Another man loves my wife

When a fuck buddy becomes something more.
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Sexilexi
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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by Sexilexi » Wed Apr 10, 2019 9:51 pm

Mark,

I will admit I was super nervous when I came across your thread and read your first post. But I was so intrigued. I skimmed through your pages and I am so happy to hear your story! This is amazing. I feel like emotions and feelings and love is all natural and part of human nature. And if we all could just accept it, and be ok with it, then our society would run smoother.

I feel, so far, your story is beautiful! Thank you so much for sharing!

I absolutely loved how you described “silky seconds” Man oh man! Loved the description.

Keep sharing!

-Lexi
Un día a la vez

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Fri Apr 12, 2019 8:02 am

Hello Lexi....Thank you very much.

Yes, the emotions involved in this type of experience are natural, and the reactions to the experiences are as varied as the individuals involved. I've used this forum more as a personal journal rather than to entertain readers, but it's truly helped me as a husband to convey how our own experience has been and it seems others can relate. So for that I am truly happy.

We have been in this lifestyle for 4 years now, and what has amazed me is how the relationships between my wife, our friend and myself have developed and gone through changes to get to the point where we are now. It didn't happen overnight and is honestly still developing. My wife is just now showing a comfort level that I had not seen in her previously. She is now more comfortable about allowing herself to express more openly that she enjoys the three-way relationship, and by that I mean not just in the bedroom. I think she feels better about accepting Brian as an emotionally intimate friend and not just a sexually intimate friend. Hope that makes sense...

All the best to you Lexi.

Mark
Officially became a husband of a hotwife on February 13, 2015!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by shall54 » Fri Apr 12, 2019 8:35 pm

Mark, It's nice to hear that Juli is getting more comfortable with the three way relationship. How do you see this evolving? Right now it's a relationship between Juli and you, and between Juli and Brian. Would a three way ever be possible now...I know Brian expressed that he did not want to be watched but could that change?? With Juli's new comfort level maybe she might share a few more details??? Maybe you are happy with the way things are now and don't see, or want any changes?

Again, this is one of the hotter threads on this site and always look forward to you posts and pictures of Juli!!! Thank you,
Steve

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Mon Apr 15, 2019 6:55 am

Hi Steve...Thanks,

To answer your question, honestly I do not see major changes coming in our relationship with Brian. I think the three of us have settled into a very comfortable ( I hesitate to say "routine" because this type of situation is not routine in the typical sense of the word)....but it really is working quite well for Brian and Juli to basically have their own relationship within the bounds of an "intimate friendship". Of course Juli and I remain totally dedicated to each other and our marriage and our own sexual relationship.

What she has with Brian is really an added bonus for us all in our own individual ways. It has taken 4 years to get to this point and so we at least for now, are enjoying the comfort level that we have with the way things are.

I will go ahead and add this bit of news which I was going to do in a separate post, but we have scheduled time for them to be alone for 2 nights in May. I have a business meeting at a certain hotel in a city about 2 hours from us, so Brian will accompany us to that city, he and Juli will stay together in a separate, nearby B&B while I am in my meetings. I will then rejoin them 2 days later for our return trip home. This is the first time since our initial sharing (in Chicago in Feb 2015) that they will have had the opportunity to spend time together alone as a couple. So we anticipate it will be more like a date for them to be by themselves for two days. Juli is looking forward to the trip and it's nice to see that relaxed excitement in her. She did ask me only if I was sure that I'd be okay if they stayed in a separate location from me, and once I assured her that it would be better that my business colleagues not see my wife with another man, then she immediately started planning for her extended date with Brian.

Mark
Officially became a husband of a hotwife on February 13, 2015!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by BlueDuck » Mon Apr 15, 2019 8:10 am

Congrats! You guys have an awesome relationship!
Links to our photos: http://ourhotwives.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=33091

Instagram blue_duck_97

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by pasadena95 » Mon Apr 15, 2019 8:29 pm

Is it possible you might join them for dinner or a brief visit while the three of you are all in the same city? Would not this be helpful in showing your support of Juli and solidifying your friendship with Brian while he is spending so much intimate time with your wife? After all, apart from his affair with Juli, you are all friends.
Not judging in any way, just wondering.

