Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!

[jane]

what she said

[htm100]

Hi all you lovely hot wives,

My wife has been getting into the hot wife fantasy after being very prudish about it. She has a religious background. But latety she has started to really engage in the fantasy during sex. She admits that she is turned on by sex with black guys and we often act this out. If feels like the religious conditioning is fading and she is getting more and more turned on by it. I have told her that I’d be good if she wanted to do it and she knows I mean it, but has said no, because she would still feel a bit guilty. But she did ask - anyway, how would we find someone.

We are starting to listen to some hot wife erotica. I encourage her about how hot she is, how other guys want her, and she has upgraded her wardrobe to look more sexy. She is working hard on her body too. She had made jokes out of the blue about finding a black man when I am away (maybe she is testing my reaction?) and has even told me recently that she would like to go on holiday by herself, and asked if I would be okay with that. Thats the first time she has ever suggested that. She wants to go to a sexy, suave place by the beach where I know she could be picked up and seduced if she headed out to the bar. She is the kind of woman who likes to be in control and to choose what she wants.

Is this the signs of an emerging hot wife or am I seeing too much into this? I’m not sure she really would yet, but I think the idea is slowly working away in her, and she’d like to explore her freedom a little. What do you think, am I reading this right, is this part of teh process normally, and what should I do to respond? I am totally fine with it, and just work on making her feel safe to do it at the moment.

[DCaftermath]

Do women, after an orgasm, have any drop that is in any way equivalent to post nut clarity in men, or does the arousal just continue steady on?

I've heard some women say yes. But for me, no not at all. I have more clarity before an orgasm actually. After I cum, I feel like I'm drunk & and am more willing to do kinky things.

that!

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

Do women, after an orgasm, have any drop that is in any way equivalent to post nut clarity in men, or does the arousal just continue steady on?

I've heard some women say yes. But for me, no not at all. I have more clarity before an orgasm actually. After I cum, I feel like I'm drunk & and am more willing to do kinky things.

Same!

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

Does your husband ever get angry when he sees you kissing someone new in public? How do you deal with it?

Like what context? A new FB or a stranger? My husband is never upset at that

[Lovefeet]

Hello Dear Hotwifes and cuckolds,

I have a general question so sorry.

How can I realize a hotwife or cuckold person, how could I approach them to meet and know each other?

Sincerely,
Arda

[mcg73]

Hi, hotwives

Have you ever been mesmerized by a lover in some way? It didn’t have to be anything serious, but you felt a special connection and asked your husbands if you could keep exploring that?

[Jaydub1984]

Close your eyes and think of the most powerful sensation from your sex life. What was the deepest most primal side of yourself that was exploding out? What was it that brought it out of you?

[aboywithsmallballs]

Why would a vanilla woman gain an interest in the lifestyle? For context, I've had two longterm relationships where I opened up slowly after about 6 months and in both it just felt very awkward and like they weren't interested - which made it uninteresting for me too for a while. So, I'm wondering what turns a hotwife on about the lifestyle?

[Knightryder701]

I can’t get my wife to open up about her sexual fantasies. She reads romance novels so I believe she has a sexual imagination. Any suggestions how I might coax it out of her.

[Greg_N_Shelley]

I am hoping one of you ladies can assist me in understanding a situation that struck me as paradoxical. It doesn’t relate to hotwifing directly, but I know many ladies here have engaged in swinging and also experience jealousy. I’m hoping someone has some insight…

Many years ago when my wife and I first started with CNM, we tried same-room swapping a few times. We eventually decided we liked MFM threesomes better (she loved being the center of attention and I loved seeing her engaged with another guy), and that became our main recipe afterward. But the point for this immediate discussion: my wife has directly witnessed me have sex with another woman and it never provoked a jealous response.

Then I recently told her a story about a plane trip from the Middle East to the US that happened many years ago where I shared a spontaneous, 8-hour intimate connection with a woman who was seated next to me. Long story short, flirtation began shortly after we were seated and by the time we were over the Atlantic, sparks progressed into a warm and somewhat soulful vibe--sharing a blanket with the arm rest up and holding hands, and she was asleep on my shoulder. No kissing. Obviously, no sex. And when we arrived at baggage claim, she approached me curious about my layover, and I declined the invitation. I don’t even remember the woman’s name today.

