"Why would a guy want his wife to sleep with another man"

[early-kink]

I apologize for posting some things that, in hindsight, I should not have posted. Some of the things I posted are in error, and I should stick to MY own beliefs. Again - my apology.

To the mods - please delete my recent posts on this forum, from October to today. Thank-you.

[Des 31]

I love that this worked out for the two of you and that she is getting the dick she deserves. Thank you for posting that.

~ Des

Des 31 -
Your last sentence above "that this worked out for the two of you and that she's getting the dick she deserves." Having had a hotgirlfriend some time ago, I can relate to your thought here. I would ask, "Don't all women - all ages - deserve to enjoy a guy(s) on the side if they choose" ????? If a wife or girlfriend would like to see/date a guy in addition to their marriage/primary relationship - and the husband or "exclusive boyfriend" agrees and supports her in that (after fully discussing it) - wouldn't it make her happier?? And then by her happiness, make the primary relationships happier, stronger, sexually hotter, and more loving??

I agree that works for us and most members here. When a guy gets around to adjust his thinking that way - and if his wife/gf has the same attitude, it usually works for both partners.

The women are happier, the guy is happier. It took me about a year to convince my wife. I was thrilled when she ultimately agreed, and now she says it would be difficult to go back to the time when it was just the two of us. I agree with her on that. One of her tee shirts is imprinted with, "It isn't cheating if my husband approves." That's the way I see it too. My wife will be getting dicked again this weekend by her current favorite guy and I'll be home happily jerking off while knowing she will be well taken care of.

~ Des

[Wesley Hudson Valley]

Des 31 made some very important points

In the Hotwife lifestyle the wife is happier, more satisfied and confident, feels more like a desirable female than just a wife and mother.

Less stress on the husband to meet all his wife’s needs

I talk great pleasure it being at home happily jerking off when my wife is out having sex with a well hung stud

[BDJ]

I recently posted a modified version of this on Christlydi's thread in response to a reflection he was having on this exact topic. Here's his link: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=65641

I think my own impetus toward this lifestyle grew out of ignorance and a feeling of inadequacy. My family was poor and large (five children with me the only and youngest male), living in the most religiously fundamental part of my state. I was surrounded by women growing up and took many clues about male behavior from their presence, which is to say, their idea of ideal male behavior on a date. Sex wasn't a part of that. You just did not talk about it; and girls, at least those of my acquaintance in high school, did not allow roaming hands. I was shy and never got anywhere trying to feel up a date. My wife was my first success in that venture...and I, hers. She was so beautiful, so out of my league I kept wondering why she was as besotted with me as I was with her. We explored each others' bodies...and we were inept, after all, she hadn't had any sex instruction either and wouldn't let boys feel her up before me. After marriage I found out just how poorly I performed sexually; never long enough or with sufficient foreplay. She never complained. I got the idea in my head it would be good for us for her to have sex with someone else. I never told her I'd like that too. I convinced her after awhile. Our good friend through all this was available for her to explore with, though. She thought he was sexy and chose him to be her first. She got fucked for more than an hour and he came in her four times. She definitely had the 'glow' of a well fucked woman right afterwards. I discovered I got off on it happening, got off even more later when I got the chance to watch them, and finally settled into this mindset after seeing her with a new man as part of a couples swap. It has become a part of my nature. She loved it from the start--when it was happening--but denied needing anyone but me the rest of the time. It was glorious seeing the transformation from disinterest to abject lust, taking a new cock ferociously: losing herself to the experience, completely out of control.

Now the part no one would like to read: I almost lost her. She fell out of love with me twenty some years after marriage from a combination of this lifestyle and my ignoring her (she said.) She only had one long term lover (three years) and it went from a shared experience to one where she became less and less open to their activities. I let it happen...too turned on by her cravings for his cock. I didn't know it had morphed into love. My marriage survived because he was just using her as a cum dump and strung her along until she wanted him instead of me and told him. I took her back and she eventually fell back in love with me. I still loved her: she still was my muse. From then on we only did select, long term couples swinging. That was safe for us.

A caution though for all you wannabes: beware of what you want in life...you may get it.