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Tue Apr 16, 2019 6:37 am

Yes ideally I would join them, but my evenings are already scheduled with business dinners each of the two nights. So on this trip they will have evenings alone. We arrive at our destination around noon on a Thursday, I will stay at the meeting hotel until Saturday morning. Brian and Juli will be alone Thursday evening, all day Friday and Friday night...until Saturday morning.
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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Tue Apr 16, 2019 6:38 am

pasadena95 wrote:
Mon Apr 15, 2019 8:29 pm
Is it possible you might join them for dinner or a brief visit while the three of you are all in the same city? Would not this be helpful in showing your support of Juli and solidifying your friendship with Brian while he is spending so much intimate time with your wife? After all, apart from his affair with Juli, you are all friends.
Not judging in any way, just wondering.
Yes ideally I would join them, but my evenings are already scheduled with business dinners each of the two nights. So on this trip they will have evenings alone. We arrive at our destination around noon on a Thursday, I will stay at the meeting hotel until Saturday morning. Brian and Juli will be alone Thursday evening, all day Friday and Friday night...until Saturday morning.
Officially became a husband of a hotwife on February 13, 2015!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by shall54 » Tue Apr 16, 2019 10:20 am

Wow, incredible and exciting!! Hopefully on that Saturday night Juli will share the details of their weekend with you!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by pasadena95 » Tue Apr 16, 2019 11:51 am

You have got it figured out. Most of us struggle a bit more in making these complicated relationships work to everyone's benefit.
So---Congratulations!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by Missthefun » Tue Apr 16, 2019 6:04 pm

Mark, as always, thanks so much for the update. I am looking forward to hearing about the adventure! What an incredibly hot scenario. Traveling together should be fun! Sexual tension in the air. Pleasant conversation. I look forward to hearing about it. And the trip home! Wow! That should be hot!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Tue May 07, 2019 11:22 am

We are now home from our weekend and it went very well. While I was in business meetings at a downtown hotel, Juli and Brian spent two nights together in a nearby B&B. We arrived mid day Thursday and so they had Thursday night, all day Friday, Friday night, and I met up with them again on Saturday morning for our return trip home.

It rained much of the time so Juli told me they spent most of their day on Thursday in the room and only venturing out for lunch and dinner. She said they had sex twice on Thursday, three times on Friday and once more early on Saturday morning before breakfast. She admits she is sore from all the activity, and between her soreness and our schedule, she and I still have not had sex since we got home (other than oral sex that she gave me on Sunday morning).

She did answer some of my obvious questions which I will share here soon when I have more time. I wanted to let everyone know briefly how it went.

Mark
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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by D+D » Tue May 07, 2019 6:27 pm

That sounds like they had fun.... Awesome
Thanks for the update.

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by voxhominum » Tue May 07, 2019 9:06 pm

Whoa, six times total! Juli must have loved getting to spend so much uninterrupted private time alone with Brian. What a great weekend! How in the world did you concentrate on your meetings?

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by SutterKane » Wed May 08, 2019 4:54 pm

voxhominum wrote:
Tue May 07, 2019 9:06 pm
Whoa, six times total! Juli must have loved getting to spend so much uninterrupted private time alone with Brian. What a great weekend! How in the world did you concentrate on your meetings?
What he said!
"Women and cats will do as they please,and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea"-Robert Heinlein
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Dum Vivimus, Vivamus!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Thu May 09, 2019 8:09 am

SutterKane wrote:
Wed May 08, 2019 4:54 pm
voxhominum wrote:
Tue May 07, 2019 9:06 pm
Whoa, six times total! Juli must have loved getting to spend so much uninterrupted private time alone with Brian. What a great weekend! How in the world did you concentrate on your meetings?
What he said!
Yes I admit it was hard to concentrate in my meetings. I was very happy for both Juli and Brian that they were getting to enjoy each other for 48 hours of private intimacy. I know how much sex with Brian is satisfying for Juli, and of course Brian goes without sex for weeks at a time, and so his time with Juli is limited, and I was glad that he got to be alone with her on this trip. With my meeting time it all really worked out well for the three of us.