And my wife was very upset about that story. I thought the statute of limitations on that event would have expired years ago! Lol

I can’t for the life of me understand this situation. Bear in mind, I am nearly devoid of jealousy, so jealous reactions often look a little weird and comical to me. But in this case, the circumstances were clearly benign and the physical intimacy I shared with this woman didn’t even reach middle school level.

Any insight, ladies?

[cuckcu]

I am hoping one of you ladies can assist me in understanding a situation that struck me as paradoxical. It doesn’t relate to hotwifing directly, but I know many ladies here have engaged in swinging and also experience jealousy. I’m hoping someone has some insight…

Many years ago when my wife and I first started with CNM, we tried same-room swapping a few times. We eventually decided we liked MFM threesomes better (she loved being the center of attention and I loved seeing her engaged with another guy), and that became our main recipe afterward. But the point for this immediate discussion: my wife has directly witnessed me have sex with another woman and it never provoked a jealous response.

Then I recently told her a story about a plane trip from the Middle East to the US that happened many years ago where I shared a spontaneous, 8-hour intimate connection with a woman who was seated next to me. Long story short, flirtation began shortly after we were seated and by the time we were over the Atlantic, sparks progressed into a warm and somewhat soulful vibe--sharing a blanket with the arm rest up and holding hands, and she was asleep on my shoulder. No kissing. Obviously, no sex. And when we arrived at baggage claim, she approached me curious about my layover, and I declined the invitation. I don’t even remember the woman’s name today.

And my wife was very upset about that story. I thought the statute of limitations on that event would have expired years ago! Lol

I can’t for the life of me understand this situation. Bear in mind, I am nearly devoid of jealousy, so jealous reactions often look a little weird and comical to me. But in this case, the circumstances were clearly benign and the physical intimacy I shared with this woman didn’t even reach middle school level.

Any insight, ladies?

I'm not a lady but what you did is a big fault. Such a thing can only be told, when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women

[Greg_N_Shelley]

I'm not a lady but what you did is a big fault. Such a thing can only be told, when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women

I've always been open and honest about these things. As for "when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women", I never did. There was no transgression as I see it, and she's known for years that I flirt with women. I've always been a very open guy when meeting people on the road and connect very easily when conditions are ripe. Nothing new there. But something about that particular event pushed her button.

"..what you did is a big fault" - How?

My monogamy agreement with her is about sex with other women. Not shared warmth on a plane with no further physical intimacy or future connection. It seems nonsensical considering her previous response to similar situations and my sex with other women during our swinging experiments.

The only crime I see at the moment was telling her about it.

[cuckcu]

I'm not a lady but what you did is a big fault. Such a thing can only be told, when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women

I've always been open and honest about these things. As for "when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women", I never did. There was no transgression as I see it, and she's known for years that I flirt with women. I've always been a very open guy when meeting people on the road and connect very easily when conditions are ripe. Nothing new there. But something about that particular event pushed her button.

"..what you did is a big fault" - How?

My monogamy agreement with her is about sex with other women. Not shared warmth on a plane with no further physical intimacy or future connection. It seems nonsensical considering her previous response to similar situations and my sex with other women during our swinging experiments.

The only crime I see at the moment was telling her about it.

I don’t know bro, but my intuition says that it could hurt her when you said, you held the hands of the woman on the airplane and shared a blanket. That’s emotional and that’s the thing. Maybe she does not want you to share this side with other women

[coastalkid]

I am hoping one of you ladies can assist me in understanding a situation that struck me as paradoxical. It doesn’t relate to hotwifing directly, but I know many ladies here have engaged in swinging and also experience jealousy. I’m hoping someone has some insight…

Many years ago when my wife and I first started with CNM, we tried same-room swapping a few times. We eventually decided we liked MFM threesomes better (she loved being the center of attention and I loved seeing her engaged with another guy), and that became our main recipe afterward. But the point for this immediate discussion: my wife has directly witnessed me have sex with another woman and it never provoked a jealous response.

Then I recently told her a story about a plane trip from the Middle East to the US that happened many years ago where I shared a spontaneous, 8-hour intimate connection with a woman who was seated next to me. Long story short, flirtation began shortly after we were seated and by the time we were over the Atlantic, sparks progressed into a warm and somewhat soulful vibe--sharing a blanket with the arm rest up and holding hands, and she was asleep on my shoulder. No kissing. Obviously, no sex. And when we arrived at baggage claim, she approached me curious about my layover, and I declined the invitation. I don’t even remember the woman’s name today.

