"Why would a guy want his wife to sleep with another man"

[Aynsley]

I'm shocked by this story!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/0 ... ref=topbar
(of course, I'm just kidding, when saying I'm 'shocked' )

[lsd51]

Pretty good post by boisehotwifehubby...

[Mia]

Pretty good post by boisehotwifehubby...

Welcome to OHW, lsd51.



Mia

[007cfc]

We've been together for 18 years, it's taken two years since I mentioned this to my wife , for her to now be in her first six months of being a hotwife.
Upto July this year, three guys have fucked her, but more interestingly she now has a taste for it to the point we have a waiting list and various dates set up.
She is 40 years old, very pretty and a size 8.
She chooses her men, and I've said she should play out her naughty fantasies.
So far she's been fucked by a 35 year old, a 30 year old and a 33 year old, I'm in communication with some other guys who will tick some of her fantasy boxes, a 19 year old and a 65 year old!
Just have to find her the obvious next.. A couple of back guys lol.
I don't get involved in the bedroom, but I've heared her being fucked hard, her cumin and Ive heared the other guys cum filling her.Im always on the lookout for her next cock, but that's how she wants it as she says if I find them , she isn't in any way being unfaithful... Not sure about hotwife, as I tell her she's a slutwife and she agrees lol.

[Mia]

We've been together for 18 years, it's taken two years since I mentioned this to my wife , for her to now be in her first six months of being a hotwife.
Upto July this year, three guys have fucked her, but more interestingly she now has a taste for it to the point we have a waiting list and various dates set up.
She is 40 years old, very pretty and a size 8.
She chooses her men, and I've said she should play out her naughty fantasies.
So far she's been fucked by a 35 year old, a 30 year old and a 33 year old, I'm in communication with some other guys who will tick some of her fantasy boxes, a 19 year old and a 65 year old!
Just have to find her the obvious next.. A couple of back guys lol.
I don't get involved in the bedroom, but I've heared her being fucked hard, her cumin and Ive heared the other guys cum filling her.Im always on the lookout for her next cock, but that's how she wants it as she says if I find them , she isn't in any way being unfaithful... Not sure about hotwife, as I tell her she's a slutwife and she agrees lol.

Welcome to OHW, 007cfc.



Mia

[Fotodom]

my wife and i have been looking for answers. <snip>

Today she said. Find me a therapist that will say this is normal. This is ok. This will not ruin a marriage. And I will find a lover next week.
so anyone can help me on this?

Try looking for 'Kink Aware Professionals', KAP. There are some very good counselors who are quite capable of answering your and her questions, or helping you find Your answers, which is actually the best outcome.
'The Ethical Slut' was written partly by a woman who was my onetime counselor, Dossie, and she was good. The other author, Janet, although not a trained counselor, is a fantastically aware and grounded woman who has helped many.

[couple_uk]

to all of the people that took the time to answer. i sure would like to thank all of you. i sure will make sure that she reads the answers. especially, i will look on finding therapist that could help.
dont know if i will be abe to proceed with this since i had a very bad experiance with that.
we have seen therapist in the past and the minute this subject came up? i became his enemy. and he started with names and accusation and to name a few, he said , you are an idiot, you are a Madonna whore, you are a masochist, you are sick and make me sick,
Why would you take an alcoholic to a bar, and on and on.

and to Alex. your suggestion is good, but most i dont understand as we always Practiced as Jews .

i sure hope to see more answers and hope that i am not stealing this thread.

Watch out for the therapist. They might not understand (probably won't because what we do is a real minority interest) and condemn you for what you naturally want. They also have a good reason to make you believe you need a cure - many cheques over many years, as they convince you or your wife that you continue to need them.

Sexual desire and practice is as varied as mankind itself and to go to someone so they can help you be "normal" is as bad a move as any you can make. A far more positive way of being able to step back and look at this and at yourself is to take time (as a couple of you can) to do some tantra or similar workshops, with people like Barbara Carrelas, Deborah Anpool, Margo Anand, Alan Lowen etc. They have no vested interest in making you dependant on them, what they do is fun and incredibly liberating. Yet it has led me to be faithful to my wife, while she now has the confidence to tell me what she wants and enjoys, which, to my great pleasure, includes other guys.

