When your wife's lover wants to be alone with her

[andrew1]

Over the years I have had experiences where my wife's lovers have asked me if they could spend some time alone with her. This was typically a nerve-wracking situation for me, especially if I was looking forward to watching them make love, or at least being able to listen from another room.

One of her younger boyfriends in the past became a bit too arrogant after he had fucked my wife several times in front of me, and then wanted privacy with her whenever they would meet up on future dates. This involved having me drop her off at his place, or going out for a few hours so they could have fun in our bedroom without any distractions.

I have to admit that driving around, or nursing a beer at a local bar, while your wife is getting fucked is a major turn-on and in some ways even better than watching. It's just that losing control of the decision to be present or not is very difficult, and causes a lot of angst, especially the first few times it happens.

I would like to hear from other husbands and how they felt when their wives and lovers expressed a desire to make love in private. Especially when it was a new concept in their relationship, after being able to watch and listen in the beginning. And was your reaction different when it was the boyfriend who told you that he wanted to be alone with your wife ?

[Thebestdays1]

For about a year, back when we were married, my wife was fucking a married colleague of hers. He used to tell his wife he was working overtime on a Friday night and as they were both working on the nightshift, they'd both work until 1AM then come back to our place to fuck downstairs. I met him very briefly when he first came round but he was obviously very nervous. She'd told him I was totally okay with them being together but she'd added that I was hoping we could have a threesome one day. He wasn't ready for that and during his first 2 stays at our place he found it hard to completely relax. To reassure him that I wasn't going to burst into the living room, naked, I fixed a small bolt to the living room door so they could lock it to make him feel more relaxed and it worked. We'd tell people that it was to keep our dog in the living room whilst she slept off nights whenever they noticed it.

[KernowChap]

For us, it has been my wife who has voiced wanting time alone with her lover, and indeed, she did have time with both her long time previous lovers.

'Time' was sometimes just an hour upstairs alone in bed before I'd be invited up, and sometimes it would be whole nights away with him. But, it's important for the HW to feel she is in control, and as some of you may have gathered from previous threads, I love the thought of my wife getting very close, emotionally, to her lovers anyway and it's hotter when my wife asks for the time rather than the lover.

[MarknSusan]

In our experiences over many years; Susan playing solo with a guy is just another type of experience. Her preference is MFM and shes really good at keeping both me and the other guy equally involved.

However, we learned that some guys are just not comfortable with me there and/or cannot perform unless it’s just the two of them. Although Susan and I both enjoy MFM I have learned that with solo experiences, not knowing what they are doing, and then waiting for her to tell me what happened has its own unique and exciting experience too.

[DCaftermath]

Obviously there are many couples that never let it happen alone. Either it’s the husband insisting his presence, or the wife feels more secure with her husband there, and or it makes it even hotter for her to have her husband see her like that. Sometimes it is a commitment between them both, a way to keep it still more about their sex than the sex she has with the guy.

There’s no doubt that the husband’s presence brings along hurtles of its own. Is she able to let go and have the same organic sex that she would had she been alone with the guy? I would like to think so, or at least from my experience, when I felt that my wife was inhibited by my presence and in the same bliss had she’d been in my absence made for the richest moments.

Then there’s what having the husband there does to the third. As rough and tough, manly and ready to engage as men are, their kryptonite is anything that kills a raging boner. Two sets of eyes focused on his performance can be more pressure on his game. What if this dude touches my balls when I am distracted in his wife? Shit this guy is packing, why didn’t she tell me her husband was hung? He knows so much more about this woman than do I, he’ll see any inadequacies I have.

I think being together as a couple is the safest route. However there are lots of obstacles, feelings and fears that keep that concept possible. Although it’s possible, it for sure makes it more challenging to accomplish and may eliminate a fair amount of otherwise interesting candidates.