And my wife was very upset about that story. I thought the statute of limitations on that event would have expired years ago! Lol

I can’t for the life of me understand this situation. Bear in mind, I am nearly devoid of jealousy, so jealous reactions often look a little weird and comical to me. But in this case, the circumstances were clearly benign and the physical intimacy I shared with this woman didn’t even reach middle school level.

Any insight, ladies?

I'm not a lady but what you did is a big fault. Such a thing can only be told, when you are sure that your wife have no problem with you with other women

Just a friendly reminder of the rule for the "Ask A Hotwife" thread. Only verified Hot Wives are allowed to answer questions posed on this thread. Thanks!

[Swe_male]

Hi too all you hotwifes!

If you' are having a cuckold at home, how can you continue the thought of he being that, and do you still think he is your safe place and maybe your's children safe place? Is it just in bed and sexually that you are ahead over him and otherwise you are at the same level in your relationship?

I sometime think that woman seeks a strong man (bull) which can make your world rock, at home and in bed. If you have the opposite at home, do you still think this he is your all but you seeks for sex and adventure elsewhere?

I really can't describe my thoughts so good in English but I think you understand. Do you love your cuckold even though he can't satisfy you as your bull.

[here4fun71]

Hi I have been a hotwife for just on 24 years and hubby and myself have had a great time with only a few not so great experiences we definitely are happy.
The reason for my question today is a woman 31 who works in our online store and knows about mine and hubby s lifestyle choices, she has asked quite a few questions which I have answered best I can but she said the other day she was keen to try being a hotwife but was worried about how her husband will react as (her words) he is very Self-conscious about his cock size and she is worried he will think she is trying to put him on the shelf
So I thought someone might have an idea of how to break the ice for her
Thanks in advance

[1FoxxyCajun]

I am hoping one of you ladies can assist me in understanding a situation that struck me as paradoxical. It doesn’t relate to hotwifing directly, but I know many ladies here have engaged in swinging and also experience jealousy. I’m hoping someone has some insight…

Many years ago when my wife and I first started with CNM, we tried same-room swapping a few times. We eventually decided we liked MFM threesomes better (she loved being the center of attention and I loved seeing her engaged with another guy), and that became our main recipe afterward. But the point for this immediate discussion: my wife has directly witnessed me have sex with another woman and it never provoked a jealous response.

Then I recently told her a story about a plane trip from the Middle East to the US that happened many years ago where I shared a spontaneous, 8-hour intimate connection with a woman who was seated next to me. Long story short, flirtation began shortly after we were seated and by the time we were over the Atlantic, sparks progressed into a warm and somewhat soulful vibe--sharing a blanket with the arm rest up and holding hands, and she was asleep on my shoulder. No kissing. Obviously, no sex. And when we arrived at baggage claim, she approached me curious about my layover, and I declined the invitation. I don’t even remember the woman’s name today.

And my wife was very upset about that story. I thought the statute of limitations on that event would have expired years ago! Lol

I can’t for the life of me understand this situation. Bear in mind, I am nearly devoid of jealousy, so jealous reactions often look a little weird and comical to me. But in this case, the circumstances were clearly benign and the physical intimacy I shared with this woman didn’t even reach middle school level.

Any insight, ladies?

I'm a very sensitive person so I'll give this a go. I couldn't be sure but I would imagine it's because what happened there appears to be very emotionally intimate. That can be very triggering depending on your dynamic. Of course it matters that it was inconsequential to you, but it also matters how she feels about the story. People often don't make sense, we just feel things for whatever reason. Feelings are often illogical & what's important is working through them together. Because when you show her that what you truly care about is making her feel comfortable, letting her work through her feelings & saying you acknowledge them, she'll feel validated, trusted, & accepted. This will enforce her knowledge that she can always be open and communicative with you. So I guess what I'm saying is we just don't know how our partners will react to things and even if we think it's weird & we don't understand, what actually matters is that it gets dealt with together as a team. And you probably already know that but that's what I've got lol. Oh and also, the way a woman reacts to something doesn't always have to do with just that one thing. It could be a million different things contributing like previous thoughts, very old memories, her cycle, not having her coffee that day, the way the wind blew. As a woman I can tell you it is hard to make sense of ourselves but we do try.