BDJ

[Chrislydi]

Now the part no one would like to read: I almost lost her. She fell out of love with me twenty some years after marriage from a combination of this lifestyle and my ignoring her (she said.) She only had one long term lover (three years) and it went from a shared experience to one where she became less and less open to their activities. I let it happen...too turned on by her cravings for his cock. I didn't know it had morphed into love. My marriage survived because he was just using her as a cum dump and strung her along until she wanted him instead of me and told him. I took her back and she eventually fell back in love with me. I still loved her: she still was my muse. From then on we only did select, long term couples swinging. That was safe for us.

A caution though for all you wannabes: beware of what you want in life...you may get it.

BDJ

I would change that highlighted sentence to 'Now the part everyone should read'. It's always struck me how blasé and disregarding some are on the accompanying dangers of this lifestyle, it'll never happen to them and they don't need to be careful what they wish for.

Your underlying bond was so strong that even when once broken there was something within both of you, a lifetime of shared memories and experiences and a path of sexual discovery that had been shared from relative innocence to experimentation, so a full sexual awakening for both that could be both renewed and revived. The actual split which could have been terminal and the emotional reconciliation, the gradual regrowth of that bond enabled you to see just how precious it had always been and was then, at that moment the realisation that it had almost been unconsciously thrown away and lost forever really hit home.

I think knowing where it all went wrong and why, learning lessons and taking care not to step into the real danger zone again, makes you realise that every marriage needs constant work and attention and nothing can ever be taken for granted lest any new love and new lover can prove fatal. Any new relationship can develop a far stronger passion and from there a strength of love you never rationally think even possible, the old love can be outdone by the new and a split can develop almost as the frequency, passion and excitement of the new increase, the danger creepng up upon you by stealth, and even more especially when accompanied by such a blind acceptance and inertia. It's so easy to let things become the status quo, to let the new arrangements become a part of the routine until they become more and more frequent, the new love strengthening at the expense of the old, only realising the danger when it's all too late.

By being so conscious of the risks and not venturing into recklessness you can protect what's important, losing the one so precious to you isn't worth any amount of short term and momentary excitement. The results of following a more careful approach made for a stronger lasting bond and a reminder that feelings always have to be voiced and never hidden for fear of offence if danger is to be properly averted. The ridiculous and crass objection of never backtracking even if uncomfortable or harmful is shown up for what it can be, which is absolutely ludicrous and nonsensical, things should always only progress when both are comfortable and secure in the marriage, and backtracking can be very necessary.

Too often this site just has the good news posted, when things turn bad the posters often just leave and noone who has supported them to their eventual disaster is posting anymore as the thread remains dormant, the posts just stop and noone hears.

Chris

[weysally]

I can only answer for my husband, he is a voyeur, we do MFM's mainly, he says that he loves it when from the start, I show an interest for a guy, he loves the way I try and get that guy to make a move, and when there is only the sex left, he likes to see me being undressed by him, my husband will join in at times, but on our first MFM, when I had an orgasm, he told me that he had climaxed without touching himself, my husband likes it this way because he says he has a certain amount of control over whom it can be,

[BDJ]

Weysally,

Noticed you're new. I know I speak for all here in requesting you begin your own thread describing how you became a hotwife. Perhaps in the Hotties section so you have the option of letting us get a look at your (I'm sure) sexy body.

BDJ

[MikeyP]

For me it's a mixture of things that makes the thought of my wife having other men exciting to me.
Firstly, I love her and want her to have the best sex she could ever experience.
Secondly, I feel that my cock is inadequate, being only 5 inches...6 when at my horniest. She deserves to experience bigger thicker cocks.
Thirdly, I am somewhat subservient so another, more endowed, preferably younger guy with more stamina, would be a thrill for me to see how much she enjoys it and how many times he could make her orgasm through penetration only....something that I have never achieved. For her Bull to instruct me to sit quietly while he enjoyed my wife's pussy would be very exciting for me. I would obey the Alpha Bull.
Fourthly, I do have bi-sexual fantasies so would find it thrilling to go down on her afterwards, or on him if he was that way inclined.

[Ktsmth1994]

My husband doesn't watch or join but gets the details. The guy I see is an older man who had actually been an FWB before I met my husband so it was pretty convenient when we decided to try this lifestyle. For my husband, its knowing that I'm being naughty with someone I'm comfortable with. For me, its like a little break from reality when my FWB is in town. Its a win for both of us.

