBGYN. I don’t blame her by any means. How could I? I consider myself lucky to have her in anyway possible. Our marriage is very strong. Enough to explore the cuckold Hotwife experience. We just started too late.


Anyway. Just responding to the post. Didn’t want to sound like I’m whining, complaining or being a victim.

I know this got everyone who read this hot and worked up. “Don’t get started” and go be “intimate” with a wife or Bull. I’m pulling for all you pervs and will be reading about your experiences with forearms like Popeye.

[Funtx4u]

Cannot recommend HRT enough. Total game changer !

[coastalkid]

Cannot recommend HRT enough. Total game changer !

Welcome to the forum Funtx4u!

I wish my wife would be more open minded about HRT. She is reluctant to even discuss the topic. I've tried but when she uncharacteristically shuts the idea down it shows how strong her feelings are regarding it. I tried avoiding the sexual implications and focused on the health part (ie hot flashes and night sweats, the stuff I know she struggles with) to see if that might open her mind to the benefits. I got nothing but resistance and a closed mind. It's a dead subject and a non-starter.

[DevotedScholar]

... a book called “the faithful, hot wife“.

Is it The Faithful Hotwife by Jessica Blair (The Hotwife Institute)? Regardless, I'm gonna add this to my library

For any female focused relationships, like cuckolding or hotwifing, the woman's desire is at centre. Age and grief complicates things, but why not plan a date, or any romantic getaway that feels natural to both of you. Giving space is good, but to make progress you need to slowly add heat, bring the pot to simmer. After that, the bridge to this adventurous lifestyle is very short.

Welcome back! And wishing you the best

[coastalkid]

She is in full menopause and it is difficult. It is my hopes to rekindle our sex life and eventually start working towards the cuckolding that I desire. However, I want her to desire it as much as I do. Hopefully both of these things can happen. In the meantime, I will keep trying, and I will be reading posts on the site, seeking advice and reading and learning.

We barely survived what I call "The Three Horsemen of the Marital Apocalypse", a strict conservative Christian upbringing, Post-Partum depression, and Menopause. I've spent decades fighting those demons. I admit I fought those battles inadequately prepared. I was naive, immature and blinded by lust. We lost a lot of precious time and we didn't really listen to each other. Fortunately we are in a much better place now. She's not a hot wife but she understands why I think the idea is kinky/exciting.

Menopause and realizing your age can be tough to overcome. Those things are powerful distractions and not in positive ways. It makes you feel unattractive. That's not so dissimilar to what an aging man deals with the onset of erectile dysfunction. It has a way of amplifying your insecurities and suppressing your desire to ignore them. I'm bald. I'm too fat. My dick is too small. It's really no different than what wives deal with.

I suppose if you really want the cuckold experience you can start by devoting yourself to her without focusing on the sex. If you know that your "little comments" and your eagerness to discuss it bothers her, then as her future cuckold you would naturally curtail putting that pressure on her. Once she recognizes and believes that you only want her happiness she can set aside some or maybe all of her issues. Who knows and besides what else can you do anyway?