[unclecuck]

Hello again.
We got few interesting answers. Lots of good info and we will sure follow the advises.
we also got few responds in private and one in particular, hit us very strong.
there are lots of reasons why a man would do that but never thought that the respond we got from this particular person would be so interesting and must be shared.
during the time we started searching this site, we got the book about hotwifing and there are 12 (i think) reasons that Cody is mentioning.
this book was another big help for us to understand and communicate better.
for sure that last private massage i got could top even the book or at list it needs to be in the book or in here.
i am trying to ask the person who responded to me, to allow me to post it in here or at list tell him to post it in here. This is a must be theory.

Thanks all.
Especially thanks to the people who created this site and keep it up and running.

[phughett]

Because it takes the pressure off my performance and don't feel guilty about it. I never really never like screwing, my pleasure was cunnilingus, it what I liked most, not intercourse.

[Mia]

Because it takes the pressure off my performance and don't feel guilty about it. I never really never like screwing, my pleasure was cunnilingus, it what I liked most, not intercourse.

Welcome to OHW, phughett.



Mia

[seth1805]

Why would I want my wife to sleep with another guy?

God I wish I knew the answer. All I know is that it is the most erotic thing I can think of when it comes to sex. Something about the idea of my wife allowing another man to have her and to be intimate with him in front of me drives me up the wall.

[Texman2045]

It makes her feel sexy and young, she loves having boyfriends while still being married, she loves to fuck, she loves to tease me, deny me, and then decide when she will allow me to have pussy.
I love all of the above...plus I feel a great pride in how beautiful she is, how much other guys want her, and then when she does allow me to get between her legs and love her as a husband should...it's never been better after all of these years of marriage.

[1perCentury]

There are a lot of factors that made me get into this lifestyle. I always felt like I was "left out" during my early life, and it continued on during high school where I had to always watch other young couples having fun together and I couldn't connect with people. I was sheltered and didn't always have the best social skills. I got better as I neared adulthood, mainly from being around customers at work. Even after getting my confidence and people skills I still felt "left out" and I get more insecure if I'm not in a relationship where all of her attention is on me. It feels like it releases a burden from my shoulders when I see her commit acts that traditionally should be reserved only for me. I don't like being the center of attention and I relax and get turned on more easily while watching my wife because the spotlight is off of me. It also creates a danger element so I can turn my insecurities into sexual feelings to cope with things appearing too good to be true for my liking.

A little after I first started realizing I had these cuckold feelings, but before I ever tried it, I was having a conversation about my stepmother about my past (her and my dad raised me for most of my childhood) and how I became the person I am, the topic turned to my father and somehow she ended up telling me that he liked to share his women. He wanted her to have a boyfriend but she refused to be with someone other than him. When I found out that even he was into it (and obviously I have never witnessed him being cucked), when I happened to be considering it, I thought maybe I'd try it out. I posted an ad on craigslist for a girlfriend who would sleep around on me, and the woman who later became my wife replied to it. We hit it off fast and even though it happened so fast, we are so close and even her family says that our marriage is exactly how a marriage should be. (they don't know about our lifestyle but its irrelevant and although she does what she does, we have such a strong relationship that few people get to experience.)

[thecuckstopshere]

I can only speek for me and why I like it...
The reason being that I am so into her and seeing her in action or hearing and seeing her pleasure drives me crazy with lust for her. The love for this is about watching her enjoyment not focusing on him. Its about her. I think many people get confused and think it has something to do with the guy...but it does not. This is about seeing and hearing her her passionate love making. Its almost like I am doing it to her but can take a few steps back to enjoy what I am doing by seeing it like I am watching my wife in a porno but better. I don't know if this helps anyone understand more or if they can grasp that but it is how I feel.

[Mia]

I can only speek for me and why I like it...
The reason being that I am so into her and seeing her in action or hearing and seeing her pleasure drives me crazy with lust for her. The love for this is about watching her enjoyment not focusing on him. Its about her. I think many people get confused and think it has something to do with the guy...but it does not. This is about seeing and hearing her her passionate love making. Its almost like I am doing it to her but can take a few steps back to enjoy what I am doing by seeing it like I am watching my wife in a porno but better. I don't know if this helps anyone understand more or if they can grasp that but it is how I feel.

Welcome to OHW, thecuckstopshere.