[early-kink]

My husband doesn't watch or join but gets the details. The guy I see is an older man who had actually been an FWB before I met my husband so it was pretty convenient when we decided to try this lifestyle. For my husband, its knowing that I'm being naughty with someone I'm comfortable with. For me, its like a little break from reality when my FWB is in town. Its a win for both of us.

I have to agree on a couple points you made. Like your husband, the idea of my wife being "naughty" with a guy she's comfortable with is JUST HOT!! It's the "naughty" - but still happy to be my wife - that's a big turn-on. I think that many of us men, after a while, see our wives or long-term SO's as moms, "housewives", the lady on the couch watching TV in a sweat suit ....... and NOT as real live women who have wants, needs, & cravings. They may be emotional and/or physical needs - but the ladies deserve more than being relegated to a life of ruts, routines, doldrums, & "same-oldness" in their lives. Ladies have sexual needs just like us guys do. Maybe a sexy time with another guy once in a while is what can keep ALL FIRES BURNING - including the marital fires at home!!?? IMO - ladies like variety - not just in clothes, shoes, or makeup shades, but guys occasionally too. The "zing" of newness is powerful.

I've thought much the same as you on the "little break from reality" part. On this forum, I've made that point a number of times. If any woman had the chance to escape her everyday routines, ruts, "sameness" - the house, the kids, the hubby, the chores, work - for a day or an evening (or a weekend!) to enjoy time with an attractive guy she chooses, would be a breath of fresh air for her. Maybe once or twice a month (or once a week for those ladies who feel they need it!) to go out to dinner, have a couple drinks on a moonlit terrace or balcony, and then have torrid, erotic, steamy sex with her "other guy" ..... I'd have to think it would make for a very happy woman. (Of course, she and her hubby's marriage / long-term SO-relationship would have to be strong, and they'd have to both agree on her "hall pass, if the couple didn't want to ruin their marriage/relationship.)

I had a hotGF once, open on her end only (I didn't want to see other women), and it was scorching HOT. She enjoyed going on dates with other guys, and having a smorgasbord of sexual experiences, while we remained a "steady couple." AND - I was happy for her to be having a good time. Like your husband, her being "naughty" was better than Viagra for me. For me, it was emotional and sexual torture - but it was like a drug - couldn't get enough of it!!

[AndyPlays]

As an 'another' I want to thank husbands/boyfriends for letting their signifigant other to feel safe in their relationships to play with new men. Most women I have met feel secure in being able to go home knowing hubby is supportive and loving.

It makes the time with them so much better because their are little to no worries about what we are doing.

[sexy_cute_69]

It was a mutual agreement.
I get to enjoy her pleasure at a level above any she had experienced. That makes me happy to see her satisfied. We’ve only had mfm a couple times. The funny thing is the two guys were both doctors. Both met outside a medical setting.

[armyguyot1]

Welcome to the forum sexy_cute_69.

[weysally]

I would love to write and tell people how my husband and I progressed into MFM's

[armyguyot1]

Please do.

[katrinahotwife69]

I had a whole dialogue on my reply here but redacted it.

Why would a guy want this comes to his and her background and history. Nobody can say I did XYZ and think that’ll be the same for someone else.

Here is how WE see it:

It turbo charges our relationship, particularly sex life. If you think being happily married 20 years with a great sex life is doing the same thing over and over again, boy you are in for a surprise.

Great sex life with partner isn’t merely measured how often but in quality. A hotwife experience is absolutely quality.

Nothing really stirs up the hormones like a new thing.

Women love being desired. Nothing like being desired by many.

In life we are born, grow up, reproduce and die. Such is the circle of life and we aren’t escaping that. What we can do is while we can, “reproduce”. And I’m meaning the act of. This means fuck.

All too often women hit a point where they are done with sex. For many this is more a choice in life than something out of their hands. That is it’s tiring maintaining their looks, dealing with others, rather settle in a comfortable environment. And this means less and less sex. Until it’s fine she doesn’t get it anymore. Want proof? Go people watching at the mall. I guarantee you can pick out who has more and who has less or no sex. After that stage hits, we sit in the lazy boy chair and wait our turn to die.