[Greg_N_Shelley]

I'm a very sensitive person so I'll give this a go. I couldn't be sure but I would imagine it's because what happened there appears to be very emotionally intimate. That can be very triggering depending on your dynamic. Of course it matters that it was inconsequential to you, but it also matters how she feels about the story. People often don't make sense, we just feel things for whatever reason. Feelings are often illogical & what's important is working through them together. Because when you show her that what you truly care about is making her feel comfortable, letting her work through her feelings & saying you acknowledge them, she'll feel validated, trusted, & accepted. This will enforce her knowledge that she can always be open and communicative with you. So I guess what I'm saying is we just don't know how our partners will react to things and even if we think it's weird & we don't understand, what actually matters is that it gets dealt with together as a team. And you probably already know that but that's what I've got lol. Oh and also, the way a woman reacts to something doesn't always have to do with just that one thing. It could be a million different things contributing like previous thoughts, very old memories, her cycle, not having her coffee that day, the way the wind blew. As a woman I can tell you it is hard to make sense of ourselves but we do try.

Thank you for taking the time to respond to my question. My girl is terrible about articulating the rationale behind her feelings, but I think you’re probably right and it was the “emotional texture” of the event that she found threatening. I tried talking it through with her, but she practically held her hands over her ears: “Why are you telling me about this?!!” We're all okay now, but it was a hot moment at the time.

What caught me off guard was how this event somehow triggered her jealousy in a unique way. She knows about other flirtations while I travel, including a woman who ran her nails across my back last year at a restaurant, but none of those provoked a similar degree of response.

One more 'Shelley Mystery' for my codex. Lol.

Thanks for your insight!

[decisions12]

Hi,

did any of the ladies here take the lead on entering this lifestyle and had to overcome a husband's initial unwillingness? And if so, how did he manage to reach a point where he was ok with it?

The more I read on this site the more I see the initial desire as coming from the men- in my case it's the other way round, my wife has begun to indicate that she wants more, and I am not seeing that situation reflected anywhere. I am struggling with getting my head round it all to be honest.

Thanks.

[nick_mr]

I am 65 suffering from diabetes and can’t get hard erections for penetrative sex. Would like wife to be a hotwife so that she can have proper sex. She hasn’t been with anyone but me all her life. She says she’s fine and satisfied. I don’t like our situation. Please help

[decisions12]

I am 65 suffering from diabetes and can’t get hard erections for penetrative sex. Would like wife to be a hotwife so that she can have proper sex. She hasn’t been with anyone but me all her life. She says she’s fine and satisfied. I don’t like our situation. Please help

I'm not a hotwife so please forgive me for answering but...

my friend, you may be able to solve this overnight: get yourself some sildenafil tablets. Available online without prescription or from your local pharmacy.

Start at a 50mg dose and see how that works- raise or lower it as needed. Don't go above 100mg.

Take them an hour beforehand. They won't work if you aren't stimulated so for god's sake don't sit on your own wondering why they aren't working and do spend the time with your lady being romantic.

Good luck

[coastalkid]

I am 65 suffering from diabetes and can’t get hard erections for penetrative sex. Would like wife to be a hotwife so that she can have proper sex. She hasn’t been with anyone but me all her life. She says she’s fine and satisfied. I don’t like our situation. Please help

I'm not a hotwife so please forgive me for answering but...

my friend, you may be able to solve this overnight: get yourself some sildenafil tablets. Available online without prescription or from your local pharmacy.

Start at a 50mg dose and see how that works- raise or lower it as needed. Don't go above 100mg.

Take them an hour beforehand. They won't work if you aren't stimulated so for god's sake don't sit on your own wondering why they aren't working and do spend the time with your lady being romantic.

Good luck

I understand that your are new to the forum and may not be aware that questions posted to the "Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHW's only!' are to be answered by VHW's only.

As you have well discovered people have a lot of opinions and this particular thread is intended to reveal the thoughts/opinions/reactions of Hot Wives only. I feel certain that you did not intend to respond in disregard to that directive.

[nick_mr]

For medical reasons cannot take sildenfil or similar drugs too.

[decisions12]

I understand that your are new to the forum and may not be aware that questions posted to the "Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHW's only!' are to be answered by VHW's only.

As you have well discovered people have a lot of opinions and this particular thread is intended to reveal the thoughts/opinions/reactions of Hot Wives only. I feel certain that you did not intend to respond in disregard to that directive.
[/quote]

My apologies. And you're right, the clue is in the thread title so I have no excuses.

FWIW I have never been chastised in such a drily humorous way before: I am stealing your last line as soon as the opportunity to use it presents itself.