Mark
Officially became a husband of a hotwife on February 13, 2015!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by shall54 » Fri May 10, 2019 5:16 pm

Yeah, I'll bet it was 'hard' pun intended! Sounds like Juli and Brian really out did themselves on this trip! I hope she does share more of the details with you. Thanks for sharing this with us!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by Missthefun » Fri May 10, 2019 5:43 pm

Thanks again, Mark! Always love to hear your updates! Glad to hear about your wonderful trip! Love to hear more!

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by Missthefun » Fri May 31, 2019 1:22 pm

Hi, Mark. Just checking in to see how things are going. Hope you're well.

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Mon Jun 03, 2019 6:32 am

Missthefun wrote:
Fri May 31, 2019 1:22 pm
Hi, Mark. Just checking in to see how things are going. Hope you're well.
Hi...Everything is going well. You know Juli and Brian had their 2 nights alone last month while I was at a business meeting. Nothing since then but June is going to be another month where I will need to call on Brian for help. I am having some outpatient surgery this month...nothing serious but the Dr. has already said "no sexual activity for 3 weeks following the procedure". I made a point to let Brian know, and I also talked to Juli and made sure she understood that I WANT her to let Brian service her during my recovery.

If I had said that to her even a year ago, she would have balked...but now she didn't argue but simply said "Okay" :-)
So probably after I am home for a few days, and doing well and resting....Juli will visit Brian at his house for an afternoon.

Mark
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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by mfmseeker1969 » Mon Jun 03, 2019 6:36 am

Such trust. And a true friend and a very sexy wife. Smiles all the way around.

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by shall54 » Mon Jun 03, 2019 10:53 pm

Mark, Now that Juli is more comfortable with her relationship with Brian, has she talked with you about how she feels about Brian with respect to you? Early on, I believe she did not think very much of him in terms of a long term relationship, but has that changed? You posted this in the Poly Forum originally and I think you may have wanted (or fantasized) about this happening, but what about Juli, has she any desire for a poly type situation/relationship?

Thank you for sharing with us, and if you have any more photos of Juli you would be willing to share with us that would be great!!
Steve

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Tue Jun 04, 2019 3:42 am

shall54 wrote:
Mon Jun 03, 2019 10:53 pm
Mark, Now that Juli is more comfortable with her relationship with Brian, has she talked with you about how she feels about Brian with respect to you? Early on, I believe she did not think very much of him in terms of a long term relationship, but has that changed? You posted this in the Poly Forum originally and I think you may have wanted (or fantasized) about this happening, but what about Juli, has she any desire for a poly type situation/relationship?

Thank you for sharing with us, and if you have any more photos of Juli you would be willing to share with us that would be great!!
Steve
Hi Steve....Excellent question.
Yes this last year especially, Juli has become more practical and open about the relationship she has with Brian. They have been sexual partners now for 4 years, so it's only natural that the bond between them has developed beyond just the physical sex. Yes, the sex is still the main foundation of their relationship, but even Juli now realizes and admits to me that what they do in bed is lovemaking and not just sex. (passionate in other words).

Now in our conversations (between Juli and me) she is still very quick to add that she loves Brian but as an "intimate friend" and not on the same level as the love she has for me. And I know she is totally right about that. During that conversation, I was the one who pointed out that it is possible for a woman to love two men at the same time, but with different types or intensities of that love. She agreed and now affirms that her feelings for me and for Brian are exactly like that. She and I share many years of marriage and all of the bonding life experiences that make a marriage unique and special between a man and a woman, including our own (marriage) sex. And with Brian she shares a friendship which includes their own unique sexual bond that only they can truly experience when they are alone together in their own bed. Even I as the husband cannot be a part of what Juli and Brian share as a couple in the bedroom. They have their own sexual relationship in Brian's bed, separate from what Juli and I have in our bed.

So yes, Juli's love for Brian has definitely grown...and as the verse says...."Love covers a multitude of sins." So whatever personality quirks that Juli used to find off-putting in Brian...she now does not see in him. And for me personally, I am very aware of my own sexual limitations especially compared to Brian...Juli of course knows the differences more than anyone.... So while Juli is still not quite to the point of openly making this admission...I view myself as the husband with the obvious sexual rights that husbands have, but I view Brian as Juli's primary sex partner because of the quality of sex that I know she has and enjoys with him.

