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by NOLA Bull » Wed Dec 05, 2012 10:29 am
There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, more erotic than a husband watching his wife being pleasured by another man. It's just hard for many people to understand how this could be so. Until a few years ago, it certainly was hard for me to understand.
Many years ago one of my employees confided to me that he and his GF were swingers. I wasn't judgmental about it, but couldn't imagine why any man would want his significant other to fuck someone else. After all, I'm an Alpha male and was somewhat possessive about all things that "belonged" to me.
At the time, I was about 10 years into my marriage and had two small children. Our sex life had been okay up until that point, but the demands of childraising began to take a toll on her libido as well as our alone time. I began to worry that she had succumbed to the sexually repressive environment in which she had been raised, and that her sex drive had disappeared for good.
Then, after one of our relatively rare lovemaking sessions, we somehow started talking about fantasies. A few glasses of wine had melted her inhibitions enough that she confessed to me her fantasy of being taken by a group of men.
To my utter amazement, I instantly became aroused again and we fucked again like rabbits. I purchased a few gangbang videos and while watching them would ask her to imagine herself in the scenes; I don't think we ever got more than five minutes into one before starting to fuck furiously.
I racked my brain trying to figure out why I had gone from being a protective and somewhat possessive husband, to being incredibly aroused by the idea of her fucking other men. Especially, the idea of her being the centerpiece of a fuckfest, surrounded by studs hot for her.
Finally, it hit me. Her fantasy about fucking other men was a sign that she still had sexual thoughts and desires. Don't laugh, I seriously had become worried that she was drifting into an irreversible state of frigidity. But whenever I would bring up the subject of her with other men, it would turn her on again, and that in turn turned me on.
Over the next 3-4 years, I made it clear to her that I was not just okay with the idea of her doing this, but affirmatively wanted her to. I not only planted the seed, but tried to nourish it every chance I got. For awhile, talking about her fantasy had a good effect and made her horny.
But over time, my efforts had the reverse effect. Other factors contributed to a growing gap between us, and our 20+ years of monogamy turned into something not even rising to the level of sexual monotony.
Even though we parted ways, the idea of her letting loose with other studs has remained one of my biggest turn-ons. Given the choice between a frigid ice princess and a slut, I would choose slut every time. Although "slut" has pejorative connotations, I've come to consider it a compliment to a woman's robust and self-confident sexuality.
I think some variation of these thoughts is what drives the hotwife scenario. Every husband who has ever shared his wife with me has viewed her as the sexiest woman on the planet. And what better way to affirm that than for her to play out in real life the role of a pornstar? Even better, a pornstar who always comes home to him afterwards.
Maybe I'm off base, but that's the best answer I can come up with based on my own experience, as to why husbands like to share their lovely wives. God bless 'em.
"A hotwife should be treated like a queen and fucked like a pornstar."
I have been wondering so long about this. My ex who got me into being shared around could never explain why he wanted me to have sex with other men no matter how I framed the question. But like a flash of light I can see it all now. He always wanted to be present and watch - though he never joined in - and he loved it if pics were taken. Your explanation about it reflecting voyeuristic tendencies fits him perfectly. I now feel I understand and only wish I had when we were together. I went along with his wishes to demonstrate my feelings for him by complying but it would all have been so much better had I had this understanding your post has given me. Thank you, InigoMontoya. 