Put this in perspective as when someone ask, why would you want your wife to have sex with another guy. Because we aren’t ready to die.

New and rejuvenating experiences, releases chemicals in your body to combat aging process. Combine that with healthy diet and exercise and see how that works. Need proof? Look at certain people and see how good they look at a certain age. And see how someone will look like crap at the same age. look at their sexy life.

Makes sense ?

[occludo]

We, as a couple, practiced the lock in chastity for several years and over time it turned into a permanent lock.
For me, if you are a woman with at least normal sex drive, not frigid one, and your husband is in cage from years, with all the orgasm through licking or toys, at some point she will still want to feel a real penis in her vagina and a good classic fuck.
Consider that this step should not come as a surprise, and should somehow be assumed when you start the path of chastity.
I think that frustrating her by not accepting, it can have more serious consequences for the couple. Starting with lying and cheating and ending with a breakup or the end of this FLR dynamic..

[LongTermHubby]

We, as a couple, practiced the lock in chastity for several years and over time it turned into a permanent lock.
For me, if you are a woman with at least normal sex drive, not frigid one, and your husband is in cage from years, with all the orgasm through licking or toys, at some point she will still want to feel a real penis in her vagina and a good classic fuck.
Consider that this step should not come as a surprise, and should somehow be assumed when you start the path of chastity.
I think that frustrating her by not accepting, it can have more serious consequences for the couple. Starting with lying and cheating and ending with a breakup or the end of this FLR dynamic..

We began with chastity and sex toys but after about a year, my wife decided she wanted a real penis inside her vagina. A few months later, she took her first lover while away on a business trip.

[Luv It]

Looking back it was because I began to get an intense vicarious erotic thrill (even a submissive thrill) at the thought my wife and one of her BFs fucking.
I could only imagine the pleasure my wife was receiving.
However, I know what a great fuck my wife is and I imagined how much pleasure he was getting fucking my wife

[mrs_reese]

Looking back it was because I began to get an intense vicarious erotic thrill (even a submissive thrill) at the thought my wife and one of her BFs fucking.
I could only imagine the pleasure my wife was receiving.
However, I know what a great fuck my wife is and I imagined how much pleasure he was getting fucking my wife

There is nothing greater than the thrill of reclaiming your wife after she’s been with her lover!
Or the wild imagination you experience of picturing her loving every moment with her lover!

[Luv It]

Personally. I never understood the "reclaiming" thing.
However, I would be consumed by the vicarious mental image of them fucking whenever she was with a BF... particularly when she went to live with one for a while.
When she would return, it was extremely erotic knowing that she was just thoroughly fucked and cummed in for many days, even weeks by a given BF.
It was like I was the one with a strange cock for her. II would be like she was my wife legally only but, an obvious whore for other men.

[54321]

Unread post by weysally » Sat Jan 14, 2023 3:59 pm

I would love to write and tell people how my husband and I progressed into MFM's

Please do, Weysally! I for one would love to read it.

54321

[Husband7]

I haven't been very active on this forum, but I think it's time I shared a little bit.

I love everything about the idea of my wife carrying on sexual relationships with other men and then coming back to tell me about it. I'm full of kinks and fantasies, so pretty much anything goes, and she has a full hall pass to do anything she wants.

She's been seeing other men for six months now, and I don't regret a single moment. Her last boyfriend lasted three months before he got cold feet, and that was probably the most exciting three months in our marriage. I lost count of how many times she got creampied by that guy, and either texted to tease me about it, or came into bed and spread her legs, showing me how bad she'd been.

What do I get out of it? I feel this sense of satisfaction that never really fades. It's more about the knowledge that she fucks around and gets satisfied by all these different men. There's something deeply satisfying about that knowledge.

[Thai_Spice]

I can definitely speak of my husband. It is really pretty simple. Because it turns him on. He gets "totally off" on his wife fucking other men. It is sort of like a drug. It is what he needs for feel intense "aliveness" and to get really high on sex. His wife fucking other men is that drug

[lisamyhotwife]

I can definitely speak of my husband. It is really pretty simple. Because it turns him on. He gets "totally off" on his wife fucking other men. It is sort of like a drug. It is what he needs for feel intense "aliveness" and to get really high on sex. His wife fucking other men is that drug

Yup, that sounds about right! And boy is it addictive.