Mia

[54321]

Dear Thecuckstopshere,

How beautifully put! Thank you and welcome to this forum. I hope you and your wife will share some of your experiences with us.

Best wishes,

54321

[curiouspete]

I can only speek for me and why I like it...
The reason being that I am so into her and seeing her in action or hearing and seeing her pleasure drives me crazy with lust for her. The love for this is about watching her enjoyment not focusing on him. Its about her. I think many people get confused and think it has something to do with the guy...but it does not. This is about seeing and hearing her her passionate love making. Its almost like I am doing it to her but can take a few steps back to enjoy what I am doing by seeing it like I am watching my wife in a porno but better. I don't know if this helps anyone understand more or if they can grasp that but it is how I feel.

That's how I feel too, to be able to watch this happen is the ultimate for me

[bltn1966]

When me and wife started dating she would occasionally tell me about her post sex experience. I noticed the more I got her to drink, the more detail she would tell me about her past lovers. The more she would tell me, the more I got turned on. I couldn't get her to tell me a damn thing when she was sober. She wouldn't admit to having sex with anybody and she couldn't believe she had told me about her post lovers. One night, after a party, she explicitly told me a lot about her few lovers.
-She told me if they were good or not.
-If he had a big or small cock.
-If they made her cum or not
-All the positions they tried....etc
That night we had the best sex of our life.

[dannydevon]

i know how much i love to have 2 women all to myself so it doesn't take too much thinking to realise that maybe she would enjoy the attention of 2 men... i love her so i want her to have everything she needs

the fact that a lot of women also looking really f***ing sexy taking on 2 men is a lucky bonus

[cornudo]

Some of us are just pussies!

[wannabcucked]

Way not .It hot if I can view her having full pleasure

[omygod]

I found that my wife has been fucking other guys sense we were married over 30 yrs ago. She has had a new lover at least once a yr. sometimes more. Her best friend said it was just imdiscretions . So I brought up that we should get together with some of our friends. They have shown interest in us as well as one of her girlfriends. When I told her that one of her girlfriend wanted to have sex with her and I was ok with it,she started to open up about all of it. I think she has wanted to fuck one of my long time friends for the last three years and I said we were married for love,not sex. She agreed and she said it might be alot of fun. So I guess "I want my wife to sleep with another man " because at least I know who the hell they are and I can keep a leash on when and where. The excitement about it is getting fever pitched as our friends are in other states.or miles away .So we are discussing going on a swing site to find a couple that is as desirable as being with our friends. And yes they are wanting to be here for us as well. There has been times when my wife was gone for most of the day ,saying she was shopping ,but never bought anything. We would have sex that night and she would be dripping with love juices. I sort of liked that and have made a habit of telling her how good it feels with all that wetness. Than sometimes she is normal wet and it is very hard to enter her,so I know it's been awhile. At least she hasn't ask me to eat her after her little indiscretions. But than I would be on the cockold site wouldn't I.

[Beginners]

Why would a guy want his wife to sleep with another man? I don't know about other husbands. Analysing my own case why I became a cuckold I can surmise it was growing slowly in me in years and the ultimate cause was my wife's lack of sexual desire towards me. Or maybe she does not love me any longer?...

[jimmybo]

One reason I like the HW brand of marriage is that it helps cure me of thinking possessively, of thinking that she's "my woman." I like R best when I view her as an independent person, who lives her own life largely on her own terms and yet, miraculously, has committed herself to going through life with me.

I think of my computer as MINE, ditto my car and my house and my career...

But when it comes to the one I love, ownership doesn't work. Before we tried HWing, I admit that there were months, even years, when I took R for granted, when I viewed her as "my wife" in the possessive, non-romantic sense of that phrase.

However, that rarely happens when she has another relationship. And now, even when she doesn't, knowing that it's possible reminds me to view R not as an object but rather as the free spirit that she truly is.

IH

I like this answer, I have never thought of it in this way but it makes a whole lot of sense.

[Wanttosheher]

I agree with a few of the posts on here, it is a couple of factors.
- the voyeur side of things, watching her with another man,
- but the most important to me is to see the amount of pleasure she can get from 2 men vs. 1.
I am not interested in her going at it alone. Seeing more hands fondling her breasts drives me crazy...