BritishBull2k25 wrote: ↑Tue Mar 11, 2025 6:11 am
There's a wave of research (possibly taken with a pinch of salt) on human sexuality suggesting that kink and subset lifestyles within it, can be considered their own sexualities.
They often manifest around the same time as hetero/homo/bisexuality, repression/conversion therapy doesn't work on them, and ignoring them often leads to them returning in full force.
Regardless, with any loving relationship it's important to have both partners needs met where possible
Very interesting post. I think that I can personally relate with your statement and I will try to elaborate to see if you agree.
I first brought up the idea to my gf at 15/16 years old, we finally gave the lifestyle a try at 19 and went on for 7 years sharing her. I'd say 15/16 is definitely a time that many are in the determination of hetero/homo/bi... In my case, I simply wanted my girlfriend in high school to sleep around with other guys. I wanted to experience her tell me that she wasn't walking with me after school because she was going to "hangout" with another guy. Lol
After that relationship ended, I repressed the feelings and desire to have a promiscuous girlfriend. Despite several semi-long and long relationships. Even though I kept telling myself I didn't want it, deep down I wished they were doing the exact same thing as the ex did which was being out several nights per week with different men, and more often than not going away to stay with other men on the weekends.
After 6 or 7 years of telling myself i was done, and at the first few hints of my then GF of several years having a sudden change in behavior (dressing sexier, going on vacation with a GF and only packing sexy bathing suits/outfits, making new guy friends, her asking me if it was okay for her to go dancing with other men/hangout alone with other men) i returned in full force and one drunken night I told her my observations of her behavior/questions and I told her that I was okay with her going dancing/hanging out alone with other men. I told her that I loved her new sexy revealing clothes, and that I was not a jealous guy. I told her that if dancing/hanging out with men alone ended in temptation for her, that I was okay and accepting of her choices and I would not be mad if she ended not coming home early on those nights or at all. She had quite the dominant personality and I expected her to immediately agree and even braced for it because I know she would've really pushed boundaries and really made me accept her desires. She was not pleased at all with my talk and we broke up shortly after. I think she may have been testing me to see if I would be the jealous or sharing type.
Still in the returning In full force stages:
A few years after that, I'm dating my current gf and I find myself unable to turn off the cuckold desires. They have gotten stronger and more intense, now I''m not just wanting my lady to sleep with other men But instead I want to be cuckolded to the point of being made to watch as I'm replaced by another man. We had the conversation early in our relationship, she was not judgemental. She has gone on many dates over the years, has flirted with men in front of me, has left me sitting by myself multiple times at bars and clubs while she goes to sit with another man for the remainder of the night. She hasn't done anything other than getting undressed during heavy foreplay with another man.
I feel like it's who I am and I can't control the fact that I want my partner to want to be with someone else. I can't wait for the day where she sits me down and comes clean to me and tells me that she wants to start dating again or wants to look for a boyfriend. I am even okay with something more abrupt and extreme which would prompt the conversation or more preferably an ultimatum. The full force of cuckold desires in me would be accepting of catching her in the act with another man in bed or perhaps running into her in public while with another man. Later prompting her to sit me down and give me the ultimatum to let her be promiscuous or walk away, and of course I'd accept the ultimatum and settle for having a partner that will never be fully exclusive or mine. This full force in me pushes me to desire of wanting to be a cuckold to the point where my desire is to become my partner's secondary man while she establishes a relationship with another man who becomes main/primary to her.
Since that initial repression of my cuckold desires, I've realized that the dynamic that I want to have in my relationship is similar to the one in my first and only lifestyle relationship. I want a relationship where my girlfriend is permanently single and available despite being my partner. If she is interested in another man, then by default she is single and available regardless of me being with /next her. It doesn't matter if we are out on a date, if she is approached and she likes the guy or if she sees a guy she likes, I automatically become her best friend and she puts me on hold on the spot while she engages with him.