How did I feel when my wife told me she’d found a guy that she would be alone with? I felt elated to be honest. I also felt that angst knocking. I wanted to be as much a part of it as I could. I paid for her hair to be done as well as a manicure and pedicure. I drove her a half hour to a meeting place where I let her out and watched her walk to the cafe they were meeting at. That image, or mental video image, sticks with me still as I watched her walk away with a short leopard club dress, and a small black clutch that had a fistful of condoms I had placed in it. Her pretty ass doing shit to that silky fabric of that dress that made me want her, made me ask, “ what the hell am I doing?” I understood his side, they had worked together and they had flirted a lot. He saw the same things in her that I do. I trusted her and although I didn’t know him he knew he was having my wife upon my approval. From the time I left that parking lot, to the time he brought her home at 5 in the morning, it was a mix of pain and arousal. Of all times that day she was having issues with charging her phone and as much as we tried we couldn’t get it to charge. The battery was so low that she dared not even to take any pictures for fear it would completely die. That was a miss, an unfortunate miss that I still wish I had seen and kept. It was rough, I’m glad she did it. When she finally arrived home and knocked at the door, I opened it and we fell into a hug. The change in my demeanor was straight up on a line graph.

My priority remains being there. There is nothing like it regardless of the difficulties it may cause. However if her being alone came again as an option I’d be in.

[LI_hotwife]

We have discussed and it’s something we may work towards. There’s a lot that comes with it and it’s got to be something that fills the needs of all involved.

[coastalkid]

We have discussed and it’s something we may work towards. There’s a lot that comes with it and it’s got to be something that fills the needs of all involved.

That's the tricky part isn't it? How do you make it fulfill the needs of EVERYONE if EVERYONE is not there? What have your discussions revealed to you?

[tony1954]

she will spend next week on the Gulf Island with her lover and looking forward to reclaiming her afterwards. He has a way with her that gives her earth shattering orgasms and being younger fucks her for hours.

[LI_hotwife]

We have discussed and it’s something we may work towards. There’s a lot that comes with it and it’s got to be something that fills the needs of all involved.

That's the tricky part isn't it? How do you make it fulfill the needs of EVERYONE if EVERYONE is not there? What have your discussions revealed to you?

That's where it's intimate and not something to share outside of the triad.

[LI_hotwife]

she will spend next week on the Gulf Island with her lover and looking forward to reclaiming her afterwards. He has a way with her that gives her earth shattering orgasms and being younger fucks her for hours.

Nice

[KentuckyTom17]

This can be a very difficult situation. There is a big difference between “just fucking” and spending intimate time with someone. It’s not really his called “Bull”it’s your and your wife’s. If you both agree fine. If you disagree then it might be time to find another Bull. Been there…

[mncouplemg]

We have had a few guys ask for alone time, I had to remind them that the sex he has with my wife isn't for his pleasure, the sex he has is for my wife and my pleasure, he is just a toy for us to use.

[DCaftermath]

I think I get what you’re trying to say but as worded doesn’t ring true to me. I would imagine the guy derives a great deal of pleasure having sex with your wife. He is looking for alone time in order to up his game, be able to deliver pleasure for her so she wants him again. More than likely you being there weighs on him to the point where he feels he can’t be his “full” self.

The sex he has with your wife is not of his convenience, not of his choosing. If allowed he should feel a great deal of gratitude to be considered, and ultimately chosen to be with her. If these men or this man have made it to the point to have such an opportunity, he should be fully aware of this pecking order. Him being a toy and playing within these boundaries can for sure go together.

Who wouldn’t want to bang a beautiful woman in privacy, but if that’s what’s he’s looking for he should get a traditional girlfriend and buy her valentine cards, not try to pretend he is calling the shots in someone else’s marriage. Is this hard for these guys?

[Wifewithothers]

We have been active with including others for 25+ years, started when we were dating in college, though she had a few group experiences before we even met.

We have gone back and forth over the years with her playing alone or not, but it's always been our decision. Ok yes the guy can say he isn't comfortable with me being there and back out, but he is not going to have a say in our decision.

Every couple has there own style of play that works for them so there is no right or wrong decision about playing alone.

U have waited at home, dropped her off, and sometimes only found out she was getting fucked when she got home and told me. Even had the pleasure of coming home to find her getting fucked (great experience I loved it).

[UkCuckHubby]

In our earlier it seemed to be natural progression, i would be involved initially, but as time went on and i guess boundaries are pushed they would want alone time with each other. She has played many times alone and i have never seen her current longterm fuck her, despite him probaly fucking her over 200 times.

[annsman]

A couple of my wife’s boyfriends enjoyed me watching or joining in, but we’ve generally found that them playing alone and then coming home to reconnect with me works best for all three of us.

[SalseroStag]

Well that is, as many things, a matter of personal tastes: my wife wants me to be there in way or another and so do I, our regular playmate has no problem at all with that. So we're all happy!