And to your point about the poly relationship. I believe that for all intents and purposes, that's what we have with Brian. The definitions of "poly" may vary, but to my understanding, it is a deep relationship which includes the husband and wife and at least one other person. Brian of course has extended to him the same full sexual rights to Juli's body as I do as her husband. And just recently, Juli and Brian spent two days and two nights alone together as a couple while I was in my business meetings. So their relationship now extends (at least at times) beyond the bedroom and they are observed in public as a couple.

Mark
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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by D+D » Tue Jun 04, 2019 7:45 am

Awesome update Mark. Thanks as always. I so agree with all of your points. They are spot on. I do have a question. In the beginning, julie would go at regular intervals to Brian's home to spend a day or night. She eventually quite saying that Brian should find a mate. I have always believed that she feared her growing feelings for him. Of course he never found that person because that person is Julie. He is and has always, probably even before his divorce, been in love with your wife. Now at long last, she is reciprocating that love. When they finally began having sex this last time, he had to come to your house while you were in the house. Has this changed? If not, shouldn't it? Should they not have their regular time together, not as just friends with benefits, but as a loving couple? I beleive in the beginning this was your fantasy hence your handle co-husband. I realize that it's a big thing to admit, but that's basically where you are. Brian can never replace you in Julie's heart for the reasons that you've given, but as you've also stated, they have their own personal relationship that has flowered and grown into a loving, caring union of two individuals. Of course there can never be the deep roots that you and Julie have, but it is their relationship unique to the two of them. Would Julie, would you now consider Brian's home as her second home that she and Brian could share on a regular basis as "their" home?

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Re: Another man loves my wife

Unread post by co-husband » Tue Jun 04, 2019 9:30 am

Hi D+D,

It truly is a complex relationship that we all three share together. I think there will always be certain lines that just cannot be crossed even if we all wanted to. By that I mean a long-term marriage has within it a lifetime of shared experiences and a deep love that only comes with time. So while we have invited Brian into our marriage in a sense, his role will always be much more distant than mine. It's just impossible for him and I to have the same level of relationship with Juli. So my own concept of a "co-husband" is true but only to a point. Sexually..yes I think Brian and I do share that relationship with Juli. But the broader things in our life, he is a very distant second and always will be. Not that it is my desire it be that way..it's just the laws of relationship physics so to speak.

I do agree with you that Brian I'm sure at least had feelings for my wife even while he was married to his own wife. Their marriage obviously was not good, and Juli truly is not only a beautiful woman to look at, but such a pleasant and friendly personality, other men enjoy being around her. And we were around Brian and his wife often enough socially, that when their marriage did end, I think Brian turned his affection to my wife.

You may recall that prior to their sexual relationship, I had seen those types of looks on Brian's face whenever he was around Juli, so I encouraged her to have lunch with him as a friend who was hurting from his divorce. Sweet Juli did so very innocently..and then one day when Brian expressed to her that he felt he may be "falling in love" with her..Juli was shocked. Brian almost ended my subtle experiment, and it did take months for Juli to come back to being open to seeing Brian alone. (That Valentine weekend in 2015 was the event that launched this dance we have been fine-tuning ever since.

So Brian has dated other women and in fact now has a "friend" he sees but she is admittedly a-sexual...so Brian has a green light from her to meet with Juli for his physical needs. So my wife IS Brian's sex partner and now they share emotional intimacy with each other as well. So it is no secret at least among the three of us that Brian loves Juli, Juli loves Brian, and Juli and I love each other. Currently we have been able to sustain this equilibrium and hopefully will be able to for a while longer.

You mentioned that time that Brian had sex with Juli at our house. That only lasted one time...it was just too awkward for all of us. So now she is with him in private at his house. Juli still is guarded not to do it too often, so she wouldn't consider Brian's house to be hers..or theirs. I think we are all trying to keep the status quo as it currently is working so well.

Mark
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