Advice needed

[amaretto83]

Hello everyone, I’ve been reading your stories for a while, but only now did I gather the courage to write.
In short, our story is as follows.
I am 42, my wife is 38, and we’ve been together for 22 years.
15 years ago, my wife cheated on me with a coworker, which almost destroyed me, but we managed to get through it together, though it wasn’t easy.
Three months ago, she confessed that she feels very attracted to an employee at a nearby store and that she is a bit confused.
A few days later, she told me that she kissed him but didn’t sleep with him.
My problem is that every time I think about their kiss, my mind goes further than that—I imagine them having sex, and these thoughts don’t go away until I masturbate while thinking about my wife having sex with another man…
I need the opinion and advice of those who have gone through what I’m going through now.

I don’t know what i feel right now, am i a cuckold or it’s just a fantasy ?

[Shadnaster]

My wife cheated on me with an ex years ago. It was devastating. We worked through it though. And, like you, i found myself oddly turned on thinking about it later. I had no idea what it was. Sex was always something we just did but never really talked about it. This helped us open up to each other. Eventually it got to a point where I could ask details about it and she could see how it got me aroused. She'd tell me stories about her past adventures too. Stuff we never talked about before. She made me understand that it wasn't love with her ex, it was just sex.

[Shadnaster]

My wife cheated on me with an ex years ago. It was devastating. We worked through it though. And, like you, i found myself oddly turned on thinking about it later. I had no idea what it was. Sex was always something we just did but never really talked about it. This helped us open up to each other. Eventually it got to a point where I could ask details about it and she could see how it got me aroused. She'd tell me stories about her past adventures too. Stuff we never talked about before. She made me understand that it wasn't love with her ex, it was just sex.

[Wantsomefunto]

I too started this journey of sharing my wife after I learned she cheated. You wife with another man is a powerful emotion with lots of mixed feelings. Ask her what it is that she like about this new guy. Then talk through with her is she wants him sexually and let her tr tit as long as she keeps you informed of what is going on.

[Restarting]

15 years ago, my wife cheated on me with a coworker, which almost destroyed me, but we managed to get through it together, though it wasn’t easy.

How long ago did you find out?

[BCiym]

Since my wife had gone to bed with a lot of guys before we met I wasn’t totally surprised when I figured out that she was sleeping with an old flame of hers. This will sound strange to some, but I didn’t take it personally. It was clear she didn’t want to split up so the way I thought of it was (is) that she just wasn’t wired up for monogamy. Seeing the primitive way husbands usually react to their wives having sex with another guy I was proud that I reacted the way I did. I thought it was very mature on my part, and still do. BUT I was also hugely turned on by it in a way I’d never been turned on before.
So the way it evolved for me is that the most intense orgasms I’ve ever had come from me masturbating thinking of her fucking other men. It is a HUGE turn on for me when I find “evidence” it happened (like seeing her cum stained panties when I do the laundry). If my wife and I were to ever split up there’s no way I’d want to be married to a woman who doesn’t fuck around. Being cuckolded is basic to who I am. The entire idea of a monogamous marriage totally bores me.

[Wantsomefunto]

Great post BC, love to chat

[Fearlesspain]

Hello everyone, I’ve been reading your stories for a while, but only now did I gather the courage to write.
In short, our story is as follows.
I am 42, my wife is 38, and we’ve been together for 22 years.
15 years ago, my wife cheated on me with a coworker, which almost destroyed me, but we managed to get through it together, though it wasn’t easy.
Three months ago, she confessed that she feels very attracted to an employee at a nearby store and that she is a bit confused.
A few days later, she told me that she kissed him but didn’t sleep with him.
My problem is that every time I think about their kiss, my mind goes further than that—I imagine them having sex, and these thoughts don’t go away until I masturbate while thinking about my wife having sex with another man…
I need the opinion and advice of those who have gone through what I’m going through now.

I don’t know what i feel right now, am i a cuckold or it’s just a fantasy ?

It appears as though your wife has no intentions of being monogamous. That being said, if the Hotwife lifestyle is for you, then you're in the right place.

You don't have to be a cuck and could embrace the stag/vixen lifestyle or even be a swinger if she's okay with sharing you as well.

It's best to have an honest conversation with her and confess your thoughts and feelings. She's open enough to share her secret of desire and kissing with you. That is usually the hardest part.

You very well could have an amazing opportunity to have a sexy wife who enjoys telling you all the kinky things she's doing. It really all depends on what you want. If you want it, it's there. If not, she's going to cheat on you again eventually and you'll have to decide what you're going to do about it.

[ucaneffher]

Hello everyone, I’ve been reading your stories for a while, but only now did I gather the courage to write.
In short, our story is as follows.
I am 42, my wife is 38, and we’ve been together for 22 years.
15 years ago, my wife cheated on me with a coworker, which almost destroyed me, but we managed to get through it together, though it wasn’t easy.
Three months ago, she confessed that she feels very attracted to an employee at a nearby store and that she is a bit confused.
A few days later, she told me that she kissed him but didn’t sleep with him.
My problem is that every time I think about their kiss, my mind goes further than that—I imagine them having sex, and these thoughts don’t go away until I masturbate while thinking about my wife having sex with another man…
I need the opinion and advice of those who have gone through what I’m going through now.

I don’t know what i feel right now, am i a cuckold or it’s just a fantasy ?

Many of us would give anything to have a wife like yours . As others have said, maybe she isnt wired to be monogamous and it was eventually going to happen. For all you know, she has been wanting it since that one time that she stepped out on you. Maybe she has been doing it without getting caught but now feels like being honest with you will get her a hall pass.

If you are turned on by it, which you seem like it as you have masturbated to the thought of it already, then maybe it's time to sit down and have an honest conversation. Tell her that her honesty and hearing what she told you actually turned you on and you'd like to hear what she likes about him?

Perhaps you can then ask her.... in the event that she had a Hall pass with no restrictions, what does she have in mind with her crush? Does she just want a little play time or does she want to have a lover on the side with your permission?

If you are calm and collected without showing anger or sadness, she will likely open up and tell you what she wants.

Wishing you the best of luck!

[MrMtl]

Hello everyone, I’ve been reading your stories for a while, but only now did I gather the courage to write.
In short, our story is as follows.
I am 42, my wife is 38, and we’ve been together for 22 years.
15 years ago, my wife cheated on me with a coworker, which almost destroyed me, but we managed to get through it together, though it wasn’t easy.
Three months ago, she confessed that she feels very attracted to an employee at a nearby store and that she is a bit confused.
A few days later, she told me that she kissed him but didn’t sleep with him.
My problem is that every time I think about their kiss, my mind goes further than that—I imagine them having sex, and these thoughts don’t go away until I masturbate while thinking about my wife having sex with another man…
I need the opinion and advice of those who have gone through what I’m going through now.

I don’t know what i feel right now, am i a cuckold or it’s just a fantasy ?

First, if you’re here it’s because something triggers you around this lifestyle, if not, you wouldn’t be here.

Did she knows about your feelings regarding this employee at the nearby store ? After what happened saying it was tough after the first time, looks like she’s at ease telling you what just happened. Or she knows that you are excited about it.